As we drive, Jessica asks me a question, "Why did you put me in charge of her?"

I shrug, "She's your doll, and you seemed concerned for her well-being. She doesn't have any actual needs, and you might find her useful. She's not very bright, but I can load her up with any skills you think are good. So she can be a cook, or a maid, or a computer programmer, or a surgeon, or a rocket scientist, or an exotic dancer, or… well, whatever you want. All of them, if you'd like. Being able to move, she'll even be better at her pre-animation function. She's a constructed being. Her only desire is to follow orders."

Jessica shudders, "What kind of existence is that?"

The doll answers, "Mine, mistress."

"Call me Jessica."

"Yes Jessica."

"What would you have me do? She can happily follow orders.  That's what she is. Without orders, she'll just stand there. She already exists, there's not really any other option. Theoretically I could turn her off, but how is that different from killing her?"

"She's not going to like, tell people how I used her?"

"She didn't previously have a mind: Her memory starts today.  And she will do what you tell her, to within the limits of her abilities. Which I can expand if you'd like. But she is quite literally made to serve. If you don't want her I can take her back, maybe set her up in my Sanctum as a maid, and order a replacement doll for you."

"No! That's… she's literally made to serve?"

"Yeah. If anyone asks, you can tell them she's an experimental prototype, which is technically true, as I've never done that before, and if they challenge you on it, have them try to find her pulse. She doesn't have one, so that should be pretty convincing. In a real pinch, have them take her to a doctor for some X-rays or something."

"Just a complex AI program, kept disconnected from the internet for security…."

"Yes. Not truly a person." Pretty sure. That might change if I exceed my control limit, though. But I could have like eight of these running at my current level, so… hmm…harem… No! Bad Chris! I'm with Jessica! Hormones aside, the doll would… probably obey her last order if I lost control? And that would be to obey Jessica, so… should be fine.

"I'll keep her for now, then. Anyway, we're here…."

I look out the window and see a ten story apartment building, painted a dark green. I can see chips in the paint from here.

"Let me guess…"

"He's on the top floor, and the elevator is always out. Rent is cheap, and he doesn't have to worry about neighbors."

"That's how he stays in shape, huh?"

Jessica parks and pulls out her phone. "Part of it. Always gets leg day in."

She dials James, "Hey partner."

…

"We're in the parking lot. Figured your new key stopped working…"

…

"Yeah. Seems it can't be used by someone who uses magic."

…

"Yes."

…

"Yes."

…

"Still together."

…

"Regardless, Chris has a solution for getting your car back, and has already started on a replacement for the garage. Also the watch and eyeglass."

…

"Yes,but look at it this way: You can do magic now!"

…

"A what?"

…

"And it just appeared overnight?"

…

"Have you looked through it?"

…

"Sounds more straightforward than how I picked up my spells."

…

"Do you want your car back or not?"

…

"See you soon." She hangs up.

"So he received a spellbook?"

"Yes. And he said he's going to come down 'the fun way'."

"I wonder if he got Featherfall…."

"What’s…"

Before Jessica can finish her question, she sees someone in a cheap suit take a running leap off the roof of the building.

My driver screams, "James!" as he falls. I step out of the car to cast in case I am wrong, but as expected, he shouts out a spell just before he hits the ground, slowing his fall, and he lands safely, although on his face.  

He's laughing as I walk over to help him up.

"Oh man, that is SO fun. Thank you." He grabs my hand, and I help him up.

Jessica rushes over and punches James in the gut, "You moron! You scared me! What if you died! What if someone catches you on video?"

"Oh relax, would you? I watched Chris fix death. And my book spells out exactly what my spells do. I even tested it earlier with a ten foot jump. And the plan is to give everyone magic eventually, right? Folks will find out sooner or later anyway. May as well be me."

"Oh, so you're a wizard then?" Ugh. My voice just cannot sound serious.

"Nah. Arcanist. I prepare spells from a book like a wizard, but I can mix and match which ones I cast on the fly like a Sorcerer. And some of the exploits are sweet."

… "So you're familiar with the game already?"

"Used to play it as a kid in high school. Class I would have picked anyway, it's the best of both classes. So that's your power, then?  You make the game real?"

"Yes… but I have a lot of house rules on my build, and am pushing the optimization way past what I would at a gaming table. And we should probably have this conversation in private for now…."

"Ah, right…"

We head into the apartment building - and yes, the elevator is out - so we climb the ten flights of stairs to the top, and James lets us into his immaculate - if small - apartment.

"I don't have any adjacent neighbors, and that includes the floor beneath us, so this should be fine."

"So… I guess we need to party up and go find some bad guys for XP?" James seems eager.

… "It's legal for you to patrol, isn't it?"

"As a cop? Yes, absolutely. So you hide us and we go find a bunch of bad guys to arrest, defeating them, rinse and repeat until we all level up a few times. Sound like a plan?"

"It does, yes. Ah… quick question, though: What class do you think would best suit Jessica?"

"Summoner. She still remembers her childhood imaginary friend, and always wanted her to be real. And if she gets the 'chained' version, it's even a decent tier two class."

"OK, yeah, you've got your geek creds."

"What’s a summoner, exactly?"

James pipes up first, "A Charismatic spontaneous caster that keeps a design-your-own immortal pet that she can summon to fight for her, in addition to her spells. Banned in organized play because it made the melee folks cry."

"... so I can have Lady Kitten?"

"Seems so," I interject, "You should know how to summon her readily enough. Takes a minute of concentration."

She pauses and thinks for a minute, and we watch a colorful cat about the same size as Jessica herself slowly form from thin air.  When the summoning finishes, there's a strange symbol on her forehead and a matching one on Jessica's.

"Ah, right, forgot about that…"

Jessica is clearly oblivious, "Forgot about what partner?"

"Check a mirror," I'm trying not ro laugh.

Jessica pulls out her phone and takes a selfie, "Oh, I've got my own Sailor Senpai Symbol. That's… fun, but going to be awkward at work. Chris, can you magic that away?"

James shakes his head, "Not with magic, no. You'll need a hat or something. Or unsummon her."

Jessica pouts, so I add, "I can get you a hat, at least. Any particular style?"

"Maybe one of those Fedoras like the archeologist in those movies?"

I cast Clothier's Closet in James's hallway, and as that hat is well within range of the accessories for an Adventurer's outfit, create that for her, and hand it over. She puts it on just the hat from the outfit, and it doesn’t look too bad.

Of course, Lady Kitten still has the symbol. And is basically an oddly colored mountain lion.

I get down on my haunches and address the Eidolon, "Lady Kitten, how do you feel about a police dog uniform with a hat? It might let you accompany Jessica in more places."

Jessica raises one eyebrow in curiosity, which becomes both in amazement when Lady Kitten answers, "You're going to need to make me look like a dog, aren't you?"

"Most probably. The other alternatives that come to mind are that she doesn't keep you summoned most of the time or that I make you invisible, in which case you'll need to remember nobody can see you, dodge around doors, and try not to get underfoot."

"Fine, fine. I'll deal with people thinking I'm some stupid mutt."

I invoke another casting of Clothier's Closet to make a police dog "uniform" with a hat for Lady Kitten, which Jessica helps her into. After she's wearing it, I also drop a Disguise Other on her to make her look like a police dog, specifically a Great Dane.

"Cuddle her enough and you'll get through the illusion," I advise Jessica, "so do keep most folks clear."

"You think you can endure police dog training?" Jessica asks her Eidolon, "It'll be better to get you registered."

"Like any stupid dog can keep up with me," the cat snarks.

"I'm more concerned you'll lose your patience with the dogs and eat them."

"I shall endure, Jessica."

"Well, if we are going to patrol, I should probably lay down some buffs… any objections?" I look around the room.

"What’s a buff?" Ah yes, Jessica doesn't play.

"A spell that makes you better at what you do in some way. Stronger, faster, better able to resist blows, or so on," James chimes in, "and they're most welcome."

I go around the room and tag everyone with all six of the stat boosting spells for basic numbers, plus Celestial Healing (in case of injury, they'll recover quickly), Haste (so they move faster, hit more accurately, and can dodge a bit better), Fly (because moving in three dimensions rocks), Air Bubble (not that I expect anyone to go underwater, but you never know), Delay Poison (effective immunity when the duration never expires), Delay Disease (likewise), Message (whispered communication at a distance is handy), and Protection From Arrows (because bullets are ranged attacks, and nobody uses magic bullets… yet… so this will stop anything short of a critical hit, and dampen those).  I'd add invisibility, but See Invisibility is a personal spell, and that adds some complications.

And yes, I include Fleeting Spell on everything. I don't really expect anyone to turn on me, but being in fast time 24/7 might be a problem, washing your hair might get interesting when there's a bubble of air around your head, and someone might want to enjoy a few beers. Might also be unexpected issues with exercise routines.

That's what I tell myself, anyway.

And thus warded, we head out to find fodder - after getting James's car out.