Me and Nola were sitting at my dining room table with our parents sitting on the other side. They  really won't listen to us, but I try again.

"Mom, dad, Mr. and Mrs. Uro, you got to believe me. This is all just a misunderstanding. Yesterday, when I went to my room, Nola followed and just wanted to lay next to me and we ended up falling asleep."

"No you didn't," my mom just blurts out. "I know how this goes. I've read plenty of webnovels to know how the young people lie to their parents."

"You've read too many of them, mom. Those are fiction."

"Well, they seem so real. But anyways, what proof is there that you didn't perform your masculine duty with your majestic force?"

"Mom, stop it with the prose. You are giving me mixed messages. And if it's proof you want, well, we were clothed when you saw us, weren't we? That means we didn't make that kind of contact."

Then Mrs. Uro spoke, "that's not proof. You just put your clothes when before we came in."

"No mom," Nola says, "it's true. We just woke up when Mrs. Peeper opened the door."

Her mom gasps, "Mrs. Peeper, you too?"

"What? Me?" my mom asks.

"I can't believe. Mother and Son involved in..."

"Hey, now, you better not be insinuating anything."

"Don't lie to me. I saw your webnovel account. Now I know why the incest tag is in a lot of the stories you read."

"You leave my account out of this, or we're going to  talk about your prefered tags."

Mrs. Uro gasps. "I never told you my account. Don't you dare tell me husband."

"I already know," said Mr. Uro. "No, I'm not doing that."

"This is ridiculous!" I shout. "You know me. You know I wouldn't do anything like that to Nola. What makes you think I'm interested in her?"

"Don't you shout boy," Mrs. Uro says. "Don't think I don't know about your secret trips to the bathroom together."

"Secret? I've been doing this for years at your insistence."

"No, no, no, I meant the s-e-c-r-e-t trips. Yeah, I know all about them."

"You are making that up or are misconstruing facts. Where did you even get that idea?"

"Nola told me. She told me, 'mommy dearest, Nasty Elon is trying to take me to the bathroom against my will.'"

"No, I didn't," says Nola. "Elon, I never said that."

"Well, you didn't say it like that, but I remembered you said something like Elon was being difficult and pushy, forcing you to the bathroom. It was recent."

"That was back in 4th grade, and that was back when I couldn't use the boys bathroom but had to because the girl's bathroom was out of service. Elon was just trying to help me get used to it, but I thought he was being too pushy."

"See, proof."

"Son, how could you?" said my mom.

"You guys! You are going off topic!" I resume. "You're changing the subject and using hearsay in your arguments."

"Don't you use profanity with me!" says Mrs. Uro.

"I... beg your pardon."

"Elon," my mom says, "watch your language."

"I didn't say any swear word."

"You did," says Mrs. Uro. "You called me hen face."

"No. I said hearsay. That's information misheard and misinterpreted."

"How convenient that it just so happens to rhyme with a word I don't know and therefore can't verify if you actually said it."

What is that statement suppose to mean? I swear, these people have been playing mind tricks on me. Maybe that's why I'm so good at solving riddles.

"Alright, enough," Mr. Uro finally speaks. "We heard their story a million times. Now it's time for punishment."

"Punishment?" Nola says.

"Oh, not you sweetie. You can go home now."

"No. I want to be with Elon. I don't trust you right now with those pruning sheers."

"Little Nola," says her mom, "Elon has been a very naughty boy. We have to deal with him now and teach him a lesson."

And I spoke up, "what lesson are you intending on teaching me? I'm innocent. I just said we woke up with our clothes on. That's proof that we didn't do anything."

"That's no proof. When I was your age, I could take off and put on my clothes in record time compared to the other slutty girls."

"Uhh... good for you?" I swear, these people have something in mind but the words come out wrong. It's like they open their mouth but don't realize what they are actually saying.

"Enough of this," Mr. Uro says. "It's time for punishment. Elon, pull down your pants."

"Alright, that's enough," my dad speaks up. "Look, you guys are getting all in his business and accusing him of something that may or may not have happened, and I'm leaning on the not. We know Elon, he's a good boy, and he's been very respectful of Nola. He would never do something like this, and even if he did, so what? They're teenagers, and we have been pushing them to be together for Nola's bathroom problems. So if anyone is to blame, it's us. This may have been caused by our involvement in the whole bathroom predicament because we refused to acknowledge it. We are just as much to blame."

Am I still dreaming? Is my dad actually standing up for me with confidence? I can't believe it. It's a miracle!

"Honey," my mom says, "shut up and sit your butt down."

"Okay."

NO! DAD! GET UP! You were doing so well!

My mom continues, "Son, Nola, who is like a daughter to us, your father is right. We kinda did incur this and he made a good point. But I didn't like how he said it, so I'm not counting it. But... I get it. You are in love, and we must respect-"

"Mom, didn't you hear what I said yesterday?"

"...respect your choices when it comes to-"

"Mom, yesterday, when I told you I was going out on a date with-"

"-COMES TO HAVING AN INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP-"

"Honey," my dad says, "he's going out with another girl. You got to face it eventually."

"No, impossible. He already has Nola."

"No, mom," I said, "I am not interested in Nola like that."

"How could you? You and Nola have been destined to be together like two butterflies flying from the grave of your former reincarnated bodies. You're practically cheating on little Nola, whose like a sister to you."

Okay, now I'm convinced that these people have no idea what comes out of their mouth, poetics or not.

"Say whatever you want, mom. I'm not interested in Nola like that, and I'm going out with Heather tonight."

"Son-"

"No mom. I'm putting my foot down. I'm through with this." And I storm out of the room and return to mine.

I close the door and lay on my bed. Man, can't this end already? This whole bathroom thing is now officially turning me crazy. I'm now seriously considering the doctor's advice. I should seek help, I'm going nuts.

The door opens and Nola comes in. Oh no, I don't want to see her right now, but...

"You need to use the toilet?"

"Elon..."

"What is it?"

"I hope you enjoy your date..." and she runs off.

What was that?

Oh man. There I go again, feeling guilty. Am I going to enjoy my date with all this nonsense? Well... irregardless, I'm going to consider this my first step into independence. I got to get out of here and clear my head for the first time in my life. I'll consider therapy if I need it as well. And more importantly, I'm going to have to work with Nola even harder to finally free her from this mess.

It's time to finally end this.

Whose that peering from the door?

"...Elon ... I actually need to go..."