28. Reluctant
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Both me and Melissa were eager to talk with Susan when she got home from university that evening, but Sue already made plans to go out that night on business. She just had time to get changed and touch up her hair and make-up before she had to head out again.

The following morning we saw Amber again before class, and of course she'd changed a bit more overnight. It didn't actually seem like she was that different from yesterday though. We knew her transformation was nearly finished, she just had two more days till the whole process was completed. and I figured at this point maybe whatever was left to change was maybe mostly out of sight. She still wore that big oversized hoodie, though it seemed even bigger on her now than it did before.

Then after classes were over, me and Melissa met up with Susan and the three of us did our regular grocery shopping. It was more of a chore than usual since I still had no appetite, so I really wasn't interested in food but I knew we had to get it done. Sue was the same of course, after her hook-up last night she wouldn't want to eat again till Friday probably.

Once we got the food home and everything put away, Melissa heated up a little frozen pizza for herself while me and Sue got ourselves some drinks. We all got undressed and just put on some night-shirts for relaxing around the apartment, then when Melissa's dinner was ready the three of us sat together on the living-room sofa.

As Melissa started to eat I said, "So I've been thinking about this for a couple days now. Actually I guess it's been on my mind on and off since xmas maybe? Anyways, this whole thing where the three of us all have a couple days where we don't eat? It makes it really hard to plan social stuff, since almost every social thing revolves around food."

"Ok?" Sue asked as she sipped her cooler. "So what are you thinking?"

I sighed, "I was thinking maybe we could all try and coordinate when we're not eating, so that all happens on the same days? Like if we're all skipping meals two days a week, let's try and skip the same two days."

Melissa was munching on a slice of her pizza but she asked "So you want me and Susan to plan our liaisons on the same night? And I'm guessing something early in the week is best, like Monday or Tuesday, since that would mean we'd both be eating again by the weekend? So Fridays and Saturdays we'd be able to socialize?"

I nodded, "Yeah. I mean, think about when we're at Susan's place and the weather's nice? We could do BBQs and stuff, but it's not as fun if it's just one person eating. Like now. Or if two are eating then the other's left out."

Susan asked, "What about Lily? Me and Melissa could do what you're saying, but would Lily go along with that too?"

My demon friend spoke up, "That would have worked better if I was still feeding every two or three weeks Mara. Unfortunately I have to do it more often now, and every ten days won't really fit into a weekly schedule."

I relayed what she said to the others then added "I'm just asking you all to think about it, I don't expect everyone to change their schedules immediately."

Melissa nodded, "Ok Mara. I'll think about it, and maybe talk it over with Susan. And keep us posted what Lily says too. The other thing is, if me and Susan are both out on the same night, that means you're here all alone."

"So?" I shrugged. "I'm not a kid, I don't need a grown-up around looking after me."

She smirked, "I don't know Mara. You do tend to get into trouble when you're unsupervised."

Susan giggled but otherwise stayed quiet.

"Hey!" I blushed and pouted. "That's not true. And anyways, I'm never unsupervised. Lily's always here with me."

Melissa smiled, "I know. Sorry, I couldn't resist."

I pretended to grumble about the tease for a moment, before I decided to change the subject.

I looked towards Susan and said, "I think me and Melissa have both been dying to ask you about this since yesterday. Amber said when you had dinner with her family on Monday, you changed yourself to look like her sister? How?"

Susan grimaced slightly, "Ok. I guess this conversation is nearly two months overdue."

She took a deep breath then started to explain, "In return for me becoming part-succubus and working for Lily, she taught me magic that lets me make changes to my body. Sort of like how she taught you to make your horns and tail come and go Mara? Except it's not limited to just doing one thing. I can change all kinds of things. In fact with certain limitations, I could change just about anything."

She continued, "There's a few big caveats though. The first is, everything I do is actually permanent. In the sense that it won't undo by itself, and I can't just easily undo it myself. Any change I make, I have to deliberately undo by making another change."

"The second caveat is each time I do it, it costs some energy. Small changes are easy, big changes are hard. Even before the whole Verothilas thing changed me and Melissa, when I was getting energy for Lily I was also saving a little bit for myself, to power this magic. And the risk is, if I'm not careful I could make a change and run out of that energy, then I wouldn't be able to remove it. I'd have to sleep with someone first, to gain some more energy so I could change myself back."

She added, "That's actually not a problem right now because I've been banking that energy since I first signed the contract. What I did Monday night at Amber's house was the first significant change I ever did. And it was only the second change of any kind. The only other time I used this was at the solstice when I did the antlers and tail."

I frowned, "Why haven't you been using it? It sounds like the sort of thing you'd really love, and I'm not surprised you asked Lily to set you up with this. What surprises me is you haven't been playing with it non-stop since December."

Susan grimaced, "And that's the third big caveat. The thing that's had me kind of scared of it right from the start. Because the changes don't automatically 'undo', I've been scared that if I changed something I might forget how to change back to normal. Antlers and tail were easy to remove. But what I did on Monday? Getting back to normal after that meant I had to remember my eye colour, my hair colour and style, what my skin looked like, the shape of my face, all those details. I couldn't just dispell the change that made me look like Amber and Tracey's sister, I had to consciously change myself to look like me again."

Melissa's eyes widened, "Ok wow. Now I understand why you've been anxious about it. I can see why that'd be scary."

I frowned, "Wait is that why you had me and Melissa help you a couple weeks ago? You were taking all those measurements, and you got us to take a bunch of pictures of you?"

Sue blushed slightly but nodded, "Yeah exactly. I've been trying to memorize my normal self, but all that is reference material incase I forget. So I'll always be able to get back to normal again."

Her blush grew brighter as she confessed, "Monday night when I changed myself back I did it from memory? And it all seemed ok, felt ok. But last night when I was getting ready for my hook-up, looking at myself in the mirror I realized I got a bunch of stuff wrong."

"You did?" Melissa asked in surprise. "I don't remember anything looking wrong with you yesterday. And you look fine now, so I assume you fixed whatever it was?"

I stared at Susan to try and see if I could pick out anything wrong. I couldn't see any obvious differences though.

She was still blushing as she shook her head, "I haven't fixed it. When I changed myself back, I got all my freckles on backwards, and my eyes are reversed. There's some small differences in the colour patterns from left to right? See when I memorized it, I was looking in a mirror. When I changed myself back, I was thinking of that mirror image rather than the right way around. So my eyes and freckles are all mirrored now, and I didn't notice till I was doing my make-up in front of the mirror last night and realized what I'd done."

I frowned and looked closer, then my eyes went wide. "Holy crap you're right! I never even noticed, it's like really subtle? And if you hadn't said it, I don't think I ever would have realized."

Melissa was staring again too as she asked, "So are you going to fix it? Now that you know?"

Susan shrugged, "I don't know. I could, it's a really minor thing to swap them. And like I said, I have a lot of energy stored up. But Lily told me something a few weeks ago that I've been thinking about all day. I've basically been scared to change anything because I was paranoid I'd forget how to change back, or forget what normal was? And now the very first time I really used this magic that's exactly what I did. I did the thing I was most scared of, and nobody noticed. Not even my girlfriends. Not even me. It was all just a huge nothing. I've been scared about this for two months, it happened the first time I tried, and it's just nothing."

I was still frowning as I thought all that through. "So that sounds like a good thing, right? I mean, your worst fear turned out to be no big deal?"

Sue nodded, "Yeah, exactly. Now I'm sort of thinking, maybe I should start messing around with this more often? Maybe I need to just get used to playing around, maybe take a few chances? I do have those measurements and reference pictures after all, if I really did run into trouble I can always get back to normal that way."

Melissa smiled, "So do you have anything specific in mind, stuff you want to try?"

Susan blushed again, "Yeah, there's a few things I want to try. I'm actually a little scared of them though, for completely different reasons."

I offered, "Is it anything we can help you with? Or maybe it's like the other fears, like maybe once you try it you'll find out it's not that scary after all?"

Her blush got a little brighter as she admitted, "It's a little different actually. In this case I'm not afraid I'll forget how to undo things. I'm worried I might not want to. Like if things turned out to be a lot of fun..."

That brought a smile to my face, and I moved my tail around and wiggled the spade tip in the air in front of her as I asked, "You mean like me and my horns and tail?"

Sue laughed, "Yeah, sort of."

Melissa's eyes suddenly lit up and she got a wide, mischievous smile on her face as she said "Ohhhh I get it! You're thinking about trying some naughty sexy changes, and you're worried maybe they'll be too much fun to get rid of later."

Susan blushed again but nodded "Yeah."

"I'll be happy to help you test drive any sexy changes you want to try out," Melissa offered helpfully, though she still had that naughty smile on her face. "And if you feel tempted to keep any of them afterwards, I'll definitely totally probably try and convince you to remove them. Unless they're really really fun."

I grinned, "Me too!"

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