The world came to a spinning stop as Eve and Gwen landed on a patch of soft grass. Eve blinked slowly and looked at her surroundings. They were in a large forest with trees bigger than the largest towers Eve had seen. The canopy of the forest did a good job of hiding the sun, it was like the entire forest was in a constant state of twilight and Eve felt entirely comfortable. She looked around and her jaw dropped at the sight of three beautiful women, clad in leaves and vines, their skin made of wood. The women laughed and giggled as they jumped in and out of a small, running brook with crystal clear water. They begin to do a strange dance near the stream of water and they started to sing in a foreign language. The women held hands and danced in a circle, as they danced a small plant begin to sprout from the ground, it quickly grew and grew until it was a full grown tree with a wide trunk. The women stopped dancing and giggled as they hugged the tree tightly.
"Those are the dryads." Eve heard Gwen say from behind her.
"They're peaceful and only care about the forest. I keep them safe in exchange for sanctuary here." Gwen stated nonchalantly as she took Eve's hand and lead her down a well worn stone path in the middle of the forest.
"this is the way to my home, you'll meet the rest of our neighbors soon I'm sure."
Eve nodded and continued following Gwen through the dense forest, soon they reached what Eve assumed to be Gwens home. It was a large tower only slightly smaller than the biggest trees here. Eve noticed people.. Or at least she thought they were people coming out of large holes in the trees surrounding them.
They were tall, taller than the average human. They had pale, fair skin, long, blonde hair and pointed ears. The strangest thing about them was their eyes. The women had bright pink eyes with a pale white slit in the middle, while the men had bright blue eyes with dark and black sideways slits similar to a reptile.
"Ahem, Eve these are my friends and neighbors the elves. The humans ran them out of their cities about a century ago."
The tallest of the elves bowed down to Gwen.
"My lady, your return is sooner than expected, do you need assistance with anything?" The tall Elfman said.
"Yes King Yuel, unfortunately we have a few hunters after this little one." Gwen said gesturing towards Eve.
"She needs a strength boost, immediately, I'm afraid we don't have much time before our little sanctuary is attacked."
King Yuel nodded and motioned for two other elves to follow him into Gwen's tower.
Gwen looked down at Eve and smiled.
"You're safe, at least for now and I'd imagine you must be hungry." She said.
Eve nodded and grimaced as she felt her stomach growl, her fangs extended slightly and her red eyes dilated at the thought of warm blood.
"I've got some very special blood for you, it will boost your growth by a tremendous amount. One drop of elvish blood would be the equivalent of feeding on a hundred humans. Their blood is also very potent with magic and since they're immortal you don't need to worry about over feeding, it won't harm them." Gwen said as she led Eve into her tower.
The building was very sparse of furniture and looked completely utilitarian.
Gwen led Eve to a small chair and had her sit, she motioned for the elves and they proceeded to line up in front of Eve. The first elf was a young woman with pink eyes, similar to the rest of her kin. She held out her wrist for Eve and Eve felt herself salivating from the sound of heartbeats all around her.
"I must warn you Eve, if you ingest elvish blood the changes may be.. Uncomfortable. Unfortunately in the short amount of time we have this is the only option to make you stronger." Gwen said solemnly.
"I..I don't care.. I'm hungry and if this is the only way then I'll do it." Eve said as her pupils dilated, looking at the inviting veins on the young elf girls wrist.
Gwen nodded and sat down on a chair adjacent from Eve.
"Begin." She said as Eve struck the young girls wrist, greedily gulping down the most potent and delicious blood she'd ever tasted in her entire life. It made human blood seem like cold dirt in comparison.
By the time Eve had drained every single elf in the room she felt a strange feeling overtaking her. She groaned in pain as she felt her skin grow cold, like ice. She let out a shrieking scream as large batlike wings broke through the skin on her back and unfolded themselves. The wings were at least 10 feet across and two foot wide. They were huge and beautiful in a strange way. Eve felt the next changes course through her and she felt a powerful feeling deep within her core. She let out another ear piercing screech as her short claws grew into deadly dagger like digits, harder than the strongest steel. Eve screamed again and this time the furniture and everything within a few feet of Eve froze, even the floor was covered in ice.
Eve Sat in the frozen chair, panting as the changes slowed and everything stopped. She felt as though time itself would be at her command if she so wished it. She'd never felt so euphoric, so energized and powerful in her entire life.
"That.. That was amazing." Eve panted as she looked up at Gwen.
Gwen nodded.
"Two more feedings and you'll reach the same level as an elder vampire. I'd say you just boosted your growth by about fifty years. We need to take things slow though. Only one feeding from the elves per week. That gives us two weeks to prepare."
"I promise Eve, that scum Arthur and his pet wizard will not harm you." She growled.
I accidentally misread pet wizard, as, pet lizard.
I feels like she's using paid-to-win items
Lmao i don't think I've ever laughed that hard at a comment before 😂
There are many capitalization issues with this chapter. Eve sometimes is not capitalized, and other times words are capitalized when they shouldn't be.
Didn't notice but thanks. Fixed it.
This story feels like it's been rushed, it seems to jump from plot point to plot point with little in between, kind of like an overeager puppy bounding about, it's endearing, but if you haven't adopted it you'll quickly grow tired of its antics.
I don't like things to drag on and I'm a bit bored of writing this atm. Sorry you didn't enjoy it
I probably won't finish this anyways
@Unicornpuke97 I didn't mean to imply I didn't enjoy it so much as point out what I believe to be the biggest weakness of this story. You say you don't like things to drag on, but I'd say that's something to consider working on for your next project, I think you might have overcompensated. I have my own problems when I write, I have a tendency to want to over explain things, so I know how hard it can be to overcome such impulses.
men had bright blue eyes with dark and black sideways slits similar to a reptile. -> black vertical slits (reptiles have vertically slit eyes, grazing animals like sheep and goats have horizontally slit/elongated eyes)
“Their blood is also very potent with magic and since they're immortal you don't need to worry about over feeding, it won't harm them.”
Uhhhh….this seems like a lie. Well, the “don’t worry about over feeding” part, since if the elves were immortal in such a way as to be able to be unaffected by blood loss I can’t see them having been able to be driven out by the humans
“Unfortunately in the short amount of time we have this is the only option to make you stronger.”
Serious question, but…why is it such a rush? Isn’t part of the entire reason Gwen brought Eve to her forest is so Gwen could protect Eve? Eve getting stronger to be able to defend herself is a good thing, but it seems odd to have things phrased like this and the focus be like this since the entire reason for fleeing with Eve was so Gwen could protect her
“She'd never felt so euphoric, so energized and powerful in her entire life.”
And this is why this “rush to make Eve stronger” seems like a bad idea. Eve has no idea how to control her new power, let alone use magic or powers like that in general, and the power is clearly going to her head a bit. Maybe she won’t rush off and be stupid, but she’s clearly not used to her new level of power, so even if she doesn’t run off and get herself killed, she’s likely to have difficulty adjusting to her new power since it’s such a huge difference to go from basically mortal level power to now apparently 50+ year old vampire level in a single day
I wanted to make the elves in my story different from the usual elves in fantasy. So they don't die from injuries like in lotr, and they don't fight at all. I'm going to explain why Gwen is in a rush in the next few chapters and as far as eve's character I'm leaning towards making her sort of scary and powerful but also a kind and righteous queen in the end. If I continue this I'll go into more detail but I'm a bit bored of writing this atm so we'll see when I pick it up again
@Unicornpuke97
So immortal pacifists? I'd considered that possibility, but it seemed unlikely.
As for Eve-I didn't get the impression that she was going evil/cruel like she started out as, but she's clearly letting her new power go to her head a bit and will have no idea how to control her new power unless she's taught and works hard at it (which seems likely to happen). So it's more like Eve is getting ahead of herself and needs someone to bring her back to the ground and her normal self
As a side note-how did you do the spoiler like that where it's a small tab only? Normally I can only get the larger spoiler tab, though the smaller one seems to have the downside of being unable to be closed if it is opened, unlike the big tab
"this is the way
Gwen led eve
Capitalisation.