Hanging out with probably-not-James was fine, if a little frustrating. Hanging out with Brie, who didn’t know she was a girl, was fun and hopeful. It was fun and relaxed with just enough occasional hints of the cute girl underneath to make me really excited for the future. Neither of those were the girl in front of me. In front of me was a gorgeous woman, she wasn’t a hint at things to come, she was very overtly being something I wanted right. fucking. now. My gay brain couldn’t decide if it wanted to ravage, cherish, kiss or cuddle her. Well, it couldn’t decide which one it wanted first.

But, and damn I hated that there was a but, I needed to wait. She wasn’t ready yet. She hadn’t found herself yet and didn’t need me confusing things while she was still working them out. I could wait. One look at the woman in front of me made it very obvious how worth it waiting would be, even if waiting would now be harder than ever. I would have to settle for teasing her towards self-discovery, which was at least fun in it’s own right and not just for me! I could feel how excited she was, just anxious and conflicted too.

Thankfully, I had the perfect excuse for teasing and expanding her horizons: drinking games! We had a bar to meet the other lawyers in later and student budgets dictated being a bit drunk when you arrived. The evening's game of choice was simple, poker but with drinks instead of chips.

After almost an hour of basically just ‘I raise you this much wine’ and giggling, a bottle and a half of wine had been polished off between us. Her happiness from earlier had also bubbled to the surface, she was smiling non-stop and laughing and just generally having a better time than I’d ever seen her have. Right there, slightly tipsy and on the floor in our dorm, I saw my soulmate for the first time, nothing could ever be more perfect than her smile and her happiness.

“I don’t think I need the rest of this glass just yet, instead, I shall raise you one favour, just for you, just for this evening” That offer brought an excited glint to her eye.

“Ooh, you should have said that was an option! Yes, call!” God she was pretty, would it be inappropriate to ask her to kiss me? Well yes, but would it be worth it?

My aces beat her queens and caused adorable pouting, an already worthwhile prize. I’d take my favour as well though. “Later tonight I’d like a dance with you, and none of that awkward shuffling you normally try to get away with. For one song, you let loose and dance with me properly.”

“Oh umm... Okay? I can try that. But we’re not done yet, I’m getting a favour out of you too.” 

Two rounds later, I made the mistake of trying to bluff someone who could feel my emotions. We’d both tried bluffing a few times throughout the evening to zero success. It didn’t help that this time she had a good hand. “I’ll be having that favour now, flush!” 

There was a joke somewhere here about flushed cheeks and a poker face, but I was too tipsy to put those pieces together. I happily listened to her demands. “Tonight, you’re not Ria, you have to act like Tiberia, who is a lawyer and sexy and um... Serious and possibly maybe secretly a dominatrix on the weekend.” I made no attempt to stifle my laughter, she was so cute!

“Brie, you’re on. I do wonder who’s dominatrix people will assume I am or why I’d keep it a secret.” I winked while her cheeks turned bright pink and I received a strong mix of embarrassed and horny over our link. She was just so easy to fluster and it’s always so worthwhile!

A few more rounds and the rest of our second bottle later, we’d both tried to bluff each other and somehow my high card ten had won another favour. I knew what I wanted to ask and was now tipsy enough to actually ask her. “Okay Brie, just forewarning that I’d let you back out at the cost of more wine. So if I’m Tiberia the lawyer for the evening then I’d like you to be Brie, the sexiest girl in the office and my personal arm candy, a secretary to whom I give very preferential treatment.” Did it still count as playful teasing when I wanted her this badly, or was it roleplay?

“G-girl?” She stammered out, sounding both hopeful and terrified. Please work it out in the next minute Brie. Please!

“Only if you’re okay with it, you could try having fun with it this evening. You are dressed the part.” Her excitement overcame her anxiety, likely aided by the alcohol freeing up a few of her inhibitions, she practically beamed at me.

Her mind made up, I watched her try and hit me with a seductive smoulder, which worked better than I want to admit for the one second it took her composure to dissolve into a fit of giggling. “So um… if I’m your arm candy, that means you’ll uh, hold my hand when I’m nervous… and stuff, right?”

I wanted to protect her from literally everything, she was so precious when she got tipsy and worried. “Of course hun, you know that you can hold my hand whenever though right, not just this evening. We are soulmates after all.” After an anxious nod from her, I reverted from reassurance back to confidence and seduction. “Tonight though, I want my girl holding my waist, not my hand, I won’t settle for less baby.” I put particular emphasis and a lip bite on ‘girl’, her blushing smile was well worth the effort.

The whole way to the club Brie clung to my side delightfully, she briefly tried to pretend it was for balance in the low heels, but she was much better at lying to herself than to me. If we’d gone out looking like this a year ago I like to think we’d have gotten ‘hot gays and pda’ stares, but the new age of romantic fulfilment was really kicking jealousy in the dick, so I had to content myself with self-validation. And Brie’s, it seemed especially easy to distract her tonight.

At the bar though attention returned to us quickly, every other couple there had clearly either swapped clothes with their partner or gone and found actual costumes from costume shops. Actually looking good drew a lot of eyes and of course the other lawyers were drunk enough to ask about it.

Brie’s anxiety flared and was squashed by a one armed hug the moment someone started walking over. The couple approaching was a girl, Ellie, from my course, in an oversized suit and with terrible drawn on facial hair, and her partner, the presumed owner of the suit, squeezed into a too small dress and in lipstick he’d clearly applied himself. Both seemed drunk. “Ria! You made it! But shouldn’t you and your girlfriend have facial hair this evening?” Brie went very tense. “No, wait, wasn’t your soulmate a-” 

Brie somehow found other muscles to tense, but I cut Ellie off. “Ellie, you’re not trying to deny me my sexy secretary are you?” I had an important point to make about women breaking the patriarchy’s monopoly on sexy secretaries, unfortunately alcohol had jumbled too many words around for me to attempt the sentence.

“You know what, you do you babes. Now, drinks!” Drinks were a much better idea, Brie’s relief matched my own over the idea.

Following a round of too-sweet shots we resorted to the other activity that was traditional in bars with music set just slightly too loud for regular conversation, dancing! The dance floor/space without tables was already filled with drunk law students and their partners. We made a tokenistic effort to wave hello to everyone I recognised but mainly we just wandered over to Ken, the guy I had inadvertently ended up sitting with in all my lectures. Ken was as camp as he was gay, by which I mean very. He was also the only person I knew of with two soulmates, both of whom were dancing next him. The three of them made an interesting image in their matching outfits, although I think the cardigans gave me librarian vibes rather than secretaries.

“Ria, darling you look amazing! And who is this little beauty?” Ken had met Brie, more than once and definitely knew I was a lesbian, but had never pressed me for details about my relationship.

“Thanks Ken and don’t tell me you don’t recognise Brie, she looks amazing right?” I did my best to communicate, in one second of eye contact, my entire understanding of Brie’s gender identity and the little bets we’d agreed upon. I’m sure he got most of it.

“Well Brie, you look gorgeous, Ria is a lucky woman.” Thank god for Ken having enough tact to take this in stride.

“Th-thanks Ken, I uh… like your skirt?” Brie had calmed down enough to just be her usual adorable socially awkward self, rather than mute. Although the stammer did seem a little incongruous with how hot she looked.

After thirty minutes of dancing and another drink, things were going amazingly. The rest of the party hadn’t yet reached the ‘everyone is making out’ stage that was now integral to modern clubbing. They were however deep in the ‘hornily grinding’ stage, but for the first time I wasn’t feeling left out. Brie and I were definitely long passed tipsy and well into drunk, and she could definitely keep pressing her cute butt into my crotch. At some point I’d wrapped my arms around her waist and I’d never wanted to let go of something less.

Thirty minutes more passed, I think. People were making out at least, that probably meant time had passed. I was desperately trying to think of something I could do that wasn’t nibbling her ear. Previously I’d manage to settle for squeezing her butt, but I think that might have only been one minute ago. We’d both enjoyed it though, her especially, so maybe ear nibbling was okay? Or was that functionally crossing the unspoken barrier between platonic horny grinding and romantically invested kissing. Wait, could horny grinding be platonic? Whatever, kissing would be crossing a line, I did have an idea though.

I leaned forward, into nibbling range, and in my best seductive voice I asked. “Brie, baby, I believe you promised you’d let loose with me for one song?”

She didn’t respond other than to spin around to face me and wow her smile was pretty. All of her was pretty. Her hands were around my waist, our hips were swaying in time, our bodies so close together. Our foreheads touched briefly and I could feel her warm breath on my lips. One, or perhaps both of us, pulled our hips together and our lips touched. The first kiss was tentative but the second went totally unrestrained. Her lips were so soft and her tongue so eager as it tangled with my own. This was what I’d been missing, my hand on the back of her neck, pulling her close and never letting go. It was one beautiful, perfect moment. For one whole song, I had it all. But as the music faded, I could feel the guilt and panic rising in her, she released my waist, took a step back and fled the bar. I wasn’t far behind.