It's me, Ardio, also known as the Clone Formerly Known As Shadow Madeleine Number Three, calling in from the Shadowrealm to hit you up with those big hits deep down in the Shadow Clone Mind Network Thing That We Should Really Get A Proper Name For™. For those curious, although we all know it's really only number fifty-four who wants to know, the song that was previously playing was called I'm Sorry For Sleeping With Your Partner Shadow Madeleine Number 21 by Shadow Madeleine 34. Man, 34 is one hell of a horndog, that's a sure fact. 

Another sure fact is that we really need names, so as has been announced for a few days now, please report to Mena your name so that piece of data is added to the SCMNTTWSRGAPNF™. Unlike yesterday, we had a whopping three clones report in their new names today! Let me announce them. Shadow Madeleine 40 has become Kine, apparently inspired by a mythology book from another world. I'm sure it'll help her in Bellum, which, let me remind the rest of you, is currently off-limits unless you're ordered by Physical Madeleine. Shadow Madeleine 115 has decided on Mukuro because she hung around Ava a bit too much and became a weeb. We all know what you do in your free time, Mukuro. Our thoughts are all on the SCMNTTWSRGAPNF™. Lastly, Shadow Madeleine 36 has said her name is Oceana… an all-new low for Shadow Clone name unoriginality. We get it, 36, you live on a fucking raft! Shut up and go back to crying because you don't get to fuck that hydrophobic gal.

Sorry about that, listeners. I'm just a bit irritated. Sorting through the thoughts of so many of you guys is too much, even if I'm supposed to be like you guys. I'm honestly sick of you lot. The only saving grace is that Physical Madeleine isn't connected to the SCMNTTWSRGAPNF™. Who knows how fucking weird she'd make it. 

Anyways, onto the rest of the announcements. Shadow Madeleine #1 is still missing, so like the past week, Shadow Madeleine #2 is in charge. Shadow Madeleine #22 is still requesting for someone to take over her current babysitting shift. Someone, please fill in for the poor girl, she's been stuck with those brats for two weeks. There's a plague going on in Veera, so it is advised not to visit Shadow Madeleine #48 with your partner. Lastly, the monthly Shadow Clone Ranking matches will happen soon, so those who wish to have a higher number better be training, although the number 1, 2, and 5 spots will be unavailable due to unavoidable circumstances.

With the boring stuff out of the way, let's get into the fun stuff! Let's start off with the Side Note Side Bets. For those Shadow Clones out there who are somehow listening in for the first time, Side Note Side Bets are where we Shadow Clones bet on what Sacred Power Side Note will come up next. Since it's basically guaranteed to be a loss, we've made it so if you lose, you get your bet back, but if you do win, you get everything that was put on the line. We've done this Side Bet around twenty times, and so far, no winner. 

Now, as per usual, I had Deja and her partner kidnap a random Sacred Power holder they come across during their journey, and he's right here next to me. Before we see what Sacred Power they have then let them go, let me say what the bets are and who they're from. We've got a record high of seven bets, so let's see who has what to lose.

Our usual gambler, Ava, has bet a voucher that lets the winner spend three whole weeks with her and Mammon in their home on "Disguise". Since we know how addicted to Mammon's games we Shadow Clones tend to be, what a steal. #34, who wants to be called Light but still hasn't sent in her name form like the forgetful horndog she is, has bet on "Erasure" and is putting a blessing from the Goddess of Light herself on the line. I have no idea how that'll work with us Shadow Clones, so I'm interested to see that. 

Our third bet is from me. Obviously, three is my whole thing, ignoring Darky. I'm betting on "Photokinesis", and I'm betting this cool sceptre I took from a demon I encountered when I visited Ava. Shadow Madeleine #12 has put her pet rat on the line and is betting on "Contract". For those wondering where we're getting these Sacred Powers from, a while back, Darky, using her Anarchy Sacred Power, somehow stole a list of Sacred Powers. I guess some rulebreakers won't get punished.

Continuing on, Marie has said she has the answer to everything and put that up for sale with her bet on "Beast Form". For the folks who don't bother reading the Name Document, Marie is #42. Mena, our local name reporter, has bet on "Fae Magic" and put in a simple bet of two gold, like the boring clone she is.

Lastly, and most surprising, is one of the non-Madeleine Shadow Clones. Unfortunately, it isn't the old man Mad Rox, but the insane screamer who wakes us up at night, Ark Eisen. Why did we let someone very clearly insane enter the bet? I thought it'd be funny, and anyways, with his bet, he's probably wrong. There's no way he can get it right with his state of mind. He bet on "Ripple", and as for the prize he'll give, apparently nothing since he said he'll win. According to him, Delirium guides him. Also, yes, you can enter with no bet. It's not like anyone will win this. The suspense is killing me, so I'll look into the Sacred Power holder's eyes now.

The next song is called Love Me Doris by the newly named Oceana. This was Ardio. You won't be hearing from me tomorrow. I'll be too busy crying because I lost my favourite sceptre.

Character profile: Julius Anthonio 

Sacred power: Ripple

Cause of future death: Something something chains and rocks.

Description: The Ripple Master of Mendass. Despite being a Sacred Power holder, Julius lives a normal life on his farm, tending to his fruits and veggies daily while caring for his wife and kids. In his free time, he likes to read, casually exercise, and cause tiny ripples in the coffee he drinks daily. He has thought of using his ability to rise up in the ranks of the world but usually finds himself content with his current situation. Other than a quick kidnapping which didn't last longer than a day, his life is uneventful, a rarity among Mendass natives.

Chapter namesake: Ripple by Grateful Dead

pojlk

I have just realised I really like using the Shadow Clones as filler.