I should talk to father about it today. It's been a year now that I’ve read 'Advanced magic for the gifted'. After having tried out most of the spells in the book, some of which I couldn’t even manage to materialize, I came to the conclusion that I should have listened to Alaya. I needed a teacher badly.

I still remembered the grueling conversation with her. As I was practicing the control of my magic in my room as usual, controlling the glowing little ember as it flew around the room.

The door to my room had busted open and Alaya rushed inside like a tempest, scanning the room with alert eyes. I had tried my best to stop my magic in time, but it was too late. The glowing ember that was slowly falling to the ground right in front of my maid and the book in my lap had been dead giveaways.

She watched as the Ember had fallen to the ground, dissipating. I hadn’t used a lot of mana, just wanting to increase my control. As the little ember had stopped glowing, she turned her head at me, eyes squinting and the sides of her mouth turned downwards.

“I knew you were doing something suspicious” she crossed her arms, trying to control her voice from leaking the anger she must be feeling, “All the time you spent in your room. At first I just thought you were introverted, you didn’t bother accepting the invitations to tea parties from the other ladies after all,” her voice turned colder, disbelieving, “But the magic that bursts from your balcony every morning?” She took a deep breath, as I clenched my fists, “What, did you really think nobody would notice?” she snorted at my stupidity.

That’s not it, I was just tired of stunting my magical growth from hiding it all the time. It’s a gift that should be trained and used early, not left rotting. I thought about what to say, as the silence suffocated the room. “That’s not it!” I shouted, slightly angry at having been put on the spot. “I just didn’t want to hide it anymore,” I started quietly, “You know, I’ve been wanting to learn magic ever since I saw you clean the room with it,” I got louder as I gained confidence, “I was fascinated by it. Bending the world to your whims, just like that. All the power you could ever want in front of your fingertips, but I was not allowed to reach for it!” I shouted my indignance and fury of my early years.

Alaya walked towards me, her face doing a 180. Sitting down next to me and taking my hand, “It’s dangerous Amber, you should know.” She explained softly. I didn't meet her eyes as I looked to my lap. It might be for other children, but not so much for me. I was cautious, planning for days before I cast my first spell. “I’m worried for you Amber, I was the personal maid of your mother, and now I’m yours,” she rubbed my back with her free hand, “I just want you to stay safe, watch you blossom into a beautiful flower, just like your mother was.”

Thats not fair, I thought as I felt my eyes glistening. My throat hurt as she started speaking about my mother. I may not have had spoken to her all that much, but she had birthed me, given me her love, died for me. For that I would love her, always.

I waited, until I could trust my voice to come out right, “I know Alaya, but I don’t want to stop,” I looked at her pleadingly, “I love magic. Reading about it, thinking about it, casting it,” I revealed to her, I got louder as I thought about my love for magic “It’s my calling Alaya and I won’t ever stop learning about it, Not for the world. It makes me feel alive.” I ended, my voice resounding with passion.

She sighed, “I understand that Amber, I really do,” she reassured me, “every child probably had dreams of learning magic and becoming a Magic Saint at one point,” she smiled sadly, reminiscing, “I know I did. Back in those dark times I had to hold on to something, anything.” Her focus turned back to me, “How about this,” she started, “since you’ve apparently been casting magic for some time now, judging by your demonstration,” she gave me a dirty look, “I won’t tell you to stop pursuing it, seeing as you haven’t blown yourself up yet.” She ended, glaring at me severly. “But! You will have to tell the lord. No more secrets!” she ordered me in a tone that brooked no arguments.

I balked at that, my face scrunching in reproach at the idea of outing my secret to my father. Contemplating on the situation, I knew I had no choice, If I don’t tell him,  Alaya will probably do it. “Fine, if he must know, then I will tell him.” I crossed my arms and said with annoyance in my tone.

“It’s not all as bad as you make it out to be Amber,” she asserted gently, “Think about it as an opportunity, to showcase your skill to your father. From little I’ve seen, you have decent control over your element,” She smiled mischievously at me, “Who knows, perhaps you might even ask for a teacher?” she wiggled her eyebrows funnily “Fortune favors the bold after all.”

Smiling at her stupid expression, “alright, alright, I get it.” I rolled my eyes. “I’ll tell him about it, but you can’t rush me! I need to prepare myself for the conversation.” I included into the deal.

“Okay, no rush,” she smiled disarmingly, holding her hands up “But until you have a teacher, do me a favor and don’t try to learn any new spells over your weight class okay?” she requested softly. Before I could answer, she clapped her hands together and said in an upbeat tone, “now come on, show me some of that magic you’ve learned.”

As I inspected myself in the full length mirror, I felt ready. I needed to make a good impression, so I pulled out all the stops. I wore a stunning dress in shades of royal blue with silver highlights that brought out the color of my grey eyes I got from father.

The dress was made of the finest silken fabric, soft to the touch and draped elegantly over my body. The bodice was fitted while the skirt billowed outwards in soft, flowing waves. The sleeves were long and fitted, ending in delicate cuffs that matched the bodice.

Added to that, Alaya had also styled my hair beautifully after I told her that I would have the talk with father. I ran my fingers through my long, black locks, admiring the intricate hairdo that had been crafted for me. My hair was styled in loose, cascading waves that fell over my shoulders, framing my face beautifully.

I was dressed up for a reason, to make a good impression and not look sluggish. I wanted to look confident and in control. If there was one thing I learned in my past life, it was that looking good and prepared made a big difference in meetings. This feels like a job interview all over again. I took one final look in the mirror, satisfied with what I saw. I am ready.

As I walked the halls toward my father's study, I contemplated all the things I would tell him and how I would tell him. I needed to justify my learning magic early. Thankfully, Alaya said that she would vouch for me if it came to it. I smiled as I thought back to her reaction to my magic.

Alaya was baffled after seeing my Lightning Discharge, the spell I had first learned. It was one of my favorite spells, and I had spent a lot of time perfecting it. She kept calling me a genius and said that I would be a magic saint in no time. Apparently, she had never seen someone with such raw talent in magic, especially at my age.

She urged me to show my father the spell. "Trust me, If there is one thing I’ve learned ever since I started working in this mansion, it’s that the lord cares about the family name to an extreme level," she lectured me. "if he sees your magical aptitude, he will be more than happy to throw all the resources he can at you." I could believe her claim, with what I had seen of father.

As I came up to the grand black doors, ornately lined with gold and silver, I tried to calm myself. I took a deep breath and smoothed out the folds of my royal blue dress, making sure I looked presentable. I went over the arguments in my head once more and raised my hand to knock on the door. My knuckles tapped thrice against the wood with a soft echo. "It’s Amber father, I was wondering if you had time to talk." There was a moment of silence, and then I heard my father's voice, calling for me to come in. I took a deep breath and turned the handle, pushing the door open.