Has2Win

This is the first chapter of a potential novel I was planning to write. Don't expect any more chapter's for a while, this is just an introduction as I fill in the details and plot. The next chapter will have to wait till new years at a minimum, please tell me what you think.

"This game is clearly trash... let's play it as a finale so I don't end up hooked on playing again. This little girl is the same age as Thalia too." A room full of wrappers, crisp packets and unused gym equipment was where this protagonist spent the last 2 years of his life.

A cheap sofa he brought up from a furniture dump on its way to the recycling plant, along with all sorts of gaming devices people no longer wanted. A television being the only thing he paid for, all because he knew deep down that his current situation was pathetic.

'At the very least, let's not be a financial burden on mom and dad on top of being an emotional one.' That was what he thought as he dragged the old sofa into his room. Two years of half-hearted studies and part time jobs that were never more that 15 hours a week, all with promises to himself that he will get into university this year. This kept on going until 3 days ago; his parents died in a car accident.

Sadiki went through the burial in a daze: signing papers for the grave, helping with the cleaning of the bodies, looking through the inheritance papers. All he could remember was that they were cold... his parents were so, so cold. He couldn't sleep under a blanket until now because he would have nightmares about the cold seeping into his bones.

"I should pack everything so I can send it when they get sold." Sadiki stood up and pack his game consoles in boxes to be mailed when ready, he put them up for sale for cheap on eBay, he needed some pocket-change until the inheritance and insurance money came through. After it was all done, he took a deep breath to steel himself and left his room.

He was scared, scared that he wasn't good enough. Can he, do it? He was the legal adult and the person they needed most right now... 'but can I do it?'

The house was silent, three bedrooms and a bathroom were upstairs with an attic as another bedroom. Two living rooms downstairs, a toilet, and a large kitchen that was used as a dinner room too. A large house, yet so quiet it made his heart ache, 'They were never quiet, can someone like me bring back laughter and joy into their lives?' His thoughts bounced around chaotically in his mind with each step he took down the stairs, wanting to escape back to his room and play the final game he chose on his phone.

In one of the living rooms, they were there, sitting on a red sofa together. Having just come back from their relative’s house, they were huddled together and watching a TV show, but their unfocused eyes made it clear they weren't looking at the screen. Helena turned to look at him, she was a strong girl who looked after the other two while Sadiki focused on doing all the papers with the help of his uncles and aunts. However, there hadn't been anyone there to look out for her.

He sat down next to the three of them, not saying a word. He didn't know what to say, even till know he hadn't truly cried. The tears at the funeral felt perfunctory, like he needed to show he was sad so others wouldn't start chatting shit about him and bothering the younger ones. So he wasn't sure if he had what it took to say anything to them, they were far more reliant on his parents than he was.

"What do you want to eat? I'll make something for breakfast." Those were the words that came out of his mouth but inside he was screaming, 'why can't I comfort them?!'

"...French toast." "Nutella pancake." He knew they would ask for that; mother's specialities she rarely made. He felt blessed that he happened to know how she used to make them. "Sure, I'll make them for you."

Normally, mom would scold them and tell them to choose one for her to make... but obviously this isn't the time for that. Sadiki took out the eggs, milk, butter, sliced bread, and olive oil. First was preparing the French toast, followed by the Nutella, flour and sugar. The sugar was minimal since Nutella was used; Sadiki remembered being scolded for using too much sugar two years ago.

When he started mixing the pancake mix, he heard someone coming from behind. He turned around and all three were there, looking at him silently. "Go take a seat Thalia, Kalen. It'll be ready in ten minutes, help me out Helena." Sadiki was the only one in the house who used full names for everyone, 'Is it because I'm not close with them? After all, I'm a disappointment to them as an elder brother over these few years.'

They did as told quietly, it frightened him just how quiet the twins were, they were never quiet. Soon, a dozen thin pancakes and half a dozen French toast were prepared, he was happy that he made it just the same way his mother did. "There's a lot that needs to be done and a lot that needs to be said, so eat up for now. I'll do my best from now on." The words left his mouth awkwardly, try his best? Had he ever put in any true effort for them before?

"Bro-ki, it's good. Just like mom's" The first to speak was the strongest heart at the table, just as always, it was Helena.

"Mm." The other two made sounds of affirmation, then tears started to fall.

"But I want mom to make it!!!" Kalen cried as though a dam in heart had finally burst, Thalia soon followed. Helena might be strong, but she was the biggest cry-baby in the house. Sadiki was surprised when found himself smiling, he was relieved. 'They finally let it out.'

"I know. I wish she made it too, but if you still want to eat it, I'll make it for you." He reached out rubbed Kalen's back carefully, "But today's an exception, mom's rules still stick so only once on the weekdays and once on the weekend, okay?" Kalen nodded as he cried even louder.

They all let out their grief, one tear at a time, each bite bringing memories still fresh in their minds. While they wondered, how long would pass before these memories would blur, just like everything else.

Despite it all, Sadiki never cried.