╔═══ Author's note ════╗
Edited by Psycho S.
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Bing Shi swallowed heavily, closing her eyes. The more she thought about their relationship, the more she was being forcefully confronted with the truth. The truth of their relationship made her want to cry, more and more and more. She wanted to cry a new ocean into existence when she acknowledged how screwed she was.
There were chains built around her limbs. When they were first made, she had no clue (but she suspected that they were made far before she agreed to be with him), and why they were shackled around his neck, she would never know (each lone chain merged into one thick collar locked around his neck and she did not want to find out why). She only knew that if one of them were to go this way, the other would not dare to go a different way. They just couldn't hope to function normally without the other…
"I'm taking my baby for a stroll tomorrow. We'll visit the movie set to cheer on you, alright?" He whispered softly into her ear. He knew how his wife had a love-hate relationship with his cars and, with this, he hoped that he would get a reaction from her.
Lu Kai adored her love language; despite hating PDA more than he did, she confessed her love to him before the whole world in a very specific way. She confessed thrice in a row, and only he had the sacred knowledge of knowing this.
When he thought that his love was too much for anyone, she proved him wrong. He still couldn't get used to it. To receive the same amount of love as delivered… It made him feel happy. His mood stabilized. For how long? He didn't know himself.
"Bing Shi, I'll behave. I promise I won't break anyone's jaw for looking at you the wrong way…" He said as he nuzzled into her wet cheeks. Why was she crying again? Each soft hiccup that left her chest felt as though his heart punched itself in a steady beat.
He hoped that she could understand his love language, which was much simpler than hers… He ran his steady hands down her thighs and then to her curled knees. He allowed his fingers to trail softly on every raised goosebump that arose on her delicate skin; he savored the feeling of soft hairs greeting the tips of his fingers as a mimic of a wave.
Slowly, he slid his arms around her waist once more and softly kissed one of her closed eyes. With everything he did, from the words he said —like a promise looking like it was ready to be broken— to the touches he gifted onto her skin —she was glass, she was glass, she was glass… and he was a hammer—, made her pour more tears into his chalice cup of a heart.
The taste of her tears was salty when he licked at one corner of her eye, the same one he'd sweetly kissed before. "Oh my love," Lu Kai reverently whispered into her reddened skin as he nuzzled into her neck. She shuddered when the tip of his nose teasingly glided from behind her ear, to her uncovered shoulder. When did his shirt slide down?
"Do you hate me?" He questioned as he placed fleeting butterfly kisses from her shoulder, down, down, down to her shaking hand. She opened her mouth to speak but her voice probably escaped her with her running tears.
He opened up her hand to admire each individual finger with a gentle peck of his lips. One, two, three, four… He moved his head down to press his lips briefly at her thumb, finishing up his worship of this particular hand. He then leaned forward and pressed her palm into his forehead. Slowly, so slowly, he would mouth softly at the veins in her wrist.
From her angle, it looked as though he was praying to her. Did he think of her as a goddess or a monster in disguise? She wept softly. He murmured into her skin, his breathy voice almost lost to her ears, "Am I annoying you, my dearest?"
Bing Shi sucked in her breath. Her chest hurt when she tried to breathe. Her hand, the one he seemed to favour, pushed weakly at his forehead. She didn't answer his question as his grip tightened on her hand. Instead, she would mutter, her voice nasally, "You're hurting me…"
Seeing that he finally got a reaction out of her, he immediately asked her, "Do you want me to give you some space?"
At her nod, Lu Kai felt miserable. He wanted to jump off a building; she had to be very annoyed with him— she touched his cheek and parted his lips to observe his fangs. This action gave him some hope. He let go of her hand and watched as she removed his fangs.
"Those…" She began as she put the fangs on herself, "...are mine." She finished the sentence after pausing to rub her eyes. He then silently watched as she turned away from him and sobbed silently, blowing her nose into his expensive shirt in a loud manner. His sudden gentleness made her want to cry unreasonably again.
Lu Kai threw away the intention of giving her some alone time. He may have been misbehaving again, but so what? Xuan Mu would also do that. Asking for some space didn't equate to being alone. He still decided to be a good boy and stay close yet respectfully distanced to avoid upsetting Bing Shi.
He curled his body around her and hugged her from behind. Satisfied with this, he ran his tongue up the side of her tilted neck and ran it all the way up to her ear. The tip of his tongue tickleed the outer rim before it retreated smartly, avoiding the smack from Bing Shi, "I've always wanted to avoid this, but it's unavoidable. Bing Shi, what's the next stage of a love-struck fool? I think I'm advancing." He muttered into her ear after playing with it.
"Maybe go ask the one you love more than me?" She quietly recommended this suggestion to him. She blinked as she registered the obvious bitter tone in her voice.
"That's what I'm doing. I always come to love the current Bing Shi more than the past Bing Shi. Let me explain..." Lu Kai continued to blabber some nonsense for a whole hour until his throat went dry, "Would you mind shutting me up with the stunt you pulled a while ago? Or should I continue satisfying your inner sadist?"
Cupping his cheeks, she kissed his bitten lips, succumbing to his advances. His tongue was long and soft and seemed to wrap itself around hers. The flames that licked at her insides were not brought into existence by desire; no, they were fueled by this man's love for her. Eternal. Hot. Terrifying.
He took control of the pace of the kiss. Even though the kiss was slow, damn if it weren't burning him up on the inside.
Tears slid down her cheeks as a result of the passionate kiss— the tears did not contribute to the salty ocean, nor were they the beginnings of a new river of despair. No, no, no… They were a physical manifestation of the fanning flames inside of her. Her tears, watery as they were, were a show of the ashes that he turned her logic into, simply because of this all-consuming kiss.
He changed her into a big crybaby who could take down a group of barbarians. Weak before him, strong before others, that was who she became, thanks to his patient molding of her into someone who could take what others gave.
How was it possible for a man of this caliber to be so insecure? She thought they already resolved this crisis. The change happened out of nowhere. Why was it here again? Shouldn't she be the insecure one?
Bing Shi sighed as she wiped away her remaining tears and blew out the last of her snot into his shirt. After doing so, she looked up at his massive frame, which pinned her from both sides, and said, "Before we do anything… Let's take this somewhere else. I don't want to dirty our couch."
╔═══ Author's note ════╗
Lu Kai is not abusing Bing Shi like Mo Luwei would, but he is questioning her love for him.
This scene is just one of many instances where he confronts her feelings. Now that he knows the truth, he is afraid that she would love her soulmate more than him.
Bing Shi is hurt because he makes her feel like she is not doing enough for him, for their love. Yet, he has a way of bringing joy back into her life, creating a tangled web of emotions that metaphorically chains her to him.
She fears she will become like Su Min, where she views her lover through rose-colored glasses, dismissing any warning signs that come to rurface.
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