The issue I was facing currently was that there were two groups of bandits, one on each side of this small valley. If I didn’t manage to break their morale right at the start, they could still outright kill the slaves or the elves, as I couldn’t be everywhere at once.
Deciding to not waste any time, I jumped straight forward, in the direction of the bandits before me.
As expected, when a spider the size of several people jumped in your direction, it was bound to shock your morale. Several men dropped their weapons and decided running was better than fighting.
I was sure that the group was already smaller than what I’d faced before. A quick estimation said there were about twenty bandits before me. More than a few were shaking in their boots, which was exactly what I was after.
Using their fear against them, I launched a flurry of magic spells and cast imbue elements on myself. I would use everything I have at my disposal to get rid of them quickly, so I could turn my attention to the other side of the trail.
I would show them such a wide array of destructive spells that they would have no choice but to flee. A cyclone of fire engulfed a bandit, causing him to scream as the fiery winds tore away at his flesh. A spike of ice materialized in the air to my side, which then flew and impaled a bandit who’d chosen to run after witnessing the first spell.
You have killed a Human Bandit: EXP+426 |
Level Up! |
I then jumped in the middle of five of them and brought two of them down to the ground, where they were skewered by my powerful legs. Another scoundrel that stood right in front of me had an earthen spike pierce him from below. He didn’t even get the chance to scream. He died in a matter of seconds. Another rogue human before me got to experience what it was like to be hit twice by a single attack of my legs as the wind blessing triggered. He didn’t live to tell the tale.
You have killed a Human Bandit: EXP+399 |
You have killed a Human Bandit: EXP+421 |
A large boulder was flung at me from afar. I was estimating it to be about three feet in diameter. To block it, I summoned an earthen wall. There was no way it was going to break that.
The rock impacted the wall, and I could feel some of my mana being sapped to maintain the wall’s integrity. I quickly made the wall vanish to focus on what was before me again. I did take notice of where the spell was fired from and saw the older caster standing at a safe distance. He was alone, as the other spellcasters had already fled.
I then unleashed a beam of flames that sprayed over three or four bandits. I channeled the beam and changed its direction, causing it to burn several others alive. In the meantime, the struggling under my legs died down.
You have killed a Human Bandit: EXP+425 |
Level Up! |
You have killed a Human Bandit: EXP+401 |
Elysa, could you not show me these messages now, please?
I normally didn’t mind seeing them when I killed something, but when I was in the middle of a battle I had to focus on, it was slightly irritating.
My spells had the desired effect. The remainder of the bandits ran off with their tails between their legs. I summoned several ice lances and struck them down from afar as they retreated.
Another spell was thrown at me. This time, it was a beam of purple light. It impacted me and drained the strength of my magical barrier. An explosion of holy light occurred around me indicating that half the barrier’s strength had been depleted.
This guy was as experienced as he looked. Both spells that he’d fired at me were quite powerful. I saw him prepare for another spell, but I was swift to summon a fire wall that appeared before me. I then jumped at the old man while the barrier remained where it was relative to me.
I pinned him down to the ground with my two legs and summoned an earthen spike that impaled him in the back, killing him within seconds.
With the biggest threat eliminated, I had no time to lose. I made my way back to the wagons as fast as my legs could carry me. I jumped when I could, to get to my destination even faster.
I arrived just in time. When I reached the top of the hill, I could see the bandits charging at the guards, who’d by now formed a single line on the other side of the wagon to face the only remaining group of bandits head-on. I jumped down and cast my multi-barrier spell again.
As far as I could tell, the guards had moved the bound slaves to the wagons, where they lay bound against the wood. The elves seemed to be working with us. I silently thanked Cellestra and Tavion for getting them to relative safety.
I joined the battle, which was already turning in the elves’ favor. There were about twenty to thirty bandits remaining, but due to the lack of equipment and training, their strength would, in my estimation, be about equal to that of the eight well-equipped and disciplined guardsmen.
With my presence here, this would be over in a matter of minutes, if not seconds.
The elves clashed with the forest bandits. It seemed the humans had either forgotten or misjudged my presence. Either way, it was foolish of them to attack with half of their forces missing.
When I ran up towards the front line of battle from the side, I noticed that one human had already chosen to run. As he was running away from battle, however, a crossbow bolt flew and struck him in the back. He fell to the ground, where I saw him stir momentarily before going still.
The wielder of the crossbow was a man with broader shoulders and, quite honestly, an intimidating visage. Scars adorned his battle-hardened face, which was easy to make out as he was not wearing a helmet. His armor was of equal or even greater quality than that of the guards. The sun was reflected off his polished chest plate, and additional decorations such as golden stars near the shoulders gave it a signature look of quality.
It was most likely stolen.
This had to be their leader. I believe Ingo was his name?
It appeared he was as ruthless as had been described to me earlier. He showed no hesitation in striking down his own. He was in the middle of reloading his crossbow when he laid eyes on me. I could see a certain bloodlust in his eyes, even from afar, but I also noticed the slight shaking that was in his legs. It seemed even the most powerful, or foolish, were not safe from the intimidation factor that I brought forth.
One of the elven guards was struck down by an arrow from afar, as it hit clean in the stomach. Another guard raised his shield for the first soldier who was now on his knees, just in time to block another arrow that would have hit his head.
It did, however, leave an opening in his defense. One of the bandits charged forward with a spear, but missed what he was aiming for. The best he could do in the end was stab the second elven guard in his shoulder before a third guard cut his arms off.
His cries traveled across the battlefield, but were soon silenced as he was decapitated. It was at that moment that my presence became all too clear.
I started casting several spells that had proven to have a huge impact on morale. I first aimed a fireball into a group of bandits near the front line. I missed partially, but still managed to set fire to the ground in front of the guards, effectively creating a dead zone.
Following the fireball, I hit one of the bandits with an elemental blast to the leg. It tore off one leg as the projectile straight up pierced through it, before settling in his other leg, where it exploded, cutting off his other leg and ending his life.
That seemed to be the signal for the bandits to retreat. Ingo fired another bolt at one of the retreating scoundrels but missed miserably. He yelled some commands, but was unable to stop the flood of retreating bandits. In the end, he decided to run as well, dropping his weapon in the process.
I turned my attention to the two injured guardsmen together with Cellestra. Without uttering a word, the elf pulled out the arrow that was in the first guard’s stomach as I pulled out the spear from the second guard. They yelled in pain and started cursing, but quickly fell silent when I cast healing light twice on each of them, mending their wounds.
I turned around to see the bandits running for their lives.
This battle was over.
But I wasn’t quite done yet.
Time to eat!
Thanks for the chapters!
@phraye Savage.
I'd rather eat cookies.
@Faragi Same!
But as I see it as a reader, she either had to A: eat one of them to get a more humanoid form.
B: this is about to turn turn so tragic in a way that I don’t even want to utter it aloud…
So I will just be a good blob, eat my cookies and wait patiently while working on my own book, like I should.
@Faragi 🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍕
To all people complaining (and ranting) about the rewritten 1.1: It's not your story, it's Faragi's story. If you don't like the changes then just write your own. Let the author do their authing in peace.
Aand I'll say it again here, I don't personally believe the changes to 1.1 hold any benefit to the story, I actually LIKED that the gods were direct, capricious assholes, like a certain olympian pantheon, over the almost TOO common "vague mysterious force that will be explained later".... but it's whatever I guess, we'll see how it spins out, for better or worse.
I liked the concept, they sounded like an HOA almost, but I don't think that was a good thing for this story specifically. Asshole gods works if your protagonist is not particularly pious, but here the elves as a whole have a strong belief in Elysa and having her portrayed as basically powerless takes a chunk out of the entire race.
Plus, having gods like this in charge leaves you with the impression that the world is doomed.
@kaithar I mean, again, the Olympian gods had both a hierarchy, and were capricious assholes. You wouldn't see someone like say, Artemis standing up to Zeus. They had their roles, but they also had hierarchy, the Egyptian pantheon was also hierarchal (and seriously wacky in the sh*t they got up to), so I don't see how that really detracts from this story with Elysa being the goddess of a race but also lower in standing than other gods. People still believed in Hades even if he lost the fight for the throne of Olympus and got the sh*t job of watching and managing the underworld.
I also enjoyed their petulance, as it's a break from the 'all seeing, all knowing, perfect in every way' gods of other religions and many, MANY stories both on SH and in broader literature. I don't believe in a perfect god or gods, there is no such thing, nothing can be *perfect* and again, making them capricious assholes, especially IN FRONT of Kealyna, sets them up to be antagonists-in-part to her story, as a motivation to not be f*cked with again, to seek revenge, to help Elysa perhaps surpass them, etc. NOW all we have is "Something went wrong with Kealyna's reincarnation" and since Elysa probably has no idea who exactly did it, at least in the short time she had, that information will not have been passed on to Kealyna, and Kealyna has no line to Elysa to be able to find out so now Kealyna has no idea WHY she is a spider, might POSSIBLY blame Elysa for it, and also can no longer explain to Cellestra exactly what happened to her to get to where she is now, just "something went wrong? Idk?"
It's not a retcon I would recommend, despite the overwhelming hatred of the original chapter for some reason, going back and reading the comments on that chapter really makes me disappointed that people WANT either all powerful perfect flawless gods who never f*ck up or do anything wrong, or vaguery bordering on non-information that will have to be explained in 50 steps somewhere down the line. SOMETIMES, it's okay to just have bad people (or gods) be bad people (or gods), and to do so up front and directly. It doesn't have to be some secret bullsh*t mystery to figure out, and I thought Kealyna's hatred for the gods f*cking with her happy reincarnation was central to her character and her motivation. Removing it fundamentally CHANGES everything about everything Kealyna has done up until now and I don't think it's healthy to be making changes like that so late into a story UNLESS it is a complete do-over.
@RaelDeer easy on the ranting
@RaelDeer Medusa was turned into Medusa because Poseidon r*ped her, on the steps of the temple of Athena she was a priestess at no less, and Athena got mad AT HER for some reason, turning her into a snake haired monster. Zeus turned into a swan and r*ped a woman on one occasion, and several more because he could not keep his d*ck in his pants. Horus decapitated his own mother after she accidentally speared him while trying to help him fight Seth (in some versions, others simply because she took pity on Seth since he was her brother).
Gods are assholes, and they do a lot of f*cked up shit. This is only scraping the surface of their absolute contempt for mortals and even each other.
@Tendo I'm not allowed to express my thoughts on arguably the largest case of "Why authors should not listen to their audience too much" I've seen in recent history?
Easy on the thinking I'll listen to you when you don't even have an opinion or anything resembling a spine.
@RaelDeer I’m with you on this one. It was refreshing to see a “reincarnation gone wrong” beginning where the cause of it going wrong was more upfront. I’m still looking forward to the rest of this book regardless but it definitely will take more chapters (maybe that’s the point ) than previously to re-explain what happened if @Faragi is sticking with what happened originally in chapter 1.1 (or maybe they will go in another direction that they like better).
@Shade177 @Raeldeer
Don't get me wrong. The original god will still be the culprit and he will still be an asshole, but this makes others look less incompetent, and since Elysa doesn't have a direct line of communication
*YET*
it adds mystery as to why, and I can use that for a future arc/events.
@Shade177 Yeah and again it really removes a central point of both her understanding of what happened to her, and her motivations as a character, which leaves a gap I don't really understand how chapter rewrites can fill without adding MORE chapters in between, which again, why would you do that so late in a story unless you were just going to rewrite it, because it basically means you need to reread it as well to actually have any understanding of what's going on. Anybody who from this point on does not start over will not understand anything from now on, and that's only going to get worse as both new chapters come out and old chapters get rewritten, leading to a "3 stories" scenario. You have the original story (what is being rewritten, so everything from 1.1 to 1.95), the new story (the rewritten chapters, or 1.1 so far, and then 1.2 and so on), and the future story (1.96 on, which will rely on the new story for background information, and will have to ignore as many events from the old story as possible) that is, until the new story consumes the old until a point where they coherently form a single narrative again.
I would never accuse an author of wasting their readers time unless it was really bad, and structurally changing your story from the very start almost 100 chapters in (without simply cancelling the project and starting over, separately) is VERY close to being that bad.
@Faragi and that, is the heart of the problem in my opinion. The mystery sucks compared to what we had, and it borders on "generic trope". Sorry, but your audience was wrong and you shouldn't have listened.
I'm being harsh on this because it was unnecessary. Kealyna knew and understood what happened to her, why, and who did it. That gives her understanding, motivation, and a target (or targets). What she has now is.... nothing. No motivation (other than "boy I hope I can see my parents again") no understanding ("why am I a spider what the f*ck Elysa you bit*h how could you do this to me!"), and no target to direct any anger at ("I don't have any idea how this happened or who/what did this to me, it just happened")
And that, is a sh*t story compared to what you have. Her understanding of who did it and why, is KEY to her character and how she interacts with the world, or at least in my opinion as a reader. Taking that from her makes her... not Kealyna.
And I'm just going to add.... it only creates mystery for new readers, which... fine I guess, but for the rest of us? the mystery is already gone, sorry but you can't un-sail that ship, so adding it to future arcs is just adding icing to a cake that has already been eaten and that's kinda garbage.
@RaelDeer Don't get me wrong. Elysa does know a few things, which will be relayed to Kealyna in her first message. One of those things being interference and she mentions Hograd, the only thing that *could* be missing is the WHY, and I'm considering having a possible motivation laid out
@Faragi Sorry Faragi, but I just don't think it's a good move. In my opinion, you had a good setup that actually established who what why and how, in a way that makes sense.
Now you have a generic isekai opener that I've seen on dozens of novels where "oops the reincarnation went wrong guess you'll have to figure out why later" and I just... I can't agree that it was worth it, especially the effort to rewrite your story and successfully JUSTIFY this change that again, I think detracts from what you had, as well as creates the problem of the new story, old story, and future story. Everyone who has read all 95 chapters now needs to start over for a change that wasn't really necessary at this point, in order to understand any new chapters that come out, but will also have to wait for you to rewrite those chapters.
This is what I would call the definition of shooting yourself in the foot, but... what do I know, apparently people hated the gods being assholes like they've never heard of any pantheon outside of christianity which only happens to have a single capricious asshole of a god instead of many.
@Faragi I seriously believe if you are going to go to this much effort to rewrite the story. Then do that. Cancel this version, and start over on a new project. So that at least there's an archive of what was, instead of it being scribbled out and written over.
@RaelDeer
no understanding ("why am I a spider what the f*ck Elysa you bit*h how could you do this to me!")
Well no, she has a clear understanding from 1.1 that it's not Elysa's fault. She also doesn't have the impression of Elysa bring weak and useless. Seems like good changes to me, when the two main characters are both followers of Elysa.
@kaithar Not weak and useless, Outranked. Anyone who saw Elysa as weak and useless purely because she was outranked has never read much about ancient religions or WORKED, like, again, Gods being more realistically in a hierarchy is GOOD WRITING, if all the gods are equal and perfect and never f*ck up or do anything wrong or bad, what do you even have.
And HONESTLY? Elysa not being able to stop Kealyna being pulled into the portal, stop the interference with her portal, or do anything but shoot an information beam at Kealyna, all because of someone who wasn't even in the room, makes her look MORE powerless to me. How does anything about the new scenario make her look MORE powerful???? To us OR in the eyes of Kealyna? "Oh yeah Elysa was going to send me to a happy afterlife but her portal got messed up and she couldn't do a single thing about it, god she's so cool and powerful"
And again, even if they are followers of Elysa... how does her being revealed to being lower in the hierarchy shake their faith? She can't even directly interfere with the mortal realm, NONE of the gods can, so that is such a weak argument.
@Faragi I liked the old 1.1 chapter as it gave Kealyna a clear motivation to “prove them wrong” but I also like the new version as it makes Elysa seem less powerless (as was said in the comments) and adds further things to use for the future (again, as said in the comments). Unfortunately, for anyone who read the old 1.1 chapter the mystery has been already spoiled as @RaelDeer said and that can’t really be undone. Still, I’m really looking forward to what you have in store for us readers.
Also, If you want my opinion, maybe you could stop temporarily with new chapter releases that will reference the new events until you get all of the edits and rewrites put up. Then make some kind of announcement stating where the edits and rewrites are so people can go and read all of the new events before going on to the new content. That way you could possibly avoid this 3 story situation that RaelDeer mentioned. Again, this was just my opinion on how you could go about adding the new content. Feel free to ignore this if you already have something in mind.
@Shade177 this arc is almost at an end, I will finalize all changes then before posting arc 2
@Shade177 I really, really don't understand how she looks any more powerful than before. in fact I'd say she looks MORE powerless, like I said in my most recent comment.
Old Version: Superior gods to her show up, start f*cking with the reincarnation portal in front of her, she can't say anything due to hierarchy (sounds pretty realistic to me) but slips Kealyna a benefit before she jumps through the portal on her own
New version: Her portal gets messed with by someone who isn't even present, and cannot do anything to stop it even as Kealyna is being pulled in despite her struggling, and the best she can do is hand laserbeam her blessing at her before she goes.
Yes, much more powerful seeming.
@RaelDeer I was typing that comment before you made you comment. I'm typing on an iPad rather than an actual keyboard.
And to answer your comment I kind of see it both ways. I can see how this new 1.1 makes Elysa seem more powerless but I can also see traces of that hierarchy by sort of reading in between the lines. If Hograd is higher in the hierarchy than Elysa then he must be more powerful than her right? Maybe he takes advantage of Elysa putting enough of her attention on Kealyna and her reincarnation/transmigration that he secretly alters the portal as the goddess is distracted because he is simply more powerful than her. That could even explain why she looked shocked and surprised when the portal changed. Which I guess in a weird convoluted way of thinking that makes her seem slightly more powerful as in the old 1.1 as she couldn't do anything but do something sneaky.
@Shade177 the hierarchy hasn't changed. The transitions and behaviour of the other gods was an issue in my opinion
@Shade177 Doing something sneaky in front of FOUR more powerful or higher ranking gods belies a much more significant amount of guile and ability than "OH NO SOMETHINGS WRONG AND I CAN'T STOP IT UHHH BLESSING BEAM GO"
@Faragi There's the heart of it. So you didn't like writing realistically mean-spirited, capricious, power abusing gods that see mortals as a subject for playing games with more than anything else.
Got it.
Since you repeatedly said they were never coming up again.... why did you even bother. Now they HAVE to come up again. But now they're not even directly mean, and not even in a group, it's just one guy who decided to be a d*ck for now unknown reasons, which I would consider, infinitely less compelling as a plot device, and just outright insulting to read.
You expect me to believe that a higher ranking god took time out of his day to f*ck with a single reincarnation for an unknown and from what you've said, only SPECULATED reason by Elysa, and we should care about finding out now WHY? Will the gods now play a bigger role? Was he trying to stop her from playing a big part in something? Or was he still just being a d*ck because he didn't like her/wanted to use her for entertainment?
Because if that's the case, finding out it was just because he didn't like her, or it was for entertainment, further down the line, is going to be SUCH a massive letdown of an answer. A 100% "That... that's IT???" moment. and if it's not that, then what, was he actually trying to help? does he have some destiny planned for her that she has to learn about later? That's such a cop out.
@RaelDeer interfering with another's believers like a whiny child demanding to have their way is not hierarchy. Ancient religions tended towards hierarchies because their societies were so strictly stratified, smaller counts have considerably less need for such things in reality, which leads to the trait you're trying so hard to ignore: combative power structure.
You want to complain about her not being able to instantly identify and counteract external tampering on a realm crossing portal? I thought you were against omnipotent and omniscient gods?
This obsession with allowing "more powerful" gods to go around f*cking things up is very much your personal opinions being projected onto other people's works. Your idea of theology isn't a binding absolute that must be the only way things can be, anymore than the well known ancient religions can speak for every religion to ever exist. Particularly since the main pantheons all had some form of gods having children and marriage to produce that hierarchy.
Gods are not humans, applying human constraints and behaviours to them is flawed anthropomorphic thinking.
@RaelDeer
You expect me to believe that a higher ranking god took time out of his day to f*ck with a single reincarnation for an unknown and from what you've said, only SPECULATED reason by Elysa
Compared to multiple of such gods taking the time out to attend in person and argue about a single reincarnation because of petty differences in opinion?
@kaithar
1. You've never worked at a company with more than one manager, have you. That is exactly Hierarchy. Also, Faragi confirmed the Hierarchy is still in place, oops.
2. No, I don't want to complain about her not being able to immediately identify and stop the interference on her portal, I don't understand how her inability to do anything, as opposed to sneaking in a blessing under the noses of four gods, makes her look more powerful, not less, as people keep saying "Oh she looks less weak and powerless now".
3. Obsession my ass, who's projecting now? I have never said they were 'allowed' to do it, just that they CAN and WILL do it, that is power, and if there is no check or balance, then even more so.
4. Gods may not be humans, but are you saying they are above human emotions? Then why are they still so mean spirited as to turn her into a spider? What are the motivations? I can't imagine they'd be pure, and yet Hograd has no reason to spite her. Spite is human after all, and Gods are beings that cannot be anthropomorphized apparently. So he must have some grand plan for Kealyna now instead of his actions being purely selfish and mean spirited.
Your argument is flawed and has no belief behind it. What do YOU believe the gods should have been then? Do you believe there should never have been interaction with the gods at all? That Kealyna should have simply woken up a spider with a "Sorry" note from Elysa? You either have Perfect Beings above human emotion, or you have flawed gods with human emotion, there is no in-between.
RE: your second reply - At the very least they made their intentions for being there very clear. They had been watching her. They either genuinely didn't like her (less likely) Or wanted to f*ck with her for fun (more likely). And they wanted to do something to make her reincarnation more entertaining for them to watch (more likely) or teach her a perceived lesson (less likely).
Now, we have a God with unclear intentions, turning her into a spider for no reason, without warning, and without ever stating a reason why she should not get the second life Elysa believed she deserved. And again. If the reason remains the same, that they didn't like her purely because of her actions before death, then what. That's it? we have to wait who knows how f*cking long to find out that she was turned into a spider for no greater reason than a whim? Wow, I am so excited for that big reveal that her life was f*cking ruined on a thought so small the f*cker couldn't even be bothered to show up in person. At least before she got the courtesy of looking him in the eye as he ruined her happiness for selfish reasons, and up front, not finding out a month, two months, a year or perhaps longer into her reincarnation.
@RaelDeer
You didn't properly read, I was addressing your obsession in general.
You are the one ranting about how your version is good writing and realistic while complaining that other versions are not.
You are the one claiming that we can understand the full relationship and motives of these various gods from one short scene.
My opinion and approval ate largely irrelevant to how things should be simply because it's not my story. I'm not about to lecture an author about something this minor and especially not over something that is a valid plot choice. As a reader, we can offer feedback and opinions on the novel. We should not order the author around or insult them for disagreeing with our opinions.
You are not the definitive source of fictional theology.
@kaithar "Criticism is not valid if I disagree with you"
And yes, that's my opinion, I believe, in my opinion, that, in my opinion, the old version was better. I have never said it was FACTUALLY better. I claimed *I* could understand the relationship and motives of the gods from that interaction (DISCLAIMER) IN MY OPINION (DISCLAIMER), and if you couldn't, well I am so sorry for you that it, in my opinion, went over your head.
If your opinion and approval are largely irrelevant, then shut up. Never criticise anything, never express interest in anything, never LIKE anything. You said it yourself.
I can absolutely tell an author their choice of plot replacement is inferior to what was. There is no reason I can't. And if Faragi takes that on board, great, if not, fine, their choice to do so. I do not order authors around. I offer MY OPINION, and I will continue to do so even if they have excuses or reasons, especially ones that I believe, IN MY OPINION, fall flat.
In my opinion, I may not be a definitive source of fictional theology, but I've read enough good, bad, and mediocre stories involving gods, godlike beings, and mysterious otherworldly forces claiming to be gods, to point out the failings and successes in them.
In my opinion, you have balls, but also in my opinion, you're a pseudo-intellectual sycophant. But that's just my opinion.
@RaelDeer you, like 2 hours ago.
Gods being more realistically in a hierarchy is GOOD WRITING
You might want to reread the comments you posted over the past few hours if you don't think you're being aggressive and demanding.
Again, and this isn't specific to this one case: The author is not your monkey, their novel is not your novel.
@kaithar yep, that sure is me expressing my opinion. So what if I was aggressive, are you the tone police?
Never told Faragi they need to change it, I told them I thought it was a bad choice. If they are dead set on it, oh well, maybe it will look better next week, or maybe it will look just as bad (in my opinion don't forget) as it does now.
You're the only one here likening authors to monkeys, and you know what, you know what monkeys do when they get upset? Yeah you do, so even your analogy falls flat under 2 seconds of scrutiny.
You say all this assuming one massive thing. That were I writing a novel, that I would not be exactly like I am now. If you have an opinion, share it, if I think it's a bad opinion, I'll say so, and if you actually manage to make a good point, I'll consider it. But guess what, that last one? Doesn't apply to you. Try making a good point for once.
All you've done is tell me why my opinion is wrong, and that I should watch my tone. So go ahead, do you even have backing to your opinion as to why this is better? Or are you just saying it's better because it's what the author decided.
@RaelDeer I'll slap a heater in the mouth if he doesn't quit running that lip off, bit*h who you calling spineless when you're trying to be a Rudolph ripoff.
I didn't even bother to look at the rewrite of C1, simply because I'm not interested in seeing that shit
@Tendo wtf is going on here monkaS
Also, chapter 2 got updated too
@RaelDeer
I forget the original formulation but the meaning is that authors are not some kind of performing monkey of old for you to lecture or tell them how they should write their story. I rather thought the basic idea would come across, it's not exactly cryptic.
And I'll say it again, this is not your novel. When you start writing long posts citing Greek mythology as proof of your opinion, it should be evident you've gone too far. Which setup is subjectively better depends on how it connects and relates to the rest of the story.
But no, I'm done with this thread, find someone else to have a pissing contest with.
@kaithar okay so I'm wrong and my opinions are bad, but you have no opinions to stand by, cool. Do not ever show up again to tell me my opinions are wrong when you don't even have the spine to present your own, you absolute cunt.
@Tendo spineless little coward hiding on the internet running his little mouth off with snide little comments, and then posturing like the tough kid on the playground when it doesn't have the intended effect. f*ck off cunt.
@RaelDeer you talk a lot of sh*t for a donkey wearing diapers I heard you some brains so where was it during this syfer cuz all I hear is a troll with no discipline.
Trash like you can't be in my class cause school is closed
@Faragi gotta dumb prick who thinks all the fart it's letting out is of more significance than the author
@Tendo Man I blocked your ass and never woulda seen this had oofman not said anything, so I thank them for letting me know you're that f*cking cringe you're, what, rap battling by yourself? Nice freestyle, rap god, maybe you'll get signed.
I won't see your reply, so don't bother.
@RaelDeer
@RaelDeer I see your head is still stuck up your arse... Did you make any progress fitting your shoulders in so you can further develop your knowledge of depth?
@kaithar dayum
@kaithar oh Hi d*ckhead who firmly believes people aren't allowed opinions, grow a spine yet? Find some convictions? Or are you still a squirmy piece of sh*t that has nothing to stand with or by?
Well, that's odd... I'm sure I posted a reply to the self-important tit and now I don't see it. Annoying.
@kaithar this went from debate, to argument, to 2 10 year- old yelling at each other. just block each other and shush
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm what did I just read? a debate?????? But of what