Dear Diary,

We gave the air elementals a sending stone thing. That way they can tell us when players are on their floor. They haven’t used it yet, but we feel pretty smart about giving it to them. I mean, before, we were just surprised when the players got here. We knew more or less when to expect them, but now we’ll know for sure. 

The snowmen are all set up and ready to kill people. Mika made an alligator out of snow, and gave it metal teeth. She and Lilly have a bet on if someone will be stupid enough to get bitten by it. And by bitten I mean set off the obvious trap. 

Other than that it’s mostly just lever things, where if the head gets pushed off it’ll release a spring, which will push up a bunch of hidden pickaxes. So I guess the snowmen are secretly evil snow spiders. 

Y has been hanging out with me a bit more lately. He wants to figure out what exactly the slimes are allergic to. Or, not allergic, what makes them dissolve. Because it would be really weird if it’s just straight ranch dressing that they don’t like. So Y has been making a bunch of cream-based salad dressings. 

It’s been pretty fun, making salad dressings with a scientist. I mean, anyone who loves cooking by default learns about chemicals and reactions and temperatures and stuff. Like, it’s best to make pie crust with super cold water so the butter doesn’t melt and absorb into the flour before it gets into the oven. And replacing a tiny bit of the water with vodka will make it even more flakier because the alcohol evaporates as it cooks. That’s just something everyone who’s made a bunch of pie crusts knows. And you never use pre-crushed peppercorns, because the oils that give it flavor evaporate over time. Keeping them whole seals the oils in. Duh. 

But there’s a difference between cooking something to taste good, and cooking something to get a specific chemical reaction. Y thinks the slimes might be reacting to the salt, fat, or possibly lactose. Thing is, they look kind of gelatinous but they react to the ranch like how soda reacts to milk. Like, aaaah bluuh. Y’no? 

…Wow that was a really bad description. But, I mean… root beer float. When the ice cream hits the root beer, it instantly makes a ton of bubbles, and the ice kinda crystallizes, preventing everything from mixing. Everyone knows this. But if you pour straight milk into root beer, you get the same bubbles, but since nothing is frozen the milk curdles and separates. The soda goes flat pretty fast, and after a couple minutes you’re left with a really gross liquid with a layer of chunky white slime at the bottom. 

Same basic thing with the slimes. But they aren’t made of soda. As far as we can tell, they aren’t carbonated. But they are acidic, and that might have something to do with it. 

Anyways, I’ve been making a lot of salads to go with Y’s salad dressings. A part of me hopes the slimes die when they’re hit with any kind of dressing, even a vinaigrette, just to mess with Y’s head. 

Sure it’s mean, but it’d be hilarious. 

Goodnight, Dungeon!