Chapter 8 - I - Eris goes on a trip

 

Good morning…I guess?

 

Yeah, I knew I said that even though the light outside wasn’t changing at all; however, I decided to just count every time I sleep as a full Earth ‘day’.  It’s really hard to measure time here since Chersea had no such standard.

 

Well, a-anyway, I’m having a problem as of this moment.

 

“What do you want?” I asked a group of maids that I caught inside my room once again.

 

“…” they remained silent, but all were looking back at me.  

 

Is this some kind of staring contest?

 

“If you have nothing else to say, you may get out.  I’ll just pretend this didn’t happen.” I waved my hand as a signal that I wanted them gone, but they remained on their spot.  

 

I think these girls are looking for another trouble.

 

“Uh…M-mister Kuro…” the maid that seemed to be the leader finally spoke, “W-we’re here to clean your room, so if it’s p-possible, can you leave the place to us?”

 

“…”  Now it’s my turn to stay silent.

 

I’m suspecting something fishy here.  Are they going to install a listening or monitoring device inside?  Well, I’m not yet sure if this world had stuff like that, but I guess there’s nothing to worry about since I am not guilty of what they suspect me of doing.  Yeah, watch and listen to me for all I care.  You will get nothing.

 

“M-mister Kuro.” another maid approached me.

 

“What?”

 

“Err…Big sis wants you to the kitchen.”

 

‘Big sis’.  If you didn’t know yet, that’s what the junior maids call the most senior servant assigned in the Kitchen Department, Jessica.

 

Well, whatever; I don’t give a damn.  Why did the bitch want me to come to the kitchen, anyway?  She must be up to no good once again.  I’m having second thoughts on leaving my room to these suspicious maids, but what the heck?  It’s not like they could gather any damning pieces of evidence against me…

 

In the end, even against my judgment, I went to the kitchen.

 

 

Something was going on.

 

“Please eat to your heart’s content.”

 

“Err…there’s no poison here or anything, right?”

 

“What are you talking about?” the kitchen’s boss, Jessica, retorted.  Yeah, I didn’t like that happy, cute smile.  Before, whenever I appeared in her line of sight, she’d give me a frown, or a sharp glare, “If there’s poison, of course, I won’t tell it to you.”

 

“Puuu—” I immediately spat the little food I had in my mouth.

 

“That’s mean!” Jessica pouted.  I’m having the chills watching her cute antics, “I was only joking about the poison.  Please eat in peace.”

 

Yeah, something was going on behind my back.  I mean look, before, I would cook and prepare my food, or the kitchen department maids would give me scraps and leftovers.  But this time, Jessica prepared a full course meal just for me, just as she told me.

 

“Err…is my face that weird when I eat?”

 

“Well, your face is indeed weird.” Jessica replied, dismissively waving her hand, “But it’s normal.  Pretty much the same whether or not you eat.”

 

“Then why are you staring at me?  I’m sure it’s not that nice to look upon.”

 

“What are you saying?  I enjoy watching you.”

 

She hates me.  Oh, but if I may say, Jessica’s cooking was pretty delicious.  It reminded me of that good old home cooking of my mom back on Earth.  Even though she’s my enemy, it wouldn’t hurt if I complimented on her work, was it?  

 

“This is delicious.”

 

“Ah, thank you!” Jessica smiled as she puffed her chest, “I take pride in my cooking.  They say that my talent can make any man fall for me.”

 

For someone who’s so averted to men, hearing that from you gives me horrible chills.  However, I guess I’m getting the hang of what’s happening.  

 

Haa…I thought we already settled this back in that ‘almost’ dismissal ceremony.  But apparently, it looked like Big Bitch—I mean, Big Sis Jessica had changed her strategy against me; if she couldn’t win using force, she’s bent on winning using charms.  She’s aiming for me to become enamored with her and then struck when I let down my guard.  

 

Ha!  I can read you like a book, girl; you will not win against me!

 

“Oh, so it’s Kuro!”

 

My train of thoughts got interrupted when the Head Maid—I mean, Lily—suddenly appeared.  Jessica stood up to greet her; I was about to follow when she stopped both of us.

 

“Ah, so what’s up?” I stroke up a conversation with Lily, “Is there anything wrong?”

 

“Nah.  I was just passing by.  So, how’s Jessica’s cooking?”

 

“I see.  Well, so far I’m still alive.” I was just sarcastic.

 

Lily laughed, “Ah, you don’t have to worry about that anymore.  After all, Jessica kept on asking me the other day how to make up with you.  She wouldn’t even let me sle—”

 

“Ah, p-please don’t tell M-mister K-K-Kuro about it!” Jessica was so flustered I thought of her as cute at that moment.  Lily was roaring in laughter.  

 

Dear God, forgive me, for I have sinned.  For a second, I thought the bitch is cute.

 

 

With nothing else to do—like usual—I went back to my room.

 

Just as I opened the door…

 

“…”

 

Is this another staring contest?

 

The maids whom I left cleaning my place were still there, as well as their cleaning tools.  Whether or not they tidied up my room, I couldn’t say.  What made it odd was that they were all lying on my bed…and that one maid is holding my coat to her nose.  

 

What the hell?

 

“M-m-m-m-m-m-m-”

 

“Kuro.” I reminded them of my name.

 

“Mister Kuro!” the leader of the maids blurted out; her face was red, “I thought you’re in the kitchen!”

 

“I am.  I just finished eating.” I grabbed my coat from the maid who was holding it, “And stop sniffing that.  I know I haven’t taken a bath for a long time so naturally; it’ll smell.”

 

“W-w-w-w-w-we’re sorry!” the leader of the maids quickly picked up her cleaning equipment and hurried out.  Her flustered companions also followed suit.

 

I was left bewildered, “What the heck was that?”

 

 

“Ah, welcome Mister Defender—”,

 

“Kuro.  Just call me Kuro.” I glared at the Marquise of Monfort the moment she started calling me that stupid nickname once again, “Please.”

 

“Err…K-Kuro, welcome!” the Marquise of Monfort repeated herself, “What brings you to the Armory?”

 

“Well, I was just wondering if you got a map of this place and the surrounding areas?”

 

“A map?  What for?”

 

“I want to go exploring today.  I’d like to search for a potential house to rent or buy.”

 

“Ah…that.” the Marquise never hid her disappointment.  

 

What, you think I’m going to some red-light district or something?  

 

“Tch.  And here I thought you’re going to the red-light district to pick some girls.”

 

She indeed thinks of me like that!

 

“Well, I have a map for it.  I have maps for almost all the areas in this land.” the Marquise’s proud smile appeared, “Just ask away whenever you need it.”

 

“Yeah, that’s exactly why I’m here.”

 

“Sorry bud, I left it at my family’s mansion.” was her immediate answer.

 

Then why the hell you tell me those things, you stupid paladin?  Anyway, no matter how irritated I was, I declined to air my thoughts.  I didn’t want any trouble.

 

“Well, I can have you escorted around by someone knowledgeable of the town.” the Marquise of Monfort offered a consolation, “Would you like me to arrange for that, Kuro?”

 

“Ah yes please.” I didn’t want to disturb someone else.  However, with the strange things happening between me and the maids, I hurried with my plan to find or rent a place to stay.

 

“Well, sorry dude.  All of my guards are busy with their training.” she shrugged, “I think they’ve slackened their watch while I‘m gone.”

 

This idiot…is she trying to pick a fight with me?  And besides, I think you’re the one who slackened Lady Monfort.  I mean, look around this office!  Armor pieces and weapons scattered all around.  Crumpled papers fill the spaces in-between the discarded equipment.  And…was that an old pizza with molds over there?  How did that thing from Earth get here?

 

A pigsty is much cleaner than this place!

 

“…”

 

Calm down, Kuro…you don’t want any trouble, right?  Oh well, I guess there’s no helping it.  I’ll discover the town myself then.

 

“If you’re going to town—”

 

“No thanks!  I think I can manage on my own.”

 

“Really, are you sure?  I can get you someone who can guide you around.”

 

“I-I’ll be fine.”

 

“I said, I can get you someone beautiful who can guide you around…”

 

“…”

 

“Someone beautiful and seductive who can guide you around…”

 

Uh…ahem.  W-well, I think that having a guide with those qualities wasn’t that bad.  

 

But did she even have to point out those adjectives?

 

 

Ahem.  Well, it’s not bad when you walk side by side around the town with a beautiful girl…

 

“And there she was, just as I promised!” the Marquise of Monfort was all-smiles as she introduced me to my ultimate tour guide, “Your beautiful and seductive town girl.”

 

“…”

 

I was speechless.  No, it’s not because I was awestruck or something…w-well, make that ‘I’m indeed awestruck’, but not in a good way.

 

“Mister Kuro, meet Eris.  Eris, here’s Mister Kuro.  He needs someone to guide him around the town.”

 

“…”

 

Eris and I were silent.  I could only stare at her, and she’s averting her gaze from me.  I think I disturbed her work.  And now she’s pissed.

 

Well, it’s not that I’m saying that Eris was not attractive; in fact, she was cute.  Her short, wavy, red-brown hair and brown eyes matched her gentle personality.  Combined that with the oh-so-classic maid uniform, and you get one super-cute girl for a companion.  

 

However…

 

No matter how I look at Eris, I couldn’t help but wonder if I’m going to be arrested once people saw me walking with her.  I mean, her appearance was close to that of a ten-year-old kid.  

 

How did she end up along with the ‘seductive’ route, Lady Monfort?  Are you blind or something?

 

“Well, if you’re asking how’d she end up with the ‘seductive’ description…” the Marquise whispered to me, “Don’t you know that many human nobles prefer her looks, especially because of ‘that’.”

 

By ‘that’ she meant Eris’ chest, which was like the place where the Holy Palatial Gardens stood—absolutely flat.

 

“Oi.  Don’t lump me with criminals.” furious, I whispered back.

 

“Nah, don’t worry.” the Marquise slapped me from behind, “I know you’ll take proper responsibility; you’re a man of culture, after all.”

 

“Guh…what made you say that?”

 

“You like flat chests, right?”

 

Ha?  Where did that come from?

 

The Marquise’s stare was intense.  What is she trying to prove here?

 

“N-no, I—”

 

“Flat. Is. Justice.” Her expression was getting scarier by the minute.

 

“Err…n-not exactly—”

 

“Flat. Is. Absolute. Justice.” I feel like I’m being coerced here.

 

I just nodded silently.  I didn’t want further issues with this freak.

 

“See?” the Marquise of Monfort went back to being cheerful, “You’re indeed a man of culture.”  She had a twisted smirk on her face.  

 

I shouldn’t have asked for her help…

 

“Uh…Mister K-Kuro…” we heard Eris’ spoke, “Could it be that y-you didn’t want E-Eris to accompany you?”

 

“Well, it’s alright if you don’t want to,” I replied.  To be honest, it’s fine with me whether she wanted to go.  Eris was a servant here after all, and I thought she needed to prioritize her duties more instead of going around town with a stranger like me.

 

However, Eris shook her head, “P-please let Eris come along if it’s okay.”