So, when I started writing this, I had many grand ideas for what I wanted to happen. I wanted a story that could blend all of these cool concepts together in order to create a wonderful story.
I did not realize just how hard it would be to do so in a cohesive manner. As a new writer I should have kept it in a simpler state. Before I continue, let me say I am not dumping this story permanently.
I had wanted a story with evolution, a system, leveling, a harem, a twin, a genderbent mc and an interesting complex setting. I wanted to avoid bland characters and walking stereotypes.
In trying to have all these moving parts I got lost in it all and the quality suffered. Everything from some simple descriptions to full character arcs.
I have been trying to write the next chapter for this book for some time. Every time I try all I can see are all the mess ups staring me in the face. I need to step away from it and take time to improve my writing before I continue this story.
My current plans mean going back and adding everything I missed. I plan on holding back releasing the rewritten content until it is all done.
While working on this I do plan on starting a second book, this will help with burn out and aid me in improving my writing.
This is what I am looking to improve. Descriptions, pacing, sex scenes and character development. Please feel free to provide feedback if you think I should add anything.
On to the new story, it will be set in a near future that has magic and other fantasy elements. I am hoping that with this new setting it will help with descriptions. I plan on keeping the system, leveling, genderbent and harem elements. Cutting out the evolution, mc twin and reincarnation bits.
TLDR: taking a break from current book, starting new one while fixing old one.
On to some other new, a discord is in the works. If anyone is good with them and is willing to help, please let me know.
This will aid all of us, it will give me a place to make announcements and answer any of your questions you have.
Thanks for your hard work! Recognizing your own shortcomings is the first step to improving in anything
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I still think that the spoiled main clan son was punished too much (but can’t be bothered to argue further). From my perspective he said some mean words then suddenly DEATH SENTENCE!!!
In the comments it was then said that he had learned too much but I saw nothing strengthening that in the actual story, what did he see?
This story point could had been handled better (in my opinion) if more time had been added between gender bending him and showing a gradual procedure between mc getting sick if his sh*t and trying everything else before reaching this point or showing a more drastic threat that forced their hand or showing a more clear reason why such measures needed to be taken.
Then again with everything showing how ruthless this world is with people willingly becoming companions for protection this kind of makes sense? It just felt weird coming from the mc without some internal struggle or something considering how the story had depicted her up to that point.
It could just be that the image I had in my head was wrong from the story you the author was trying to tell and it was a “me” problem rather than yours but the lack of details in a lot of things could also have led to this difference in opinion.
I am willing to admit that I might had been wrong and that not all stories is from everyone but for what it’s worth I really liked this story in spite of it’s shortcomings and am eager to see how it can be improved in the future (or not, all up to you).
I wish you luck in any further endeavor! Have a nice day
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That could have been done better and will be one of the things I work on.
A good rule of thumb is trying to take 5 chapters for a minor change and 10 for a large change. Adding a new lead character would a major change so having extra chapters to flesh them out and integrate them is necessary to stop cluttering
I will keep that in mind.
I do not know how you plan your writing but personally my latest project has about 20 pages of lore info, planed arks as well as story board planning for only the first 10 chapters.
Personally I didn't mind the twin it was nice to see him willing to help the girl. Though it would've been nice to see her become a more fleshed out character. But it was a nice addition since I Personally don't see too many twin based stories.
There is a missing tag that should have been added since the beginning of the book...: Futanari
It's perfectly acceptable to use a few cliches every so often, just don't go overboard. Also, I could help with the discord server (just don't give me a moderator or administrator role)
TL;DR: author got lost in the sauce. I understand my dude, i have temporarily dropped quite a few stories myself. First one because turns out: writing a character without internal monologues is kinda difficult. The second one I stopped because I guess I got too nervous to write the second fight scene. It happens to all of us
haha jokes on you it can't happen if you never try hahaha.....
sobbing...