Auren wiped a bead of sweat from his brow and sighed into the deep pit, several tens of feet down. The workers had dug well. He rechecked his theorized formation on his scroll, tapping on the point corresponding to the hole before him. With his memory, he didn't need to recheck any notes, his memory never failing him at any moment, but as a rule, Lord Draven imposed on him to always double-check. Auren smiled, glancing over the formation again, proud of his handiwork. He lifted a pillar and slowly lowered it into the pit as the workers shoveled the dirt back in to let the pillar settle on its base.
"Thank you!" Auren cheered to the workers, who all smiled back in return. They ran off, presumably to share a drink during their break, a common occurrence amongst the workers. He didn't understand why, but he didn't have an opinion since the construction was progressing well. With this pillar added, the formation was almost complete, probably to be finished at the end of the day. Dusting off the dirt on his clothes, Auren groaned at the mess in his tent, particularly the table. Pens scattered everywhere, leaking bits of ink on the table, papers strung along the floor toward the entrance where he stood, and the candlewax had melted and overflowed, already hardened on the table and floor.
In such a mess, he knew only one action: leave. Auren turned on his heels and didn't look back. It would be alright if he cleaned up before they arrived. Thinking of the others, he focused his gaze in the direction where they departed. Riding the great gale of the strait, they should be traveling quickly, hopefully without any unforeseen obstacles. Auren's steps crawled to a stop, a pensive look across his youthful face.
Did he hope for that? Auren frowned as his mind calculated all possibilities and angles, but he could not determine if it was better or worse for Lord Draven to have left. Or rather, was it better or worse for himself? Auren recalled when he first heard a small part of Lord Draven's plan when he journeyed to Belnicce Port. He had always known before anyone else that their lord once had a life before all of this.
'I don't understand.' He resumed walking in silence. Marcus, Eve, Santen, Kragg, Restel, and Astrid all had lives before the New Dawn captured them, lives that they seldom shared only in cryptic speech. But what about himself? He tried to remember a time before New Dawn, only to find nothing. Did someone tamper with his memory? Or perhaps…the thought sent a shiver down his spine, his heart pounding louder to warm his chilled veins. His incredible mind leaned toward the most probable and most damning theory. He never had a past before the New Dawn.
'What am I?' Auren looked at his hands as if the answer might have been written there. He saw skin, veins, muscles, proof of being human. He glanced over the incomplete buildings where workers hoisted large metal beams held by tightly bound ropes. There was no difference between him and them, not in the smiles they showed or their frustration at their mistakes. He was no different. But he felt alone as if he walked down a dark road without the guidepost that was his lord. 'My place is here with the lord and others, but if he leaves, then what do I do?'
A loud shout jolted him off his feet, coming from the large tent where his lord declared his departure. Somehow, he ended up here, of all places. The shouting carried on, and he breathed in several times in intervals, a calming exercise to prepare himself. Past the white curtains, Astrid and Eve were locked in a fierce argument, though the fierceness mostly came from Astrid's harsh tongue while Eve was silent.
"I'm saying! What the hell were we worth? Not even worth the chicken shit!" Astrid was standing and slammed her hands on the table, a layer of frost creeping over from her palms. "He promised us revenge on the New Dawn, but now he wants to leave and play house with some wench?"
"And revenge we have gotten. The bases we were housed in have been destroyed, and even more have fallen. What else do you crave for?" Eve swiped her hand gently on the table, melting the frost and drying the wood. Her gentle voice failed to calm the frustrated Astrid. "The New Dawn has gone quiet. Will you spend the rest of your years chasing after them?"
"That is what I was promised!" Astrid's voice trembled, and the air suddenly fell several degrees as if she was about to lose control. She chuckled coldly, a few octaves lower than usual, "Are you that eager to live peacefully with your man? What wishful thinking. You know that you can never–"
"That's enough," Eve stated. The tea in the cup started to boil, and Auren coughed from a dry throat, their eyes snapping to him. Eve blinked her round blue eyes, seemingly surprised, and lowered the heat. "Auren…when did you return?"
"A minute ago. Eve, can I ask you something?" Auren shifted the topic away from whatever they were discussing, noticing that Astrid's last words had touched on a sensitive matter. Though he burned with the desire to know, to be closer to his brothers and sisters, he decided against prying deeper. He took a seat after she gestured for him to come closer and waited for her reply.
"Sure. Anything for you, Auren." Eve poured some tea, the aroma smelling like burning fumes due to the earlier boil.
"I don't know. I don't know if I should be happy for Lord Draven or sad that he's leaving." Auren lowered his head, his brown hair dangling down to itch his eyes. "I don't know anything else. I only know us, nothing more. Once he leaves, that will fall apart. While he is our lord, and I want what's best for him, what about what's best for me?"
"Auren…." Eve said.
"Marcus and Eve have each other. Kragg and Restel are strange but rely on each other. Santen is Santen. Astrid wants to keep fighting. Everyone has a vision for afterward. But I don't have that." Auren sipped his tea, coughing and huffing as his tongue writhed in burning pain. "Where do I go if we all part?"
"That's your decision to make, you little brat," Astrid said, her voice domineering. "I could care less because that's what you choose. But I have an issue with our lord breaking his promise. If not for that, I wouldn't care if he ran off." She broke her teacup, chunks of ice flying out.
"Auren, when you are the happiest?" Eve knelt and gathered the shards one by one, plucking them off the floor.
"Serving him. I won't make formations or calculate for anyone else." Auren declared. A hint of pride welled up in him as he answered.
"Then why don't you go to Convecia City?" Eve chuckled gently, like a mother's laughter.
"Wasn't I ordered to stay here?" Auren pointed at himself.
"And if you believe we're all parting afterward, why not get a headstart? Go if you believe your place is by our lord's side. The formation is almost finished, isn't it?" Eve said, throwing away the pieces of the teacup. She smiled brightly and patted his head. "It's ok to be selfish. You, out of everyone, deserve to do as you wish."
"But–" Auren wanted to retort.
"Ah, just go!" Astrid snapped. "And when you see him, keep annoying him to convince him to come back. A promise is a promise." She waved him off as if to shoo him away, a flash of tiredness flickering across her pale face.
"Then…I will go!" Auren bowed to the two of them. "Thank you for your advice. And Astrid, don't worry. I'm sure our lord will not forsake us."
"Talkative brat." Astrid snorted.
"Go on, Auren. If you hurry up, you'll catch up to them." Eve hugged him and pecked him on the cheek.
He ran outside, eager to follow, renewed by their encouragement. Eastward, he looked where the calm waves fluttered like blue curtains under a soft breeze, and the clouds parted as if to show him the path forward. Radiant light showered down, the faint shadows from glancing at the clouds accenting their brightness. It reminded him of his first-ever memory when he opened his eyes to see his lord under the sunlight that poured from the gaping hole in the ceiling. Indeed, there was no one else to be beside.
"Excuse me? Geez, I came here to look for someone, but I can't sense a hint of him at all. Do you happen to know?" A sudden voice intruded on his memory, vibrant yet chillingly colder than Astrid's. He froze, unable to muster a word against the figure who swerved over to meet him face to face. Her white armor, light and mostly leather with metal at the joints, reflected the two suns at his face, but he could see a frighteningly beautiful woman, her blonde hair tightly bound into a side braid. A pair of violet eyes, shockingly clear, drew in his gaze.
"Hello?" She snapped her fingers several times and sighed dramatically. "Geez, did I end up asking a mute?" Auren wanted to speak, but his body refused to follow his will. Fear rooted his feet to the ground and shut his mouth. The woman stepped closer, and her brow twitched as an icicle suddenly landed where she stood.
"New Dawn…don't think I don't remember you! Sirsi Volten!" Astrid pulled Auren back and tossed him into Eve's embrace. What did she say? Auren widened his eyes, shocked to hear a New Dawn member had gotten so close.
"Former New Dawn. I'm now against them." The woman, identified as Sirsi, shrugged. "Geez, it's a wonder that you're still alive. I thought you would have frozen yourself to death by now. And that woman. Is that you, little Eve?" She chuckled. "I'm not here for you. I'm here for him." She showed an image of Lord Draven. "All this time, I heard about a group that had been demolishing New Dawn bases at a frightening speed. Good work is what I wanted to say, but you messed with too many. However, I'm glad to know he's still alive."
Sirsi smiled widely. "Where is he?"
