Staying low, Shun crawled to the window and tried to get a glimpse of their pursuers. 

 

The carriage was traversing on a narrow dirt path that led to a dense forest a few miles ahead. In the distance behind, he could see the smoldering ruins of the city gate and trails of smoke. 

 

Wait, where are they?

 

“S-sir, not behind, below!”

 

Below? He leaned further out and realized that the dirt path actually ran alongside a valley. “But I still don’t—”

 

The massive billowing cloud of dust and mud on the horizon caught his eye. From within, the leader of the cavalry emerged—followed by ten Pacifists dressed in black hooded capes. 

 

“Don’t let them get to the forest!” The Leader rapidly shouted orders upon spotting the carriage. “Follow me to the high ground!” 

 

E-EHHHHHHH??!

 

Shun turned around. “Rya, this—” 

 

She shook her head weakly. “I-I can’t activate my necklace now. My life force…I need to recover it first.”

 

Dam*it, how does magic even work in this world? Why didn’t that stupid Goddess tell me sh*t about this?! 

 

-zzzzshhaaaaa

 

A loud high-pitched whistle penetrated his senses.  

 

“SHUN, GET DOWN!” Rya grabbed his shoulders and pushed him away from the window. A split second later, the flaming arrow landed on the floor and burst into flames.

 

He backed away from the sudden heat. “T-that was close…”

 

“No, they weren’t aiming for you.” She hastily stomped on the arrow, but the fire had already begun to spread. “Get something to stop it!” 

 

Shun frantically glanced around at the mess on the floor. What can I use…what can I....wait, that book! He grabbed the heavy tome and began smacking out the flames with it.  

 

“What are you doing?!” she cried. “That’s the divine—”

 

“Divine, my a*s!” He threw the scorched book on the floor furiously after putting the fire out. “This sh*t—eh?”

 

Rya was also dumbfounded as the book suddenly opened and flipped to a new page all by itself. “W-what does it say?”

 

“...that’s what I want to know too.” He picked it up and hastily skimmed through the page. 

 

“Out of life force to activate magic and need to recover it in under three seconds? Simply shout out loud: “Please tie me up and **** me, Rya-chan!” I need to hear it from wayyy up here!

 

As a bonus, I shall give you a tip on how to defeat the Pacifists in one easy step! So, what are you waiting for?” 

 

Shun snorted just from the sheer ridiculousness of the text he had just read. “Y-you f*cking useless goddess…”   

 

He did a facepalm and faced a confused Rya. “I’m really, really sorry for this, but PLEASE TIE ME UP AND **** ME, RYA-CHAN!!!!”

 

Even the din of the carriage seemingly died down in that instant. 

 

She blinked in utter surprise. “...e-eh?” Her face suddenly reddened and she took a hasty step back. “W-w-w-wait, what did you…?”

 

“That’s what this f*cking s*ck-my-c*ck a*s book told me to do, I swear!” He avoided her shocked gaze and quickly glanced through the page again. A new line had been added at the bottom: 

 

“Thanks for adding to my schadenfreude~ 

 

Oh, that’s the tip. Tell Rya to activate her magic and say “schadenfreude”. Do remember to pronounce it correctly!”

 

T-this…she’s really just f*cking with me right now, isn’t she??

 

“Rya, I need you to say…” He saw her disgusted eyes and quickly placed his arms in a surrender position. “I-I’m serious, that’s what your Goddess ordered me to say to recover your life force!” 

 

“...” She glared at him and folded her arms. “And? What do I need to say?”

 

I-I thought she was going to slap me there. “Uhh, you have to activate your magic and say this English-but-actually-German-in-disguise word which is Schaden—”

 

Suddenly Shun caught the unmistakable sound of hooves pounding the dirt.

 

“F*ck, they’re behind us!” He grabbed the rifle from the floor and quickly perched it atop the windowsill. The hooded figure of the Leader a few feet away, along with the rest of the cavalry, greeted his sight. 

 

Seeing his head poking out, the Leader immediately grabbed his crossbow from his back and aimed at Shun with one eye closed. 

 

Too slow. By then he already had the Leader’s head lined up in his iron sights. Even though this is a blank, it should still hurt if I fired it directly at such close range.

 

Without hesitation, Shun squeezed the trigger first. 

 

A sharp crack numbed his eardrums. The muzzle flash momentarily blinded him. Blinking to clear the dark spots in his vision, Shun ejected the spent cartridge and worked the bolt hurriedly. He leaned out and aimed again—but the cavalry had already stopped in their tracks, their horses too spooked by the gunfire to continue.

 

Is that it? Shun squinted his eyes at the panicking men, trying to search for the Leader. 

 

A flash of motion caught the corner of his eye.

 

“Sh*t!” He spun his rifle around and blindly fired the last shot. The crack of gunfire tore through the air, but the Leader spurred his horse forward regardless and caught up with the carriage. 

 

In that instant, their gazes met. 

 

From within the cloak, a gleaming pair of crimson-red eyes bore into Shun—the fervent bloodlust that burned within the Leader made him stiffen instinctively.   

 

The Leader straightened his back and shook off the hood of his full-length cloak. 

 

Caught by the howling wind, her long silvery hair flowed out behind her once she revealed her face. “...aren’t you going to shoot me?” 

 

Eh?

 

W-wait, the Leader…is actually… 

 

Shun was instantly fixated on the petite silver-haired girl. Her face, slightly flushed from the chase, was as smooth as a child’s. Yet, the unsmiling look in her eyes made her seem much more older than her appearance might suggest. Beneath her cloak, she wore a loose-fitting black sleeveless dress that accentuated her snow-white skin—something which he thought was a bold choice for riding a horse. 

 

Before he could react, however, she pulled out her crossbow in one swift motion and aimed it slightly off-center. 

 

Shun realized her intention too late.

 

He recoiled from the window and dashed towards the unsuspecting Princess.  “RYA!!”

 

“Wait, it’s Schadenfreude! I—” Her voice was cut off by the deathly screech of the crossbow. 

 

With a sickening squelching noise, the quarrel pierced through his skin and cut right into his backbone deeply.  

 

It didn’t hurt as much as Shun expected, but a sudden dizziness clouded his mind as he slammed face-first onto the floor. The noise of his surroundings—Rya’s scream, the stomping of horses, the silver-haired girl’s cry—swam round and round his head until he blacked out.

 

Message from Goddess - Schadenfreude is pronounced shan-dun-froy-duh~ isn't it such a beautiful word?

Author: That doesn't mean you should indulge in it...