Ayumi stayed late, working on a new release, and I was off early. Hana-chan’s babysitter was still around for three more hours before I needed to relieve her. So, Ayumi asked me to check up on Madoka-san before going home. She was alone in the house, and of course, anyone would worry that their daughter having to be alone would often get lonely.

When I rolled up in the car, I saw the small apartment they lived in. Ayumi was just starting at the editorial company, and she didn't have a chance to find a new place yet. She talked about getting a new home soon, and hopefully, one with enough room for Madoka's own space.

“Here we go.”

I said as I got out of the car. I didn't realize my feelings for the girl behind the door at that time. The only reason why I was so helpful was that she… reminded me of myself at that age. Slowly, I ascended the steps to the second floor. It was around 4 in the afternoon, and people were bustling about the apartment building.

Where they lived wasn't the safest of places, but Ayumi worked with what she could afford. When I reached the door, I knocked.

I could hear some music inside die down. Madoka was likely turning down her lively idol music to ensure someone was actually at the door. It was cute when she did this because she wouldn't say a word as if nobody was home, and she was silently hoping they'd just go away.

“Madoka-san, it’s Mari.”

I eased her mind as I called out to her. That’s when I heard her feet bounce from one end of the apartment to the other as she reached the door.

“Oh, Koda-san!”

The door opened and who was there, that glasses girl. She tilted her head and smiled brightly. She had her hair in a small ponytail that mirrored one of her idols on TV.  In a white shirt with ocean blue strips and, a dark blue skirt, she looked comfortable as she greeted me to come inside. 

 

 

“Welcome back, home!”

She teased as I stepped inside. Madoka-san was implying that I've come here often enough for this place to be my second home. It's not as though she was wrong though. Lately, I was stopping by more often than not because Ayumi didn't like the idea of her only daughter being alone for so long. I didn't mind it and I agreed that there was nothing wrong with me checking in with her every now and then. 

“You know… you don’t always need to come over and check on me. I’m a pretty big girl that can take care of herself.”

Madoka-san backed up with her hand behind her back, causing her hair to bounce. Her shoulders raised; eyes squinted slightly as she brought out the cutest smile I've ever seen.

 

"Or… do you just like me that much, Koda-san?"

 

---

 

I came back into reality briefly. On autopilot, I brought out the eggs for our breakfast. I cracked a few of them in a bowl and began whipping them, making them fluffy for the omelet I wanted to make. The memory I was thinking of played like a movie. I was sucked in, remembering the simpler days before my feelings came to be. I was nothing more than a person Madoka-san could rely on...

"Looking back on it today, Madoka-san might have already begun developing feelings for me..."

I whispered as a lightly seasoned the eggs in the bowl. 

It was only a few weeks after our first meeting. The day where I was tired and fell asleep on the couch, only to find out that I had a fever. It was then Madoka-san called Hana’s babysitter and asked if she could stay for longer. As her mom was drunk in the other room… this girl nursed me and made sure I was well enough to drive. This memory I was thinking about was only a few weeks later. After our first meeting, we'd chatted occasionally, and eventually, we'd become a bit more comfortable around each other. The way she was excited to see me in hindsight felt different from back then. 

Comparing things with the realization that she was developing feelings for me made these memories I had... far more important to me. My hand stopped whisking the eggs as I sat there... thinking about how it all developed between us.

“Hm… When did you “fall in love” with me, Madoka-san? I... don't actually know when you began having feelings for me.”

But looking back on the days before her coma… I actually didn't know when Madoka actually began developing feelings for me. In a way, her confession took me off guard. But it didn't scare me away. I don’t think I ever explored her feelings for me in this way. I… wanted to know more about what made Madoka-san start to look at me romantically. I felt like there was a door between us that I couldn't open because I didn't have the key. I would have to explore the past and find out all the right details in order to open this door and... find her. I was starting to believe if I bring up the past and acknowledge what happened, I might be better at expressing myself to Hana and Ayumi. 

But that all started with me opening my heart and not hiding these memories I've learned to cherish over the days she was in her coma. My mind was locking them away, only for me to view selfishly... because I'm a selfish person that way. But I had to change if I wanted to solve all the problems and lies that I made during these years. So, I continued to explore that past. When... did Nakagawa Madoka-san fall in love with... me?

"Yeah… I don't believe it just came to Madoka-san at the spur of the moment. Madoka-san… must have been harboring these feelings for me for a while before she eventually confessed.”

My heart was pounding as I closed my eyes and explored the past yet again. My body went back on auto-piolet as I started cooking without thinking. I… wanted to see if I could piece together the days before Madoka-san confessed to me on the bed. Like being part of a movie, my mind dived deep into that memory, cutting me off from the present as I began to live in the past again.

 

---

 

I found myself in that past memory again. The apartment was small and there was only a bathroom and a small bedroom to the right which Madoka-san and her mother would share. However, it seemed Madoka-san didn't mind, or at least she would show it. Losing her father recently and having to become independent suddenly was something she was struggling with.  That was one of the main reasons why Ayumi-san asked me to come over often... because usually her father or mother would always be with her. In a way... I became that missing piece within her life.

“So, are you going to tell me to go to bed early? Or maybe you want to make sure I take a bath and brush my teeth?”

Madoka-san chided as she skipped around the room. She bounced from one end to the other, mocking me for being the adult here. I scratched my cheek as I watched her go from one end to the other. It... made me smile, seeing her so energetic in the afternoon like this.

“You’re snarky, Madoka-san.”

I retorted as I removed my shoes.

“Oh, is that what you think I am, Mari-san?”

She shot me a glance that was a bit on the sinister side. I walked over, touched her radio that was on the counter, and turned up the music. What revealed itself was an overly childish romance musical song. It was a bunch of girls singing about romance and other overly cutesy things. I never got into this style of music, but I knew she adored this bubbly stuff. I turned to see Madoka-san who stiffen up as we listened to her… childish music together.

“Did you brush your teeth, Madoka-san?”

I could see the blush on her face magnify as she rushed over and turned it off. She was doing her best to regain the charisma she lost only seconds ago. However, she was as bright as a strawberry as she kicked around.

"S-Stop treating me like a kid, Koda-san…"

Annoyed, she brought out her hands in front of her face and began shaking her head from side to side.

“Who cares if I listen to musicals? The singing and dancing scenes are amazing. Nobody can beat that! It's not childish to listen to them. Proper young ladies like these songs too, you know?!”

She puffed her cheek and turned to the side. It was adorable and soothed my heart seeing her so playful. I... couldn't help but keep teasing her. 

“I’m just here to make sure everything is alright. Do you have dinner, Madoka-san?”

I asked.

“Yeah, I’m about to cook it in an hour. I want to finish up my homework first.”

She crossed her arms and looked at me a tad warily.

“Ehh… I finished everything else… It’s just that my English work doesn’t make sense. Even Translate-sama isn’t giving me the answers I need.”

Madoka-san pulled out her phone and showed me this “Translate-sama.” It seemed she was trying to translate an entire paragraph into Japanese, but it sounded strange. Phrases were hard to translate correctly because sayings in America aren't the same in Japan.

There is an American saying that goes like “Knock on wood.” That means “For good luck to continue.” However, we don't share those exact phrases, and if we try and translate them word for word, it loses all its meaning.

It seemed Madoka was trying to put everything in just the same. Still, she was losing the translation context, ultimately frustrating her. Annoyed, she tossed her phone, and it hit the couch with a thud.

“English is stupid!”

Like a child, she complained as she rushed into the kitchen. Madoka-san was full of energy, likely because she played basketball, and that day, she didn't have practice. So, that excess energy was reflected in her excitement today. I bet Madoka-san could have run a marathon if she wasn't stuck in this tiny apartment.

“I’ll help you, don’t worry about it, Madoka-san.”

I walked over and sat on the couch. It was comfortable as I took out my paper and pen.

“Ready when you are.”

She peaked out of her room.

“Eh?! We’re doing it right now?!”

Childishly, she complained.

“The faster we get it done, the more time we have to chat about the newest dress on the front cover of Magenta.”

“Oh?!”

Madoka leaped out of her room and nearly crashed into me on the couch!

“It’s so cool looking, Koda-san! Did you see the fringes?!”

Overly excited as always, she bounced on the couch. I took my hand, grabbed her shoulders, and stopped her from being the rabbit she was.

“Ah?!”

Tenderly, she pushed a cute squeal from her lips. Her face reddened to my surprise. Embarrassed, she looked to the side and complained.

“D-Don’t touch me so suddenly, Koda-san!”

I… just started laughing. I’m not sure why I didn’t notice the signs at the time. But Madoka-san wasn’t just overly excited because she had too much energy. Madoka… was happy to see me.

After I let go, she turned to the table and… brushed her shoulder against mine.

"Okay, mastermind… what does this mean?"

She pointed to a simple word. It was "peach." All Madoka had to do was draw a line from the word to the picture. This was a simple warm-up at the top of the page, and she was already struggling. It… made me wonder if Madoka-san was even trying anymore. Or maybe she had just given up on learning a new language and was just being rebellious that day.

“This word is a fruit.”

I said as I crossed my arms, like the guru I was.

“All of them are fruits, jerk.”

Madoka-san complained. She brought out that snark she was known for.

“Is it this one, Koda-san?!”

She pointed at the Grape.

“No.”

“This one?”

Clearly, she would go down the line until I told her which was correct. So, I decided the best way to learn was by experience.

"I think I have a fun game we both can play, Madoka-san."

I said, giving her a slight grin. 

"A game?"

Her eyes lit up as she kicked her feet about excitedly. Her cheeks turned slightly reddish as she closed her eyes and giggled.

 

"I would love to play a game, Mari-san! Don't expect to win against me, though!"

 

 

The smile she gave me was one that stuck in my memory throughout her coma. It was so bright, full of life, and ever so honest. 

Everything within me wanted to keep her happy and protect her...