I woke up sometime later, and after moving my body a little I slowly opened my eyes. Looking down at me was a girl with black hair and a frilly dress, that is to say Nathalie, the princess and also my cousin.
Didn’t she say I was boring? Why is she here then?
Alice who was standing next to her looked glad I had woken up. Did Nathalie give her a hard time? She let out a sigh as she came close to me.
“Miss Oriel, are you feeling better? Do you need something? Miss Katherine has returned to the party, but I can call her if you want.”
“Am hungy~”
“Okay then, I will leave for a second while I go get Miss Katherine”
She then walks all the way to the door before turning back.
“We have a butler by the door if you want anything you can call him, okay?”
“Ye~”
Nathalie was observing our interaction from the beginning without saying a word. After Alice left, she let out a sigh and sat on the floor.
“You are lucky Oriel…”
She looked really sad. I had noticed it from earlier, it seems like Nathalie and Elizabeth’s relationship wasn’t the best one. What would make a child act like that towards their mother? I hope there is a way for me to help…
“Why~ lucky~?”
“Your mom spends a lot of time with you, I saw it while you were sleeping”
“Elizabeth~ bad mom~?”
“Yes, she is always working and never has time to spend with me”
Her eyes start to tear up while her voice sounds lower and lower.
“Elizabeth is~ queen, has to work a lot~, and why are you~ not with her~?”
“She is too occupied with talking to people and doesn’t have enough time to spend with me…”
As she says it the tears that were forming start to fall. Her cry isn’t a loud one, it is instead a low one… I can’t bear to watch it for very long, I use all my strength to get out of the cradle, doing my best to go down without falling. I reach the ground and go towards her, with my small baby steps I approach her, she seems to notice me but doesn’t look up. I got close to her curled up and trembling body and put my arms around her.
She seems surprised and tries to get away for a bit, but she gives up after a second.
“Why…”
She says while crying…
I stay hugging her for a while, I notice the butler looking through the door confused on what to do. Well, I can’t blame him for not knowing what to do when the sick baby goes down its cradle to hug a crying child, while he is at a loss, I start to hear mom’s voice in the corridor.
“What happened? Why are you…”
She gets by the butler and looks just as confused as him, the same goes for Alice who is behind her…
After they talked to Nathalie for a bit and didn’t get any answers from her, after being breastfed, it felt a little weird now that someone other than Alice or Hammond was looking, but I had gone through this process too many times to be embarrassed now…
I slept again for a few minutes, and when I woke up Nathalie was still sitting on the ground, but she was playing with my stuffed toys instead of crying. She looked entertained so I just looked at her for a bit, but it got boring pretty quick. Alice, noticing my boredom picked me up and put me next to her, she was surprised for a bit, but after a little bit we started playing together. I say together but it was mostly her leading the way with me just following along and answering from time to time…
She was so engrossed in playing that she didn’t notice when Elizabeth and mom entered the room, after she did notice the sun had already set and darkness started to set inside the small room, while Alice had lit up some lamps, they were not enough to brighten the room a whole lot. Sometimes I do miss the technologies I had in my last life…
Even big bro had appeared in the room with dad. Mom and Elizabeth sat in the bed that was put in the corner and started having a small talk, the contents were mostly about us. Nathalie decided to ignore and continued to play. I was trying to continue playing with her, but big bro was fighting for my attention. For a few moments it seemed like everything was perfect. That was what I wished for my new life; I want to enjoy my life in this weird world.
Because of how late it was Elizabeth ended up staying with us for the night. When Nathalie was asked to go to sleep with her, she refused instead opting to sleep in the bed in my room which is probably used by mom when I am sleeping. I saw her sleeping there sometimes when I woke up during the day.
Elizabeth looked a little bit sad, but she went to sleep in one of the biggest guest rooms. Nathalie ended up talking to me about a lot of things, about stuffed toys, and the stories her maid read to her, basically the same ones that were read to me. She seems to like the ones where the princess also fights instead of being the damsel in distress, although those are pretty rare.
We actually went to sleep when she felt tired. I had the impression she was a spoiled brat before today, now I know she is just a child that wants her mother’s attention. Can I do something to help her? I fall asleep while thinking about it.
I feel like the baby phase is written a lot better than in other stories i read
Also poor brother never getting any atention from his sister
True but I'm also eager to get to a time skip. It's getting a bit awkward reading about a 1 year old that understands and empathizes so well.
Currently a strong start, I'm not sure how I feel about the early chapter lengths, like it's smart and cool how you did it, but... idk. So far I'm enjoying the novel, but it's still too early for myself to review it proper.
I like it so far
The story so far is pretty good. There's a lot of progression and development of each character. Instead of directly skipping to her 5 year old self. Were she already develop her relationships. We got to see how she progressively develop it.
Another thing, is that I suggest adding more side chap as pov change. So that we can ride along with what you are currently planning, and determine why does a certain character did that. Instead of questioning ourselves who the heck is that character? And why did he or she did that?
I suggest reading Faraway Survivor if you want some reference on how to do that...
I already had plans to do some side chapter stuff with different characters POV, I just haven't found the perfect opportunity to do it.
Instead of questioning ourselves who the heck is that character? And why did he or she did that?
What part did you find confusing?
Anyway thanks for reading and for the feedback
@topoko hahaha there's no confusing part at the moment. What I'm trying to say in that part is,you should make a back story of why did an event or plot in the chap happens. In short, can you give us a foreshadowing of why did an event like that happened? and also the backstory of that characters and the main reason he did that
@Wkppp I don't know if I completely understood what you meant, but I think I understand the gist of it. I do intend on doing side chapters with different POVs but I haven’t found a good opportunity yet. About certain characters’ background stories I don’t know yet, but it is a possibility in the future. (If I find a story that would be interesting enough to write I will <3)
@topoko