Chapter 4: Reflection
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It was supposed to have been another uneventful day, a day like any other.

My days were supposed to be unchanging and predictable.

My days were supposed to be comfortable and calm. 

However, before the start of my summer vacation, my life took a nose dive into the unknown. I couldn't predict what was going to happen next, and my heart was restless. I did things that I never usually did, and I experienced things that never usually happened. Due to that, I was losing control over my own life. 

I didn't want that.

I didn't like surprises.

 In fact, I hated them.

For better or for worse, two people had come into my life unannounced. They were a suicidal girl whom I'd never met and a beautiful girl whom I couldn't even recognize. One tugged on my conscience, while the other tugged on my heart.

It was still noon, and the sun was directly overhead. The university's hallways had air conditioning, but it felt as if I was being baked alive. After hearing that beautiful girl's bold confession, sweat started to drip from my head to my neck. 

I was drenched in it, and I could feel the fabric of my shirt clinging to my skin.

The sincerity, in her words, made my cheeks flush red. There was a tightness in my lungs, and my breathing was stifled by a lump in my throat. 

It was an involuntary reaction, based on emotion and shock. I knew it was nothing more than a biological shortcoming, and yet it was proof that I was human.

I was a simple human, who couldn't even talk to a girl, real or otherwise.

My phone's ringtone was faint in the background of the hallway, and yet it had managed to overrun my ears and my thoughts. KawaiiKanojo wouldn't stop calling. 

However, I wondered why the girl in front of me had an overreaction to this ringtone. It was probably the reason for the sudden confession. As I pondered the significance of my ringtone, she had kept me frozen in place with her eyes.

Her irises were a serene cerulean blue, reminiscent of the water belonging to Yonaha Maehama Beach in Okinawa. I had many fond memories of going to that beach as a child. However, what I enjoyed the most about that beach, was seeing my own reflection in the crystal clear waters. 

In that reflection, it was me and only me. The reflection was so pristine that it'd have been stained if touched. That's why I only ever admired it, and I never thought to sully it with my own hands. At that young age, I was amazed by nature's ability to create such a stunning image, but I was more taken back by the simplicity of it all. I was surprised that a simple reflection by the coast of the beach would become such a fond memory.

However, I felt none of that right now. Instead, I felt somewhat uncomfortable.

Coming back to the present, I was gazing into the clear eyes of the girl in front of me. From a single glance, I knew what was going on in her mind. She looked at me the same way I looked at my own reflection all of those years ago.

In her eyes, she saw me and only me. 

I had never met her once, I had never even heard the sound of her voice until today, but she looked at with such pure longing eyes. It was almost as if she'd been searching for me, but that wasn't possible.

I knew that I wasn't worth anyone's time.

That's why I felt uncomfortable. I didn't understand her. I didn't know anything about her.

Most importantly, I didn't know what to say to her. Therefore I was glad that she decided to break the tense atmosphere.

"Hey senpai, although I would like to hear your response to my confession, your phone has been ringing for a while now. You should answer it."

She was right. I had almost forgotten about KawaiiKanojo. However, my situation with KawaiiKanojo wasn't any better than my situation with her. Instead of being confessed to, I had been the one had confessed. Albeit, it was unintentional.

With my fingers fumbling about, I picked my phone off the ground and managed to slide my thumb on the answer key. I then held the phone up to my ear, but there was only silence on the other end. I thought that the call had disconnected, so I let my guard down. I felt the stiffness of my body starting to leave, and I let out a long exhale.

Then it happened...

"DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I TRIED TO CALL YOU? WHAT KIND OF GUY CONFESSES TO A GIRL AND THEN GHOSTS THEM? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THIS LYNE ACCOUNT FIRST OF ALL? RATHER, WHO ARE YOU?"

Even though I didn't put the phone on speaker, her voice was so explosive so that anyone around me could hear her. Needless to say, I had gone temporarily deaf in one ear. It was to be expected that she would be this loud. After all, she sent me thirty freaking messages and called my phone non-stop.

I was starting to wonder who I hated more; KawaiiKanojo or Satou Sota

I was overwhelmed by being bombarded with questions. I didn't even know where to start when answering them. In fact, I was still trying to figure out what was happening.

Before I even had a chance to reply, my ears were once again assaulted by KawaiiKanojo's yelling.

"SO YOU GOING TO ANSWER OR WHAT? I KNOW YOU'RE THERE! I HEARD THAT SIGH EARLIER!"

The tone of her voice was aggressive, and I couldn't tell if I was talking to a girl or a savage animal. If I didn't answer her now, she'd only get madder. Therefore, I decided to say whatever came to mind first and hoped that I could naturally navigate the conversation towards a favorable outcome.

"Yes, I'm here. Although, can you refrain from speaking too loud? I'm still at school."

I thought that I'd be met with even louder yelling and opposition. However, what happened next was somewhat anti-climatic.

Her aggressive voice softened, and she said with an upbeat voice,

"Oh, I see. Call me when you're free. See you later!"

Just like that, the call abruptly ended. I had an exasperated face and was both shocked and furious. My eyes had stopped blinking, and I was holding back the urge to throw my phone against the wall. I understood that she was trying to be considerate, but did she not understand how much courage it took for me to answer her call. I still had more things I wanted to say to her. Internally, I was screaming,

DAMN THAT KAWAII KANOJO!

DAMN THAT KAWAII KANOJO!

DAMN THAT KAWAII KANOJO!

DAMN THAT KAWAII KANOJO!

"S-Senpai? Y-You had a g-g-girlfriend  already?"

In the heat of the moment, I had almost forgotten about the girl in front of me. The girl who I had accidentally sexually harassed. The girl whose name, I didn't even know. 

Her cheeks were flushed red, and she was trying to fight back tears that were welling up in her eyes. Even though she was on the verge of crying, I couldn't comfort her. I already knew what she wanted to hear. However, I couldn't be honest with her, since I too didn't know if I had a girlfriend or not.

Instead, I then stood there in the hallway and looked at her while she was in such a fragile state. As my skin was absorbing the sunlight, I came to a sudden realization.

It was only the start of summer vacation, but I knew that it was going to be one that I'd never forget.

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