Happy Christmas to those who celebrate it tomorrow,
I really hoped to get this episode out as a Christmas present so I hope you enjoy! 
Please be sure to comment to let me know what you think and share if you think your friends might enjoy this :)

I had planned to get this up sooner but I had a bit of a CP flare up over the last few weeks but it's here now! 

{Trigger warnings}
Eating disorder/Bulimic thoughts and tendencies
(Due to the last episode the MC worried she would be raped, she wasn't but her fears are discussed)

G R E E K ' S  B E A R I N G  G I F T S

You would think finding out you have a brother would put things into perspective but as I sat at my desk, emailing Sarah Jane about this newfound revelation, I realised I had no desire to meet him. James Hay or Sturgeon or whatever his name was probably had no clue about me and I wanted to keep it that way. I barely had enough time to deal with the family I had never mind bring a new one into the fold, it would just be yet another person I’d have to lie to.

            Of course I’d told them team what had happened when they came into the Hub that evening and swore the entire family had been retconned and the files erased. Tosh had no idea how Wyatt had access to half the files he found but made sure to update it in the system and set any alerts for his computer at work, in case he got the inkling to go snooping again. Jack and Owen told me I’d done the right thing, since it was the only option left and I agreed with them, although it still didn’t make me feel any better about what I’d done.

                        I’d drugged Chris’ family…I still couldn’t forget the way he looked at me, the look of utter betrayal clear in his eyes. I know he didn’t remember it but I did, I remembered the fight, I remembered the screaming and I know what would of happened even if he didn’t.  

            How many lies was I comfortable with telling? How many more could I spin before I broke?

            All I wanted to do when I got home from the camping trip was go to bed, maybe order some Korean sesame chicken with chips and prawn crackers, then kick back and watch some Top Gear but no, I had a family of six including Chris talking at me constantly. I felt like I needed a break from them never mind work. It wasn’t like I didn’t enjoy their company but they were used to being a big family, asking a million questions and being about each other’s business. At one point during dinner it was like someone had turned the exposure up to a hundred and a pair of amps were sitting right beside me, blasting their conversations.

            We’d planned out the guest list so far in one evening and even started a seating chart but then they started talking about colour scheme and they lost me. At some point whilst they were chatting about flower options and who would be best man I’d put in one earphone, playing nothing but the sounds of a thunderstorm as I scrolled through different invitation ideas. I was going to ask Toshiko to be my Maid of Honour, since I knew she’d be fabulous and she was my best friend. I thought about asking if Maria and Luke wanted to come to the wedding, since it might bulk out my side a little bit, maybe even Maria’s dad Alan would want to come. He’d just gotten divorced though, would inviting him to a wedding be a little insensitive? I’ll put that in an email to Sarah Jane and see what she thinks.

            The rest of the night went by okay, I just made sure to stay in whatever room had the least amount of people in it, mostly spending my time working on my laptop in the kitchen. I promised I was okay and just taking time to look at the different spreadsheets and mood boards Melinda had created. She’d also sent me different boutiques that were nearby to take a look at, which the next day we did, since apparently I wasn’t allowed a slow quiet morning.

            I’d tried on quite a few dresses but none of them seemed like the one, especially when Melinda was adamant to put me into slim fitting body con dresses. We’d done my makeup and hair before we left which means I was up at seven to do a full face, which also meant I had to get up at six to cover all the bruises on my body from the past. I was fucking exhausted by the afternoon, then just when I was going to go for a nap, Melinda informed me she’d made an appointment at the florists.

            She was a great wedding planner don’t get me wrong, she really was on top of it all but it was just the worst weekend to do it. I’d barely got thirty minutes of sleep before Piper was knocking on my door, telling me dinner was ready.

            That’s why today, two days before the Halliwell family were due to go home, I was practically jumping up and down that it was Monday and I had to go to work. I made sure to leave the house at four this morning, so no one could ask any questions. I left a note on my bed for Chris and headed into town in a taxi. Once I got in I ran up to the conference room, writing yet another note to stick on the door, explaining the situation for what the team came in. I grabbed for the boxes under the tables and took out the small folded mattress, duvet and pillows before crashing out. I don’t think I’d ever been so excited to sleep alone.

            I’d slept for about six hours before Ianto woke me up with breakfast – again, with the food – I was hardly going to starve. After I’d been fed and I filled the girls and Ianto in on all the wedding drama, some words of encouragement and confusion were thrown about, like;

            ‘But you hate body con dresses.’ Tosh had said.

            ‘I thought your favourite flower was a lily, why are they wanting to get begonia’s?’ Ianto had asked.

            ‘Do you want a hug?’ Gwen had asked.

            ‘I’ll make the hot chocolate and go put in an order for dinner tonight.’ Ianto had declared, already popping off to his station.

            The girls had sat me down after that in the conference room, asking how I was feeling about what happened at the campsite, especially since my jeans had been ripped off. It was nice to talk about since I knew they understood and wouldn’t get overly angry, which most of the men in my life would of. I didn’t remember much of the campsite, since I wasn’t conscious for a lot of it but what I did, I pondered over with them, filling in the blanks of what I’d missed.

            Tosh had said something interesting though, something that Ianto had said.

            “Who protects us?”

            And I wouldn’t lie, he had a point.

            We were this small organisation shrouded in mystery and class but there was no one higher to protect us, Tosh however concluded that we protect each other.

            A few minutes later Ianto joined us in the conference room with an abundance of hot chocolate, where we sat and chatted about everyone else’s life. Tosh was planning to go and visit her family in the next few days because it was her aunts birthday, then Gwen was thinking of going to dinner with Rhys but I told her to avoid the Cartier since it was extortionate. Then Ianto said that he had a lot of tidying at his flat to do, that it’s become a bit of a tip and needed to get it sorted as soon as possible because it was starting to annoy him. The girls and I had invited him to our movie night at Gwen’s place at the weekend, which he’d happily agreed to since it would be nice to get out of the Hub and the mess of his own apartment.

            ‘Doesn’t this look cosy?’ Jack had said, flinging the door open to the conference room. ‘Am I paying you to sit around and talk about each other’s feelings?’

            ‘No,’ I’d started. ‘But-’

            ‘Ianto I need to get the Prime Minister on the line and you know how his secretary likes to pretend he’s not there.’

            ‘Right, I’ll see to it.’

            ‘Tosh I need the specs on today’s rift activity, we think there might have been a spike early this morning.’

            ‘Okay.’

            ‘Gwen get on the phone to the police and speak with that man David, voice like Ben Afleck, I want to know what they know about the murders in the countryside.’

            ‘Right you are.’ Gwen had said, pushing herself up from the floor.

            ‘Erin go through Wyatt’s files, see what he found and if there’s anything on us erase it, Tosh can get you into his work computer.’          

            ‘Yes sir.’ I’d smiled, packing up the conference room and heading to my desk.

            I had all of Wyatt’s files saved on my computer and since the late hours of this morning, had been going through them categorically. The last folder left was one titled relationships, there wasn’t much in it, just a few ex boyfriends but there was one that stood out to me; Elizabeth Flynn or as I knew her, Lizzy. She was my first girlfriend and there was a hell of a lot on her. It detailed her life, how we’d met in high school and then when we broke up, after she decided to tour the world with her rock band. I was the one that ended things of course, I didn’t see how we could make it work and I was far too busy with uni and she was too busy with performing, our relationship was chaos and I knew it wouldn’t last.

            ‘You alright there, Swann?’ Owen asked, plopping down in a chair beside me. ‘Ever since the Eastenders worthy news you haven’t really moved from this desk.’

            ‘Yeah I’m just going through everything Wyatt had, it’s a lot.’

            ‘Who’s she?’ He asked, pointing to a picture of me and Lizzy.

            ‘That’s Elizabeth well Lizzy, we used to date.’

            ‘Oh now that’s not fair.’

            ‘What’s not?’

            ‘This bastard knows more about you than we do, you never said you had a girlfriend.’

            ‘Well I don’t really think about her too much anymore-’

            ‘Come on, tell me how you met.’

            ‘Haven’t you got a Weevil to dissect?’

            ‘Yeah but still, I’m on a break.’ He nudged my shoulder. ‘I wanna know.’

            ‘Fine, Lizzy and I met in high school and believe me it was all sneaking away from class and breaking the rules back then, she was a bad influence on me…’