I was home. 

It had been  so long but now I was here again, after having changed so much.

I barely needed the glamour charm anymore. And all I had thought about was my parents.

I took the step forward to meet them again fooooooooooo

The world surges around me with the first step, warping,  I could feel the vast cavITATION ripple out behind me leaving a trail.

I look down and I’m him again.  The old boy.  The first me.  He is talking to… dad? 

The thing looks like my father. But Something is Wrong. 

There is no light in his eye. The man who helped with so many things growing up, who taught me how to fish and shoot a slingshot was not there. 

He opens his mouth and the words all come pouring out at once as a single molten blob of hateful misery, hitting me across my center, burning my skin and muscles away to the  bone,  all of it barely connected by anything as my stomach clenches, trying to keep itself from falling out of me.

“I’m sorry but I can’t accept this.”  The words crawled themselves out of his mouth in a visible, ichorous blob. “Do you know what these people's lives are like?” Each sentence and word swirling as physical, burning magma, hotter than anything I had ever felt in my entire life as it hit me square in the chest. “I live in my own skin.”

My skin sears as the burning words render me unable to turn, to run away.  My feet are fused to the floor. I can’t scream. I can’t cry. Men don’t cry. Boys tough it out. I have to be his son. I am not being given any other choice. 

And then all he does is stare at me. Like I’m the one upsetting him. 

Dad grows unfathomably large as  we sit in silence. Taking up everything in my view, his stature swallowing the sky. 

“If you’re going to come here I can’t have you doing any of this.”

His mouth was filled with the shards of broken windows as  he leered at me. 

My chest felt empty. The last moments it was capable of keeping me alive.

Out of my fathers open empty chest cavity the sounds of click clacking high heels echoed out and into my ears, my mouth long fusing shut under the sweltering heat of disgust and betrayal…

“I can’t have you do this.” My dads words and voice echoed out of her mouth. 

Astriel. The Woman in The Pink Coat. 

My chest seized as my shoulder jerks in an attempt to cough to keep me alive for just a minute longer as she brings up My Staff. Hazel’s Staff. The Staff that had stopped demons and kept me and everyone safe. The most treasured thing I’ve ever had. 

She holds it above her head with both hands. 

Brings it down over her knee. 

***

My eyes snap open as I wake up, staring at the wall, breathing hard and fast. 

I lurch forward out of bed. Staring at the night stand. The staff is still there. I avert my glance. The hat is still there. The cape is still there. Both hanging peacefully off a rack by the door. 

What should have come was relief, what came was…

Something shook through my whole core and I sobbed. Scared. What came was Fear. 

I’d sit there for the next hour trying to ignore everything. The fading nightmare. My self doubt. My fear of rejection. 

 

Ick.

 

Chapter 11

Here There be Dragons

The end of the week had come, I had a pack full of simple supplies for a camping trip; bedroll, blanket, staff, and a slingshot I bought at a shop in town. I had one when I was a kid. It was good for hitting varmints and voles that got too close to the house. The slingshot in the shop called out to my nostalgia, and I answered it back. 

The camping trip was planned about a week in advance. Soon it would be too cold to do much outside. Harvest would have been well and truly finished at home by this point.  

“If you’re going to really be a witch like I was, you gotta know how to survive out in the wilds.” The justification. In truth we were delivering some goods to a friend who lived across the woods from Hazel's. It would take more than a single day on foot, and Hazel insisted it would be good for me. 

My sleeping habits had been really messed up the past week. Weird dreams and nightmares. All of them barely remembered. I’d manage to make it through classes, handle things in the Gardening Club and then I’d pass out the second I got home until Calamity forced me up and awake to eat something. Usually, noodles.

So maybe this would help.

The woods were a little more quiet than normal; I would have often heard the chirping of birds, and the occasional animal call off in the distance. It was too close to town for them to want to be seen, but they were there. The coming cold had sent them all off migrating or setting up for hibernation. 

Under my shoes the leaves crackled heavily over the beaten path.

The way to Hazel’s house felt like going home. The house was full of strange little oddities and paintings accompanied by the smell of baking or cooking, or brewing of tea. I’d feel weird if I compared her to a mother, but Hazel might have qualified as some sort of aunt figure. 

Or some vaguely distant “might as well be family” kind of label. She was waiting outside for me that day as I approached. Hazel adjusted the cuffs of her pants, almost looking like a turtle with the size of her backpack.. Rather than her usual red skirt and grey vest she wore a much more lightly colored pair of trousers and matching jacket 

“You look all set… I made sure to pack two spare blankets in case it gets too cold tonight.” 

“And I got marshmallows!” I declared, grinning proudly. 

“Oh yeah, I got a good feeling about this adventure.” She planted her fists on each hip in pride. “You’re shaping up to be a great apprentice!” 

My grin reflected her pride right back at her.

After a little more fussing around and some forgotten things (despite knowing the spell, she insisted we needed a spark kit) we started off, finding one of the paths that lead off away from town behind Hazel’s house. 

I had a good feeling about this, too. 

***

Two hours, it was two hours before Calamity caught up to us. 

Unfortunately, Calamity was not part of the plan. 

It wasn’t a secret I was doing an “apprenticeship” sort of thing with Hazel, and I’d never made it a secret. Honestly, up until that point it had almost seemed like Calamity wasn’t interested in many of the interests I’d developed in the couple of months I’d been here. 

I was into gardening and foliage, and she was into fashion and metalsmithing. 

We obviously still had a lot of ground in common; reading books together, going on walks along the riverwalk. We were still best friends but there was still this weird feeling of her being distant since… you know. The moment alone on the rooftop.

Where we kissed. 

Everytime I thought about the kiss I was gripped by that feeling. The flying, the landing… hand in hand…

Why did that still make me feel complicated? What happened was okay. So why did it feel-

When I saw Calamity, there was an elated rush of excitement, the smile creeping along my face as she dropped, unexpectedly, out of the trees above us as Hazel and I made our way down the dusty forest path. 

“Found you!” Calamity grinned to mask her grimace at the exertion of the landing, finding her balance quickly. “Owe me a lemonade!”. 

“I don't remember making any agreements to a hide and seek,” I said, only flinching just a second.

“Well, you should have paid attention better. So…” she paused, “who’s the old crone?” 

When I turned to look Hazel was already on top of the both of us, looking Calamity over intently before holding a finger “One, I’m only in my thirties, and two…” She looked at me with expectation  holding up the second finger, “Who’s your friend?” 

“Oh. This is Calamity,” I started, “she’s pretty much the reason I’m properly enrolled at the school.” I inverted the introduction. “And this is Hazel. She’s, you know… the witch from the story, from when I was a kid.” 

Calamity looked at Hazel with a bit of a wide eyed expression before it calmed down. “I thought she’d be taller.” 

“I meaaan she was at some point, I mean when I was a kid she was taller.” 

“I am right here.” Hazel enforced her presence to the both of us. “Interesting name you got there Calamity.” 

“Took it from my grandmother.” 

“Curious.” 

There was an odd tension, and I couldn’t shake that something weird was happening. 

“So why’d you follow us?” Hazel pried a little more. We all started walking again. The silence of the forest wormed its way into every pause between us.. 

“Oh. Just… exploring the woods. Kinda got a bit side tracked you know?” 

“So… accidentally exploring the woods?” 

“Basically.”

“Okay kid, what are you lying about?” 

“Nothing, why?” 

“You’re answers are too quick, no elaboration, you’re talking like you're trying to run away from something.” 

“Why would I be running away from something?” 

“Because I can see three burly men, one with a club behind us.” She walked forward past the two of us. 

As Hazel said that I realized what was happening. 

“Calamity what did you do?” 

“Nothing!” she turned around nervously, “but we probably should move.” 

The three of us quickly began moving with swift motions trying to shift from one place among the trees to another as we navigated around the group of people hunting for Calamity. 

Of course the day Calamity would be hunted by vengeful killers on the day she and Hazel would finally meet. 

Grudges. They really gotta mess with your mind.  

Each one of us darted between massive trees. Almost far enough away to be safe. Grouped up again as we followed Hazel closely.

“We’re gonna find you sooner or later. Your dad owes us!” one of the men called out, the voice carried with it years of unenviable rage that hung heavy in the air. 

The three men were imposing as their figures moved through the forest. Unaware of the reality they were about to be left alone in the leaves. “Where the hell are you, Fissure?!”

Hazel’s upper half spun, eyes wide, and looking directly at Calamity, her prosthetic hand held up in a way that couldn’t be mistaken for anything but actively predicting danger. “You’re Cragjaw’s kid?!”The accusation rang out like a crackling thunderbolt. 

The tone of her voice made me feel my soul trying to leave my body. 

Fur bristled, she pulled back, claws and bright fangs shown. The flight instinct gone with her now poised to leap into Hazel. “Yeah, wanna make something of it?” The sudden hostility in Calamity made my face heat up even worse. A shared fury in the eyes of the two most important people in my life.

If I could have just died right there… in that moment my mind reeled as I lost all track of anything that could be worse than this.

And then, my mind snapped back to the present. There was in fact actually a thing that was actively worse.

“We are being hunted by violent lunatics right now!” my voice clawed its way out of my throat.

A nearby rattling caught our attention as something rolled to a stop between all three of us. 

I looked down to find this terrifying ball of terracotta covered in a tableau of runes I couldn’t identify. 

They were glowing. 

“Goblin Grenade!” Everything flashed white as Hazel grabbed me, pulling my face away as the ground beneath me tremored. The wave of air from the blast made my feet forget the grounds hold on them

The world whirled around me like someone was spinning a pottery wheel underneath my feet, I could feel myself going-

 

***

 

I don't know how long I was unconscious. Seconds? Minutes? The ringing slowly faded away as I looked onward at… purple leaves on trees? How hard did I hit the ground? I looked up at the tree I’d been resting on, looking up to see branches with fingers, waving in a way that seemed to greet me from my unwanted nap.

When I came to, I could hear Hazel and Calamity bickering. 

“And you just thought they’d leave you alone?” 

“Every one before them were the sort to get frustrated and leave, how was I supposed to know these guys were militant?”

“Here I would have thought your dad would have taught you better!” 

“Don’t you talk about my-” I tuned it all out for a moment as I pushed myself up. My pack was… away somewhere? Staff! A foot away from me, shoved into the ground.

The grass caught my eye. The green was… off. Brighter than normal. 

“Oh shit, she’s awake!” Calamity darted at me, grabbing me in a hug. 

“Don’t bump into her so hard, I don't know if she’s concussed!” 

The hug was everything I needed at that moment. My arms instinctively grabbed around her and held her against me. 

“Okay, okay, break it up a second okay?” Hazel got on one knee, “everything feel okay? Any numbness? Tingling?” 

“I think I’m fine…” I said as she grabbed the sides of my head, looking into my eyes, turning me one way and the other. 

Hazel leaned in close enough I could make out little flecks of gold in the orange of her eyes as she inspected me “Okay, good.” She stood up “Good news… We survived getting thrown across a large distance by a goblin grenade.” 

“Goblin grenade?”

“An explosive flask filled out with scraps and hope,” Calamity answered.

“The bad news, the explosion sent us through a Fairy Gate.”

I imagined myself sorting through the library inside my head trying to sort through what little the academy told me about Fairy Gates. Grandma told me never to stand in a circle of lily’s and mushrooms. And we’d always been warned about staircases in the middle of nowhere, but apart from that I drew a blurry blank. 

“We were going to end up having to make a brief intercession through the Fae Dominions on our trip but I was hoping it wouldn’t have to be so soon.”

“Intercession? You mean short cut right?” Calamity interjected

“... Yes.” 

“That's not even the correct context for that word.”

A sigh of annoyance from Hazel. “Shut up, I’m being a wise mentor.” 

Hazel took a step forward, looking in every which way there was ahead of us, “We’ll be fine. I just gotta take a moment to figure out who runs the place. But we can probably get a good start, your pack is over there Roxanne.” 

“Got it.” I finally stood up on my legs, dusting off and moving to grab my pack.. My eyes lingered on the distant woods. 

Calamity’s worry broke through my thoughts, “Place is giving me the creeps…”

“Just stay close together,” Hazel responded, “Fae Dominions aren’t that bad when you know what to look for.” 

“Well, what are we looking for?” 

“Usually some sort of castle. Mansion. Better still, an archway that might lead us out of here” 

I felt my spine go rigid with cold as a childish giggle echoed across the treetops. 

I stared up above us, “Uh..” 

“Don’t worry about it.” 

The next several minutes stretched onward as we followed Hazel. The trees shimmering as we watched the sun move across the sky but never seeming to reach any horizon line.  

Hazel pondered and pulled out something. A single cinnamon stick. She cracked it in her hand and tossed both pieces in separate spaces, one in front, one in back. 

“I’m going to need the both of you to focus on me. Don't look at the sticks… something is off, and we are going to test it.”

I could feel something in the air. A pushing and pulling. 

“Don't move,” Hazel demanded. 

“What the hell?” Calamity’s voice echoed as she pointed to one half of the cinnamon on the ground. “It’s not broken anymore?”

I looked to the opposite end of the clearing we were in…and the other half was missing. I turned around and there it was. Sure as could be. Unbroken. 

“We are in a place, where time and reality… are very thin…” Hazel's voice was deathly serious. 

“Yeah this… doesn’t look at all like the kinds of Fae Domains that my dad’s books talk about.” 

We walked forward and listened, observing the peculiar sites. The plants were full of color, bright hues and massive petals. The trees above had swollen fruits ready to plummet to the ground. 

They reminded me of some of the more rare oddities in the Garden Club greenhouse. The things that were hidden away in a separate section of the building only viewable past glass walls and doors. Things that looked like they’d eat you if you turned your back. 

The stories of the Fae Realms were full of wonder… and horror. 

Some of the plants looked strange, almost too healthy. It drew to mind the notion of invasive species that thrived in overabundance at the expense oflocal ecology. 

“We’re looking at a domain in transition… either a Lord or Lady has molted and their new form is reshaping things, or we’re walking through the space between two opposing dominions.” 

“So what do we do?” Me and Calamity asked simultaneously, causing my ears to vibrate from the synchronicity. 

“Simple; Move forward. We don’t talk to anyone, we don’t eat anything, you know the full range of precautions. No gifts, never give honest answers to any specifically worded questions.” Hazel pulled up the shoulder straps of her pack. “Wherever we are, the Lord or Lady knows we’re here and will no doubt be sending someone to greet us.” 

We knew about some “outsiders” ... at least as far as I knew what Hazel said was basic stuff from the classes at the academy, though it was still only the basics..

“So then why not barter safe passage home?” Calamity asked as we all started walking.

“Because Fae don't think in terms of fairness. They only see tools, objects, playthings. They’ll move immediately to bargain. It will always be weighed in their favor if you don't know how to be clever…. and I’m not a clever woman. I’m a crafty witch. So we move swiftly. We leave the way we came. Through an archway.” 

“Now, you’re speaking my language.” Calamity grinned. 

“I’ll take that flattery then, Fissure.” 

I felt a gnawing worry. The sensation of being watched through the foliage very rapidly pulled at my mind. 

“The plants look unhealthy,” I said out loud. “Or well… like some of them are being choked at the roots,” I pointed out. After I said it, it became true. That sickly over-ripeness I had noted earlier had been replaced with sickly decline. Had it been true before I said it?

“It appears this is a realm in transition… This makes the whole thing more volatile.  She took a moment and looked directly at a flower “I think this flower is as big as a tree.” with that the flower immediately shot up, expanding in height and width, the texture of soft greenery become far more pronounced in it’s stem, the bulb leaning and drooping forward as the petals practically hung above us like curtains.

I tried to suppress a giggle at the absurd sight. A moment of pleasantness in the uncertainty of everything

And then a roar echoed from off in the distance, pulling us back to the simply reality that we were in a space where dangers tread.  

“Bandersnatch…” Calamity mumbled. 

Hazel corrected her, “No… that was too deep for a bandersnatch. That’s gotta be bigger.” She then looked at all the foliage again. “Wait… you’re right, Roxanne…” She walked up to another purple flower, its wilting petals lanced with a color that looked like… looked like…

Her fingers just barely, painfully, almost touched those delicate petals. 

 

There wasn’t a name for that color. 

 

She turned to face me again. “I don’t like this...” Hazel’s voice grew even more concerned. “Come on, let’s get moving,” she hastened her pace.

We were luckily on as beaten a path as we had back in the real world. I didn’t know if this path had a lot of traffic or if the magic of the realm just made the path that way. Could we even trust the path? 

The roar happened again. 

It was closer. 

“Hazel? What is that?” I tried not to panic, looking to the sky.

“I have a theory, but I don’t wanna be right,” She motioned us over to a turn. “Trust your inner knowing,” she said out loud. Was that for us? Or for her?

The roar again. Something big flew overhead. The plants all shuddered, some of them curling in on themselves as if the very forest was afraid of the intruder. 

“Did you see that?!” Calamity seemed more excited than worried. 

“Shh! Heads down!” Hazel pulled Calamity down into a crouching position, with myself following as quickly as I could. All of us, watching. 

Oh…

It had multiple wings and a long body. Scales? Or plates? It moved too fast to see properly, it was gone by then.

“The third thing I was afraid of,” Hazel mumbled. 

“What is it?” my ears vibrated again as me and Calamity spoke in unison again. 

“Dragon.” 

My gut twisted. “What?” 

“Oh.” It was the first time Calamity ever showed a hint of worry in the entire time I’d known her. 

 

This was bad. 

 

Hazel led us forward, the gemstone finger in her prosthetic glowing full force. “Sometimes…very rarely, a God will take a human guise… and sometimes… even rarer still, that God will stumble into the dominions of the Fae… and more rarer still they will…. get to know one another. A dragon is what happens after. All the powers but none of the rules.”

“That's what the flowers were…” The thought came out unbidden. 

“So much magic that comes off one creature, it leaks out into everything like a far too big drop of paint into a cup of water.” Hazel said. 

The roar sounded off directly above us. 

The Thing landed down quickly. So much of it was… arms? Feelers? No… too much of it moved to get a feel for its details. Its colors are deep and blood-like, ink that made it stand out in the world too vibrantly.

Hazel immediately pushed herself back onto the two of us and I felt the sizzling heat of teleportation magic grab the three of us. 

We found ourselves somewhere else.

“Shit!” Hazel panicked. We were in the same opening we were in at the start, “I couldn’t think of anywhere else and it just threw us backwards!” 

“What do we do?” 

Hazel turned around to face us. “Whatever you do just… try not to fight it, it’s infinitely more powerful than all of us. It’s… well… just…” Her breath was out as she clung to her side with her good arm. “Just… whatever you do don’t-” 

Her face pulled into grimace in a way that looked like she was going to vomit. Her mouth stretched open in reaction to a sensation overwhelming her that I could only just barely imagine..

 

And then in an instant Hazel ceased. Her body dissolved into a collection of multicolored moths that all scattered in one direction or another. 

 

I screamed. 

 

Somewhere in the mayhem Calamity grabbed me and tugged me into the dense criss cross of overgrown plants. I could feel the leaves brushing my skin, a thorn tearing my clothes here and there. Finger-like branches touching and trying to touch

We found ourselves in a new clearing? Or the same clearing?! The environment looked like a tessellating kaleidoscope, like it would fold in or out over us. I was claustrophobic… or was it overwhelmed? The emotions clashed heavily across my mind.

This was the farthest I’d ever been from home. 

Calamity shuddered, trying to collect her breath, stumbling forward ahead of me. “Right… okay. So we can’t fight it, we can’t outrun it. What the fuck are we supposed to do-OH NO!” she shrieked as I saw the thick ‘inklines’ pulse into reality around her, its body overshadowing hers then rapidly the Dragon was simply in her spot. Or she was inside it? 

 

My best friend was gone. 

 

My heart thumped and I felt an all surrounding panic grow as I realized just how absolutely dead I was in this exact moment. 

It roared again, a trilling, clicking sound as it leaned in, its body moving far too fluidly to be real. 

I shuddered and held my staff in front of me, looking away from it as it hissed… Its hot breath making me dizzy with instinctual fear. 

“Boop!” I felt a sudden tap on my ear. 

“Boop?” 

I looked back and…the Dragon was… gone?

Standing in its place was a small child. Couldn’t have looked any older than nine? Maybe ten.

“Hello!” 

I felt legs give out, quickly pushing my staff into the ground letting the sturdy wood hold me up. “Uh… hi.”

The kid was shocking; baggy clothes, a giant hood with lots and lots of teeth decorating it attached to an all together very large red shirt. 

“You seemed waaay nicer than the other two… you didn’t say anything mean about me!” It’s… his? Their? Voice was so… young. 

It spoke again, “What’s your name?” 

“Uh… I’m-” remembering Fae operated on weird rules with names, fear blotted over the exact memory but just enough to remember not to give my full name “...Roxie.” 

“My parents named me-” The name was not human, and it vibrated its way through my body as if I had been shocked by a doorknob.

I hesitated. “I… uhm… Can I give you a nickname?” 

The Child smiled with toothy delight, “I’ve never had one of those!” 

There was a second of hesitation and I just said something out loud, “What do you think about Coda?”

“Coda…”The light shone off vibrant yellow skin as they bounced around on happy feet, clawed toes showing under the cuffs of pant legs. “Yeah yeah yeah!”

“So… what should I refer to you as?”

The bouncing stopped as they looked up at me. “What do you mean?” The child that had once been such an imposing monster tilted its head at me inquisitively.

Shoot. “Well, should I think of you as a he? A she? They even?”  

The Child moved into a sitting position, its head remaining in the same space while standing thanks to how they could float. “I’m not sure, what’s the difference?”

“I- well… a lot… but… like...” I’d never had to summarize this stuff. “You know about a mom and a dad… like think she is like a mom, and he is like a dad.” 

“Well I’m not old enough to be either of those.” 

I blinked and dared to ask the question, “How old are you?” 

“I’m-” a number that was a sound that felt like something scratching its way in my ears, every single inch of my skin covered in bumps in reaction to that.

“Ah. Well that's probably older than me.” 

“You seem pretty old…” Coda started walking towards me slowly. “But what are you?” 

“Well…I’m a girl; she’s and her’s and all that.” 

“Ooooh~” the sound reverberated across the forest trees making the leaves seem to giggle… or was it ice crackling against each other? “Well… I dont think I’m any of those.” 

I turned to face this kid again as he walked around me. “Well. how about this. We’ll do two…I call you a he and a they then?” 

He tilted his head back and forth a bit, swaying, the stitched tail hanging off his hoodie seeming to sway..which made sense since it was probably real. “I like that I think, for now!” he added. 

It was weird to be talking so casually to the kid, I still still didn’t know what happened to Calamity and Hazel, but how was I supposed to even approach questioning him about it? At least he wasn’t actively hostile. for now. 

“Are you a giant?” 

“I’m a witch.” 

“Ooh! Aunt talked about people like you!” He grinned happily “what magic do you know?” 

“Uh… well.” Thinking quickly, I puffed out my chest with as much confidence I could simulate through the anxiety in my gut. “Let me show you!”  

I held up my staff and focused… something simple. I squeezed the staff in one hand and leaned forward, my free hand moving in a plucking motion. I willed the energy. Strings of magic creating a gentle thrumming in the air as I picked the ‘strings’ the sound causing the air at my fingertips to start thickening with frost, a cloud underneath my fingers as the simple tune of small scale weather manipulation. Soon heavy snow flakes began to drift down out of the miniature cloud, my fingers making the sounds of a quiet winter morning that seemed to pull the focus of the woods around me. 

“What's that?” The whisper of wonder.

“You’ve never seen snow before?”

Coda shook their head, his hair and hood shaking around as he did so “The Seelie don’t like the idea of it. Least it’s what my Aunt says.”

Oh… Oh right. I… did not have the privilege to worry about what the consequences could be when I was dealing with Coda the Dragon. 

I puppeteered the snow cloud up above Coda’s head and let him feel the snow move above them. A giggle of excitement as he felt the cool flakes gather in his hair. 

They seemed to have taken a liking to me, at least for now. 

I felt a sense of pleasure in the awe I’d created… a memory of Hazel surrounded by me and the kids when I was a child, she’d created a miniature sun… the demon had made the village so dark and murky and yet she had taken a moment after killing the monster to make sure we were all happy. 

I felt the pride in being a little bit like Hazel, even if I wasn’t recreating the same scene fully… and I was still handling the “monster.” 

And the monster was also a kid. Oh well. 

There was only going to be so long I could keep him entertained with the snow though. 

“Do you want to play a game?” I suggested. 

He snapped out of the rhythmic swinging of his head and looked up at me “yeah!” the open mouth grin showed off… A lot of teeth.

I swallowed a squeak and grinned back “Alright,” I started, “You know how to play hide and seek?” 

“Yeah, yeah yeah!” The forest seemed to shake with his excitement as he spun around with his arms up in the air above his head. 

“Awesome! So you count… and I’ll find a spot to hide!” 

He nodded quickly and shoved his whole face into his arms, counting. The numbers were impossible things, a tone of voice that carried authority as if directing the flow of time in the area more than just following. There was a moment where I looked at the child, gripped by a sinking awareness that in spite of his current appearance he was still something far beyond the scope of my understanding. Far beyond the scope of here. 

Existential worry later. There was a game to play. Thoughts to consider, rules to understand. Loved ones to remake, like a broken cinnamon stick being made whole.

I shoved my staff into the pouch on my side and darted off. Quick to find a hiding spot that didn’t also look alive, some of the branches and bushes looked like beckoning hands that eagerly hoped they could hold me closely. 

I also wanted the hiding spot to be not too difficult. I was committed to the act now. The knot in my stomach argued with me about how absolutely outlandish it was to be playing a game with something that seemed to have for all purposes killed my mentor and ate my best friend. 

The rational part of my mind knew I’d have to parlay some sort of way home, lest I be trapped in an infinite rotation of play. A less rational part wanted me to try and avenge Calamity and Hazel. My heart thudded a little every time I thought about the fact that Calamity was… and I hadn’t even sorted out my feelings. 

“Ready or not, here I come!” I heard Coda yell from off in the distance. I ducked behind a dead tree with wilted arms and empty hands. 

I exhaled, taking the moment to rest as I rested my hand on the tree and- a tap on my shoulder.

“Found you!” it had been less than a second. Time and space are very thin here. And he had the home field advantage. 

I tried to remember some of the words Hazel had said. Trust your inner knowing. 

 

Coda was a kid. 

 

I thought about things I wished I could ask Hazel when I was a kid. An encounter with a witch isn’t rare…but it is not common. 

“I got another game then,” I said. And signaled for him to follow me. “Come on.If you’d like… I’ll answer questions you have. As best as I can…” 

He nodded as he followed beside me. 

“You’re mortal, right?” 

“Yeah.” I said “kind of a rough thing, but I live with it.” 

“Why can’t you be not that?” he asked as we made our way back to… of course. That same clearing. I imagined that the way this domain was, it was just going to slide us along in a looping path until Coda let us leave and the traditional rules of the domain reasserted itself. 

It was a tougher question than it sounded, especially for a witch. I considered it heavily before answering. “Well…Some things in life you can’t change. I read stories of people who can’t die, and they never end so well.” 

“But if they’re not mortal, then how could they have an end?”

The question made me stop to think. He wasn’t a human… so obviously they wouldn’t think about- “Well, it’s not that the ‘people’ end. It’s the stories about them that tend to end badly. All the stories are told by mortals, and all the mortals end.” All I could do was hope I was putting it into concepts Coda could understand. 

“Oh…” there was a sad note in the reaction. But quickly followed with “why does it end badly? Immortal people could just make other people immortal too. I think that's what I’d do.”

My brow furrowed as I reflected on it. “People tend to argue it leads to, well…” I scratched my head “Nothing changing? People are averse to a lack of change. Though now that I say that… people are also averse to change.” I caught myself. “I think you have me stumped a bit on that. All I know is people say it’s bad to not have things you can change. And just to accept what you can change, and to try and know the difference when you can see it.

He seemed to take that in as thoughtfully as he could. the next question came, “what can you change?”

I thought about a few things. “Well… hair, physical attributes… sometimes when you figure out what isn’t right for you, you just change them how you can. Can you make a ball?”

He nodded, moved to clap their hands and in that instance a ball that appeared very much like rubber manifested in his grip. 

“Bounce it to me.” I instructed, patiently. Calmly. Imitating the tone I knew Uriel would use it for me and other students.

He bounced the ball at the ground between us, it hit the ground, and bounced up at me. And I caught it. 

I was… a little concerned about the… design pattern. Calamity and Hazel were illustrated in silly illustrations in interlocking repeating patterns on the ball. Each one with a smile painted on their faces as they repeated across the ball's surface. They were still here, in some way. They hadn’t been forgotten by this place. By Coda.

I tried to remember that the unease was from the differences in everything.

Coda followed up with another question, “So what have you changed about yourself?” 

I bounced the ball back, the thought passed through me. When I was his age… I just wanted adults to be honest. “Well. I was a lot like you when I was your age… then I decided I wanted to be a girl.”

“You can do that?” 

“Of course!” I smiled, “with the right type of magic, you can do anything!” I caught the ball with ease. “And I believe magic can change the world…” 

Something clicked in my head. Flashing back to the first day at Aron’s academy, The first lesson taught by Professor Hebden in that first class that had felt like so long ago. 

The Witch’s Gambit. 

I smiled a little wider. Magic can change the world. That was my Gambit. With the right magic, anything was possible. 

We passed the ball back and forth. A lot of Coda’s questions were simple. 

“Who can be a witch?” Anyone. 

“Were there bad witches?” Yeah, but they have no friends. He giggled at that. 

More questions. Lots of questions. Having been one before I knew kids practically held their shape with all the questions they were filled with. 

The next one….

 

“Could I be a witch when I’m your age?” 

 

There was a warm feeling that bubbled out in my chest. A lump in my throat. I was now on the other side of my childhood. I remembered the sting of ‘boy’s can’t be witches’  .

I sat the ball down and walked close. Kneeling down to Coda’s eye level and put one hand on his shoulder, “Absolutely. It takes work. But you absolutely can.” 

Coda smiled at that. 

There was a yawing motion beyond the canopy above us as the light in the sky went strange. It was sunset now. Or something approaching it.

Despite my understanding that the ground was well trodden dirt, I still heard the sound of… what sounded like heels on metal? Wood? 

“There you are. I was beginning to think you’d been eaten!” The voice sounded like the rain on a warm summer’s evening with no wind.

“Auntie —!” the name was like the sensation of ice under foot. Coda ran off to her as I looked up at a… definitely a woman. Tall. maybe as big as my house back home in Olmsteady. A dress that was dark, but didn’t look like fabric, and seemed like something could fall out of (or into) it. Skin that was equally yellow as Coda’s. And long green hair that moved as if it was underwater. 

“I made a new friend!” Coda smiled as they were picked up by their Auntie. 

“Oh is that so?” she smiled. I don’t know if the friendliness was false or real. I don’t know if I was just numb to the fear or not but I kept up the pleasantries and smiled as I greeted her, “And what by chance do you call yourself, Human.” 

“I… simply refer to myself as Roxie. Miss.” 

“Ooh. And you know your manners.” She looked to the child held in her arms “You’ve made a very good friend today.” 

“She gave me a nickname too!” 

“And she gifted you a name! How lovely!” 

“She named me Coda,” he said with that grin. 

Her voice took a somewhat deeper tone that claimed a regality to it “Oh what a wonderful name to have ownership of.” 

“She’s a really nice witch!” 

Auntie turned and looked at me. Eyes that were infinitely deep. In them I saw the birth of stars. And the end of planets. Whole other worlds lost within. I could have cried, but I couldn’t look away. “A witch who knows her manners and kept my nephew company for a whole day? Why…” There was a strange moment as the world grew silent “That deserves a favor. You would agree, yes Coda?” Hearing her say the name I’d given him felt like a strange cementing of the world. They would carry that name until they ceased. Or claimed something new. 

“She’s amazing, Auntie.”

Auntie smiled. The world felt like it had reduced to just the three of us in a void of empty white space as though being written onto a page. Constructs to be read as an agreement on a document. 

“Would you like anything of me, Roxie, To whom has taken good care of the child of my sister.” 

The letter whirled around between us as I breathed in deep. Choosing my words carefully. “Yes, Ma’am” But I didn’t say ma’am. Her Name. Lady Astovair, left my lips in the language of the Fae… A language I did not speak, yet spoke the same. 

I continued “When I first met Coda, there was a bit of a mistake. And my friends… I lack the words so I simply will show you” I calmly picked up the ball again, showing off the interlocking patterns of Calamity My beloved, and Hazel, My Mentor. 

The thoughts of how they used to be came through in my head unfiltered. Lady Astovair had done something. No dishonesty could be created at this moment.  

What I knew of the Fae through the academy and passively thought about what Hazel had said to me, I knew I’d need to be careful in the request. But yet… I felt I knew exactly what to say. “I care deeply for the two of them. And they meant no harm. We come from outside this place. Dragons, and Fae are seen as adversarial in nature. If you offer a Favor to me for the act of keeping Coda safe. I simply ask that you restore them to their original state as they were before we met.”

Her Eyes met mine “You are humble. And care for others more so than yourself.” The ball vanished from my hands “Your friends will meet you outside this realm. The Lord of this domain is a rival of mine. You will need to move fast for I can offer no help beyond this boon.”

“Yes, Lady Astovair.” 

Everything immediately snapped back into “normal” and the tension vanished.  

“A favor… and a gift. Much like this little one… I’m not bound by their rules… you’ll understand soon.” 

The Dragon Woman with a Dragon nephew. 

“Now… let's go get dinner.” Lady Astovair spoke to Coda. She turned and walked off. That strange sound as she walked away. 

I hear a knock, pulling my attention away. 

When I looked behind me, Hazel was standing there framed inside of a doorway that seemed to just exist openly, “Aha! Good Guesses work everytime. Now get out here quick before some more weird stuff happens.” 

I charged through the door, hugging her as we stumbled out. I heard the door behind me close. “Hey hey hey! Too tight… but-” she hugged me back. “You did good, Roxanne.” 

I felt my body tremble as the sensation of fear finally caught up and felt the tears rolling out. 

“I… didn’t like that at all.” I heard Calamity from nearby say aloud. Before anything else I was already on her clinging tightly.

She hugged back. It felt right. 

 

My beloved. 

 

Hazel looked up to the sky. Night had come. “You know what… I don't think I'm much for camping as I thought I was. Come on… I’ll start a bonfire at my house and we can just… camp there.”

“I think you're my new favorite adult, Miss Hazel.” 

“Oh, I’m a Miss now!” she smirked back at Calamity as I finally let go. My hand immediately went to grab hers, finding comfort in the way she squeezed back. Gods… I needed that. 

Calamity chuckled nervously, “sorry about…the bad first impression.”

“Sometimes you get into shit and other people get covered, it’s fine… I should apologize to you. I don’t care much for you dad, but… it’s probably unfair to pretend like that's your responsibility.” 

“Yeah I’ll worry about it later.” 

The three of us did a quick sweep through the area. No sign of Calamity’s would-be assassins. With the safety of the woods ensured we started  the walk back to Hazel’s house. 

 

***

 

The fire crackled as we sat around the fire, faces illuminated.

“I’m surprised you were able to handle yourself so well,” Calamity said, rotating a marshmallow over the flame.

Hazel interjected, “You’d be surprised what you can do when you're panicked, actually!” 

“Yeah I… honestly just winged it. Lady Astovair was nice.” 

They both stared at me. “What?” asked Calamity. 

“Astovair?” I repeated 

Hazel let out a cackling laugh that popped with the fire. “Oh that’s actually pretty funny.” 

“What?!” 

“You spoke the high language of the Fae.” Hazel poked her finger in my direction “The Fae don’t hand that out to anyone, you know.” 

“I…” I contemplated that. I tried to think on how to… do it. I spoke the words. Ideas that were simple. The Stars were beautiful. The sound I made with my mouth was that of violin strings and vibrating strings with a warped reverberation. 

Calamity grinned and Hazel Cackled all the more. 

“Holy… that's amazing!” 

Calamity grinned, “oh that’s amazing! My mom would love to hear that, she’s a researcher for that stuff.” 

I could only continue to smile as we sat there upon a long log that had been carved out into a makeshift bench. 

Calamity and I kept exchanging glances and smiles at one another. Being around her… meeting her was the greatest thing to ever happen to me. 

Eventually though, Hazel excused herself, “Too much excitement, gonna go in and read under the lighting… behave yourselves!” she said waggling a finger and then chuckling. “I don’t actually care, just don’t slam the door when you come in to rest!” 

Minutes of silence pass between the two of us. I felt the urge to ask. “So… the other night?” I looked at Calamity while we had the moment to ourselves. 

“Which one?”

“The uh… after the party?”

“Ah… oh!” the realization hit her as she blushed, “Oh Yeah. That.” 

“Yeah,” I looked at the fire, “I’m… I did like it. I just want to know what it means.” 

“Well… I’m glad ‘cause I liked it, too.” She carried on, “You kiss good… for someone who hasn’t really kissed before.”

“How could you tell?” 

“Lucky guess?” there was a long silence “I… Roxie.“

I felt my face heat up as we looked into one another, wondering if she was searching for an answer like I was. Her eyes were bright, the fire only making the orange all the more strong. 

“I think… we’re going to be okay.” 

Something relaxed at hearing that. It wasn’t an answer, but it was… something. 

“Wanna go to my parents' place for Year’s End? There's… a really cool little festival, and a lot of cool lights!” 

I couldn’t think of a world where I’d say no. 

“Yeah. I think I’d really like that.” 

She laughed nervously, “Good. Have no idea what would have happened if you’d said no.” 

My body pushed into hers in a moment. I kissed her. I don't know where it came from, but I kissed her. 

I kissed her. And it felt just… perfect. 

We were going to be okay.