abby_gay_ill

so sorry this one took so long to get out! i been sick

I shifted awkwardly in the stool, trying in vain to find a comfortable method of sitting. Even as an adult, I still couldn't quite master the art of staying still. I forced my eyes to the mirror I was sat in front of. Even now, it was hard to break the habit of avoiding my reflection. As always, I was awed to see a woman staring back at me. I don't think I'll ever get tired of that. Estrogen has been very kind to me. I can't help but smile at myself, and appreciate how cute my smile has become. My cheeks are so soft, so smooth. All of me is soft and smooth. I still have bags under my eyes so heavy they may as well be suitcases, but I've grown quite fond of them. I think they lend me a kind of world-weary, jaded look which has become so chic in recent times. There are still things I'm insecure about, of course. If I spend enough time looking I can find places that dissatisfy me, but all things considered, it's getting harder and harder to hate the person I see in the mirror. Sure, she isn't perfect, but who is?

In answer to my silent question, Maddie struts into the room, rolling her eyes. Gosh, she's so gorgeous. How did I ever end up with a girl like her?

"Why aren't you dressed?" She says, voice full of faux outrage. Then, her eyes flash with the realisation of what exactly me not being dressed entails, and she turns pink, a hand rushing upwards to cover her eyes. I dismount the stool, crossing our tiny bathroom in a single stride, and wrap my arms around her neck.

"Babe. It's okay for you to see me in my underwear." I leave unspoken how elated I am that just glimpsing me in a state of undress is enough to fluster her. I kiss her forehead, a show of forgiveness. "We've literally had sex before." Another forehead kiss, this one because I want to.

Maddie goes an even deeper shade of red, and puts her hands on my outstretched forearms. "I know..." A gentle sigh. "And I know it's just my brain being stupid, but I can't help feeling predatory."

"Well if you're a predator, then I gotta tell ya, this is an extremely inefficient method of hunting. We've been dating for what, four years now? If you haven't eaten me yet, you're probably not a very good predator." I lean down so my mouth is at her ear. "And even if you are a predator, I wouldn't mind being your prey."

She thumps a fist gently against my chest. "God. You are incorrigible." Her hands slowly, tentatively make their way around my waist. "What I mean is, like, I can't shake the feeling that it's wrong. That I'm not allowed to look at women like that. That I should feel bad for wanting to. It's hard to unlearn that stuff."

I nudge her face upwards with my chin, then plant a gentle kiss on her lips. Even now, so many years in, it's electrifying. "I know exactly what you mean." I kiss her again. "And if it's any consolation," I kiss her, "I'm going to keep telling you it's allowed," I kiss her, "Over and over," I kiss her, "Until you're thoroughly convinced." I kiss her once more, for good measure.

Maddie returns my kiss, tenderly placing a hand on my cheek. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Now go put some clothes on." Suddenly thrust out of her embrace, back into the bedroom, I struggle to keep myself upright.

"Wha- Bu- You said you were doing my make-up for today!"

"Yes, and make-up goes on after clothes, sweetie."

"You aren't wearing your costume yet!"

"No, but I can put the individual armour plates on closer to when we have to leave. You have to at least get the dress on over your head, otherwise you're going to smudge it."

Well, I guess there's no avoiding it. I open my wardrobe, and there it is. The dress. Grace's dress. That probably isn't super informative, seeing as how I'm Grace, but by Grace, here I mean my namesake. The character from the hottest game of five years ago. I take it off its hanger, brushing it with my hands to feel the material. A little synthetic, but it only has to look nice. It's been a little while since I've played, and longer still since I've looked at her model in detail, but I don't remember the skirt she wore being quite so short. A consequence, I suppose, of letting my girlfriend handle the details of my cosplay.

I struggle to get my neck through the opening, the sheer white fabric proving less pliable than expected. The neckline is high, thank goodness, so it covers the part of me I find most ungainly. I shimmy it down my body, running into some trouble getting it over my hips. Thank you very much for those, estrogen. I decide to put some more of the outfit on, just so I don't feel quite so exposed. I have to wrestle to get my feet in the neon pink knee-high boots she wears. The azure blue arm-warmers don't put up nearly as much resistance.

I waddle back into the bathroom. Maddie is beaming at me. She gets off the stool and beckons me to sit. "Alright, first things first, let's get your hair out of the way!" She takes a hair tie off from her wrist, and uses it to tie my hair back. As she does, she leans down to plant a kiss on my cheek.

Make-up, to me, is a kind of wizardry. I don't understand how it works, beyond that it does. I'm sure that given enough persistence, I could learn, but I don't really feel the need. Make-up is awesome, and it can do all kinds of wondrous things, but it just isn't for me. So while Maddie stood behind me, carefully applying foundation, blush, mascara, and all kinds of other reagents in an arcane ritual to increase my beauty, I paid little attention. I spent most of the time just staring into her eyes. Gosh, she's so pretty.

Maddie must have noticed my fugue state, as a shake of my shoulders snaps me out of it. "You doing okay?"

I blink my eyes a few times, in an attempt to regain some of my bearings. "Yeah, just a little-"

Whatever I was going to say gets cut off by seeing my newly-updated reflection. She's gorgeous. Incredible. A bombshell, if I might be so bold. And she's me. There was no disbelief, no surprise there. She was a beautiful woman, and she was me. It felt normal. If I was so inclined as to delve into the secret depths of make-up, it'd probably be normal.

"You like it?"

"You're a genuine sorcerer, you know that?"

Maddie laughs, and it's the most beautiful sound I've ever heard. "What's that supposed to mean?" I move to kiss her, but she dodges out of the way. "Nuh-uh! Don't want to smudge your lipstick!"

"Ugh, fine. It means you did good. Real good."

"Aw shucks. All I did was bring out the beauty you already had." She puts a finger under my chin, and brings my face up to hers, examining her work in closer detail. Our faces are so close, and we seem to become aware of this simultaneously. We commence a who-can-turn-pink-the-fastest contest, which I lose. I don't mind, seeing as my consolation is another mellifluous giggle from Maddie. "Now get out of here, or we're gonna get distracted and wind up late."

I fetch the wings, which Maddie made herself, cardboard and foam acting as an adequate substitute for aluminium and steel. I don them, a cross-shaped harness keeping them in place. I take my hair out of the tie Maddie put it in, and retie it into the high pony of the character, affixing the halo in place as I do. I pull a piece of hair out of the pony, draping it over my face, then spraying it into submission. My box-dyed hair isn't exactly the shade of white of the character, but it'll suffice.

My phone buzzes on the bed. I feel a pang of longing for pockets long-since discarded. It's May, confirming the time and place for us to meet up before we head into the con. My anticipation is mounting, and it isn't long before we're headed there. I feel a little weird, taking the bus in cosplay, but I'm with Maddie, so I don't mind. Besides, the six-inch platforms she's wearing make her stand out even more than I do. As we make our way off the bus, and head to our planned meet-spot outside the convention centre, I spot a pair of figures waiting for us. There's Bridget, dressed as a character from a magical girl anime that I'd never heard of, and next to her must be May. May, who insisted that her costume remain a surprise, but assured me I would love it. May, who knew that Maddie and I were cosplaying Rockette and Grace together. May, who'd managed to convince me she wasn't pulling any kind of stunt here, she just really wanted her costume to be a surprise.

I stormed over to where they were standing, Maddie chasing behind me as quickly as she could on what were basically stilts. May was clearly stifling a giggle. Bridget elected not to trouble herself with stifling, and broke into laughter. When Maddie caught up to us, May was barely maintaining her facade of calm. "W-well," she said, trying very hard to get through her prepared statement, "One of us is- is gonna have to change."

Bridget's laughter was renewed by the delivery of a punchline which must have had hours of work poured into it. Maddie and May joined in, making it a chorus. As much as I wished I could remain indignant, I had to admit it was funny how much work May had put into such a small joke. Still, I couldn't actually laugh, that would mean letting her win.

"Very funny, May. God, I cannot believe you. How long did it take you to make a cosplay that was literally identical to mine?"

"It isn't literally identical! You're taller than me! And you have, like... y'know..."

I shot her a quizzical look. "What do I have?"

May pointed her fingers together. "Y-you have, uh... y'know..." May trailed off, staring at the ground. Her face was just the slightest bit pink.

Bridget knelt down, placing herself directly in May's line of sight, interjecting. "May, I love you, but gosh are you hopeless. C'mon," she said, gesturing to us. "Let's get ourselves in line."

As we queued up, Bridget started ranting about some new mecha anime she was watching, and how extremely gay it was. May was hanging off her arm, clearly still flustered from whatever it was she was trying to tell me. I looked over to Maddie, standing next to me, and threaded my fingers in hers. She was taller than me for once, which was nice. How did I get so lucky, to be surrounded by such wonderful people? Maybe I have a guardian angel. Maybe I am a guardian angel. That doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Oh well. What matters is that things are good. I'm happy. Things aren't just good. They're wonderful.

abby_gay_ill

hey it's me abby here, the author. grace's story might be over now, but i'm gonna keep on writing! i might take a little bit of a break, but i have heaps of ideas that i wanna put into action! i have a very long term project that you probably won't see anything from for quite a while, a silly lil short story i can't see breaking 5 chapters, and like 3 more stories i really wanna write but are still very up in the air! thank you again so so much for reading! i really appreciate all your comments!