‘Oh my God, Mira’, I thought with a blush, because she was actually standing out for once! I really liked that she was willing to show her gushy face in front of others for me, but I knew she’d be just mortified when she remembered where she was! I ran over to her about as quick as I could without aether, which might’ve actually been the hardest effort I’d made all night, but I’d had to do it if I didn’t want to keel over before I got to her, and as I made the last step I grabbed her into my embrace.

She locked her arms tightly around my back with an absolutely heavenly smile on her face, and it was loaded with enough of her love for me that I had to struggle a little not to kiss her. I buried my face in her shoulder instead, and a serene feeling of security came over my mind as I relaxed myself against her, and let her carry some of my weight. We held each other like that for a short while, but she seemed to have come back to her senses far too soon for my liking, as she was starting to squirm like she wanted me to let go!

“Not happening, Mira. Just… for a little longer, okay?” I hadn’t really wanted to ask her in case it made her stop doing it, but she’d definitely dropped a lot of the secrecy lately. I adored being able to do this much in public, but I had to wonder what was causing this change in her. Sure, it’d been fifteen years since we’d arrived here, but it wasn’t as if everyone in town was our friend, let alone supported our particular ‘proclivity’.

I hoped that Mira never had to hear how nasty people could be about something that didn’t even affect them and theirs, but if they were willing to transgress against me, then I couldn’t imagine what they’d say around her! She’d thankfully never told me about any particularly negative interactions with them, which was a relief because my patience when it came to people bullying her was next to nonexistent, and I really didn’t know what would happen, only that it probably involved fire, and lots of it.

Our relationship was more or less an open secret, and I was pretty sure that everybody in town knew of it by now; it would actually be stranger if they didn’t know, and especially recently. Well, I supposed that perhaps that Rodderick cow might not know it, since she seemed so utterly determined to avoid ever acknowledging Mira’s aetherless existence; it was like she refused to use her God-given vision at all, as she spent her every waking moment with her eyes so deep within the aetherial world that it couldn’t even be called enhancement anymore!

She reminded me of myself when I was younger, and richer, and less aware of the wider world, but irritation came surging to blazing life in my mind as I began to compare myself to that awful Ispanian woman! I had been six years old when I was so stuck up and horrible as she, but here she was in her early forties with no such excuse for being awful to my Mira, and I wished I was allowed to knock her off her high horse! Just once, all it would take is once, really, but she was so thickheaded that maybe twice was actually better? It definitely felt better.

I let Mira go before my seething and unstable aether could leak into her, and she immediately sat back onto her pew with a lot more haste than grace. She went so quickly away from me that my heart twinged to think I might’ve hurt her, even though my eyes could clearly see that her face was only red with embarrassment. I was only this irritable and volatile because of how much aether I’d let flow from me in the first place, and so I sought to somehow simmer myself down, but in the end it was Gerald who helped me out of my fiery mood when he got up and spoke,

“Have my seat, love-bird. I’m leaving.”

Oh? How fortuitous, but Gerald usually liked being a part of every community event, and all the more so since… Susan. I’d only really known her for a few years, but the world was definitely dimmer without her in it, and the misery Gerald sometimes carried in his eyes was enough to put anyone to tears. The sight really gave all the more reason to never let that happen to us, but he was just walking away now, so I tried to invite him to remain,

“Thanks old-timer, but I can conjure up a chair. Are you really not staying for Yuri’s baptism?”

A person shouldn’t look a gifted seat in its legs, and actually reshaping the stone floor as a pew extension would probably leave me completely breathless, but Gerald deserved this much consideration at least. He shook his head as let go a deeply guttural, “Bah.” and he waved his hand back at me as he kept on walking away,

“It’s a waste of good wine.”

Well, that was an answer anyways, though it amounted to a load of sheep dung in my opinion! I wasn’t about to argue for him any further though, as it was definitively easier for me that he left, and so I took my place beside my still fiercely blushing Mira. She’d brought her hands up like she was trying to hide her face, so it looked like the mortification had finally come and set in. Cute, she was definitely cute, and if she was only as bothered about this communion as Gerald: I could’ve taken her home and… well, I needed a bath first though… ugh, there’s always something.

Gramps on her other side suddenly got up to his feet too, and he leant down to congratulate me,

“Hell of a show up there, Princess! What you did for Elissa: she was so beautiful I don’t think I’ll ever forget. The ghoulies were great too; I think you’ve got them scared enough to pay us double!”

I had been suckered in by his deep appreciation for mine and Elissa’s improvised performance, but when he brought up our miniscule monthly stipend, I snorted and had to tell him frankly,

“Dream on, Gramps. If a little fear was all it took for that we’d be as rich as Roddericks already!”

He laughed heartily at this, and a smile floated up to my face too, but damn these old geezers were great. I wished that we’d have hung out with them more in the past, but I supposed we wouldn’t have had as much to talk about back then, aside from rescuing resources from downriver. I’d be taking Luca along with us again for one last autumn clearing soon, and we’d have gone a week ago if we didn’t have to wait for Lisset to be ready.

I was sure she’d heal up quicker and be in less pain overall if she would just let Mira check up on her, it was just her monthly after all, but Lisset hated everything to do with doctoring, and medicine in particular. The only time she’d allowed for Mira’s help at all was for Talia’s birth, and we’d almost lost our best hauler and shield that day before Bart came running and begging for doctorly assistance in the matter.

We had a heck of a venture party forming this year though; Petyr was joining our front line for his third time, Luca was excited to take part in his second major excursion, and Olga was even letting Natalie join up with us for once! The next generation was coming up, and the future was bright for us, and I was really looking forward to seeing what Natalie would do to ghouls with her relative talent for windworks; we hadn’t had a dedicated supporter since Susan’s passing.

‘Well anyways, there’s no time like the present to catch up on lost ti-!’ I was thinking to myself when I noticed that Gramps was walking away down the center gap after Gerald!

“E tu, Gramps?!” I burst out in the language of Roma, a total accident caused from his unexpected departure; not that it made it any less unpleasant to speak in my mother tongue. I really was surprised though, as Gramps had been flirting around with becoming a Christian for quite a long time now, and he almost definitely didn’t want to miss a person’s first communion!

“Yeah, Princess, me too. I’ve got to get my Elissa home safe and sound.” Gramps turned and said to me with an odd half-frown, which only showed all the more how much he’d wanted to stay and watch, and he added as if to convince himself out the door, “It’s past her bedtime.”

I stood up and shook my head, as I really didn’t want him to miss this when he had been looking forward to sitting in on a baptism and first communion so much; enough that he’d even seen fit to bore us all to death about it on our last venture, and so I quickly wracked my tired brain and came up with a perfect solution just for him,

“Why don’t you just have one of the other kids take her home for you, like Vitali? You can definitely count on him to keep her safe, and it’s only a short ways anyways. Stay, Gramps, you owe it to yourself.”

Gramps looked like he didn’t know what to say to my suggestion, and he started fussing with his thumbs while he thought about it, but Mira must have sorted out her earlier embarrassment, as she suddenly launched into support for what I’d said,

“Elissa has grown up enough that staying up slightly later than usual would not be nearly so taxing on her, Amadeus. But if you are completely set on sending her home, I must agree with Rianna: Vitali is truly an excellent choice for an escort, and he would be delighted to take your daughter home for you.”

‘Wait, what? Are you trying to get the kid killed, Mira?!’ I exclaimed in my shocked mind as Gramps growled out with narrowed eyes, “Would he, now?”

Horror took me as Mira emphatically nodded with an odd glint in her eyes, and she opened up her mouth to speak again, but she was out of reach so I couldn’t shut her up in time! My eyes almost closed to mourn for Vitali as she went on,

“Absolutely. He really looks up to you, Amadeus, like a son looks toward his father. He earnestly trains every day to be as competent and honourable a legionnaire as you, and I believe he would be well fit for the role.”

Mira drew a breath here, and my eyes were drawn back open with incredulity towards her incredibly true remarks, and I stared with disbelief as Mira puzzled out for herself exactly what she would say next before she went on,

“He often tells me that one day he will join the Legion, just like yourself, and if it were not for his asthma: I dare say he might have already gotten some experience as a guard beside you. Or rather: I would have had to let him, as he asks me every few weeks if he is yet well enough, and I believe he would ask more regularly, but that he does not wish to be a bother.”

I’d glanced back over to the old legionnaire while Mira was speaking, and I’d watched as every last drop of animosity drained away from Gramps’ face as he was subjected to her very precisely chosen support, and by the end he looked almost… morose? ‘What in the hell, is he crying?!’ I was shocked by the intensity of the old man’s emotion, and I averted my eyes back towards Mira instead, since I didn’t really know how to deal with Gramps wearing such a watery face.

“... can’t,” I heard him say all choked up, and my own heart sank as something wet was welling up from behind my eyes, completely heedless of my suspicions, “He can’t, don’t let him join the Legion, Mira.”

Mira’s eyebrows half raised, as if she’d been surprised by the degree of his reaction, but had otherwise expected something similar to this. I didn’t know what she knew that I didn’t, but her face blurred for me as she answered Gramps,

“Ultimately, I have no control over what he decides to do, but I agree with you. I believe Vitali would do better venturing out as a pioneer, and always having here as a home to return to, but he does not listen to me when I tell him that the Legion is a less wonderful entity than he thinks it is. Amadeus, he truly idolizes you, and I would be grateful if you should look after him.”

I dried my eyes with a sniff, and even though they were refilling with tears I peeked back over my shoulder to see how he was doing; I mean we are friends, the least I can do is look at him when he’s crying like that! Gramps was clenching his fists so tightly, and his eyes were leaking water even though they were shut, but he nodded to Mira’s words and said with a croak in his voice,

“Earnest boy like that; his salute was perfect. Damnit, Long Ears, I’ll do it! He’s too damn good for the Legion, and I… we could use the help.”

Mira was smiling so warmly and pleasantly beside me, the kind of knowing smile that said she knew this would happen one day; it was almost motherly. I had been shocked speechless before, but I was made completely thunderstruck by the wonderful news that’d spilled forth before me, even though it had been caused by such a misleading method, and I didn’t know what to do other than cover my mouth to keep silent and cry!

Vitali had been sweet like an elder brother to Elissa, and he was always looking out for her and trying to include her in every event. He never once reviled her, even back when some of the other children truly believed they might catch a curse from her. Elissa hadn’t even been going to come and ask for a role at all in this mass, but Vitali had dragged her in and asked me to give her a starring role!

Here I’d just been trying to do the kid a favor by getting him in Gramps’ good graces, and to give Elissa another opportunity to get out from under her father’s shadow, and even let Gramps see for himself what it took to be a member of the Christian church. I’d only wanted to give everyone around me a small bit of happiness, but Mira wasn’t like me; she wasn’t content just to do her one good deed for the day: she was always trying her best for those kids.

She had spent almost every spare day since we’d arrived here at the monastery, performing medical examinations and treatments all at her own personal cost whenever something happened to one of the kids, and otherwise teaching them or assisting Olga where possible. I knew what she wanted at the core of those feelings of hers, but it was something I couldn’t have ever… provided for.

I knew it wasn’t really my fault or hers, but I still felt the burden of that jealousy she’d long tried to hide from me, when she would stare at other families with that horribly sweet smile on her face. She’d never had a mother or father that had been worthy of the term, and the best I could do about children for her was Luca, but he was just close enough in age and appearance to be mistaken for my brother, and that was a true enough “mistake” that it was hard to honestly refute.

But here Mira gave such a bright and sincere smile of approval to Gramps, and said with perhaps more happiness in her eyes than she’d shown even when she was cheering for me, 

“I pray that you and your family have a wonderful night, Amadeus. The Lord’s light be with you.”

Gramps nodded with a determined look elsewhere, and gave us an offhanded “Goodnight, ladies.” as he left down the center aisle, where he turned and went through the cafeteria doors to retrieve Elissa, and… I collapsed onto the pew, and scooted close beside Mira again, and I just had to ask her,

“Did you just get Vitali adopted?”

Mira shook her still smiling head, and rested with her eyes closed against my shoulder as she answered me, “It is up to them what happens, as ever.”

‘Liar.’ I thought to myself as I wrapped my arm around her, and brought her closer to me. Well, everything she’d said was technically true in a sense, but she was completely and intentionally ignoring the spirit of my question! How could she act as if it were somebody else’s business when here she was the person most invested in it?

Training? Vitali played with wooden sticks, like all other kids do! Longing to become a Legionnaire? It’s just a fun dream, but he doesn’t actually have the guts! Asking if he’s well yet? Of course he does, his asthma attacks are horrible and he wants to be rid of them as soon as possible! His best trait was being brotherly, and she just omitted that like she was worried that Amadeus might be overprotective! I had to wonder at what point her orchestrated conversation had even started, as while it was true enough that Vitali respected Gramps: that really was the end of it!

Never a lie for her own sake, but forever lying for the sake of others, and I grit my teeth as my tears kept pouring down, ‘Mira, you are such a hypocrite!’ Or… maybe I was just a coward, afraid of what I might hear if I asked her the right questions. I couldn’t ask her what all I’d taken from her when I pushed my love onto her, not now, and probably not ever.

“You should pull upon your reserves already.” Mira spoke with her forehead against my chest, breaking me away from my reverie, “Your performance tonight was astonishing, astounding even, and I was very impressed with everything aside from the fleshrot victim — their disease is terribly contagious, Rianna; they cannot even be held within the same room as another patient, and any doctor easing their suffering does so at their own peril, as everything they are near to becomes infected in their manner — but here you are, looking just one good spell short of aethershock. I am right beside you now, so use it.”

Ah, so that’s why she’d been so freaked out earlier. I’d actually meant to ask her, but her stunt with Gramps and the news with Vitali had both been so shocking that they’d really thrown me! I’d felt my cheeks redden as she complimented me, but she’d just asked me to draw upon the aetherial reserves I’d stored within the ruby red phylactery that hung beside her ‘patron’ from the silver chain around her neck, and obviously I wasn’t about to do that, I’d have to be insane! But I had to give her an answer that she’d accept, so I told her,

“Mira, you know that reliquary is for emergencies only, real ones, and me feeling a little worn out isn’t even close to an emergency! Besides, just think about how crazy inefficient it would be! I’d only be getting back like a tenth of what I put into it if I tried to use it as a pick-me-up! No way, I won’t do it.”

She stared up at me with a suspicious narrowing of her eyes, probably because my refutation was a little too strong, but everything I’d told her was actually completely true, even more true than everything she’d said to Gramps, so despite the shiver running down my spine I didn’t have anything to worry about! Naturally, if I pulled it to myself through her, on the other hand: I’d get it all back with ease, but I definitely wasn’t going to draw her to that conclusion myself!

Mira frowned as she gestured to Nico coming back towards the lectern from greeting the other members of the congregation, and while giving me a nod she picked herself back up off of me and said,

“Very well, but you must promise me that you will not cast any more magic tonight.”

I hadn’t exactly planned on it, certainly not anything particularly profound at least, so I figured it wouldn’t be a problem to say so anyways, and I agreed pretty easily as Nico made the aetherlamps dim,

“Yeah, I can do that, it’s a promise.”

Happiness was still just flooding into me to think that she’d liked my performance, and I really wanted to keep talking about it with her, but she was already staring ahead in a steady silence, and she’d only afforded me with her nodded acceptance of my promise. She was definitely gorgeous tonight, and I longed to tell her, to touch her, to take her; I wished that she wasn’t so enraptured with watching this stupid bloodbath.