"No no no. I gave you my phone number for just this sort of situation."

 

 

 

The whole family was gathered in the living room with a single cell phone propped up on the coffee table. It was pushed far enough back that everyone could be seen by the camera. The video call displayed a psychologist assigned to help Toshi recover, one Doctor Waki Taro.

 

Asuka nodded, "Thank you all the same. It's late on Sunday, but tomorrow Toshi is going back to school, and... we had an incident." Toshi sighed and leaned back on the couch, sitting between his parents. It was a little uncomfortable since Asuka didn't seem to like physical contact and his father was the touchy-feely type. Asuka could tell Toshi felt more comfortable near her and was entirely unsure what to make of it. As for his father, he seemed to be trying desperately to hide how upset he was that his son found his touch repulsive.

 

Hinako was asked to explain what happened. As she did so, she was careful to leave out the parts about discussing Soapland. When she got near the end, her parents each gave a similar account of what happened. They all seemed to agree that the topic was about human sexuality and it touched a nerve. Toshi went ballistic, then managed to calm down. Asuka thought it would be best to talk it over with a professional.

 

Dr Waki listened carefully, then asked, "And what is your point of view, Toshi?"

 

Toshi shrugged, "Basically the same."

 

The doctor nodded slowly, "Basically. Which means some parts aren't the same. What parts would that be?"

 

Toshi looked annoyed, "We all know I just need to get used to things. I get it. I was in the wrong. Sorry for having an emotional meltdown." The doctor frowned briefly, before returning to a neutral facade, "No. Feelings are never right or wr-"

 

Toshi cut him off, "Look. The problem is I'm trying to impose my will on a world that doesn't care. My feelings on this matter don't matter. I just need to learn to accept all of this." He gestured with his hand as if jumping over something, "You can't just get over something." He held his hand flat and thrust it forward an inch, "You get through something." He pushed his arm out to full length, "You get past it." He dropped it into his lap, "You move on."

 

Dr Waki was quiet, slowly raising an eyebrow as he tried to process what Toshi said. He tilted his gaze to the side, "Mister Kimoto, Has your son always been like this?"

 

Hirofumi shook his head, "No. He's always been very in touch with his feelings! This is a complete one-eighty from how he used to be before-" He swallowed and shuddered slightly before continuing, "Before the incident."

 

Toshi quipped in, "Before the RAPE." The other three flinched at the word.

 

Toshi looked at the phone, "THIS." He pointed at the other three, "This is the problem. They're more freaked out that-" He turned and talked to his family, "I GOT RAPED-" He turned back to the Doctor, "Then I am. They can't even say the word." He hooked a thumb at his sister, "She doesn't even believe women can be raped, and frankly that very statement terrifies me."

 

The doctor nodded, "It does? Why?"

 

Toshi gave the phone a double take, "Seriously? Look. I can handle this because I got a hole in my mind so for me this isn't quite real." He jogged his head toward his sister, "If some asshole took advantage of my sister and she doesn't believe it could even happen, how is she going to deal with something she can't even admit exists?"

 

The doctor stared at Toshi with a strange look, "Well... admittedly there is statutory rape, but a man raping a woman, while technically possible, is such a rarity that you'd be more likely to be struck by lightning."

 

Toshi stood up, "I'm out."

 

His parents reached up and held out their hands to block his escape, "Wait. Hold on. You can't just-"

 

Toshi forced his way out from the confinement of sitting between his parents to the archway leading out of the living room. He paused to turn around, "No." He pointed at the phone, "I'm not listening to someone who can't accept that my sister matters!" He pointed at Asuka, "Or my mother!" He grabbed the sides of his head and winced before he threw his hands up in the air, "I know! I'm the one who is wrong here. I know society, hell, everyone on the planet disagrees with me." He slowly turned away, then put his hand on the archway to steady himself as he looked over his shoulder back at everyone, "I don't care. I can't change. I won't change. This is me." He walked up the stairs and to his room.

 

Hirofumi started to follow but the doctor said, "Stop." Hirofumi looked back as the doctor continued, "Stay." Toshi's father sat back down and looked at the phone. All eyes were on the doctor. Dr Waki cleared his throat, "I have seen this before. He might claim to not remember anything, but clearly, his subconsciousness does. He was violated. His way of dealing with it is to quote, accept it, unquote." The doctor spoke calmly and deliberately, "However, to accept this, he must accept that, at least in his mind, women are better than men. So, to reconcile this, he comes to identify with women. To be more feminine." The doctor cleared his throat again, "He was emasculated by a woman, so women are better than men. Ergo, he shall act like one."

 

Hinako frowned, "So was that why he was talking about-" She stopped, "Uh... never mind" The doctor raised an eyebrow, "Please. Finish your thought." She looked very uncomfortable, "He... asked me what I thought about him working at a soapland."

 

Hirofumi went white. Asuka clenched both her fists. You could hear the sound of cracking teeth as she clenched her jaw.

 

Hinako quickly added, "I told him mom would kill anyone who slept with him and I said I'd murder anyone who hired him." She then looked back at Asuka, "And I honestly think he was asking because he just didn't get it, not because he wanted a job."

 

The doctor nodded, "Ah. I see. Well... a bit extreme. I do not recommend murder, but I also think you need to make it clear that he is still important as a man. I think it would be best if he avoided any sort of sexual relationship indefinitely. For the time being, at least. He is extremely vulnerable and I fear it would be all too easy for a woman to take advantage of him in such a state. He might even start thinking that he deserves to be abused."

 

Hirofumi bit his lower lip and wiped at his eyes with a tissue, "What can we do?"

 

The doctor took a deep breath, "Let him know you love him. Perhaps try to persuade him to do some more... masculine activities. Go shopping for clothes, perhaps. Maybe go to a spa and get pampered for the afternoon. Anything that might remind him of how he's a young man." He raised a finger to the camera, "Do be careful to not force it on him. You need to make it seem appealing, not drive him further away from himself." Asuka nodded slowly, "I see. So..." She paused, "I have to admit we've been having a rocky relationship the past few years. It is nice to have him so..." She drifted off as she got lost in thought. Abruptly she refocused on the doctor, "Should I push him away?"

 

The doctor shook his head, "No no no... No. Certainly not. He is dealing with this in his own way. Mentally he is grabbing onto anything he can hold onto. Pushing him away would only make it worse. He'll just find someone else and that person could be far less likely to treat him well." He tapped a finger against his chin as he pondered out loud, "What you need to do is comfort him, but when you can, remind him of how he should act. If he pushes back, drop it. There is no quick solution to this."

 

Hinako raised a hand, "Anything I can do?"

 

The doctor nodded, "This might be the hardest thing to do. You need to listen to him without judging him. He needs to keep talking and if he doesn't, we won't know what is going on in his mind. He might get the idea of telling us what we want to hear instead of what he really thinks. So... try to be open." He then snapped his fingers, "And if at all possible, keep an eye on him. He may start trying to get into dangerous situations. If he gets self-destructive, we can discuss having him spend some time in a mental hospital."

 

Everyone nodded and agreed to the doctor's suggestions, "And one last thing..." The doctor added, "If he starts talking about suicide, even as a joke, it's not a joke. Take it VERY seriously."

 

Asuka nodded, "Of course, we will."

 

The doctor nodded, "If he continues to reject me as his doctor, we can talk about getting someone else. If nothing else, I suggest we leave it here."

 

---

 

Toshi was listening from the top of the stairs as they hung up. He quickly and quietly slipped into his room, ~How do I explain I'm sane? It's the rest of the world that is nuts.~ He quietly closed his door, but not completely to avoid it making a sound. He scooted over to lie down on the bed, ~I don't know if I can pull this off.~ He looked at the ceiling, ~Hey. God. Are you still there? Did you do this on purpose? Am I supposed to do something here? Because if I'm not, you need to let me know. I swear to you, I can't just let this bullshit go. It's not in my nature and I assure you, I used to get companies from all over the planet to work together. I know how to organize.~

 

He lay there, listening, looking around, and wondering if there would be a reply.

 

Nothing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He closed his eyes and inwardly sighed, ~Don't say I didn't warn you.~