Grant Flincher was on his way home from the library when it happened. He was walking across the street with his headphones in his ears, trying to think up a new idea for a story to post on his favorite site Scribblehub.com.
"Hmmm... maybe I should try an isekai? I haven't tried to write one in a while, but it seems to be the most popular genre." Grant shoved his hands in his pockets, dreading the thought. He hated isekais, but he always liked seeing a big number of views on his stories. "God, but what can you do that hasn't been done before with an isekai? There's a thousand of them! And writing those boring stat blocks seems like such a chore..."
He didn't even know who the hell liked isekai. It was always boring and predictable, the definition of formulaic: someone would get hit by a truck, then wake up in front of some goddess, then be resurrected in a boilerplate Tolkien-inspired fantasy setting as either a more powerful version of themself, a little girl, some kinda stupid gimmicky monster, or any combination of those three things.
A notification from his phone drew his attention. He stopped in place in the middle of the street to check it - hey, someone had given his latest story a new review! He tapped over to read it.
Grant nearly pitched his phone at the pavement. He had spent two days on that first chapter, seven hours of which was just perfecting the first sentence! He had poured his heart and soul into those words!
Readers were idiots. Repulsive no-life dunces. Absolute braindead morons.
They didn't know what made a good story. They didn't want anything original. No, they wanted the same worthless pig slop regurgitated onto their screens, just with a new name and gimmick. Reincarnated as a Dungeon Core! Reincarnated as a Rabbit Girl! Reincarnated as a Blade of Fucking Grass! They'd read for five chapters, then drop it for the next piece of shit isekai with a flashy title.
Suddenly, a truck came barreling his way. Through some miracle, he managed to pull himself out of the way just in time, stumbling to the road and landing on his butt.
"Holy shit!" he patted himself down, happy to be in one piece.
In that moment, he truly valued his existence, like he never had before. Why apply self-worth to the reception of your little internet stories? And in any case, he had plenty of readers. One anonymous idiot's opinion was just that: nothing. Grinning, he closed his phone and forgot all about the review, prepared to walk back to his dorm with a new view on things.
Then, another much larger truck tore through, flattening him into a grisly pancake. The last thing Grant heard was his own head popping like a balloon under one of the sixteen wheeler's extra-strength grip tires.
When Grant woke up, he was floating in a black void.
"Oh, God." he looked down at himself. His body had been entirely repaired. "Am I dead?"
"It's Goddess, actually." a feminine voice rang out, reverberating nowhere and everywhere all at once. "Goddess Generia, but just Gigi for short. And yes, but we're about to fix that."
Grant's stomach dropped.
"Oh, no, no, no no no." He pushed through the void, trying to swim away - as if there was somewhere he could run. "No. No! No! Fuck no!"
"Prepare to be reborn, Grant." the goddess's cheery voice was unwavering. "The world of Generia needs a hero."
White light flooded his vision. He let out a final cry before dissipating.
"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKK!!!"
"Readers were idiots. Repulsive no-life dunces. Absolute braindead morons." I feel personally attacked. honestly one of the best laughs I've had in a while though. I can't wait for more.
*Some kinda stupid gimmicky monster that turns into a human/human-like in a few chapters anyways.
Honestly, that's one of the worst LitRPG/Isekai tropes. If your story is called "Reincarnated as a Cactus" then I want to read about a cactus, goddamn it!
@glenn-fletcher i look forward to future in which this Cactus story exists
@Valer Maybe it'll be my next story then!
Lol Isekai fan 69 must be a man of culture lol. So far so good, might be fun to read a RIP on the Isekai genre. Hope it's more than that I look forward to seeing what kind of story develops
I was initially planning to just make it a total joke, but I came up with a kinda interesting plot idea I think I could take somewhere. And yes isekai-fan-69-lul has amazing taste, doesn't he?
@glenn-fletcher Is "isekai-fan-69-lul" Our one true god real?
@NCKZMA oh pls let him be the final boss. Like rival protag living his best life shitting on the MC, or shitty Demon lord the MC has to slay... ohh man.
He was walking across the street with his headphones in his ears, trying to think up a new idea for a story to post on his favorite site Scribblehub.com.
Yes it be the scribble hub
A notification from his phone drew his attention. He stopped in place in the middle of the street to check it - hey, someone had given his latest story a new review! He tapped over to read it.
Very much me when I started writing fanfics hahahaha ha oh the pain
He had spent two days on that first chapter, seven hours of which was just perfecting the first sentence! He had poured his heart and soul into those words!
Yep one of the reasons I don't post unless I feel I'm done with the chapter.... Which didn't happen recently...... Crie....
Readers were idiots. Repulsive no-life dunces. Absolute braindead morons.
Now this just had me bawl out laughing
I remember someone left a bad review on my web novel because I hurt his feelings.
But man, I feel you on how you feel about the isekai genre trope these days. But these isekai manga sells like crazy, cus their target audience don't really care about new and cool plot. Thicc plot gets money.
Isekai to me is a lot like Taco Bell: the same few ingredients, just mixed around a little differently with maybe some kind of gimmick thrown in.
Also, it all turns into sh*t pretty fast.
My favorite comment on a new story I read,
"Put sword wielder as a tag, because I don't read any stories where the mc uses swords"
Like some people who comment are just crazy.
But I like isekai because it is easier to put yourself into the shoes of the mc. But some of the tropes are just insane. There are some extremely well written ones out there and usually it comes from actually taking the time to plan out and create a good world that the mc is going to end up in. There has to be PLOT and not the big boobed kind. And for the love of all that is good don't make it slice of life.
LOL, okay I ought to admit. This is better than a lot of new stories, and while I had just read the concept in another story literally 5 hours ago. This was just so much better executed, the satire was on point. Keep it up author-san.
I know how hard some things can be, seven-hours in the first sentence is a small price to achieve perfection. Keep it up!
Also, did someone say "Reincarnated As a Dungeon Core!" Pff! Preposterous! Who could write something like that? It doesn't even make sense, bet the author wrote it to become a loli or something. Probably gender-bender as well with fluffy ears and stuff. Seriously, originality these days is nonexistent!
Thank you so much, I know lampooning isekais/LitRPGs isn't a new concept, but I'm hoping I can put my own spin on it. And that's actually a total coincidence!
Isekai get alot of hate for being a bad genre, but its only that way because of the easy set up that attracts bad writers who don't want to deal with writing the beginning of a story.
Readers tend to like isekai novels even if the writers are bad because its freaking hard to screw it up when theres so few options to choose from (at first glance). Isekai also offers a quicker and more literal escape from the reader's reality.
Not defending all the crappy tropes and gimmicks that arose from it, they can all burn in hell, but isekai does have its ups along with its near insufferable downs.