“Man, it felt like it’s been ages since I’ve been able to smell fresh air!”

Taking a deep inhale of the cold crisp Chicago air, I couldn’t help but say in delight. 

Which is understandable when considering that the whole time I’ve been in prison, the only things I smelled in there were sweat and iron. So, while I’m on the outside, I’m going to inhale all the fresh air I can get!

“Get in the van.”

The old guard ordered as he pushed me towards a parked prison van not far away. You’d think that since we’ve talked and joked a few times that he’d be easy with me. Throwing him a glare, I walk towards the van while saying to him.

“Hey, no pushing. I’ve got my hands chained to my waist so if I fall and have a bloody nose, it’d be on you.”

“Tch, like I’d care. And besides, it’s not like you’ll die if you get a bloodied nose. It’d leave a scar at best.”

“What makes you think I want another scar? I got too many of them already.”

As a matter of fact, I got so many scars that I can’t even keep count. The war over there was brutal.

“Sigh, just get in the van. We need to get there before the funeral starts.”

Saying this, the old guard opens the back doors to white police van. The whole back space of the van was divided through the middle by a thin metal partition. One side was for the females and one side was for the males.

“I’m going. I’m going.”

Stepping into the back of the van, I take a seat. After that, the old man hopped in, got close to me, and fastened the seatbelt across my waist. Once he was done with that, he connected my ankle cuffs to the anchor that was on the floor of the van. Surprised at the level of securement he was doing, I stared at him dumbfounded.

“Isn’t this too much? Why are you treating me like a serial killer or something?”

Looking at me like I was a dumbass, the old guard said bluntly.

“Well, weren’t you convicted of murder and attmepted murder? What makes you think you’re not any less dangerous than all those serial killers?”

“Fair enough...But would you believe me if I said that those people deserved it?”

Staring the old guard straight in the eyes, I calmly continue. 

“Other than letting those other three live, I don’t regret what I did back then. As a matter of fact, if given the chance to do it all over again, I’d properly wipe them off the face of the earth.”

These were my honest thoughts. Although it’s like the pot calling the kettle black for what they did, those guys don’t deserve to live. Especially after what they did a little over ten years ago. 

They may not have remembered it but I sure as shit do. I remember all of it.

“...I take that back, you are more dangerous than those serial killers. At least they have psychological problems."

Hopping out of the van, the old guard said in a bated breath. Showing a slight smile, I lean my head against the van wall and simply responded.

“Only to the right people. Other than that, I’m all for making friends. Just like you.”

“LIke hell I am!”

And with a slam, the old guard slams the back door shut. From the outside, I hear him say to the newbie.

“You remember the address as to where the funeral is being held?”

“Yes sir! I got it typed into my phone’s GPS.”

“Good. You’re driving.”

I then hear the sound of keys being tossed.

“Yes sir!”

Immediately after that, the newbie, followed by the old guard, hopped into the front and started the van.

We were on our way to see my old man’s face one last time.

*******

It didn’t take us long to arrive where the funeral was at. It was about a thirty minute drive.

“We’re gonna have to park the van here about a block down the street. There’s too many cars parked near the church for me to get a good parking spot.”

Putting the van in park, the newbie said as he stared at the church ahead of us. On the street in front of it and spanning almost a whole block, were cars of all kinds and various people dressed in black. A few women were wiping tears from their eyes as they entered the church.

...The old man was very much loved.

Looking in the same direction as the newbie, the old guard unfastened his seatbelt and said helplessly.

“Sigh, I guess that’s fine.”

Getting out of the passenger seat of the van, the old guard makes his way towards the back. Opening the back door, he silently steps in, unbuckles my seatbelt, and uses his keys to unlock the ankle cuffs. When we stepped out, he finished taking off the chains and cuffs that restrained my body.

Rubbing my wrist because they were aching a little, I happily said.

“Thanks.”

Shaking his head, the old guard replied.

“Don’t mention it. Even though you’re a killer, it’s not right for your family to see you handcuffed like that. Especially during a time like this. However...”

“However?”

“You will have to wear an ankle bracelet.”

As soon as he finished saying that, the newbie guard appeared at the back of the van and handed the old guard a black ankle bracelet. Without wasting any time, the old guard lifted up my left pants leg slightly and clamped it on.

 It’s a bit uncomfortable but I’ll get used to it.

“Now, if you try to run, we can hunt your ass down and catch you. What? Don’t look at me like that. You better be grateful that I took those restraints off, otherwise, you’d be embarrassing yourself in front of everyone.”

“...”

He’s right. 

Especially when considering everyone that’s in there. They’re either relatives of the old man or the people he helped raise. If I were to enter the church chained up like the criminal I am, it’d cause a whole lot of unwanted drama. 

And that’s the last thing everybody wants.

Thankfully, the monitor was made with the intention of being sleek and inconspicuous in mind, so it was fairly easy to hide it under my pants leg. After making sure it wouldn’t get spotted, I started walking towards the church. Without saying anything, the two guards close the van’s back doors and follow behind.

While we were walking towards the church...

“...This place hasn’t changed all that much since the three year I’ve been gone.”

It felt like I took a trip down memory lane. 

The church I was raised in, was still a little run down,having a couple windows broken and the bell tower boarded up. I used to sneak up there when I was smaller to feed the pigeons. The old man never liked that though, saying ‘do you know how hard bird poop is to clean up?’

The corner store where I used to buy snacks and candies from, other than having a few more security cameras and new graffiti painted on it, was still in business. Which is surprising since it used to be robbed frequently. Luckily, I was never there when it happened. 

And as for the streets in front of the church, they too haven't changed. On the sidewalk in front of the church, I could see faint traces of chalk from where the kids used it to draw. I vaguely made out two of the drawings, one was of hop-scotch squares and the other was of a happy family.

Pointing my finger at a street not far down from the church, I said nostalgically.

“That used to be my old stomping grounds over there. That and a few of the surrounding blocks.”

“The stomping grounds for what I wonder?”

The veteran guard said sarcastically. Knowing what he was hinting at, I shrugged my shoulders in feigned ignorance.

“Who knows."

By now, we arrived at the stairs leading up to the church. Nobody other than us three were in sight. Everyone that came for the funeral was already inside. 

“Does one of you have a cigarette?”

Glancing at the old church doors from the base of the stairs, I asked the guards. 

“I didn’t think too much about it at first but now that I’m here, I’m actually nervous as hell. I need a cigarette to calm me down.”

Just the thought of meeting faces I haven’t seen in three years, fills my stomach up with butterflies. How will they react when they see me? 

After all, I’m the black sheep of this church so I’m sure there’s a few who hate me here.

“Sorry, I don’t smoke.”

The newbie guard said as he shook his head from side to side. With him out, I look towards the old guard. He shows a reluctant look for a second before taking out a crumpled box of cigarettes. They were a box of Newport 100s. Taking out two, he hands them over to me, albeit, a little begrudgingly.

“Sigh, here. These are my last two. Better make ‘em last.”

“Haha, I will. Got a light?”

Putting one in my mouth, I ask. To which he gives me a ‘are you kidding’ look before digging into his pocket to fetch out a cheap lighter. Giving him a ‘thanks’ I lit the cigarette and inhaled deeply.

The rush of methanol from the smoke helps clear my mind a bit. I take a few more puffs before ultimately putting the cigarette out. 

“Alright. Let’s do this.”

Taking a deep breath, I start walking up the stairs. And before I could even get a third of the way there…

“Marcus? Is that you?”

One of the old church doors open, revealing a beautiful blonde haired girl dressed in a nice black skirt suit. It fitted her quite well as it showed off her curves and big bust without seeming too vulgar.

In the three years since I last saw her, she’s become even more stunning.

“Marcus?”

The girl calls out my name, shaking me from my thoughts. Revealing s small smile, I rubbed the back of my head and said awkwardly.

“A-Alice...it’s been a while. Is your family treating you good?”

“...”

Alice says nothing and just silently walks down the stairs. Seeing her as she gets closer, I start to become nervous. Is she going to yell at me? Hit me?

“...”

She’s now standing on the step just above mine, causing her to be on eye level with me. She opens her arms…

"A-Alice?"

And hugs me. The soft and squishy sensation pressing against my chest is amazing! 

...Wait, that's not the point!

"Marcus."

Interrupting my thoughts once again, Alice's gentle voice enters my ear. Standing on pins and needles, I reply.

"Yeah?"

"...Welcome back."

She then puts some strength into her arms. From her actions, I feel no hatred or anger. Only warmth. It was a lovely feeling. 

Placing my arms around her back, I give her an equally strong hug and say a little emotionally.

"It's good to be back."

Even if it's only temporary.