“Are you crushing on anyone, Ester?”

Ester nearly spat out her milk in surprise.

“No,” she insisted, “I’m not.”

But she winced and had to bite back tears. According to her old friends, Sue was indeed pretending that Ester didn’t exist, and several other Girls had followed suit. It hurt, a lot.

She stood up.

“You okay?” April asked.

“Yeah,” Ester lied, “I just need to use the bathroom, that’s all.”

“Use the one by the main entrance,” Duela told her.

“Thank you,” Ester replied, “I’ve figured out which bathrooms are the good ones by now, Duela.”

It was a good opportunity to actually use the bathroom, though. Ester found herself wandering to the main office, wishing vainly that at any moment Sue might wrap her arms around Ester and beg to be taken back. Why did anybody date ever if it was going to hurt this much to lose someone?

As she passed by the front office, somebody stepped out of the front office with the principle.

“Oh fuck,” Ester muttered, freezing in her tracks.

Her father continued his discussion with Principle Waters.

“Carlota’s behavior has been unacceptable, sir,” he said, “Her behavior at home has been escalating as well, unfortunately. But I assure you that I will keep her in line.”

“Mr. Moreno, I asked you here because I was concerned for your daughter’s well-being—”

“She’ll learn to do better, I promise,” Ester’s father insisted, “Her behavior is shameful and she needs to be taught to respect her elders.”

Mr. Peters frowned, then seemed to notice Ester. Her father followed his gaze, and Ester’s blood ran cold. He gave her a brief glance, then turned back to facing the principle.

“I’m afraid I have to go,” he said, “But I will be in touch, Mr. Peters.”

“Of course,” the principle replied quietly.

Ester started walking, keeping her head down and pushing her hands into her coat pockets. She didn’t look up at her father as she passed, but her heart did skip a beat as he glanced at her again. Had he recognized her? He didn’t act like he recognized her.

A sob escaped her.

Her own father didn’t recognize her.

She reached the bathroom, shaking. Ester was going to sit on the toilet and cry for a while. But someone else was walking out at that exact same time.

“Oh, this is awkward,” Carla said, “I guess you figured out where the good bathrooms—are you okay?!”

Ester closed her eyes and shook her head. Hot tears streamed down her face, and she started whining. She could feel Carla pulling her head close and rocking her back and forth.

“It’s okay,” she whispered, “Come on.”

Carla dragged her into the bathroom where they’d have some privacy.

“What happened?” she asked, “Who do I have to stab?”

Ester gave a hollow laugh, but shook her head.

“Who did this to you, Eli?”

Ester sobbed at the sound of her old name.

“I saw dad,” she mumbled, “He was in the office, talking to the principle.”

Carla sighed.

“Yeah,” she said, “Things haven’t gotten better at home since you escaped.”

Ester pulled away from her.

“I was kicked out,” she said, “I didn’t escape.”

“Trust me, you did.”

Ester just sighed and told her, “He didn’t even recognize me.”

Carla’s breath caught in her throat, and she had to brace herself on the sink for support.

“He saw you?”

Ester folded her arms and leaned up against the wall, nodding.

“Graças a Deus,” Carla muttered, “he didn’t recognize you.”

“It hurt so much,” Ester told her.

Carla nodded, then added, “I’m sorry, Eli. But it would have been so much worse if he had recognized you. You haven’t heard the things they’ve said. I’m so glad you don’t have to put up with them anymore.”

“But they’re my parents too,” Ester whined, “I miss them, Carla.”

“I know.”

Carla strode over and pulled Ester into a soft hug. Ester returned the gesture, squeezing tightly. They held each other for a moment.

“But you’re better without them, Eli,” Carla continued.

Ester sighed.

“Why do you like me better, now?” she asked.

“Huh?”

Carla pulled away.

“I’ve always liked you, fofo.”

“No you didn’t,” Ester told her, her expression hard, “We never got along.”

“Just because we didn’t—”

“Carla!”

“Okay, fine.” Carla looked away. “I didn’t treat you like I should have. But I got better, Eli.”

“If you hate mom and dad so much, why don’t you hate me for ‘escaping’ them?”

Carla rubbed the back of her neck.

“I’m sorry,” she said, “Just… now that they aren’t comparing me to you all the time, I realized I never really hated you.”

Ester’s expression cracked and fresh tears started flowing.

“I cry all the time now,” she muttered.

Carla grabbed Ester’s arm and squeezed it gently.

“It’s okay,” she cooed, “You need to let your emotions out, Eli.”

Ester nodded, but scowled. Carla only seemed to like Ester now because she could baby her. She didn’t really respect Ester’s feelings or decisions. Hell, Carla wouldn’t even use Ester’s real name!

Ester opened her mouth to chide Carla, then closed it again, thinking to herself, “It doesn’t matter; I’d just make her angry.”

Instead, she told Carla, “Thank you for this. I needed someone to talk to.”

“You can always count on me, fofo.”

They left the bathroom together, but separated on their way back to the cafeteria. Ester stuffed her hands into her coat pockets and sighed in relief. She really was feeling a lot better. Why hadn’t Ester tried to find friends like Carla back when she was still a boy? It would have been a much happier experience.

When she got back to the table, April told Ester, “You were in the bathroom for a long time.”

“Sorry,” she replied, “I actually ran into my sister. We talked for a while.”

April blinked in surprise, then nodded.

“Oh, you look like you’re feeling better,” she said, giving Ester a toothy grin.

Ester thought that her smile looked a little fake. She opened her mouth to ask, then closed it. It was probably in her imagination.

Since she hadn’t gotten the chance to actually use the toilet, Ester felt herself needing to go again in the middle of her next class. Mr. Stevens was accommodating, but she felt guilty for having to ask.

She had gotten much more comfortable using the girls’ room in the past week, but it was a relief that there was still nobody else in there with her. Ester washed her hands and watched herself in the mirror. Her face was clean of facial hair, but she still kind of looked like a boy even with long, stylized hair.

“Just give it time, girl,” she told herself, turning off the tap.

When she walked out of the bathroom, though, she found herself face to face with someone she hadn’t been expecting.

“Hey, scrawny,” Jimmy sneered, adjusting his glasses.

Ester’s heart skipped a beat.

“Cole sent me a message that you were out of class,” he continued, “How irresponsible for a girl to walk around on her own. Somebody should teach you a lesson.”

Ester flattened herself against the wall, looking around the hallway. Somebody was going to save her, right? Somebody had to be around. But, no. Everyone else was in class. Jimmy had her alone.

Oh God, she was alone with him.

“You see,” Jimmy said, taking a few steps toward Ester, “You really fucked me, Eli. Things were going great until you went and made yourself queer. But now? People actually believe this shit about you being a girl. So all that work I put into putting you into your place was worthless.”

He cracked his neck and scooted closer to her.

“People aren’t okay with guys like me hitting girls. My reputation is shot. And that’s your fault. But I don’t buy it. And you’re going to get what’s coming to you, understand?”

Ester pressed herself up against the wall and whined. Jimmy was close enough that she could feel the heat of his breath against her face. She closed her eyes, but he just snickered.

“There’s no getting away anymore, Eli,” he muttered into her ear.

“Hey!” someone else cried, “What are you doing to her?”

Jimmy swore and pulled away. Ester ran, ducking behind the guy who had just shown up. He was rolling up his sleeves and scowling at Jimmy.

“Who do you think you are?” he asked Jimmy, “Assaulting a defenseless girl like that?”

Ester felt her face burn, but she just folded her arms and lowered her head.

Jimmy just sneered and stuck his hands in his pockets, walking away.

“See you soon, Eli!” he promised.

Ester whined a little. Her savior turned to face her, his face soft and inviting.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Ester nodded, still blushing. But then the boy furled his brown in confusion.

“Hey, aren’t you—”

“I need to go,” Ester said quickly, stepping away, “Thank you.”

She turned and started walking.

“I’ll… see you later?” the guy asked after her.

Ester glanced over her shoulder, smiled, and waved, but didn’t stop to talk further. As soon as she turned the corner, Ester broke into a run. She didn’t stop until she was outside Mr. Steven’s class door. It took her a moment to catch her breath again.

She ducked back in without much fanfare, but did give Cole a nasty glare whens he passed him. Ester kept her head down for the rest of class. Truth be told, she’d had enough for the day.

“Tell Mr. Stevens,” a voice in her head told her, “He’ll be supportive.”

But she replied, “He barely wrapped his head around me being a girl now. The teachers here don’t really care. If they did, they’d have never let the Boys become a thing in the first place. I’m on my own.”

When the bell rang, Ester slid out of the room without a word to anybody. She wasn’t headed to her next class. She still remembered what Thomas’ next class was.

“Thomas!” She cried, getting his attention just before he entered the room.

“Hey, El.”

“Ester, remember?”

“Right. Did you need something. I thought you had English over—”

“I need to talk to you.”

Thomas gave one last glance back at the classroom and then started walking with Ester out of earshot of everyone else. The warning bell rang. Ester sighed; she was going to get an earful from her next teacher.

She folded her arms and leaned up against the lockers, admitting, “I ran into Jimmy during my last class. He was waiting for me outside of the bathroom.”

“Kind of dirty to corner someone like that,” Thomas agreed.

Ester nodded.

“I was… I was so scared, Thomas. I thought he was seriously going to hurt me.” She was sniveling, tears welling up in her eyes. “He said he was going to hurt me. If another guy hadn’t come along…”

“Whoa, it’s okay, Ester,” Thomas replied, placing his hands on her shoulders, “Don’t worry about it. Me and the guys will take care of it. He shouldn’t be targeting you anyway; you’re a…”

“A girl?” Ester offered.

Thomas coughed into his hand and nodded.

“Yeah, that. We’ll handle him. Just take care of yourself, alright?”

Ester nodded and sniffed.

“You don’t need me to walk you to class, do you?”

Ester replied with a hollow laugh and said, “No, it’s okay. I’ve got it.”

But the crowds were thinning out quickly, and she had quite a distance to go. Ester picked up her pace as the bell rang again and the halls emptied. She felt very exposed.

The rest of the day passed without incident, but Ester was still a little jumpy when she arrived the next morning. She bade a quick goodbye to April and found her old friends near the library. From the way they looked at her, it was clear they’d all heard about the day before.

“Still as vicious as ever, Estella?” Lilly asked with a sly smirk.

“Huh?”

“We took care of it,” Thomas assured Ester, smiling softly.

“What did you do?” she asked slowly.

Some of the other guys chuckled.

“We just roughed him up a bit, that’s all,” one of them insisted, “That little shit won’t be bothering you for a while.”

Ester gave them a weak smile, but bit her lip.

“Thanks,” she said quietly.

“Anytime,” Thomas said, “Just be careful when you’re not around people you know you can trust.”

“Yeah, seriously, Ester,” Lilly chipped in, “Stick with us. We’ll keep you safe.”

Ester nodded, smiling a bit more broadly now. She leaned up against the wall and listened as the Girls in the group talked about a project they were working on. She felt safer in a group. And she hated it. Ester had been on top, once, and now she needed everyone else to keep her safe. She couldn’t take care of herself anymore.

And the worst part: it felt good to be surrounded by people she could trust.