* Rosario+Vampire: Rosario To Vampire

Whistler and I faded into existence beside a deserted road. It was a really weird way to travel, like ceasing to exist and then coming into existence. On the positive side, the transition from one world to another in the middle of that was instantaneous and my powers hadn't shunted me on ahead. That would have been awkward.

“I'm sorry we had to yank you out like that.” Whistler said and pulled an envelope out of his pocket.

“Yeah, I get it.” I said. “At least they didn't erase the reality and start it over again.”

Whistler's face paled and he dropped the envelope. “Wh-what?”

“I had that happen once. I made a lot of changes in one world, all for the better, and the overseer of that instance erased it from existence because I interfered too much.” I said and then smiled. “I killed him before he completely erased me.”

Whistler took a step back from me and looked horrified. “He... he...”

“Snuffed out billions of lives because I annoyed his sense of justice? Yes, he did.” I said and bent down to pick up the envelope. “What's this?”

Whistler took several deep breaths and composed himself. “You're technically still a teenager, so those are enrollment papers for the high school and an ID for this world, in case you need it.”

“High school? Really?” I asked and opened the envelope and read the papers. “Yokai Academy? A boarding school?”

“It's a place for all the misfits and oddities that can't... or shouldn't... be in a normal high school.” Whistler said and I chuckled. “You have to admit that you always meet new and interesting people. We're just giving you a bit of a leg up.”

I put the ID in my pocket and folded the papers to store them. “Well, since I don't know anything else about where you sent me, it's as good of a plan as any.”

Whistler smiled. “That's a great attitude. You're going to do fine.” He said and then looked thoughtful. “Just for the sake of things, you should tell them you can do magic and maybe use a wand or something to cast.”

I raised my eyebrows at him. “Is it a magic school?”

“Kind of. They do offer classes on magic and a few other things. You'll fit in a lot better if it's obvious what you are.” Whistler said. “You might make friends quicker, too.”

I mentally shrugged and created a black Hogwarts uniform robe and slipped it on over my normal clothes, then made a matched wand and slid it into a holster on the inside of my left arm for an easy draw by my right.

Whistler nodded. “A bus will be by in about ten minutes and it will take you to the campus.” He said and started to fade as he waved. “Have fun making some replacement friends!”

I immediately felt anger at that stupid comment and whipped out the wand. “BOMBARDA!”

Whistler took the full blast right in the chest and screamed as he blew apart and his remaining body parts finished fading away.

“Thanks for reminding me of the relationships you forced me to give up, asshole.” I said and sheathed the wand. I stood there and waited to see if anyone was going to show up about me doing that, and no one did.

At about the ten minute mark, I heard more than saw the sound of a bus. It was a neat effect, because the school bus seemed to fade into existence as the sound grew closer. I had a smile on my face when the bus stopped right in front of me and the doors opened.

“Cool effect, isn't it?” The undead bus driver asked and I nodded. “On an unrelated subject, he kinda deserved that.”

I chuckled and climbed on. “I knew it wouldn't kill him. People like that are like cockroaches.”

The bus driver chuckled, too. “Just another quick stop and we'll head to the campus.”

I sat on the front seat. “Do you get a lot of dimensional travellers?”

The bus driver smiled and closed the door. “More than you'd think.” He said and then gave me a look. It wasn't quite pointed. “Fair warning. The other students are going to be weird. Don't attack them unless they attack you first.”

I knew he was being serious, so I nodded. “That sounds fair. Retaliation is something I'm quite good at.”

The bus driver put the vehicle in gear and we drove on for another ten minutes and we shifted to another dimension for several seconds and then shifted again and we were suddenly at a corner of a subdivision. The bus came to a stop and the doors opened to let an atypical Japanese teenager board.

He sat down on the other front seat and hadn't even looked to see if there was anyone else on the bus. The doors closed and the bus drove off down the street.

I didn't try to talk to the guy, mostly because Whistler told me to. I learned a long time ago to not latch onto the very first person I met on a new world, unless I knew something about what was going on. I had no clue about anything this time and would have to look around before I made any rash decisions.

The bus ride was surprisingly short after another dimension shift as we went through a tunnel under a bridge and appeared in a pocket dimension. I felt the difference and suspected it was created specifically for the oddities to be away from normal humans, since it was a boarding school and not a day school.

The words 'forcibly sequestered' ran through my head as the bus came to a stop in front of a grove of trees that looked like it came from a cheesy horror movie.

“Just follow the road and you'll be fine. I'll be back every month at this same time for mail deliveries until school ends in ten months.” The bus driver said and opened the doors to let us off. “Try to not get into any trouble.”

I felt that last comment wasn't directed at me, for some reason, even though it was me that should be warned. At least, I personally thought so, anyway. Then again, I could handle myself in pretty much any situation and the other guy was as normal as normal could be. In fact, I was pretty sure he was so normal that he was going to stand out in a school full of abnormal people.

We disembarked from the bus and it drove off. The other guy started walking and I watched the bus as it faded away. I hadn't felt anything while on it, so maybe it was just an external effect? We did cross several large spaces, since I was sure I wasn't in Japan when I was dropped here and then we picked up a Japanese student. It was a hell of a lot better than the Knight Bus from Harry Potter.

I shrugged mentally and followed the other guy. The forest really was ominous and spooky, which reminded me of when I was in the Scooby Doo universe. It had way too many similar areas and I chuckled at the memory. The guy turned his head and kind of glared at me, only it didn't have any heat in it.

“I'm as lost as you are here and I'm following you.” I said with a smile.

The guy looked surprised for a second and then chuckled, then he laughed.

“Yep, exactly what I was thinking.” I said and he kept laughing as I reached him and we walked side by side.

We walked on for about twenty minutes before a tiny bell sounded behind us. I was sure it was a bell from a bicycle and we both turned to look. The bicycle hit the other guy and the girl was thrown from her bike and into me.

Being the gentleman I was, I easily caught her and swung her around to come to a stop beside the crumpled form of the other guy and the bent bike. I also gained the image for 'Hidden Vampire Princess - Clone Version'.

“Are you okay?” I asked, not specifying who I was talking to.

“M'fine.” The guy mumbled and tried to push the bike off.

“I'm okay.” The girl with long pink hair said and her eyes locked onto mine. “Thanks for saving... me... from...” Her gaze changed from apologetic to hunger as her eyes went red. “You smell really good!”

I saw her eyeteeth extend into fangs and she hissed as she grabbed me and lunged for my neck. I wasn't an idiot, so I did the only thing I could. I created a wooden stake between us and she impaled herself on it as her mouth neared my neck. She stopped moving with her fangs touching my skin and she made an odd sound before she let me go and stumbled back, looking down at her heart being pierced.

“Oh, no.” She said and the cross hanging from her neck glowed red as she changed from a pink-haired teenager into a tall woman with long silver hair. She also released enough power to cause winds to ruffle everything within a hundred feet. “Fuck.”

I watched as she seemed to wither and waste away, her power reducing to nothing, and the mummified thing dropped to the ground and stopped moving.

“What the hell was that?” The guy asked, finally getting out from under the bike.

“That was a vampire trying to get a free meal without asking first.” I said and reached down to touch her. I received a second image of 'Mummified Vampire - Undead' and it only needed fresh blood to bring it back to life. Oh, and the stake had to be removed. I wasn't going to allow that and tossed her into Azkaban.

“Where did she go?” The guy asked.

“Who?” I asked and stored the bike to get rid of it later.

“That girl that hit me with... her... bicycle?” The guy looked down and didn't see anything.

I took out my wand and cast a healing spell on him. “Come on. The assembly should be starting soon.” I said and started walking down the road again.

The guy was shocked at what I did and followed me anyway. He kept looking back at the spot and looking at me.

“If anyone asks, you didn't see anything.” I said and he looked surprised. “I doubt anyone is going to, since we don't know anyone and no one knows us.”

The guy nodded and looked a little fearful as we walked the rest of the way to the academy grounds.

“Relax. If I was going to get rid of you, you would have been gone already.” I said casually and he looked startled, then he chuckled.

“Yeah, I guess you're right.” He responded. “My name's Tsukune Aono.”

“Hansen.” I responded.

“Just Hansen?” Tsukune asked.

“It saves me from having to keep two names straight when moving through different cultures.” I explained and he looked thoughtful, then nodded. Having only one name definitely reduced the confusion.

We reached the academy and joined the crowd of people waiting to get in to the assembly hall. There were all kinds of people standing around and chatting with some of them in specific groups.

I couldn't help categorizing them like I did in Buffy's high school and easily picked out the jocks, the nerds, the cheerleaders, the popular kids (both male and female), and all the rest. I ended with the last group, the lowest of the low, the newbies... of which the first years and myself and Tsukune were members of.

Just like my first day back in Sunnydale High School, one of the jocks took notice of us and assumed we were easy pickings. A nearly seven foot tall jerk led over a small entourage and he grinned down at me. Tsukune made a sound like a panicking squirrel and ducked behind me.

“You don't want to do this.” I warned the idiot and knew he was going to ignore it.

The tall blond moron started to pontificate. “Listen, new guy. This is my school and...”

I whipped out my wand and transfigured him into a four foot tall troll and a foot of that was his bright bushy green hair. It happened almost instantly and I was quite happy that magic worked so well here, so I also made it permanent.

“You... what...” The troll squeaked at me and then clutched at his own throat at the kiddie voice he now had. “I'm going to tear off your head and spit down your neck!”

I gave him a disbelieving look as everyone around us laughed. “You can barely reach my dick to jerk me off. How are you going to reach my neck?”

“I'll show you!” The troll squeaked and his skin changed to a sickly green and he grew... about an inch and tusks popped out of his distorted mouth. That was it. All the students around us were laughing hysterically now.

“Yep, I'm impressed. Great transformation.” I said and patted him on top of the head. “You're a cute little brute.”

The orc swatted my hand away and growled, only it came out like a purr. Everyone laughed harder.

The doors to the school opened and distracted everyone from what happened and we all shuffled into the school and followed the directions to the assembly hall. We easily found seats and I saw a lot of approving looks from several of the students, most of them girls. Apparently, the jerk had been a real playboy and hurt a lot of them with his antics.

I smiled and nodded to each of the girls. Some of them giggled and others blushed and nodded back. Since I pretty much expected that reaction from the girls, I changed my focus to the teachers gathered on the stage. The headmaster of the school stepped forward and gave a speech about this being a monster academy and that they all had to stay in their human forms or they would be expelled.

Tsukune sitting next to me seemed to shrink in on himself as the man explained that any humans that managed to get onto campus would be executed immediately if they were discovered. So, I did the only thing I could do in that situation. I pulled out a vial of the reworked Miracle formula with magic infusion and examined it.

It was even more effective here, probably because of the pocket dimension allowing all kinds of magical and physical transformations. I had no idea what it would do to a baseline human and I didn't have time to experiment, because a few of the other people were starting to sniff the air and complain they could smell a human.

In order to save the only human there, I changed the vial into an injection gun and quick as a flash, injected it into Tsukune's neck.

“Ow!” Tsukune gasped and slapped a hand on his neck. “Something just bit me!”

This immediately gained the attention of everyone, the teachers included, and Tsukune realized he just did exactly what he didn't want to do.

“S-s-sorry for interrupting!” Tsukune said and stood, bowed, and sat back down. He was sweating now, almost excessively.

I watched him and used several discreet diagnostic spells to monitor him. I couldn't take the chance of using Eye or even a modified Tricorder, because it would be easily noticed by everyone paying Tsukune so much attention.

“I... I don't... feel so well.” Tsukune whispered and his skin changed color from a healthy pink to ashen grey.

I was mentally keeping track of the changes and I had to admire the formula's ability to modify the human to become the best vessel to house it. Since it wasn't limited like it had been in the last world, I was sure the changes were going to be quite interesting.

Tsukune's hands changed slightly and his fingernails became retractable claws, two small white horns grew on either side of his forehead, and a pair of small black bat wings popped out of his back.

That kind of threw me off, because the formula wasn't supposed to do that. It would take me a few hours to figure out what went wrong with the thing, until I realized that Tsukune himself must have had something either locked away or he had the potential to become something else and the new formula was using that to build on.

After several minutes, Tsukune's sweating stopped and he took in a huge breath and let it out, then the wings and fingernails retracted.

“Are you sure you're all right?” The headmaster asked.

Tsukune smiled. “I've never felt better, sir.”

The headmaster smiled and continued his speech. When it was over, we had guides to lead us to our dorm rooms. It was no surprise to me to be roomed with Tsukune, since we were the only two transfer students admitted to the school.

“Are you okay?” I asked and he nodded as he sat down on his bed. “No lingering soreness or a headache?”

Tsukune caught on to why I was asking. “It was you! You stung me!”

I nodded and sat on my bed without correcting his assumption or telling him it was a needle and not an actual stinger. “As soon as the headmaster warned about killing humans as soon as they were discovered, I had to hide you.”

Tsukune looked scared and then sighed. “What did you do to me?”

Should I lie or tell the truth? Maybe a mix of both? I asked myself and then chose. “As far as I can tell, what I injected you with has interacted with your latent genetic structure and combined to give you some hidden traits that will let you fit in with everyone.”

“You... you made me...” Tsukune stopped talking and looked at me. “I'm a monster?”

I couldn't help it and laughed until he looked upset. I eased off and reached over to pat his shoulder. “No, you're not. You've gained abilities far above a normal human, like limited super strength, an enhanced mind, agility that will make the best athlete jealous, and you can run as fast as a car.”

Tsukune stared at me with his mouth hanging open.

“You see, it's not your abilities and looks that makes you a monster, it's what you do with them.” I said and quickly explained the difference between looking like a monster and acting like one. When I used the orc as an example of what a real monster was, Tsukune finally understood.

“I swear I won't use my powers for evil or to bully people.” Tsukune promised me.

I smiled and sat back down. “Trying to not be an asshole is all anyone can ever ask of you.”

Tsukune looked thoughtful and then smiled. “How hard has that been for you?”

I was surprised by the snarky question and laughed. “Sometimes it's unbelievably hard!”

Tsukune laughed with me for a bit and then sighed. “I hope I can keep up with classes. My marks have been horrible and no other school would accept me.”

I grinned at that. “You have nothing to worry about, Tsukune. You've had an increase of about 50% to your IQ. If you were average before, you're at the cusp of becoming a genius now.”

Tsukune gave me a wide-eyed look before he closed his eyes and fell silent.

I stayed silent as well and let him think things through. I was sure that his mental capacity wasn't average at all and that he was either lazy or someone had convinced him that he wasn't smart, so he believed he wasn't and didn't try to change that. I didn't bother trying to peek into his head to check for myself and waited patiently.

“I am an idiot.” Tsukune said and opened his eyes to look at me.

“Not anymore.” I reassured him.

“No, not anymore.” Tsukune said with a smile. “Thanks, Hansen.”

“There's no need to thank me.” I said and laid back on my bed to relax and put my hands behind my head. I couldn't resist teasing him, though. “Also, you didn't blow up like the last guy, so I'm calling it a win.”

Tsukune made that scared squirrel sound and fainted. I laughed pretty hard and drifted off to sleep.

*

School life was the same, no matter what the world it was in and who attended. It was almost relaxing, honestly. Being a teenager again wasn't so bad, especially when I remembered being with Gloria and then Dawn. The pleased smile I had on my face had gained me a few admirers, too.

The succubus gathering her reverse harem was funny, too. She kept trying to entice Tsukune and myself into joining, which neither of us were interested in. Me because I had different requirements for a relationship right now and Tsukune because he was completely oblivious to the machinations of girls. I tried to enlighten him once and he just looked at me in confusion, so I dropped it.

The little witch that was ostracized and picked on by most of the students, reminded me of Luna Lovegood, so I did what I could for her without her noticing. When her bullies disappeared without a trace, she continued her pursuit of the prettiest girls in school and fawned over them, declaring them goddesses and even giving them food tributes.

It was a surprise to no one that the girls allowed it and secretly enjoyed it.

*

Having to join a club was mandatory, for some reason. It wasn't like we didn't have enough student interactions during the day and then in the evenings and nights at the dorms. It was explained as keeping special interests and causing distractions, so students wouldn't get caught up in their monster desires for death and destruction.

I wasn't allowed to start my own club, which sucked. How was I supposed to spend time in my lab if I had to spend my time at another club? It was annoying and also a requirement, so I chose to take Tsukune's suggestion and joined the newspaper club.

It was almost funny that I stumbled onto it, because the club made me a reporter and gave me the right to approach anyone and introduce myself as I pretended to research a story. I shook everyone's hand and easily found all of the bad people... bad monsters... and chucked them into Azkaban. I didn't bother making magical clones of them, since removing them was better than replacing them.

I published a lot of controversial stories that brought to light a lot of secrets that no one wanted published, especially the teachers and the headmaster, because it cast the school in a very negative light as a place to harbour and build evil factions. They shut down the newspaper and disbanded the club, which freed me from my official obligations.

It didn't take much to establish an independent newspaper with copied equipment and the unofficial newspaper club was back in business, to the happiness of all the previous club members. Needless to say, we dug out everything, cleared out the evil infecting the school, and brought a lot of attention to ourselves.

The school year ended with us finally revealing the existence of the evil organization Fairy Tail and the names of all their members, some of them high ranking monsters from all over the world. It brought the hidden monster society to its knees, too.

Even the father/husband of the vampire that attacked me on my first day, was essentially a part of it, because he was one of the Three Dark Lords of the Monster Underworld. I say was, because he is now in mummified form and in Azkaban with his daughter. No one gets to chew on my neck... unless she's female and we're having sex. I needed to have some leeway in my self-imposed restrictions.

In other words, I hunted down the other two Dark Lords to keep the balance and dealt with them and put them in Azkaban, too. I wasn't going to allow them to try and resurrect their vampire god Alucard, who was not the Alucard from the story I knew called Hellsing. They just had the same name, powers, and reputation. Go figure.

I cast a permanent unbreakable spell on the barrier containing the spirit of the vampire god under the school and that was that. Yokai Academy was closed and everyone would need to be relocated to another academy in another pocket dimension, essentially having to start their lives over. We weren't allowed to keep our illegal newspaper club, either.

So, I decided it was time to move on, despite the fun I had. I hugged the girls in the club and shook the hands of the guys, all good friends, and none of them were more than that. I had felt I wasn't ready to get into a relationship with anyone and only stayed friends. Before I left, I gave them presents to help them along in their new lives and they each thanked me and left.

“You're really moving on?” The headmaster of the old academy asked me.

“There's not much more for me to do.” I said and gave him a smile. “You've got tenure, so what are you going to do?”

The man chuckled. “I'm going to pull a Hansen and go on a walkabout for a few years to poke my nose in everything, then I'll find a nice witch or succubus to settle down with and start on the next generation.”

I laughed. “Yeah, that does sound like me.” I walked over to him and shook his hand.

The man gave me a searching look. “Don't you have a last minute gift for your old headmaster?”

I grinned and let his hand go as I stepped back and tossed him an invisibility cloak. “Here's one of the tools of the trade for sneaking around.”

The man gave the cloak a very piercing look and then laughed. “Of course you can make yourself completely undetectable! Ha ha ha!”

“Have fun.” I said and covered myself in magic energy combined with Chi and disappeared.

* Tenshi Muyo: Ryo-Ohki

I hadn't considered factoring in what traversing within a pocket dimension to another world could do to my trip. Apparently, it let me go directly into another pocket dimension within that universe. It was an odd thing to discover, especially considering the way I usually expanded my lab to work on various projects.

My magical senses were reversed here, for some reason, so I had to assume it was a factor of the dimension itself. I thought about reversing it and chose not to, since I didn't know what the consequences of doing that would be. My detection spells gave back weird readings, too.

I sighed and turned around, only to see the walls were kind of stone and there were odd pillars everywhere. The room was huge, almost like a throne room, and at the far end was a dais of several steps with a weird and quite large metal apparatus on top of it that held a giant crystal. The soft glow from it didn't tell me anything about it, though.

I doubted any of my electronics would work properly here, so I walked over to the thing... only to pause as two of the columns nearby started to morph and change. I wasn't an idiot, so I took aim with both palms and shot both partially transformed columns several times with Ki blasts. It reduced them to rubble and I shot the rubble, too.

I walked on and two more of the columns started to morph. I sighed and took the proper pose. “Kaaaa... meehhhhh... haaaaa... meehhhh... HAAA!”

The blast hit the first column and I used the Force to turn it and hit the next column, then the next and the next, reducing each of the surrounding columns into dust with the last ending my attack. I heard a light tinkling from the crystal and ran over to look, only to gasp at the sight of a four foot tall girl with huge messy red hair suspended inside the thing.

The large gold amulet she wore had the remains of two small stone snakes crumbling around it. That must have been whatever was controlling the stone columns, which meant they were defenses to keep people away from the crystal. I reached out and touched the thing, only to gasp as our minds briefly touched. Not only was she alive, she was conscious and begged me to let her out.

I agreed and stepped back to ponder the problem. Since I was in a pocket dimension with a kind of reversal theme, that meant my normal means had to be adjusted for the reflected effect. I didn't want to shatter the thing and possibly kill her, so it had to be more subtle.

A small smile grew on my face as I thought about what happened to crystals when subjected to high frequency sound waves. Since this was a reverse or mirror dimension, low frequency sound waves would be just the thing to crack the crystal shell.

I pulled out a few things from inventory, mostly tools and supplies, then took the risk to recreate something I needed. My Hummer. Thankfully, it didn't explode or appear turned inside out and was only reversed in where the driver's side was. I gained a mirror image of it and it counted as different than the one I had, so I kept it.

I climbed into the vehicle and worked on the stereo system to add an amulet to power the thing, then I added the boosters I needed to the speakers. With a few important adjustments, the rear hatch opened towards the crystal, an adjusted and boosted subwoofer was added for the bass, all that bass, and I was set to go.

Now I just needed the right song to play. I chuckled and created a compact disc of AC-DC and slid it into the suped-up stereo. I chose the right song from the menu and hit play, then cranked it and ran.

“THUNDER!” Da da da daaa da da daa daa. “THUNDER!”

The entire room shuddered and shook as the vehicle bounced on its suspension and blew out all the bulletproof glass. I laughed and had to hold my hands over my ears and heal myself several times as the song played and hit those great notes. I watched the crystal as it also shook and vibrated, because it was getting nearly the full blast of sound.

The first crack in the surface appeared when the chorus of the song started and I dove for the Hummer. I managed to reach in and hit the off button at the perfect time to turn and look out the back of the vehicle. I couldn't hear the large cracks spreading across the crystal and healed my ears again as I climbed back out and walked over to the dais.

Several loud snaps later, the girl spread her arms and the crystal holding her shattered. She yawned and stretched, looking a little cute, then she spoke in a grown woman's voice.

“Thank you, John. You're a good man.” She said and stepped down off the dais.

“You're welcome, Washu.” I said and motioned around the pretty much wrecked room. “Can you tell me where we are?”

“We're in the reversed world in orbit of the nearby planet. This ship has two layers. It has a top and a bottom; but, the intersection between them is one way, and that means in order to get back to the real world, Kagato has to be dealt with on the other side. He controls this dimension and we're stuck here until he lets us go or he's killed.”

I thought about that. “How long have you been trapped here?”

“Only a thousand years or so.” Washu said with a shrug.

That made me pause. “You don't sound eager to leave.”

Washu smiled. “Well, I do have a mental connection to my daughter and can see things through her eyes. She's a space pirate right now and is slowly working towards getting here, thanks to some mental prodding.”

I blinked my eyes at that. “You... huh. How long until she figures things out?”

“I assume another eight hundred to a thousand years. There needs to be a few generations of births before she finds someone to help her change her ways and become worthy of the path I've set her on.” Washu said, a bit proudly.

I glanced around the room and she waved her hand and erased the rubble and dust. “Handy.”

“Yes, it's my prison. Am I powerless here? No.” Washu said and gave me a pointed look. “You can hang around and spend time with me if you want; but, you're not getting into my uniform to see what's underneath.”

I was surprised by the vehemence. “I wasn't thinking about...”

“You're not now. You will later. In about thirty years.” Washu said, confidently.

I opened my mouth to refute that, then closed it. If she grew up by then, I suppose I could see her as a potential bed partner. The brash attitude was kind of a turn on, since it was similar to Isabel Rochev's from the Arrow universe. She was definitely a hard-ass and absolutely fantastic in bed. She wasn't too caring or loving, though. She had been too hurt to open herself up like that, even to me.

“I see you understand my reasoning.” Washu said with a nod.

“It's more like I accepted it.” I responded. “The thing is...”

Washu tilted her head slightly to give me an inquisitive look. “What?”

I smiled at her with my best smile. “I'll be fully grown in only a few years and I think it's you that's going to have to resist.”

Washu looked surprised for a moment, then laughed. “I doubt it, John.”

“We'll see.” I said and my smile became a teasing smirk. “We'll see.”

*

After four years of us working together in my recreated and reversed lab, I had adjusting everything I could to remove damage and shield things from dimensional distortions. I couldn't install shielding tech into every piece of technology I had access to, unfortunately, so a lot of the smaller things were left unprotected.

Washu had eagerly helped me with everything, loving the fact I could do a similar thing to her and create things with an energy to matter conversion power. She learned a lot of new things, easily integrated them into her own technology, and shared her discoveries with me.

Almost out of the blue, Washu changed into her very sexy adult form, which I had no clue she could do, and she tore off my clothes and took me right there on our shared workbench. Apparently, proving I was smart enough to keep up with her own intelligence and trains of thought, turned her on immensely.

At least, that's what she yelled when she had several screaming orgasms.

When I introduced her to molecular circuitry and spent about a year getting the factory to work inside the reversed dimensional distortion, Washu swore to have my baby using her own ovum and not an artificial one. She did refuse to have one the normal way, though. She did that once and it destroyed her emotionally when the father and his family took the child away from her because she wasn't of royal blood.

When I asked if she killed them all, she gave me a very conflicted look and cried. I held her for several hours as she told me the whole story, then about how she eventually tracked them down and couldn't remove her toddler son from the only home he had known for years.

“After all these years, you still can't take revenge, because your son's genes have propagated through at least a dozen generations and spread out through the whole family.” I said in understanding.

Washu wiped at her eyes and looked into mine. “You really do understand.”

“I've been in a similar situation. Kids, grandkids, great grandkids, and so on and so on. When it reaches a certain point, especially with regeneration technology, you're all about the same age and can take over an entire town. When everyone you know is related to you, it's a heavy thing.”

Washu nodded. “You moved on.”

“I usually do when there's nothing left for me.” I said. “I can even make the same joke as you do when I go to certain planets. I'm older than the dirt.”

Washu laughed and hugged me, then kissed me, then we made love. She tubed the fertilized egg a week later and stored it. Neither of us would condemn our daughter to hundreds of years of isolation, even if we ourselves were used to it.

*

Nine hundred years later, Washu warned me that our time together was coming to an end. The newest Tenshi was being brought to confront her old student by her daughter Ryoko and we would soon be freed. Well, she would be. I couldn't be here for the conflict, or it might not work out for the better.

I wasn't sure why that was; but, after spending all that time in a casual relationship with her older self, I wasn't going to question her. I was going to miss her teasing me while in her younger form, though. It was hilarious when she would try on different oversized sexy outfits and walked around in heels too big for her. We both laughed hard every time she toppled over and cursed at herself.

We cleaned up everything and put the place back to the way it was, then I set her back into the crystal forming matrix that we had repaired decades ago. Washu pulled me in and gave me one last kiss, this time in her child form. She smiled at my shocked face and closed her eyes as she activated the mechanism.

“Little minx.” I said and stepped back as the crystal prison formed around her smiling face.

Letting them save her was a part of her plan and I wasn't allowed to interfere, so I wasn't going to. I gave the place one last look around and the entire ship shuddered. I had to leave with the attack under way and couldn't step out of the dimension first, because that would alert the villain and he would know that someone else was there.

With no other choice, I covered myself in magic and Chi, long since adjusted for the dimensional shift, and I disappeared just as a tall ditzy blonde faded into view with a glowing pink cube in her hand.

* Monster Musume: Everyday Life With Monster Girls

I appeared at night on a normal street in a normal suburban neighborhood. I glanced around and was slightly worried because of that. It was completely normal. Nothing obviously stood out and even magic detection spells couldn't tell me anything. It was unnerving. I was reluctant to take out Eye, in case he died a quick death, and took out several pieces of technology as sacrifices instead.

When nothing happened to them, I relaxed and put them away and took out Eye. “Hey, buddy.”

“Beep.” Eye said and he started searching for me. After ten minutes, he spoke. “Boop.”

“We're on Earth? Really?” I asked, a little surprised. I changed my clothes to be more appropriate for the local area. Plain black pants and a tight white t-shirt. “What about the internet?”

“Beep beep.” Eye answered.

“Huh. Full swing and it's 2015.” I said and glanced around again. “Where are we, anyway?”

“Boop.” Eye told me.

“Of course we're in Japan on the other side of the world from where we usually show up.” I said with a laugh and checked on the Force and it was particularly strong. “All right. Check to see if there's a house for sale nearby. We haven't lived here before, so we might as well make a go of it with nothing else happening.”

“Beep.” Eye said and showed me several options.

“It might later? Yeah, I figured so.” I said and he beeped. I chuckled. “Good enough. It has enough privacy to let us get to work and I can expand it. I won't be converting the lot, unfortunately. A farmhouse would stand out way too much in a place like this.”

“Boop.” Eye said, a bit sadly.

“Don't worry, my friend. Once we get the satellites checked over and launched with the harvesters, the upper orbit of the planet will get cleaned up a lot and you'll have remote access to a bunch of things.” I promised and he beeped happily.

I followed the directions and walked towards the house for sale. It fit in with the neighborhood and didn't stand out, which was exactly what I wanted. I didn't want to draw unwanted attention to myself and walked across the small front yard and opened the door. It was an open house, which would have been odd, if there wasn't a gorgeous real estate agent showing a young couple the living room.

“As you can see, this room would be ideal for a couch, a television, and a playpen for your little one when they arrive.” The short woman said with a fake smile.

She's going for the hard sell, considering how late in the day it is. I thought and leaned against the doorway as I crossed my arms. I was tempted to say something, then decided to wait and see if they would notice me.

“I don't know. This is a little above our price range and it's a little smaller than what we expected.” The young man said.

“We can convert the third bedroom into an office and save on taxes and space.” The young woman countered and a hand lightly caressed the slight bulge of her belly. “We're running out of time to find a place bigger than your apartment that's still affordable.”

I slipped into the kitchen and used one of my gold jewels to generate local currency. An explosion of currency appeared around me and I caught it with the Force and created several counting machines and set them for Yen. A minute later, I had 15,000,000 (fifteen million) Yen and made a case big enough to hold it. It was just over 100,000 US dollars worth and that seemed like enough for a decent house.

Eye checked for me and it was around 40,000,000 Yen for a single family home, which shocked me. I had to make two more cases and I sighed, because it was awkward to try and carry three metal suitcases filled with money. I slipped back through the house and stepped outside, checked to make sure no one was looking, and created my Hummer to put the cases in the back.

I went back inside the house and saw that the real estate agent was looking pretty frazzled and the young couple looked like they were on the verge of giving in. Why was I going to intervene? The current situation was convenient and I didn't want to bother going to another neighborhood to look for another house or wait for a different real estate agent to eventually show up.

“Is financing your only problem?” I asked in perfect Japanese and all three people jumped and whirled around to stare at me, completely startled. “I apologize.” I said and bowed with respect. “The door was open.”

The real estate agent waved a hand at her own face to calm down and tried to hide how flustered she was. “It is all right, stranger-san. It is an open house for another twenty minutes.”

I smiled at her and bowed again. “Thank you for your forgiveness.”

She blushed and turned to look at the young couple. “The backyard is a nice size for the area...”

The young man waved her to silence and gave me a pointed look. “Why do you care if we can't afford this place?”

“I don't care if you can afford it.” I said and looked at the young woman that was pregnant. “I care if she is deciding to settle for less on her future family home.”

The young woman blushed and the young man put an arm over her shoulders.

“It is disrespectful to hit on another man's wife.” He said, angrily.

I couldn't resist the challenge and walked into the living room. He became very protective of his wife and I ignored him as I approached the real estate agent. “My name is Hansen John and you are one of the prettiest women I've met. Would you join me for a meal and perhaps some conversation? I am interested in buying this house immediately and would like to know how to do that.”

The real estate agent blushed hard and looked faint as her hand sped up to keep a breeze on her red face. “Oh, my.” She whispered and looked at my tall muscular body. “Oh, my.”

“It is very disrespectful to cut someone else off from making a deal!” The young man spat.

I turned from the flustered agent and smiled at his wife. “I apologize for cutting in like this. I just thought I could give you an excuse to find some place better and then compensate you for the inconvenience.”

The young woman blushed again. “You would... why would you...”

“Like I said. You're looking a home to raise a family in. I can't stand by and let you pick something you won't be happy in.” I said and motioned to the doorway. “My vehicle is parked outside and I brought the funds with me.”

That made the young man's eyes light up. “Show us immediately!”

I could tell he was greedy just from that and mentally sighed at the idiot. I was sure that he was going to squander the money and not actually use it for buying a house. He would try to elevate himself in the eyes of his friends and family instead. I did a quick check with a touch of Legilimency and sighed. The reason they didn't have a lot of money was because he had been gambling a lot of it away.

I waved at the door and the man let his wife's shoulders go and ran outside. His wife looked embarrassed and I took her hand and bowed over it, placed a light kiss on the back of it, and smiled at her epic blush. I didn't tell her that things were going to be extremely better from now on because I was going to replace her husband with a magical clone.

I used the Force to touch him as I walked outside. I made him disappear and then replaced him in an instant. No one would have noticed if they had been looking and I waited for his wife to exit the house before I shook his hand in a friendly manner.

“I'm so happy you've chosen to accept my offer.” I said loudly and then whispered. “Please change his behavior so that people start liking him. You can use this as an excuse to give up gambling, since you feel like you used up all your luck with this.”

“Yes, father.” He whispered back and let my hand go to wave to his wife. “Honey, you're not going to believe this! We lucked out!”

The wife looked embarrassed and then sighed.

“No, no! Not like that!” He said and laughed nervously. “Mr. Hansen is giving us enough money to buy a much better place and we won't have to worry about you taking the year off after having the baby!”

“Smart.” I whispered and opened the back of the Hummer and added another case of money.

“We might even get a place big enough for your mother to have a room of her own.” He added.

“Don't overdo it.” I hissed and he laughed nervously again.

“We'll talk about it, at least.” He said and his wife stepped close. He hugged her and motioned to the metal cases. “I think 60,000,000 Yen should be enough to last us a while.”

Both his wife and the real estate agent sputtered and looked shocked.

“It's all I brought with me, since I only just arrived.” I said with a shrug and took out each case and stood them at the young couple's feet. “I'll have more delivered later for my own home purchase.”

Neither the wife nor the agent knew what to say about that.

“Let's get these to the bus stop. We can call this agent tomorrow for another listing.” The husband said and picked two of the cases up.

“Bus stop?” I asked, confused.

“We live in an apartment complex with no parking.” He said. “We were waiting to buy a house before we looked into buying a car or a motorcycle.”

It made me rethink my plans for transportation as I looked at my Hummer. If traffic was heavy all the time, this thing would be stuck in traffic all the time.

“Then contact me as soon as you find a place and let me know what you want to have for the family.” I said and they looked surprised. “I'm helping you have the best start for your family. I can't do anything less than that.”

“Th-thank you.” The wife said and bowed. “Thank you very much, Hansen-san.”

I waved it away. “I'm kind of stealing this house from you, so there's no thanks necessary.” I said and patted the husband on the shoulder as I added a comm badge and a stun gun to his pocket. “Be careful with the money and don't let anyone know that's what's in there. Wait until you're home to check it and I'll send over the paperwork of where the money came from.”

“Thank you, Hansen-san.” He said and bowed. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” I said and held out my hand to the wife. “Goodnight.”

She blushed as she gave me her hand and I kissed the back of it. “G-goodnight.”

I waved as they walked away and the real estate agent stood beside me to watch them. When they were out of sight, she turned to me and looked both nervous and full of anticipation.

“You mentioned joining you for a meal?” She asked, boldly.

I smiled warmly at her and led her over to the passenger side of the Hummer and helped her climb up. She looked amazed at the interior and I walked around and climbed up into the driver's side.

“Do you have any preferences?” I asked and drove away from the house that Eye marked on the GPS map.

She gave me a smug smile. “Whatever you planned is fine.”

I barked a laugh and she giggled. “I need directions to the closest sushi and ramen restaurant.”

She opened her mouth to do so and Eye beeped.

“Thanks.” I said and looked at the directions. “Fifteen minutes isn't bad, assuming there's no traffic.” I said and hit several buttons on his screen. “They take reservations? Okay. Half an hour.”

“Beep.” Eye said.

I sat back with a nod and drove on as the real estate agent gave me a very odd look. “May I know the cute lady's name?”

Her odd look disappeared and she looked embarrassed, probably because she just realized she had climbed into the vehicle of a complete stranger. “H-H-Hasanagi R-Rei.”

I couldn't help but laugh at the obvious lie. “It's all right. I'm buying that house from you, so we're going to spend a few hours together over the next few days as we finalize the sale. I want to move in right away and I pay in cash, so no financing or mortgaging is needed.”

She blushed at the reminder. “That should ease the paperwork.”

I nodded and kept an eye out. As it so happened, the traffic became thick and we had to slow down. As we came to a traffic light, there was a car dealership off to the right. With a liberal application of the Force, I touched a wide variety of vehicles of all kinds. I would modify a few of them after I bought and fixed up the house.

We came to a stop at a nice restaurant and I parked as well as I could with a vehicle as large as the Hummer. I took up two normal parking spaces and I received several dirty looks when I climbed out. I couldn't tell if it was because the thing was so big or because they were envious that I could afford to buy something like it.

Rei looked embarrassed on my behalf as I helped her step down to the pavement. She didn't say anything about it and took my hand instead. The silent support was appreciated and I leaned down to give her cheek a kiss. Now she was really embarrassed and she ducked her head to avoid everyone's gaze.

I led her by the hand inside the restaurant and said I just made the reservation. We were brought to a table and given menus. It didn't take long for Rei to recover and she ordered a nice rice and fish dish. I ordered the same and added a large platter of mixed sushi for the table that we could pick at.

Rei looked pleased at my order and we started talking about the house and the brief history of the lot. It wasn't a new build and was recently renovated to try and bring in more interest. The problem was, the previous owners were ambitious and divided the space up too much to appeal to single people or couples. It was a family home, only it was too small to allow much growth.

It was perfect for my needs and I could expand it as much as I wanted. I doubted I would need more than one room to change into a lab, though. I could probably get away with expanding the other rooms a little to made the square footage a more appealing sale, only I didn't plan on ever selling the place.

Eye should have set up a bank account for me already and forged the paperwork for the money, so I wouldn't have to worry about being accused of theft or running a crime ring. That thought made me mentally laugh, because I could do that if I wanted to. I could flood the country with weapons of all kinds and it would plunge the place into outright war between the gangs, the Yakuza, and the police.

It's a good thing I'm not evil, isn't it? I asked myself and concentrated on the conversation with Rei. I was sure she would eventually tell me her real name. Eventually. Maybe. She seemed to like the food, at least.

*

I stayed in a hotel for three days as the paperwork was finalized for the house. Even without the financing part, it still took a mountain of paperwork to put the sale through. Foreign nationals had a lot more scrutiny to go through and Eye had quite a lot of fun blocking their inquiries and redirecting things to ping off of his own portable server.

That was something Washu and I had come up with during our time together. Instead of relying on local services and co-opting them, I should create my own and have that be where everything went to instead. It saved Eye a lot of work on older systems that he deemed unworthy of his time, so it was a win-win all around.

Not surprisingly, Rei wasn't interested in anything romantically inclined. I had made her too nervous after showing up out of nowhere and throwing money around like it was candy. She didn't explain why she didn't want anything to do with me after our first date and I didn't ask. I wasn't going to try to convince her otherwise after failing with that first impression.

I left the hotel and dropped off a small economical car, modified of course, and two Vespa scooters at the young couple's new home and wished them well. They promised the middle name of their coming baby to me and I felt honored and promised to stay in touch. I left there and picked up the keys from the real estate agent and signed the last paper to take ownership of the house.

With that out of the way, I went to my new home and got to work. Just because it was a nice home for the area, that didn't mean I wasn't going to change things to make myself comfortable. Better bathrooms, updated electronics, security systems, replaced furniture, and new appliances. Using the Force and my other abilities, I was done a day later and relaxed in my home.

*

Three years later, the government made an announcement that shocked everyone. Mystical beings were real. Centaurs, harpies, lamia (snake people), mermaids, and every other kind of animal humanoid mix that could be thought of, were real and would start to be integrated into normal society.

I sat on the overlarge couch in front of my wall screen television and ate popcorn. “I told you they would announce it eventually.”

“Beep beep.” Eye countered.

I chuckled. “Yes, you still won the bet. This is a year later than I thought it should have happened.”

“Boop?” Eye asked.

“Hell no! I'm not signing up for the program.” I said and ate some more popcorn as I watched the press conference and they used a cat-girl as the main example of the mixed species that were available.

“Beep!” Eye said as he floated next to me.

“Yep, they're idiots. Everyone is going to request a cat-girl and will refuse the more exotic races.” I said and finished off the popcorn. “It's going to be a mess as they work out the problems with their ass-backwards way of doing things.”

“Beep.” Eye commented.

“Ha ha! That's the government for you. Inter-Species Cultural Exchange Act, my ass. They just want to stop a species war before it starts.” I chuckled. “I can't wait to see what stupid laws they pass, now that the secret's out.”

“Beep.” Eye agreed.

I turned off the television. “Hey, Eye. Do you want to play another game of null-ball before we head next door to Hitoshi's for his son's birthday this afternoon?”

Eye beeped happily and his drone slid a paddle out of the side and another slid out of the other side.

I laughed at him modifying himself like that. “I can't even claim that's cheating, since you don't have hands.”

Eye beeped smugly at me and turned on the holodeck as we went into the third bedroom.

*

Three years later, I was outside trimming the hedges when a large transfer truck and a black SUV that was blatantly a government vehicle, pulled up to the house next door. I had seen a bunch of them on the television as delivery trucks for the luminals, or beings that couldn't fit under a single classification (like horse or humanoid).

I quickly finished my work and walked around the short fence I had in front of the house and leaned against the corner of it to watch what happened. I also cast a notice-me-not, just in case.

“Beep?” Eye asked me over the open comm signal.

“No, you're right. He's not one of the official recipients.” I whispered. “Can you check...” I paused as a tall pretty woman with long black hair stepped out of the SUV and walked over to the back of the truck's trailer with a clipboard. She wore a nice suit and dark sunglasses that would have been more appropriate on a spook of the government... and then I realized that was exactly who she was.

The back of the trailer opened up and my eyes widened as a quite pretty and very long lamia slithered out of the container. She had long red hair and her scales were bright red. She wore a modest outfit on her human half and her bottom half was about fifteen feet of scaly snake.

“I'm pretty sure a snake that size could crush steel.” I whispered and Eye quietly beeped.

The pair went over to the front door the the neighbors and the agent knocked. It opened to reveal a 17 year old male and he looked thoroughly confused.

“Hello, Mr. Kusagi. Here's your sanctioned Luminal Exchange Participant.” The agent said, her voice full of fake cheer.

“You know, if I was a complete pushover and easily manipulated, I would fully believe she was sincere.” I whispered and Eye beeped at me.

“Uh... well... um...” The young man named Kimihito Kurusu stammered. “Well, come on in, I guess.”

“Beep?” Eye responded.

“Yep, she planned it.” I said and watched as a group of workmen entered the house after the agent and snake woman with piles of materials to alter one of the rooms inside for her. “She must know his parents are abroad for an extended period of time, considering they only left a week ago.”

“Beep boop.” Eye agreed.

“They leave every time they renew their contracts. It would be easy to plan around that.” I said and thought about it. “Eye, go ahead and check to see if the name she gave is getting the Luminal Suppliment Income Assistance without having an actual rep show up. If he is, switch it to Kimihito. He's going to need the money.”

“Beep.” Eye said and started working on it.

“Thanks, buddy.” I said and stayed there to watch and wait. I couldn't approach until after the agent left, mostly because I didn't want to give away that I was there. If she knew I was a single guy staying right beside one of their choices for their exchange program, whom was also a single guy, they would drop a luminal off to me 'by mistake', too.

Two hours later, which was pretty good for a work crew to make the appropriate modifications for a snake woman to stay in a normal house, the workers left the house. They must have only done the bare minimum for the cold-blooded individual that relied on external temperature regulation.

I stood there and watched the very smug female agent leave the house and climb into the SUV. The driver drove off and the work crew entered the transfer truck before it followed the SUV. I waited another minute and dropped the notice-me-not before walking next door. I created a basket of unfertilized acromantula eggs, each the size of my fist, and rang the doorbell.

The door opened and a very frazzled Kimihito stood there. “Oh! Hello, John.”

“Hi, Kimihito. I saw that you had a new houseguest and I brought over a welcome gift for her.”

Kimihito smiled at me and rubbed the back of his head. “Heh. Yeah. I guess. Thanks.”

I chuckled. “Invite me in and I'll give it to her.”

“Right! Come on in.” Kimihito said and waved me inside.

I stepped in and kicked off my shoes. “Arigato.”

“You're like family, John. Mom's been harping about being able to relax with you next door to keep an eye on me while she and dad are gone.”

That made me laugh. “They are going to be surprised when they hear about this.”

Kimihito laughed, too. “Not as surprised as I was! I didn't even know I had signed up for it.”

I didn't remind him that he hadn't. “I suppose the contracts were a pain to go through?”

“The stack was this high.” Kimihito said and held his hands six inches apart.

“Ha! That's government for you.” I joked and he laughed as he brought me down the hallway and up the stairs.

“Her room's right here on the right.” Kimihito said and knocked on the door. “Miia, are you busy?”

“No! I'll be right there!” Miia said and we heard slithering, then the door opened and there she was, her top was off and she showed off her massive breasts. The bright red nipples really stood out on her pearly-white skin. “AH!” She gasped and covered her breasts with her hands. “You're not alone!”

“This is my next door neighbor, John. He came over to meet you.” Kimihito said, completely ignoring Miia's blush at exposing herself to me. “He brought a welcoming gift, too.”

Miia looked at me with a mixture of anger and resentment, as if I was keeping her from something. I was, because the nature of Lamias was to seduce any potential mate for themselves and their clan to become a communal husband. Their birthrates had dropped significantly when the government stopped them from kidnapping men to breed and now they had to hunt for mates the way normal women did.

“I heard they're delicious.” I said and held out the basket of giant spider eggs. “They are soft-shell and easily eaten.”

Miia's distrust grew and she slithered backwards with a frown on her face.

“Miia? What's wrong?” Kimihito asked.

“I can't accept a gift of food from a stranger.” Miia lied.

“John's not a stranger. I've known him since I was eleven years old.” Kimihito said.

“He's a stranger to me.” Miia responded.

That made Kimihito frown as well. “You're not being a good neighbor, Miia.”

Miia looked shocked that he would talk to her like that.

“It's okay, Kimihito.” I said and patted his shoulder. “You can't force her to be friends with me when we only just met. I'll see myself out and I'll try again another day.”

Kimihito turned and gave me a smile and a nod. “I've got work tomorrow, too. We still on for the weekend?”

I nodded back. “We always meet some nice people at the park when we have a picnic and bring enough food to choke an elephant.”

Kimihito laughed. “I almost had a heart attack when that harpy swooped down and snatched away my sandwich last time!”

“The blonde hair and feathers were odd, weren't they? I thought they only had odd colors like that green one we saw in the distance.” I commented.

“I think there's a lot more around than what we see if they take after other birds.” Kimihito agreed.

“Ha, no doubt.” I said and handed him the basket. “The eggs aren't fertilized, so don't worry about anything hatching. If she doesn't eat them in the next few days, bring them to the park and we can leave them around the place in the bushes. Someone will snatch them up.”

“Thanks, John.” Kimihito said, gratefully.

“You're welcome.” I said and turned to Miia and bowed slightly. “It was nice meeting you.”

Miia didn't say anything in response and her mouth changed from a frown to a flat line.

“See you later, Kimihito.” I said and walked back down the stairs. I put on my shoes and left the house and cast a notice-me-not on myself as I stayed there and listened.

“That wasn't nice, Miia.” Kimihito said.

“He saw me naked!” Miia exclaimed.

“John's not like that.” Kimihito said in my defense. “He'd have been all over my mother if he was.”

“Excuse me?” Miia asked, clearly shocked.

“I told you that John's like family. She's so relaxed around him that she walks around topless when she's home.” Kimihito said. “She says it's to make up for having to wear a suit all the time. I just think she itches from clothes and strips off whenever she's not outside.”

Yep, easily manipulated. I thought and held in my laugh. His mother is an unrepentant exhibitionist and loves having a man that's not her husband looking at her with lust. She also has great breasts and I didn't mind looking at all.

“That... that's...” Miia stopped talking and sighed. “I'm sorry.”

“It's okay. John's a nice guy. He won't give up trying to make friends with you.” Kimihito said, completely misunderstanding why Miia was sorry. “I'll get lunch started and you can finish your bath. It'll be ready when you're done.”

I had to chuckle at that and walked back over to my house. Kimihito assumed Miia was topless because she was going to take a bath and not because she wanted to show off her assets to him. What was it his mother called him? Oh, right. Lovably clueless. That definitely fit his personality to a tee.

Kimihito was right, though. If his mother wasn't married, I would have been all over her and she knew it, which was another reason why she enjoyed me ogling her. It had really spiced up her sex life and she loved that, too. So did her husband, which was why I had been invited over so much while they were home.

*

The park was kind of crowded when we arrived. It wasn't surprising that Miia had come along, considering she was trying her hardest to seduce the clueless wonder. I had tried over the years to instill some situational awareness into him and being clueless was almost like a permanent character flaw in him. On the other hand, he was really easy to get along with and was welcoming to everyone.

“Are you sure we can find a place here to...” Miia started to say as we led her to our regular spot. She caught her breath at seeing the large warded-off area that had no one in it.

“Hi, girls!” I said and waved at nothing, which earned me a very weird look from Miia. “We're here for the picnic and to play some games!”

Various sounds of delight came from the trees, the bushes, from several patches of grass, and from the large clump of trees. The sounds of various feet and wings was next and then a veritable stampede of monster girls came into the open space where we were and Miia's mouth dropped open at seeing twenty very pretty women rush over to us.

“Saturdays are always fun at the park when I can get the day off.” Kimihito said and knelt to set up several blankets and started to pull out containers of food from my expanded bag, each marked for the different monster girls and their special diets. Miia slithered close to him and mumbled incoherently.

“It's so nice to see you.” I said and hugged the trap spider girl that had scurried over to me. She was really cute and was only 4 feet tall with pink hair and fur.

“I love you!” She squeaked and hugged me with four spider legs and her little arms.

“Ha ha, you just love the big juicy bugs I bring you.” I said and took one out of my inventory for her.

“That's what I said!” She squeaked and let me go to hug the giant housefly instead. She bit it to inject her venom into it, waited a few seconds, then she started sucking. “Ohhhh, that's soooo good!”

“You're supposed to wait a few minutes for it to liquefy first, you lush.” I said with a laugh and gave her a head-pat. She let out a sound like a purr and collapsed onto the closest blanket as she buried her face into the fly's neck to keep feeding and ignored my advice.

“You know, I'd be jealous that you always treat her first if you didn't always make up for it.” The wasp woman said as she buzzed closer to me.

I barked a laugh and gave her a hug and a fairly good kiss. Miia let out an odd sound and the other monster girls laughed at her shock.

“It's rare to find someone that treats us as equals and doesn't hate us on sight.” A vicious looking green viper woman said and slithered over to me. “Are you sure you won't come visit my clan?”

I let the happy and blushing wasp go and turned to the viper. “It's against the law for humans and liminals to copulate, you know that.”

“Stupid laws.” She sighed and wrapped her tail around my legs to dominate me. “I miss the days I could just carry you off and have your babies.”

I put my arms around her and she used her human arms to wrap them around my neck. “I know it's not fair. I would have visited a few of your clans to help years ago, you know that.”

“Yes, I do.” She said, seductively. “Milking you would be so much fun.”

I leaned in and kissed her a lot more sensually than I did the wasp, because I knew that was how the viper liked it. “You wouldn't be the only one having fun.”

She hissed happily as she shifted her body just enough to feel me pressing against her cloth covering below her waist. “What about... you know.”

“Mouth harvesting still counts as a sexual act and against the law, unfortunately.” I said and she sighed as she unwrapped herself from around me.

“Damn stupid laws.” She said and slithered over to the container with her name on it and opened it to reveal the eggs Miia refused to eat. “Oooo, you brought more acromantula eggs! I love you!”

I laughed and tried to not imagine she was sucking on something else as she teased me by slowly sucking the soft shell eggs into her mouth and swallowing them. I went to each of the other girls, a mix of dryads, slime girls, spider girls, lizard girls, dog girls, and I was sure the last one was a werewolf.

She growled a little as she pinched my butt, which I retaliated with a slap on her ass. She growled sexily and grinned at me as she wagged her ass at me and asked for another. A few of the other girls laughed and giggled as they talked about wanting to grope me, too.

We all sat down after that and talked about everything since the last time we had a picnic a couple of weeks ago and we enjoyed the food that I had prepared. Kimihito talked to those nearest him and tried to include Miia, and she seemed somewhat subdued.

I wasn't going to mention it, mostly because I was sure she was seeing that Kimihito was nice to everyone and it wasn't just her, which meant her blatant attempts at seduction were ineffectual. He just didn't see her attempts as little more than seeking his attention, that he mostly ignored, because he was giving her his attention anyway.

There was a screech from above and I quickly reached into the basket and tossed a wrapped sub sandwich up into the air. A quick swoop by a blonde harpy snatched it out of the air and she cawed happily at catching something as she flew away.

“Thanks, John.” Kimihito said and took another bite of his own sub sandwich.

“I think she's doing it just to tease you now.” I said and he chuckled. “Despite the lack of hands, she's pretty cute.”

“Do you draw the line at no hands?” One of the lizard girls asked.

I did not tell her there couldn't be mutual foreplay if one of the people in the bed didn't have hands. “No, it's more like I enjoy getting hugged and feeling fingers go through my hair.” I said and a lot of them made sounds of agreement. “Some monster parts can't be used like that, since some of them are either too sharp or too dangerous for petting.”

“It's true. I can't pet you with my stinger, even though I'd love to feel it penetrating you.” The wasp girl said with a wicked smile.

“I'm not sure you realize what that could mean.” I said and wagged my eyebrows at her.

Almost all the girls giggled and blushed before they made happy sounds. Only Miia seemed to stiffen and almost faint at what I implied.

“Oho, I do believe we have an inexperienced lamia here.” The viper said, almost in a hiss.

“She was only sent here recently as an envoy of her clan to search for a husband.” I said and both the viper and Miia turned to stare at me with wide eyes. “Is it so surprising that I know a lot about all of you and how things work on both sides of the world?”

A mixed chorus of 'yes' and 'no' came from all of them, which made me laugh.

“Your secret society came out of the shadows three years ago. I wasn't going to blindly stumble through everything without learning what I could about it.” I said and nodded at Kimihito. “I've done my best to make sure he's not ignorant about you, either.”

“Wh-what?” Miia asked, clearly surprised.

“We practised meeting new people and it's been a lot of fun.” Kimihito said. “John is like the uncle I never had and he taught me a lot.”

“Not as much as I wanted to.” I commented. “Or more than you could handle.”

Kimihito nodded and smiled. “I graduated high school near the top of my class and I found a great job, even if I'm not a genius and everyone knows that. John is the best for helping me so much.”

I patted his shoulder. “Your mother said she would have named me your godfather if I had shown up when you were born.”

Kimihito nodded again. “She wanted to move you in to take care of me, too.”

“She did?” I asked, surprised. “I didn't know that.”

“She told dad years ago and I overheard them.” Kimihito said and finished his sandwich. “She said you were reliable and said you wouldn't take advantage of the situation, whatever that means.”

Miia blushed from embarrassment and looked away from us, clearly showing guilt.

I laughed and picked up another sub sandwich as I whistled a specific bird call. “I think she meant I wouldn't abuse your hospitality by wrecking the place or eating you out of house and home.” I lied and tossed the sandwich high up into the air. I was not going to say it was about not bedding his mother when I easily could.

The green harpy that was more like a hawk seemed to appear out of nowhere and swooped in and snatched it out of the air and cawed happily as she flew off.

“Copycat.” Kimihito said and laughed.

“They'll eat the meat right away and will save the bread and veggies for later.” I said and pulled out a large stack of bowls and spread them out for everyone and filled them with their preferred beverages. The larger bowls made it easier for those with altered hands or fingers to pick them up.

“Thanks, John.” They all said and took several drinks before starting to eat again.

Picnics with friends were the best and we all enjoyed it. When the food was gone and had settled a bit, Kimihito pulled out several different balls and things from the expanded bag for us to play with. That made the monster girls excited and we divided up into teams to start playing a few games.

After several hours, it was over. We said goodbye to everyone and shared hugs. A few kisses were given on my part and some were a bit more involved than they usually were. I didn't mind. It made them feel wanted and they felt flattered that neither I nor Kimihito held their forms against them.

On my side, it was because I had seen, and flirted with, much more oddly formed women. Kimihito was just a nice guy and he saw them as people, only without any previous experience or exposure to aliens like I had. It was reassuring to them to be around us and be treated as normal, which was why they had so much fun spending time with us.

“It really was nice seeing you all again.” I said before the monster girls went back to where they usually stayed or hid. The trap spider had wrapped up the giant housefly to take back to her lair and I gave her a giant cockroach for later. She squealed happily and hugged me, wrapped it up, and scurried off.

Kimihito finished packing up and handed me the expanded bag and waved at their backs. “Bye!”

“Bye, Kimi!” Most of them said and waved various limbs before they disappeared into the foliage.

Miia slithered beside us as we walked out of the protected area. She was quiet until we reached the Hummer and she slithered up into the backseat. Her eyes met mine in the rearview mirror and then darted to the back of Kimihito's head.

“It's all right, you know. He understands.” I said and Kimihito nodded.

“You... you do?” Miia asked.

“I can't promise anything. Miss Smith even said I'm not allowed to do anything I wouldn't do to a normal girl, so you're completely safe while staying with me at home.” Kimihito said.

Miia let out a sigh. “That's not really what I wanted to hear.”

Both Kimihito and I laughed.

“It's not funny.” Miia said and crossed her arms under her large breasts.

“What John told the viper was the truth. He really would have visited several of the snake clans over the last few years. Even yours.” Kimihito told her.

“I know exactly what human laws have done to curb the birth rates. I haven't done anything about it, because I know if I did, I would be in jail faster than you could say 'I'm pregnant'.” I said and Kmihito nodded. “My actions would eventually cause the various monster clans to overrun humanity and start a huge conflict over the government not repealing or making exceptions to the Luminal Laws.”

Miia blinked her eyes several times and her eyes went between Kimihito's head and mine. “You're kidding!”

“I wish I was.” I said and pulled out of the parking spot and drove us home. A detection spell told me that something was flying high above us and I kept a mental eye on it and continued driving. “I have tried to stay out of things, mostly because if I interfere on anyone's behalf, I'll gain the interest of everyone and not just the government.”

“It's better to just live our lives as best as we can. It's not our sole responsibility to change the world.” Kimihito said, wisely. “All we have to do is learn to live in it.”

Miia gave him a searching look and then looked at me. “You really would visit my clan and spread your seed if you were allowed?”

I gave Kimihito a quick glance and saw his smile before I concentrated on the road again. “I'm pretty sure a better or more versatile option will be available to you when the time comes.”

Miia blushed cutely and her tail flicked in both agitation and embarrassment.

I parked in front of Kimihito's house and the thing following us swooped down with the sound of fluttering wings, a screech of metal, and a loud thump on top of the Hummer. Kimihito and I jumped out and looked, only to see an unconscious blue haired and blue feathered harpy upside down on the roof with her clawed feet sticking up in the air and her wings sticking out at odd angles.

“You poor thing.” I said and very carefully lifted her off of the roof with the help of the Force as I cast several diagnostic spells on her. “She's going to need a few bacta treatments to fix her wings.”

“What happened?” Kimihito asked and lightly touched one of the broken wings.

“She must have misjudged where the top of the black vehicle was, hit the edge with her claws to grab on, missed, and thumped into the roof at full force.” I said and nodded at the gouge marks by the back hatch.

“We have a huge couch now, thanks to those workmen. We can spread her wings out there.” Kimihito suggested.

“Good idea. We need the room to work.” I said and carried the harpy into the house.

Miia moved the throw pillows for us and we set the harpy down. Kimihito ran to the bathroom to get the first aid kit and quickly came back to start treating the obvious scrapes and cuts and I did my best to straighten out the harpy's bent wings.

Thankfully, they weren't too messed up after that hard of a hit and I pulled out several green bacta needles. I had worked on it for a long time and after years of experimentation, I had successfully altered it to work with monster human biology.

Their mixed races really made things work oddly, especially medicines, and I couldn't help but eventually discover that it was more magic than anything scientific. That gave me the breakthrough I needed to get the bacta to work. Magic infusions attuned to each species changed the normal blue liquid to green. I couldn't really test it officially, since I was trying my best to stay out of things.

Kimihito helped me with setting the wings into the right positions and we splinted them, then I added the injections directly to the breaks in the bones and we wrapped the wings up to make them immovable. The last thing the harpy needed was to have her wings heal incorrectly.

Miia had slithered to the plush chair off to the side and had watched us as we worked. I could tell by her eyes that she fully approved of our actions and appreciated the care and tenderness we used in treating the hurt harpy.

I could also see a little regret there, too. I didn't warn her to not intentionally hurt herself to receive the same care from us and only gave her a slight shake to my head. She blushed and looked a little embarrassed before she nodded. I gave her a warm smile and nodded back, which made her blush for a different reason.

“I'll keep her asleep for now and can check on her in a few hours.” I said and cast a sleep spell to keep the young harpy unconscious. “If the bacta works at the rate I calculated, she should be fine by suppertime.”

Kimihito nodded and handed me a pillow to put under the harpy's head.

“Thanks.” I said and made sure she was comfortable.

“You mentioned supper.” Kimihito said and smiled. “Are you staying over?”

I chuckled. “You're only supposed to eat your favorite foods on special occasions, you know.”

Kimihito grinned at me and pointed to the kitchen.

I laughed and patted his shoulder as I walked by. “Miia? Any preferences?”

Miia looked surprised I had asked. “Um... well...”

“Human diet, snake diet, or a mix?” I asked.

“You can mix them?” Miia asked, again surprised.

“John is a fantastic cook.” Kimihito said. “He's been teaching me the basics.”

I barked a laugh. “Basics for me, you mean. You could be a chef in any restaurant in the world.”

“I doubt that. Your meals always taste a lot better than anything I make.” Kimihito disagreed.

“You do realize that means I'm tempted to not cook and let you handle it on your own, right?” I asked and started taking ingredients and things out of my inventory and creating what I needed.

“I do okay most days.” Kimihito said with a shrug and sat down on a stool at the counter.

Miia slithered over and coiled up to make her own seat and settled down right beside him. Kimihito leaned slightly to the side towards her and put an arm around her back. Miia almost melted into him at the offer of support and she let out a happy sigh as she snuggled up to his warmth.

“If they had something like a 6 star restaurant, you could be the head chef.” I joked and Kimihito chuckled as Miia looked a little confused. “Businesses only go from 1 star to 5 stars. One being the worst and five being the best.”

Miia blinked her eyes several times and gave Kimihito a searching look. “Your food does taste a lot better than what I had back in the clan.”

“It's the differences in the ingredients and preparation that make the taste change.” I said and showed them what I was doing. “My own inherent skills make things go faster and I add magic that makes the food release the best flavors. It's completely unfair, which is why only friends and family benefit from it.”

“He would be cooking all the time if the general population ever tasted his food.” Kimihito said. “We don't say anything to anyone outside the family or they'd be here bugging him all the time.”

“Kimihito is bad enough.” I said with a laugh and he laughed, too.

“He's joking, of course. Most of the food I have here is stuff we prepped together. When I want to eat, I put it together and finish making the meal.” Kimihito admitted.

“It sounds nice to have that kind of help.” Miia said, wistfully.

“You live here now, so you have it, too.” Kimihito offered.

“I... I do?” Miia asked, unsure.

“It's why John offered you those rare eggs.” Kimihito said. “They're unfertilized, though. He can't release such an invasive species, even by mistake.”

“Unfertilized? How did you get them if you don't have access to the species?” Miia asked.

“He didn't say I didn't have access, just that they haven't been released.” I hedged. I wasn't going to tell her that I just recreated a female from my time in the Harry Potter universe and had her lay eggs for me to copy.

Miia thought about it and her eyes widened. “How... how big... if the eggs are...”

“About the size of my Hummer.” I interrupted her stammering.

“Oh. Oh, my.” Miia looked both scared and interested. “I don't want to know more, do I?”

“Nope.” Both Kimihito and I said at the same time. We exchanged looks and then laughed again.

I finished prepping the meal for supper and set it in the oven. We went back to the living room and watched television for several hours and waited for the bacta to work on the harpy.

About an hour before supper was ready and the harpy would be checked on again, there was a knock on the door. I hadn't been as diligent in keeping an eye out for visitors as usual, mostly because I wasn't at home and had been distracted by Miia trying to flirt with Kimihito and him easily ignoring her.

“I'll get it.” I said and walked over to the front door.

It was Agent Smith and she had a huge smile on her face and a large stack of papers in her hands. “Good afternoon, Mr. Hansen.” Smith said and tried to hand me the papers.

“No, thanks.” I said and stepped back to wave her inside. “Kimihito and Miia are right over there.”

Smith gave me a knowing smile and walked by me and over to the chair the pair were sharing. “You two are looking comfy.”

Miia blushed and ducked her head while Kimihito shrugged.

“I brought over the paperwork for the harpy.” Smith said and dropped it on Kimihito's lap, which Miia was trying to occupy.

“Paperwork?” Kimihito asked.

“It's one of the sub-clauses in the Luminal Law. If one of the selected races follows a patron home, you have to take responsibility for them.” Smith said, smugly.

I barely stopped myself from slapping myself on the forehead at her lying so blatantly.

Kimihito gave her a deadpan look, looked over at me and saw my half-raised hand, and over at the still hurt harpy. He let out a sigh and Smith whooped and threw a fist in the air, realized she just gave herself away, and immediately went back to her stoic personality.

“Fill those out by tomorrow and I'll be by to pick them up.” Smith said and walked back over to me. “Are you sure that you...”

“...don't need the attention.” I finished for her and opened the front door. “Have a good day, Agent.”

Smith nodded and left. She climbed into the black SUV and lifted her sunglasses to give me a pointed look, as if she wasn't going to give up on pawning monster girls off onto me, and the vehicle drove away.

“She's persistent.” I said and closed the door to see Miia's questioning look. “It's another word for a constant pain in the ass.”

Both Miia and Kimihito laughed.

“I'll help you fill those out.” I said and we went to the table and started on it. We had to leave off the harpy's name, in case she had one already, and filled everything else out.

“I didn't have anywhere near this amount of paperwork when I was sent here.” Miia said.

“I think previous agreements with the government covered a lot of this.” I said and tapped the finished stack that only had several sheets kept out for the harpy's name information. “As far as I can tell, the harpy on the couch was born in the wild.”

Miia looked over at the blue haired girl and she wore a tube top and baggy shorts. “Where did the clothes come from if she's wild?”

“From her mother.” I guessed and Miia and Kimihito didn't look convinced. “If she was one of the first few harpies sent out into the human world, became pregnant, and made a nest away from her human house, she would have access to clothes.”

“She's like a wild domesticated harpy.” Kimihito commented.

“That's what some of this paperwork is referring to. She's both accounted for and unregulated, which means she was born after the exchange program was started.” I said and tapped the kept out papers. “It's why we can't assign her a name because she might already have one.”

Kimihito nodded. “It makes sense. When she wakes, we'll talk to her and find out if her mother named her.”

“That's a great idea, Kimihito!” Miia praised him and hugged him close.

“Thanks.” Kimihito responded and hugged her back.

An hour later, we did just that. The harpy's name was Papi and that was it. She was an only child, because the other eggs were taken and sold by her mother's breeder. That set alarms off in my head and I had Eye quickly search for evidence.

By the time supper was served and eaten, Eye tracked down every harpy recipient in the area and launched an investigation. It didn't take long for us to discover there was a black market for harpy eggs and they didn't care if the eggs were fertilized or not, which was disgusting. Some were used for omelettes and others were hatched and grown to produce more eggs.

The next day when Smith showed up to check up on the new member of Kimihito's family, we handed over all the evidence Eye had gathered along with the harpy's filled out forms. She was shocked at what we had found and she promised to look into it, then she ordered the workmen to modify one of the spare rooms to change it into an aviary for Papi and left.

*

I wasn't surprised that over the next six months, Agent Smith seemed to take perverse delight in dropping off troublesome monster girls that she had difficulty placing anywhere else. It was almost ridiculous that Kimihito's house was now almost a mansion in size and had rooms converted for each girl's specific needs.

The best part? Kimihito was as clueless about the girls hitting on him as he always was and they seemed to love him all the more because of it. He treated them all like they were normal people and that pleased them to no end and they all wanted him.

At one point, Kimihito was kidnapped by an Arachne, a half-giant-spider and half-woman creature. I didn't interfere because I knew no one in their right mind would harm him. He was just that personable. Also, he was a leg man and got along very well with the Arachne we had picnics with in the park.

I listened over the open comm link as he talked the Arachne into surrendering after she told him her story. It was a sad one about exploitation and illegal creature trafficking, so Agent Smith set the dogs after the perpetrators and assigned the Arachne to a new host family. Kimihito's.

Yeah, I knew she was going to do that, too. It kept the new troublemaker out of her hair and also made them happy, so it was a win-win situation all around.

I also expected the next move from the government before it happened. Selected hosts were given permission to choose mates if they wanted, just to see if a normal relationship could happen. It was no surprise when Kimihito was picked, except to Kimihito himself. Agent Smith really had a sadistic side to keep doing things like that to the young man.

I pulled her aside when she left Kimihito's house and asked her several questions, just to see her facial reactions. Would he date one? Would he date them all? Would he choose only one and marry them? Would he try to choose them all? Would he become a house husband and spread his seed all over them?

Agent Smith's face twitched after every question I whispered in her ear. I could smell her when she grew wet and the desire on her face was a clear as day. When I motioned to my own house, she let out a sound that I'd only heard a few times before and she dragged me inside. Her immaculate suit was stripped off in moments and she tackled me to the floor.

“You knew... that I was... manipulating him... and you let me.” Agent Smith said between panting moans as she rode me harder than a bucking bronco.

“He knew, too.” I said and she didn't stop moving. “He's such a nice guy that he didn't care.”

“I know! He's... almost perfect. I wish... there were hundreds of him... no, thousands! This country... this world... needs more people like him! Agreeable! Acceptable! He doesn't fight the changes this society needs!” Agent Smith ranted and did her best to take out her frustrations on my quite willing sexual appendage.

I let her have her fun and she adored me for it. She had been pent up for a very long time and hadn't had the chance to do anything about it, since she worked so hard at setting things up all over the place. She was lazy about things when she could be; but, she was always working and needed to rebel in her own way. How could she find someone to get it on with while in the middle of a societal crisis?

I didn't comment that I was right there the whole time. I also didn't comment about the proposals I had submitted to the government and to the various monster girl clans. I knew governments were stupid as a whole and wanted to regulate everything, even if they had no right to.

The way they were treating the situation was a perfect example. People were people, even if they had monster parts. All of them chaffed under the supposed law and order they were subjected to, because it went against their beliefs and what they thought was their right of self-determination.

What right did the government have to tell them they couldn't have sex with a mermaid? Humanity had legends written about sirens of the deep. In fact, most of the monster girl clans had stories and legends written about them.

Everyone has heard about lamias and one of the most famous of them was Medusa herself. She was real, as were her descendants. More people than was healthy wanted to meet them, even with the risk of pissing the lamias off and possibly getting turned to stone. Yeah, people as a whole were stupid.

Well, I suppose it was a high-risk and high-reward thing, too. If you were accepted, it was great. If you weren't, you were dead and it wouldn't matter anymore anyway.

Agent Smith soon had to leave for another meeting, despite her being exhausted and covered in... ahem. I didn't use any obvious powers in front of her and did things the normal way while keeping my skills hidden. I still used them to help clean her up and gave her a cup of coffee that was laced with Pepper-Up potion.

She thanked me for everything, promised to come back when she had time off, and left without even kissing me goodbye. I felt a little used and I didn't mind, since I knew she was busy and I wasn't attached. It was one of the reasons I wouldn't accept being a host family. It wouldn't be fair to them when I left, which I knew would be soon.

It wasn't anything really noticeable that bothered me. The relaxing life I had was just starting to annoy me. It was the little things that popped up and were getting on my nerves. It was almost like I was becoming restless... or... and this was a surprising thing... my abilities wanted to be used and wanted me in the thick of things.

That was an odd thought for me to have. I dove into my Halls of Memory and went over every time I transitioned to a new universe. It didn't take me long to realize it was the truth. The times I had shown up and wasn't right in the middle of things, I quickly became restless. If I had nothing to do, I had to do something.

It was... a revelation.

I looked over my time here on this world and realized Kimihito was the main focus of events here. It wasn't just happenstance that I was nearby. It wasn't just a fluke that I lived in the next door neighbor's house. I was here because Kimihito was here. When I realized that, I left my Halls of Memory and opened my eyes.

“Well, do I stick around to see what happens next? Give Agent Smith a good going over every time she shows up randomly? Or do I settle things here and move on?”

“Beep boop.” Eye responded as he floated over to me on his redone Dragon Drone.

I chuckled. “Yeah, buddy. I know you're bored, too. There's no NASA here. Hell, they never had a space race at all.”

“Boop?” Eye asked.

“The high orbitals have been clean as a whistle for years and only a few satellites are up there. Huge ones. Not counting ours, of course.” I said and he beeped a laugh. “I know, I know. There's not much point having them up there, since there's nothing for them to tap into that's worth the trouble.”

“Beep.” Eye commented.

“Space is boring here, so going for a quick flight is kind of pointless. This is more of a modern fantasy world than anything else.” I said.

Eye beeped at me again.

“I don't know how the solar system developed, either. The mapping went a lot faster, since there's not a whole lot out there. Most of the planets don't have moons and even the normal Oort Cloud at the edge of the solar system is only fragments and not a huge electronic signal barrier like it usually is.”

“Boop.” Eye agreed.

“Yeah, we'll give it another few years and then we'll head off. Kimihito's getting to the point that he won't have time for us anymore. His life's getting too full now and that's saying something.” I said with a laugh. “Oh! Want to help me start a gaming company? There's a surprising lack of electronic entertainment here. We could pump out cheap consoles and rip off games from other worlds.”

“Beep!” Eye said, happily.

“You're right. Rewriting the game programs for compatibility should keep us busy for a while.” I said and we went into the lab. Doing things like that for fun always seemed to calm us down.

*

Two years later, Kimihito married the Arachne, to the disappointment of all the other monster girls that lived with him. He had finally admitted to her that he was a leg man and she capitalized on that and snatched him up. She also loved him dearly and he felt the same. None of the other monster girls moved out, though. They had become a family over the years and that was that.

The gaming consoles barely made any dent in the country's economy. Only a few thousand people wanted an electronic version of fantasy games that they could experience in real life. Even the science fiction games were poor sellers because the space mentality was never prevalent in society. With no space race to spark their imagination, no one really thought about going to the stars and exploring.

Agent Smith only popped by every few months or so for a booty call and she never wanted anything more than that. Like Kimihito, her life was too full of other things for her to have any kind of time commitment that she thought would only drag her down.

So, Eye and I decided it was time to move on. We easily settled everything, gave the house to Kimihito for the change he had in his pocket, and told Agent Smith the code to the emptied secret lab that was now filled with thousands of the various sperm donor biological specimens that I had produced for the Amazons.

I left before she decided to try one out for herself, since she had pretty much used me like one anyway the last few years, only without her getting pregnant. With nothing left to do, I stored Eye and covered myself in Chi and magic before I disappeared.