Chapter 198 – Dragon Fam
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(Ikarus) “Hmm… how do I explain this in a way that doesn’t make mother stress the heck out? I wonder… can I leave out the part about dying?”

(Petra) “Heh, it’s probably for the best to tell her Ikarus, without leaving it out. You’d want to know if you were in her shoes… or paws”

(Mute) <…!>

(Zeki) “Erk, why does it even matter that much? Orangey died but had a second chance, the exact same thing happened with brother”

(Ariza) “Uh, Zeki… you can just remain quiet and not say anything for a change. It’ll do everyone a world of good”

(Asmodeus) “Heh, you tell him blue one.”

“Both of you can bite me”

Having spent the night in cuddles and getting everyone up in the early hours of the morning to teleport away, we’ve just arrived at casa dragon cave so it’s time to revisit the parents.

Ah, can’t forget the fact Aesa is with us but she’s been pretty quiet since finding out she’s forced to now live outside. I’m not really sure what to do or say to ease any troubles she has, but it may not be needed. Point being, she must be pretty flexible since she’s had to deal with me for so long, she’ll power through this and experience life somehow. Who knows, maybe we’ll return to the settlement and even find someone for her…

[<Ikarus’s sense of humour may cause Aesa to kick her in a minute. As if Aesa could ever cheat on OUR wife>]

‘Calm down Aesa, the point is taken…’

“…Eh, best just get this done with… do you lot mind waiting out the front for a bit? Except Petra, it’ll be much easier this way”

Everyone gives me a quick nod, excluding Zeki who just shakes his head. Knowing him, he was probably looking forward to seeing my mother’s jugs, freaking large boob obsessed pervert… I’m going to be extra mean to him now considering everything that’s happened. His spear got me killed so anything is fair game.

Anyways, finally plucking up the courage to deal with this situation best I can, I enter the cave fully appearing around the side, and find all the dragon fam are sleeping peacefully, even Minos is in for a change. I know he loves to go out and hunt most of the day but arriving this early, must’ve caught him before he goes out.

‘Minos just casually getting bigger every time I see him… status’

[Name: Dermakvar  |  Species: Dragon  |  Level: 521]

[Health    30,250/30,250]

[Stamina 50,000/50,000]

[Magicka 50,000/50,000]

---

[Name: Minos   |   Species: Dragon   |   Level: 85]

[Health    6,750/6,750]

[Stamina 8,000/8,000]

[Magicka 6,500/6,500]

---

[Name: Kellearzar   |   Species: Dragon   |   Level: 1,000]

[Health 100,000/100,000]

[Stamina 75,000/75,000]

[Magicka 75,000/75,000]

‘Father is still the same since last check and Minos has gained eleven more, I think’

Considering it’s supposed to take decades for a dragon to fully grow and he’s already getting close to the hundreds, I think it’s safe to say it won’t take him that long. Heck, Minos is only supposed to be around three and a half, guess we’re just built different in this family… Thinking about it, it’ll be my birthday in a month and a bit. Wonder if we’ll be able to destroy Zeus within that time? Doubt it though.

<Yawwnnnn… Sister Ikarus!>

While I’m doing my distracted Ikarus routine locked in hands alongside Petra, Minos realizes we’re here, rushing over to us intending to rub his face against us as a greeting. Unfortunately, we don’t realize this quickly enough that he’s been drooling in his sleep…

Normally, this would be cute as hell, like how Mute does this animalistic thing, but getting covered in dragon spit is never something to be desired. Takes me way back to one of the first memories I have of this phoenix body, that being the time I couldn’t eat for myself and had to go full on baby bird with my parents… eww.

‘You know, if only Minos was a few hundred years older, him and Mute would be perfect together’

Putting that thought aside for, at least a few more decades because I’d rather not have the dragon FBI storming in through the cave, you can already tell there’s an awkward feeling stirring around as my parents wake up from the slight commotion.

Sure, I’ve always known my parents like to do the dirty deed, it’s obvious it must run in the family, but I’ve never seen it right in front of me, so colourful and vivid like that.

Father eventually breaks the awkwardness, almost looking like he’s guilty of something. If this ends up being another cheating fiasco and that dragon in human form wasn’t actually mother, I’m going to start beating him like mother does. Those swinging pounds of flesh of hers in human form are pretty uncanny though.

<Before we say or do anything else little one… I apologize you had to witness that yesterday. If we’d have known you were visiting, we’d have made sure to wear clothes at least>

‘Just clothes!? They really need to carve this cave out further and put in a private bedroom or something’

<Yes Ikarus, we’re sorry about that… how are you anyways?>

“I’m perfectly fine, not mentally scarred for life at all! Seeing your parents humping is sooo normal… it’s fineee…”

Obviously, my sarcasm is detected all around but honestly, I can’t even understand why they’re apologizing. From their perspective, I just teleported in and invaded their privacy, they don’t even know I died yet. If that were the case, I’d be completely in the wrong but damn, this is going to take a night of drinking to get over.

“…Eh, being serious a second. I’ve seen you fly off and hump before so it’s not like it’s anything new”

<That’s not what I was apologizing about little one. When parents love each other very much and have spent forever together, sometimes they do things a little unorthodox. Point being, those metal shackles you may have seen were a result of this>

‘What the fuck!?! I didn’t even see my parents in anything like that, this is only getting worse!’

The only reason why I can imagine father needing to say something like that is because maybe he thought I don’t understand the concept of bondage? Wait, mother was on top during that so was father the one wearing th-, I need a memory wipe now! All my organs need to just simultaneously shut down and die!

While I’m having an existential crisis about knowing what the hell my parents get up to, Petra can’t help but start to chuckle, knowing full well she’s only going to make this worse.

“Heh, looks like you might take after your father a little Ikarus”

Thankfully, both parents don’t seem to understand Petra’s little quip that causes me immense embarrassment. There’s such a tiny line between love and hate at times, it’s unreal!

“Pretty ironic considering what Aesa’s still got you wearing Petra… anyways, have you two not noticed anything new about me yet? Anything on my head for example?”

It’s obvious by all around that I’ve got two freaking horns protruding from my skull, yet no one seems to have any reaction.

<I wanted to ask about that but was worried if sister didn’t want to say! Can I use them to scratch myself with?>

‘He’s so unbelievably adorable at times’

“No Minos, you can’t… seriously though, you two going to say anything? I mean, it’s kinda related to the reason why I visited, just so happened to die as well, hence why I showed up so abruptly”

Judging by their reactions, I don’t think both parents know what to say about my death comment. Sure, I probably could’ve worded it better but oh well, makes more sense to just get it out there, nice and easily.

<Joking about dying isn’t funny little one>

<Yeah Ikarus, your father especially is speaking of a place too close to home. It’s slightly in poor taste>

‘They seriously don’t believe me!?! What kind of bullshit plot twist is this?’

“You two don’t believe me, do you? I literally ended up with demon lord’s Lucifer’s sword in my gut and I rose from a pile of ashes! You saw the nest and know the legends, that’s where I revived!”

Again, both of them continue to look unimpressed and I quickly realize they’ve already cleaned up the mess of ashes I brought with me when reviving. I actually can’t believe they don’t believe me!

<Well little one, we’re believe you if you insist, but death is supposed a one-way trip to the Underworld. This would be the first we’re ever heard of any creature, or being ever achieving something like that>

<Agree with your father Ikarus, it’s just a little hard to believe honestly, even with the rumours of how phoenixes work. As for the horns, we understand what causes them if that’s what you wanted to know?>

You know, despite the fact both my parents seem to think I’m lying, it’s kinda cool I’ve experienced something even thousand plus year old dragons haven’t. We’ll just now have to hope we don’t experience anything like that again because I’m back to no second lives for the next five hundred years or so.

I’m still extremely confused on why my parents seems extremely disinterested in the horns. Like for example, where’s the stereotypical father routine disapproving his daughter for doing something stupid like getting a tattoo, piercings or turning yourself into a demon lord? My parents are so mellow at times! Petra seems to have the answer though. Why would I need to know what causes them though? Obviously, that weird summoned being that possessed me did!

“Heh, they’ve lived forever and seen all kinds of things Ikarus. They probably see this like you’re going through a stage or something similar?”

<The dark one is correct little one. Although the other majin lords are extremely annoying, if you want to be one for a while, then we’re not going to stop you>

<Although, we’d prefer you not selling your soul to beings even we can’t fully comprehend Ikarus, it’s not our place to say yes or no. It’s your life to live and you grew up way too quickly for us to do or say anything about it>

Despite mother sounding somewhat proud, I can’t help but feel like I should’ve stayed in the cave for longer now. My phoenix childhood only lasted a year and a half and knowing my parents, I could’ve stayed here forever if I wanted. I wouldn’t have found Petra so soon but knowing her, she’d have gotten restless and eventually came around to visiting. Would my parents have killed her from trespassing in their territory though? Eh, there’s no point even thinking about a butterfly effect like that, the entire empire business could’ve been avoided if I hadn’t wanted to go out exploring beyond our boundaries as well.

<Little one… who’s visiting with you today? Excluding the dark one, the aura out there feels familiar>

“Ah, we’ve got Aesa, the phoenixes, Mute, and the demon lord Asmodeus. The horns are basically down to him”

Oddly enough, father seems to be unsure of something, like a sense of déjà vu you may get when hearing a name. He doesn’t follow it up though.

“I know I woke you up pretty early today, but you two really aren’t up for conversation, ain’t cha?”

“Cu?”

I am right though, feel like I’m steering this conversation forward while those two just want to go back to bed at times. I can come visit another time if it’s easier for them, I can teleport basically whenever I want now.

<Normally Ikarus, you don’t like sharing details of your life so we try not to ask much anymore>

“This is a little different though mother. I mean, I’m technically not even a phoenix anymore. All this prep to enter the heavens really is annoying”

Finally, a slight reaction only coming from father though. At times, I swear I become an attention seeking child around my dragon fam. Maybe my past of not having actual parents has made me like this a little? Eh, no point bringing up that crap again… urgh, freaking Brooklyn.

<Hang on one second little one. Did you just say plan on entering the heavens? Hmm… at least that explains the majin thing now. Why would you want to go up there?>

“Oh, it’s no big deal father, we’re just going up there to destroy Zeus. No biggy, we’re just planning on destroying the guy who is God of all Gods after all”

Like the heavens align, I’ve finally got the shocked reaction I was looking for from both of them. Sure, I have told them the odd tale of what I’ve been up to, but never the specifics like this. This is exactly what I was looking for.

<Can you promise us something Ikarus? Before you leave, you make sure to wait so we can say goodbye in person?>

<Just goodbyes dear? Are you sure that’s a smart decision?>

<We’ll discuss this alone in a little while Dermak, this isn’t the time or place for it>

<There’s nothing to discuss dear, letting little one go up there alone is stupidly dangerous, you know this!>

Pretty quickly and decisively, the conversation from the parents turns into an argument...

<We have company Dermakvar… we’ll talk more later>

<No dear, little one is on a suicide mission and we both know this. How can you of all people be so reckless?>

<Dermakvar, not now! When I say later, I mean later!>

<Hmph>

Mother sternly tells father off making everything go from zero to a hundred real quick. Everyone knows she’s always had the pants in this relationship, but seeing her like this is really unsettling. She’s probably got her reasons though, it can’t be that much of a suicide mission, right?

“Oh, just one last thing before we depart mother. Does the name Lucifer ring a bell? Do you have any history with a demon lord by that name?”

Despite now wanting to leave and get out of this tense atmosphere, I seriously can’t help myself but ask this. It doesn’t look like she knows anything about this though, it probably was just someone he loved got killed throughout her devastation. Just dragon destroying entire landmass sorta things, pay it no mind.

<No Ikarus, why?>

“Just met someone who you happened to piss off, maybe to do with the continent in the north? So… we erm… we’re going to leave now. I promise I’ll wait for goodbyes mother so please, make sure you come visit the town sooner rather than later”

“Heh, bye little guy as well. You’re getting bigger everyday”

<Cu! Bye sister Ikarus and auntie Petra!>

Giving a quick nod, a goodbye to Minos and getting the hell out of that tense cave as quick as possible, I do find what happened pretty strange though. Normally, it’s mother who’s overly protective of me and this time around, the roles have reversed? It’s unsettling.

It’s best to leave because what are you supposed to do or say when your parents are having a fight like that? Is this similar to how it feels when a kid goes through a divorce? It’s pretty weird but probably not that comparable though.

“Now that’s over Petra… it’s now time to turn you into my own personal Goddess!”

“Heh, own personal Goddess Ikarus? Am I your property now?”

“Yes in fact, that marriage makes me own your arse so you better just accept it!”

Out of context Ikarus here, slavery is always wrong but… is a marriage actually that different? It’s just a shared slavery where it ends up equal because both of you are servants to the other! I think I’ve ruined the joke now…

“Heh fair enough Ikarus. Beforehand, can we make a little detour to the empire? We don’t have to stay but it may be good for Zeki and Ariza”

“Uh, why’s that Petra?”

“Erk, yeah, why the fuck are we splitting up? I want to go drin-, I mean help sis out with the God crap”

Heh, it’s obvious Zeki’s reasoning for coming to the dwarven kingdom doesn’t involve Petra at all. I can understand her reasoning though, it sounds like Esmerelda is blood related to them so a little time getting to know the family can’t be too bad of an idea. Eh, maybe just make Zeki someone else’s problem for a change.

“You two actually have some family out there so don’t you want to know a little more about her? Besides, I assume our meeting with Denver and Athena will be uninspiring, no?”

(Asmodeus) “Heh, don’t look at me dark one, I don’t know everything”

Zeki and Ariza eventually reluctantly agree to the idea meaning while they’re off discussing family stuff, we’ve got a meeting with the kid God Hephaestus and Athena in order to sort out Petra’s level. Presumably, Asmodeus is coming along with us so that just leaves one other person, or creature.

(Ikarus) “What about you Mute? You coming with us to the empire or to the kingdom?”

<…!>

Mute points to the dragon cave making it seem like she wants to hang around her own species for a while. Can’t say I blame her, sometimes it’s nice to just be around phoenixes for a while, only three of the four phoenixes anyhow… damn it. Just realized I don’t count anymore; I can’t relate because demon lords suck!

(Ikarus) “Fair enough then Mute, we’ll part now. Although, I’d give them a minute, or an hour before going in. It seems a little tense in there”

They’ll probably make up pretty quickly from this slight disagreement. If my parents can get through father’s indiscretions, then they can resolve anything. Who knows, they’ll probably make up by bringing out the whips and chains next, maybe Mute should wait even longer, get Minos out asap as well…

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