Kana once again observed and analyzed everything before her, taking in the robed woman and all of her surroundings.
From her voice, Kana could only tell that the older woman still sounded reasonably spry. It matched what she suspected about Fuzō and her own above-average vitality. She felt confident that there was indeed bloodline-related reasons involved with this, reasons she intended to find out.
However... that was about all Kana could infer at a glance. Unable to see the woman's face, Kana realized now just how much she had learned, how much better she was at observation when she could see her opponent's face and read their body language. Things which she struggled to do now.
Furthermore, Kana had the distinct impression that the robed woman was trying to get a read on her, as well. Naturally she might be imagining this, but Kana still felt paranoid.
After all, this atmosphere was kind of...
Her mind was in overdrive, her desire to conceal herself warring again with her desire for answers. Even if at the expense of some caution, this was simply too great of an opportunity. Kana felt her patience failing her, her chakra racing along it's channels to the point where it was starting to make her skin tingle with the flow of energy.
Kana's ears pricked as she heard something.
"Hmm, Black Ops, then? Is... that, really right?", the woman murmured under her breath.
There was no way she meant the girl to hear that, but Kana's ears were far too sharp. Kana's mind raced at the implications of these words, planning out new scenario-
"My apologies. Naturally if you've responded to the mission request, we must play these little games. Might I have a suitable name with which to address you?"
Mission request? Kana knew of no such thing. Was this a trick? No, was she trying to get Kana to reveal her affiliation? It might not be possible to continue with this misunderstanding in place. And the woman's tone... she wasn't displaying much emotion in her tone. It felt off, somehow? It was hard to understand what her opponent was thinking. Shouldn't... the woman be more worried about Fuzō, her daughter? There wasn't any anxiety or worry, nor even much urgency in her words. She spoke almost... matter-of-factly, dispassionately? Was this intentional? Kana's heart beat ever faster, her body tensing and chakra pulsing with focus and readiness.
Before she knew it, Kana flinched, realizing her thoughts had left an unintentional silence that had now long since fallen across the room. What had she been asked, again? This was bad! What to do-
The woman continued again, in the same calm tone of voice.
"Again, my- my apologies for troubling you. We are grateful for the response to our request. I was not made aware that there were sensitive circumstances to your arrival. If Black Ops are involved, I am not equipped with the authority to finalize the posted mission. However, I must at least act according to the security procedures."
This time though, she turned her head slightly back and forth between the table behind her and Kana. The body language did convey a hint of worry. What...? Just what was going on here? The woman before her just made some kind of assumption, right?
"The barrier formula showed that two valid chakra signatures had entered, but one... was a signature we had no log of and- did not recognize. May we be safe in assuming that this is indeed... you? We must ask that you vouch your identity as the owner of thi- this signature."
As she said this, the woman retrieved a wooden placard or talisman of some kind from the table behind her and slowly approached Kana with it. Hung from a string, the rectangular wooden object had innumerable symbols shifting over it's surface.
Kana peered at it intensely, and the vague sensation of familiarity like when she was observing the door returned. Fascinated and alarmed, Kana's body braced as she gazed at it even more intensely, feeling like she could almost read or understand something within that complex mass of symbols. Was this... a barrier formula?
The nature of this power intrigued her and she focused even more as it drew closer, worried about the talisman's function. She wanted to know, to inspect it, but... was touching it even safe? This power could be dangerous. No, was definitely dangerous, what if it was a tr-
The talisman's symbols exploded into shades of amethyst-purple light, surrounding the whole block of wood in a halo of light.
The robed woman flinched backwards at the flash and dropped the talisman to the floor, the bright lights soon accompanied by a mild gust of air that blasted outward. Interestingly, she did not even cry out or gasp. She merely stumbled backward while trembling slightly.
On her end, Kana had leaped backwards a few meters, body braced fully for combat. Only by a profound feat of restraint and control had she managed to prevent her chakra from fully exploding out or releasing one of her chakra chains for defense. Was... was she just attacked? Or had she been the one to attack unintentionally? The situation was not making any sense now, but was still more delicate than Kana could imagine. Things were getting out of hand fast, she needed to see-
Eyes already raising despite the glaring light, Kana directed a sharp gaze towards the robed woman, who was slightly hunched and facing away towards the table. A few meters further away lay her veil, fallen to the floor after the gust of air.
Kana's eyebrows drew down ever-so-slightly behind her mask, eyes narrowing.
As the lights from the talisman started to fade, the woman slowly turned around with her hands on her knees. In a new and uncharacteristically shaking voice she spoke once more,
"S-signature con-confirmed. Our- our apologies, but- we truly do, did not expect..." the woman's voice faltered, dropping into nearly a mutter, "in Mito-sama's... personal formula..? Wha-"
As last of the light from the talisman died out she raised her gaze to look at Kana again, allowing the alert girl to get a full view of her face. That didn't help with understanding her words however, but Kana again pivoted her thoughts to seize on this chance.
Save for a few age-lines around the woman's eyes, she looked surprisingly youthful. Her face was very similar to Fuzō's, roughly oval-shaped but with a firmer jawline. Her hair, cut short to about shoulder-length, also had more of a rusty shading to it than Fuzō's bright red. But her eyes... were nearly identical to Fuzō's dark gray. Kana no longer had any doubt that this woman was Fuzō's mother.
Kana's gaze snapped toward signs of movement further behind, her chakra once again nearly leaking out at the peripheral sight. The male figure still seated on the table was trembling somewhat as well, blotches of moisture staining his veil around the forehead and ear regions. Was he... sweating?
Standing up suddenly, Fuzō's mother looked at Kana with wide eyes, "I- we must know now! What capacity are you here in, to be recognized with this authority?! W-who are you?"
One of Kana's eyebrows twitched.
What exactly was even going on anymore? Her forehead and temples were feeling hot. Her patience was wearing thin this whole time. She couldn't even finish a single damn thought without a thousand more problems and questions suddenly coming up!
A slight sound of cracking sounded out from Kana's clenched jaw, her gritted teeth protesting under the pressure.
'Who are you?'
Who was Kana?
Maybe not in so many words, but Kana came all this way here to ask the same damn thing! Why was it so difficult now?
Her fingers had been twitching towards the blade hidden on her back, and she'd had to stop herself from subconsciously drawing it three times now. It wouldn't be wise. There was no reason to anyway. To occupy her tense hands, she clenched them together in front of her.
The resulting crunch from squeezing her own bones, though unintentional, sounded extremely menacing in immediate hindsight.
A deep breath.
Kana could resolve this. She could work out what was happening here. Patience... she had always had patience.
A deep breath slowly released.
It was fine. It was fine. She could ignore the pressure headache beginning to assault her. She could unravel this, given time.
Answers were right in front of her, if only she could ferret them out. It could redefine everything! No matter what, total caution had to be secondary to boldness here. Anything else would be excessive. Kana could not afford to become passive due to excessive caution and waste this opportunity. Her lack of context and information had to be resolv-
"No, could it be? Black Ops? Have you- have you... done something to my daughter?"
It was barely a whisper, probably spoken of irrational fear. Probably not meant to sound so accusing. But Kana heard it at the limits of her already tested patience. Patience which had been wearing thin for months.
An unreasonable anger stirred up from the murkiest depths of the confusion in her heart. They questioned her, and she could handle it. But the accusation of hurting Fuzō... it stung.
Kana knew anger. She knew fury, hatred, and absolute revulsion. These feelings were... a 'gift' from the Shinigon. He had been paid an appropriate price in return.
But this anger felt different. Not quite disgust, it brought with it something like... indignation?
It came from a different place, like she had learned the feeling anew, baptized in the inarticulable frustration that overwhelmed her usually steely hold on her emotions.
Roiling amethyst chakra exploded out and condensed around Kana, for she was no longer able to concentrate on suppressing it. No, she hardly wanted to suppress it anymore. She had been suppressing herself for far too long it seemed, perhaps she had forgotten how to take action. She had not forgotten her strength... nor the perilous positions it put her in. But still...
The pressure and weight of her personal energy flooded the room, violently flapping her robes around and dislodging her cowl in the process. Soon after, the entire length of Kana's brilliant maroon hair floated up and around her, filled and pulsated by the energy rushing within and around her body.
Fuzō's mother had fallen on her hands and knees, limbs shuddering. On her face was wide eyes filled with confusion and...awe? The fallen talisman on the ground nearby cracked and shattered into splinters. The man on the table slumped forward, a slight barrier appearing between him and Kana. She cast him from her mind for now.
"What have I done to your daughter?" Her words filled the room, loud with the warmth of her rage, yet cold with a biting and venomous edge. For once she felt no hesitation in using her voice.
Kana took a single step forward, tilting her masked face as she looked down at the woman who had yet to even go see her heavily wounded daughter. The stomping sound of that one step echoed far louder than it seemed like it should. Kana didn't know much about families, but nothing about Fuzō's seemed to have the happiness that the girl still faintly remembered. The wisps of memories of feelings that she felt fading day by day, feelings she treasured and craved,
"What have I, the one who carried her across countries, the one who channeled chakra every day to ease her pain, the one who prioritized her even when many others were dying in front of me, the one who stopped her from succumbing to insanity... what have I done to Fuzō-san?! At the very least, I have been there for her! I- "
I hope her trust that you will be there for her now is not misplaced! ... Kana left that part implicit.
The hissing sound of her own seething breath brought Kana back to some awareness of her senses. The cracks in the wooden slat floor below her brought her most of the rest of the way back.
She'd meant to address the question about her own origins, but that... accusation had been more potent of a distraction than Kana was willing to admit. She... she needed some time to think about that... needed it badly.
Reining in her intense chakra presence to a calmer level, Kana's clothes and hair settled back to relative rest. They still floated a little bit.
With a long and protracted sigh, Kana reached a hand up and slowly removed her mask, tired of the constant doubts and anxieties that pressured her mind. Perhaps she would come to regret this. Perhaps this was her worst failure yet. But surely this had to be the easiest way forward. And Kana was reaching the end of her wits. Enough with trying to be clever when she knew nothing.
For now...
In one hand Kana held her removed mask, the other she extended to the woman on the ground.
Not particularly meeting the woman's eyes, Kana relaxed into her normal, neutral and reserved expression. Now though, her gaze was particularly distant, her resolve tinged with bitterness and apathy. She didn't feel afraid of the two others in this room, nor did she feel particularly well inclined. She just wanted to learn the truth... surely all else could come second...
"Who am I? I came here hoping to answer that very question. I certainly hope that... one of you are willing to assist me."
Kana still couldn't shake off that irritation she felt, and it leaked into her albeit now-calmer voice. It was even worse since she couldn't quite pinpoint the origins of it. She used handle her emotions much better than this too, right..?
At the very least, she was disappointed that things had turned out this way. The only recourse now was to say what needed to be said, do what needed to be done. She had to hold out some hope...
I got an error when posting, so I re-uploaded.
That seems to have made ScribbleHub Very Confused.
Anyway, Please Enjoy and let me know if anyone gets an error as well.
perhaps she had forgotten how to take action
yeah, damn it true, she dosent seems to know how to talk damn it
@Erecc Hasn't exactly had much chance to try before... so yeah, she doesn't really. But she's a child and people will pick up on it enough to help her express herself
@ALowMar Yea, thats right too
I really felt the tension of the stand-off toward the end! It is a little frustrating watching Kana being paralysed and unable to respond in front of new people, but, well, it seems quite in character. I'm a bit like that too, and I was much worse when I was younger. I'm not sure Kana's anxious hesitation comes from quite the same place as mine, but I can relate. Probably makes it even more frustrating in some ways. Painfully relatable.
Thanks for the chapter. I enjoyed it quite a lot.
Edit: I had a typo report here but I think I posted it on the wrong chapter. Whoops?
Glad to hear it!
Good to see what I'm trying to convey is working, even if a bit frustrating.
I keep it all in mind so I appreciate the feedback!
Kana is starting to bug me a bit.
How so, if you don't mind saying?
She's bugging herself a bit, too, if that's any consolation.
Ever felt frustrated at something you said/did either as soon as you said it or when you were about to go to sleep?
It's like that. Except with more irrational emotional buildup and potentially lethal consequences.
She's still a kid, too, don't forget. Even as disconnected from the idea as she is. The girl will be in for an interesting puberty soon as well.
As far as kids in Naruto go, I'd say this much is warranted. Don't worry, she'll look back someday and cringe at her younger self just like anyone else.
I think if you felt something like that, then I might've conveyed the mess that is her mind right now appropriately.
@ALowMar Just her irrational behaviour. She is a bit too paranoid for my taste. I just hope she calms down soon.
@TheOne320 I somewhat agree with your opinion. The story takes place in the naruto verse so paranoia is a necessary thing and I believe her actions do fit what someone who can't trust anyone or someone that does not have any knowledge to rely on could behave like, but I think for the sake of the story and the readers, if she keeps on getting written like she is paranoid of every action, it's going to be boring.
The story so far has been very good but I hope kana starts trusting people and doesn't rely on disguises all the time. Plus, shouldn't a child ( I don't remember how old she was, but if she was under 10 ) seek some sort of comfort? I dunno, but, Author is there something you could tell me so I can understand If there is something that describes why kana is so mature. (Haven't watched or read naruto in a while )
@yeheje @TheOne320
This comment got longer than I thought, so I apologize ahead of time.
It is very much true, and she's paranoid for good reason. She is just someone who must learn (about the world, her own powers, get some answers about her identity) in order to have a basis for trust to be established. I built this up for the payoffs to be more satisfying (for me, but I know what happens). If she has trouble with it, then the relationships she *does* form will be all that much more impactful for her.
(One of my ~secret author secrets~ is that allowing Kana to indulge in her paranoia allows *me* to place her in fun situations to write as well as prevent her from making many of the all-too-familiar cliche mistakes that characters make early in their journey. Instead she gets to make her own, uniquely dumb mistakes.)
Plus, shouldn't a child ( I don't remember how old she was, but if she was under 10 ) seek some sort of comfort? I dunno, but, Author is there something you could tell me so I can understand If there is something that describes why kana is so mature.
> She does seek comfort, but from within herself or her possessions rather than sourced in other people for now. She spent years comforting herself in near complete isolation. Think of her heirloom hair ornament, her meditation/breathing exercises, and more recently the softness of her hair. What other people could she have sought comfort from while within a cell? Kana simply does not know how to entrust her emotional needs to other people right now.
But she is realizing that it isn't *enough*, that she still feels too empty inside. Fuzō has helped her with this more than any of them know. If she hadn't met Fuzō, she might have been much worse off. She sees herself in Fuzō, and her empathy is strengthened for it.
Kana comprehends that her situation is not normal and that what happened to her could have killed her *utterly*. Her emotional struggle and frustration with that pains her deeply, so much so that she pushes those feelings down... leading to unhealthy consequences, and taking strange actions sometimes.
She also does not have a very firm concept of what 'Normal' looks and feels like. She WANTS that. She wants 'Simplicity' and 'Comfort' and 'Normal-ness' *badly*. She also feels like her condition and her power *precludes her from that*. This is unendingly frustrating for her and I *hoped* readers would feel frustrated about it too, just on her behalf.
I think feeling frustrated *at* her as a character is the next best thing. It means I could write a character that could inspire that feeling. Won't that make it feel much more satisfying when she progresses to a point where you can be proud of her?
(This is partly why I have resolved to stick to the pacing I've planned out and still provide the introspection, even if that makes the story not for everyone. I get that, but it's a choice I have to make.)
Making mistakes for Kana feels like a luxury because she has only been able to start making real choices for herself recently at all, after having to *Kill* to *Earn* that luxury. So she tends to be cagey about it, yeah.
She *felt* someone trying to destroy her very soul, something which would prevent her from even moving on to the afterlife (An Edo Tensei for victims of that ritual would fail as a result). The compressed nature of experiencing that has fundamentally altered her as well, both in perspective and priorities compared to a 'normal' naruto-world child. You can imagine that makes one's outlook on life a little bit different for a ~10 year old.
She deals with this disgust at being tampered with, impotent fury at not having been able to do a thing to prevent it up until the very end, and agonizing loneliness from realizing that not one person ever came to help her and that she was on her own with her newfound condition.
So there's a bit of duality to her emotional state. It means she both has a more mature understanding of the world and its horrors by virtue of personal experience, and a relatively immature ability to process those emotions to settle them.
That said, 'Naruto' *does* have Itachi looking, acting, and thinking like a 21 year old while he was 14 (during the Uchiha massacre in canon, yeah he *was only 14*). There are more instances of asymmetrical emotional/mental maturity in canon too. I don't think something like Kana's mentality is all too strange for the world she's in.
I get that this is protracted (can get boring), and I struggle a bit with making decisions about the pacing. Do I sacrifice a lot of the context and nuance I want to show? Do I want to have my characters to feel plausible (in universe, as they are not Isekai protags)? Emotionally invest-able for readers? Do I want to convey how they are feeling more subtly, both by Kana's explicit thoughts and what is implicit within her actions?
It's a balancing act I have little experience with, so writing like this is really good for helping me improve.
Something I do think people underestimate is her first interaction with a few Kusogakure civilians. She was more willing to try then, she came up with a reasonable plan and deception, and she was able to speak without much hesitation. And she watched those three die horribly, burning to death. Immediately followed by a merciless assault on her life once again.
That was her *first time* meeting anyone else for years, and it has colored her perceptions ever since. She got a lot more hesitant with the way she speaks and the chances she takes after that.
Nevertheless, I didn't think too many people would ever read this anyway, so I'm constantly happy and surprised by all the positive feedback I get. Good questions make me happy to write out comments too, so I look forward to those as well.
Thank you for reading and please enjoy!
@ALowMar Alright, like I said it has been some time since I last read or watched naruto so what I based my perspective on was some short clips from naruto ( the original ) when he was 12. I don't believe he acted mature and it was my fault for believing his behavior would be the norm for shinobi at that age. Thanks for explaining.
I just hope that when she grows up, she can have friends and be open about herself ( I hope it won't be her keeping even minor secrets from her friends )
@yeheje
After some encounters and confusions, Kana will meet people she comes to value and treasure dearly, even if she has to be somewhat reserved about revealing entirely what exactly she is capable of. She will show them enough of herself to both convince them of her strength, as well as build trust and real connection. People in similar circumstances might be particularly able to relate to her...
As for a good benchmark for the emotional maturity of 'normal' young shinobi, during the war times like right now, I think the mentality of someone like 13-year-old Neji Hyuuga would be about the average (perhaps with less capabilities).
For times of peace, Sarutobi Konohamaru's 2 side-character friends would be about accurate... just 'normal'
@ALowMar The fact that she has to think for 2 hours for each sentence she says is extremely annoying, and even more so when it doesn't resolve the misunderstandings that she knows exist.
@Codez If you've read this far, the 'thinking' shifts more 'actively' once a bunch of important characters meet up, which is imminent. Since she's so out-of-whack with herself and the world right now, there are a few roadbumps to smooth over before she realizes how to break out of her mindset and make the most of her situation...