Okay. This was a short story of about 30k words I added for filler. As you can see, it has expanded WAY beyond that. I think I'm a little short of 50k. I didn't like the choppy storyline. Alas, there are about three extra plot lines I should have added. It's not my best, but hey, it only took about two weeks to finish it up to a presentable ending.
Will I go back and fix it? It's fan fiction. Unlikely.
Will I write more? I like the storyline and I got a bunch of ideas going forward. It's a bit of a Hammer Blow story. I don't think I earned the end, but hey, I got two other novels to finish up and this was just filler. So, something has to give. However, if people wanna see more of Jake, I have this idea for how they'll help him find the will to live.
I mean, the Justice League was thinking of a program to deal with kids with superpowers anyways...
Like all my afterwords, I like to answer Reader questions, so, I'll give it a week. If you have any comments, questions, suggestions, or whatnot, post them in the comments. If you plan on saying, "It was great! or It sucked! I want to know WHY. I don't mind opinions of any sort, just be detailed so I can learn.
Anyways, Look back in a week or two for the final Afterword.
Been fun!
-TEG
I would love to have more of this story
Felt a little too condensed at times and jumped around a bit. But it has all the bones of a good story. Liked the reactions to how his actions showing how broken he is, as a story thread it worked. But it did feel like it needed a bit more of a build up. Rather than immediately seeing how broken he is build it up with a bit more of a gradient.
Yeah, if I ever get a book deal with DC comics (HA!), I might do a full rewrite on this. Or when I catch up my other series. Like I said, When I finally get IWS and FTS caught up, it'll be readers choice when one I continue
@TheEldritchGod You have talent so there is no way DC or Marvel will hire you.
@ilosttoapathy - I wish I could disagree with you. But you know something? If ISOM/rippaverse was hiring writers, I'd file the serial numbers off this bad boy so fast YOU would get hit with metal filings through the internet. HELL. I'd work for GODDAMN FREE, just to twist the screws on Marvel/DC.
The faster those two bloated rotting zombies pretending to be comic book companies DIE, the better.
@TheEldritchGod these days I much prefer the French comics and the old pulps where everyone else cribbed from
@TheEldritchGod Isn't Marvel already long dead? I am pretty sure you end up dead-dead with no chance of being raised if your soul is fed into The Mouse's all consuming maw. What people call Marvel these days is just the skin suit being danced around until the rot is far enough advanced that even the blind can see there is nothing inside.