Hi, slave girl here. No, that isn't my name, but I don't know what my name is, so slave girl it is. I'm currently a criminal slave. What crime did I do? Obviously the worst crime of all! I attempted to assassinate the president! Just kidding, I was arrested for being insane. I do talk to myself, so that point is reasonable, but no. That wasn't their reasoning for my insanity. No! It was the fact I claimed to have a Sacred Power! 'Blasphemy!' they said. 'Heretic!' they screamed. 'Fuck you! You fucked my daughter!' they yelled. That last one was a joke. I haven't fucked any daughters in my life. Not yet, that is. I assume I will do that at some point, obviously with consent.

I indeed have a Sacred Power, though. I can just feel it in my left eye, sealed away by a dark wizard that visited me when I was but a young lass. What's a Sacred Power, you ask? Oh, you. You dummy you. You've been in my head for years. You should know. However, I'm feeling like a teacher right now, so I shall re-educate you about such matters, my cute student. Actually, you're a voice in my head, you're probably ugly. 

Sacred Power is a unique ability given by the Great Creator. Some are gifted at birth, others given after a great achievement. There are also Sacred Powers given as prizes for finishing certain Dungeons or collecting certain rare items. Each Sacred Power is one of a kind. What's mine? I have no fucking idea, but I'm sure I have one.

I'd try to find out what it is, but I'm currently preoccupied. I'm in the employ of the Queen of Hamblin as a maid. I have such a cute frilly dress, makes me feel capable of fucking a daughter. Specifically the Queen. She's constantly giving me a disgusted look, though. Almost like she can hear my thoughts. 

The Queen is in charge of Hamblin, a town at the edge of the world. Queen is more like a self-proclaimed title, though. Hamblin is a relatively affluent town since it turns out mining is really easy at the edge of the world. Just climb down and eventually you'll find exposed ore veins. It does make mining a bit riskier than it typically is, but falling into the deep dark abyss is a cooler death than choking on thick dust.

I hear the Queen is actually a Sacred Power holder. It explains her favourable position. Sacred Power holders are held in high esteem, and to claim to be one is the greatest of crimes. No one has any idea what her power is, though. She seems incredibly confident in it, so maybe it's something real crazy. I hope my Sacred Power is as powerful as hers.

"And that is why you are all fools. Is that clear?" Oh, the Queen finished monologuing. She has tied me up and had me listening to her ramblings for the past hour. I wouldn't mind it if it were in her room, but unfortunately, it's in the throne room. I'm tied up alongside a chef and a gatekeeper. Turns out those two were part of a rebellion that planned to assassinate the Queen. 

What about me? I'm just annoying. Anyone with even a drop of common sense can tell the Queen despises me and wants me gone. Why not frame me by saying I'm part of the rebellion and send me for execution along with them? No one will refute her word, not even me. I hear the execution method is being sent away by a carriage being pulled by golems into the Chaos Storm At The Edge, one of the world's 72 calamities. If that isn't exciting, I don't know what is? Long story short, she hates me and I'm insane. The insanity is self-proclaimed, but only insane people claim to be insane, so it all works out.

"Done with the insanity, maid?" Oh man, she really can hear my thoughts. Her Sacred Power really is mind reading. I'm such a genius for solving it. With that done, I'm a-okay with being executed. "Is that so? Send them off for execu-" 

Ooh, that's gotta hurt. An arrow just flew into the Queen's head. "To freedom!" yelled a voice from behind. I'm guessing the person who fired the arrow. The guards are in a panic, the two tied next to me are laughing and screaming, and me? I'm a bit saddened. Didn't get to make love to the Queen, nor sent to the Chaos Storm. Haa… the rebels are going to kill me after this too. Queen sympathiser will be the announced reason, in reality, they hate me. I did snitch on them, after all. Now that I think about it, do I even have allies? Well, whatever.

Woah, look at that. I think my delusions have reached a whole new high. I can see the Queen doesn't have her wound and is clearly pretending to be dead. Her ability to not blink is quite the thing, I tell you. We just made eye contact, and boy, those blue eyes sure are pretty.

Is this my Sacred Power? I've heard of Sacred Powers that let you learn about other Sacred Powers. What's up with the side note, though? Mushrooms? I think they're alright. As food, I should point out. No other uses. Do mushrooms have any other uses? My expertise is in tea, not food.

Has anyone else realised the Queen is alive? Ooh, she's glaring at me. I think she's realised I've realised she's alive. Time to send her a look that says I've realised that she's realised that I've realised she's alive. 

Never mind, a second arrow was shot into her head. A shame.

Character Profile: Rio "Queen" Verdeux.

Sacred Power: 1up!

Favourite drink: The tea made by that annoying maid.

Description: A selfish and sadistic queen of a criminal dump turned mining capital, she was always given preferential treatment due to her status as the daughter of Duke Lui Verdeux and as a Sacred Power Holder. Due to her nature, she wasn't fated to stick around for long. The Hamblin Guards, the Mafia, the Abyssal creatures off in the horizon and even her own father wanted her dead. She only had three people who saw her in some sort of favourable light. Her unnaturally loyal head butler, an alleged childhood friend, and a self-proclaimed insane maid.

Chapter namesake: Another One Bites The Dust by Queen.

pojlk

I got bored and made my own glossary. Why? No idea why. I'mma leave links to them here. Obviously, they hold spoilers, but feel free to have a skim. It should give you a grasp as to what Side Note entails... probably.

Important Characters
Not-So Important Characters
A Bunch of Scuffed Spreadsheets

Side Note: I have nothing else to say, I just like the idea of calling anything extra I want to say in Author Notes 'Side Note'.