Maya stumbled onto her knees. The padded underbrush of the forest floor deceived her as her knee found purchase on a thick, hidden root. The weight of JJ on her back had finally started to put a tax on her body.  Her body relented as she gently brought the sleeping lump down to the forest floor. Propping JJ’s head on a thicker section of the root, Maya fell onto her back, letting out an exasperated sigh.  

“What on Earth happened to you, June?” she said, refusing to be humored by the irony in the phrasing. She massaged her knee, attempting to wring out the pain. She grabbed a quick drink of water from the canteen she had topped off at the river.  That was right before she had doubled back to find the idiot.

She had waited for a minute or two before finally noticing that JJ had not followed her to the creek. Maya had retraced their steps to find JJ unconscious in a small clearing of trees off to the side of the game trail they had been inadvertently following. What had she been doing? No matter what she tried, Maya was not able to wake her up. It baffled her; she didn’t appear to be wounded at all. So carrying her back had seemed to be the only option. Hopefully, she would wake up soon or one of the others would come and look for them.

Maya felt utterly helpless. If she hadn’t run on ahead, she might have seen what happened. Maybe then she would’ve had a better idea on what to do. She had seemed so useless the entire time they had been in this strange place. None of the things she knew back home translated to being stranded in the wilderness. It was a wonder to her that she’d figured out how the compass worked, as she had never had to use one before. Flynn might have some idea of what to do for JJ with his limited medical knowledge. All Maya could do was stare at her friend and hope she got better. She looked peaceful at least, lying in the brush. Her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm.

It was strange, Maya had picked up on JJ’s, or Juniper’s, pronouns more naturally than she would have assumed.  As she looked over Juniper’s features, yes, one could say she had the appearance of a guy. However, that was only if you were a stranger glancing at her in the street. Maya knew Juniper; they had become surprisingly good friends these last three years. They had found many shared interests: a love for plants, similar shows they loved, emotional scenes they gushed over in all the stories they linked to each other.  When Juniper finally revealed her true self to Maya, it was like the final jigsaw piece had been plucked out from under the couch and completed the puzzle that was Juniper Jade. The way she carried herself when she was relaxed, her mannerisms, that adorable reaction she made when she was embarrassed; it made simple sense, looking back.  Sure, she looked a certain way right now. That night, however, Maya had witnessed Juniper’s soul outshine everything that might hold her back. It was all Maya could see now. Just a girl, struggling to find herself. She idly wondered what she would look like with longer hair. She felt a heat coloring her cheeks as she entertained the idea.

Maya’s distracting thoughts caught her off-guard when she suddenly heard a sharp gasp.  Maya jumped as she saw Juniper’s chest rise up into the air, a little too high for an unconscious body. A small, crescent-shaped, purple necklace flickered into existence around her neck.  As it coalesced into a solid form, it began to emit a bright light that slowly faded as her form gradually settled back down to the ground. Maya simply stared at the indescribable sight, dumbfounded at seeing what she could only assume was magic of some sort. Another gasp erupted from Juniper as she bolted upright, her short, brassy hair falling into wide eyes. Her hands immediately jumped up and towards the pendant that had appeared.

--------------------

My eyes snapped open as my body righted itself. Please. Please don’t be— My hands went to my chest instinctively, yearning for changes that merely presented themselves as phantoms now. It was to be expected, but the empty pit in my stomach still had the audacity to punch my gut in a manner quite similar to earlier in the morning.

Maya! I need to find her! Was she alright? I was about to scramble up, shoving my dysphoric thoughts aside, until I was suddenly tackled back to the ground. My head knocked itself on a thick root that was below me.

“You’re alive!” Maya cried out. “I was worried you would never wake up. Are you alright?” As haphazard as her hold was, her tight grasp compensated for the positioning. I was thoroughly pinned to the ground; black curls completely obscured my vision. The knot of anxiety that had been growing increasingly tangled the last few hours or so slowly began to unravel with Maya’s embrace. I let out a long breath, relieved to know she was safe.

“I’m fine, Maya, really,” I reassured her as she pulled away from me. I rubbed at the fresh lump on the back of my head. “I wasn’t in danger, per se; you didn’t have to worry. I was actually—”

My vision went from black curls to white spots as a radiating pain from my cheek spread through the rest of my face. I shut my eyes and worked my jaw a bit, trying to comprehend the fact that… Yes, Maya had just slapped me.

“I didn’t have to worry? OH REALLY?! I found you lying in the middle of a forest fucking unconscious, and you have the nerve to tell me I shouldn’t have worried?  That’s really not something you get to decide! Even more so when you are fucking unconscious.”

“Look, I—”

“I had to carry you on my back for an hour, not knowing if you were even going to wake up! I didn’t know what to do! I had no way of knowing how to help you! I wasn’t even sure we were going the right way!” She gave me a very pointed glare, though I saw her eyes were glistening in the light. I hadn’t seen her this angry before. I was scared and ashamed that she was so livid at me, and deservedly so. At the same time, I could feel a lot of blood rushing to my face. Whether it was embarrassment or an entirely different feeling altogether, I honestly didn’t notice at that moment. I didn’t know she was going to be so concerned…

“I’m… I’m sorry, I didn’t—"

“Then you up and start fucking glowing while a goddammed necklace just appears around your neck! Now you say, ‘Oh, it’s all fine?’ That you weren’t in danger, ‘per se?’ What type of magic fuckery was going on this time!?” 

As I sat there, scared and stunned, my mouth thought it was a good time to go on ahead without my brain. “My soul was dragged into some fey dream world. I turned into a girl while a Goddess trapped me there and she would only let me leave if I became her priestess.”

I feel as though I should stress that thoughts were not fully with me at that moment. My best friend was angry at me for (what I can readily admit was) an incredibly stupid decision I made. She wanted answers and I felt like she deserved them. Though I didn’t realize it was going to all come out the way it did. I had never really thought about how much of the encounter with Mari I was going to share. Well, it was too late now.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I got ready for another round of beratement. Five or so seconds passed before I opened up one of my eyes to squint at her. The sight I saw instead was strange to say the least. All the anger had drained from her face, replaced with a pale, completely dumbfounded look.  Her mouth was hanging slightly open, trying to get words out. I could practically see the circuits in her brain trying to process the statement.

“I’m sorry I wandered off…” I said, trying to reboot her brain. “I wasn’t thinking, and I didn’t mean to scare you, and I regretted it immediately. I’m sorry.”

Maya slowly sat down next to me, still trying to figure out what words to say. “I— Shit, are you alright? Did she hurt you? A priestess? A Goddess? Are you sure you’re okay? You didn’t just hit your head really hard?” She had begun to leaf through my hair looking for possible bruising, cursing when she found the lump she had created not a minute ago. It felt rather nice, seeing her so worried about me.

“I’m pre-e-e-tty sure it was real,” I said, waving her hands from her head inspection. “I looked exactly like I did in the dream I had last night, same… dress and everything.” My cheeks brightened as I said the words. My hand went to the new necklace that nestled between my— noticeably flat chest. I had practically felt their weight again, but my mind was only playing tricks. Very mean and evil tricks.

“This proves that it happened, at least.” I gestured to the necklace. “She told me she can find me in my dreams if I keep it on.” As I focused on the pendant, I could still feel a small well of energy inside of it, tethering me to Mari and her world. I didn’t think that the necklace would come with me to the real world. What did that even mean?

“So why don’t you just get rid of it, then?” Maya asked.

I found myself reflexively holding onto the pendant tighter than before. It was currently my only connection to that world. That world was where my body, my true body, was now. I didn’t want to do anything to risk losing it. Looking down at myself now was so disorienting. It looked and felt so wrong now. Had I always felt like this, and just had never known what normalcy was?

“I’m not sure I want to…” I said in a quiet voice.

“Sorry, what?” Maya’s color had returned to her face, her irritation was helping regain its red complexion. “You said she trapped you and forced you into her… clergy! If that’s what is letting her track you, why wouldn’t you get rid of it?”

“I mean, she was rather nice, all things considered… Besides, there’s probably more to it than just getting rid of the necklace… Also, she probably can answer a lot of questions we have, about where we are and what we might see. She has real magic, and she said she was going to train me! If she’s going to use me, I can use her too. What if I learn something that can help get us home?” I paused for a moment, thinking more selfishly. “…If she could get this necklace to come to the real world, what if she can make the body I had in that world a reality?” I blinked a few tears away, a firm grip still on the pendant. I’d certainly read enough stories back home to dare to have that hope.

Maya held her breath as if she wanted to say something else, but ended up slowly nodding in a conceding manner. She was silent for a minute before she asked, “So you were really a girl over there? How… how did it feel, being in the right body?”

“Maya…” I said, the words coming out in a shallow breath, “it changed everything.” I told her about the dream I’d had the night before and the dress I had dreamt up. I talked about the rampant dysphoria I’d had after I woke up, and the surreal out-of-body experience I was having at the moment. I ended up recounting the events of what happened in Mari’s garden as well. How scared I was, yes, but also how right everything seemed. How it felt to have Mari see me, and treat me as a girl (who, granted, had trespassed into her home) as if it was a given.  Maya just sat there and listened, letting me talk about everything I had been feeling the last day. I couldn’t describe how relieved I felt to get all of it off my chest. My knot of anxiety was meticulously picked apart and completely untangled by the time I finished talking.

“Before, I was still confused, and unsure about my identity.” I looked up at her, meeting her eyes with a confidence that I was surprised and elated to sense. “Not anymore. As scary as that world was, it dispelled any doubt as to who I am meant to be. I’m Juniper Jade, and a woman. I don’t want to hide from that any longer…”

Maya smiled as she hugged me again, one that wasn’t loaded with a surprising amount of kinetic energy. Instead, it was gentle and warm. “I’m happy for you,” she said. “Still a little weirded out by the whole fey dream world stuff, and we should probably tell everyone else about this… forced servitude… business… but I’m glad you’re finding yourself during all this craziness.”

She looked up towards the sun, which was beginning to crest over the zenith. “That being said,” Maya added, “I think we should probably be heading back to camp. I had to drink more water than I would’ve liked, trying to carry your ass through the woods. We should see if they got any luckier.”

 “You mean you aren’t going to carry me the rest of the way?” I chided. I giggled as she shoved me onto my side in order to prop herself back up.

“No, honestly I’ve a mind to make you carry me the rest of the way. Whatever may have happened in that world, it looked to me like you simply fell asleep in the middle of our all-important search for water.” Maya said, already a few strides ahead of me. “Which, by the way, is only the second laziest thing I’ve seen from you.”

“Hey, that’s not fair!” I said, catching up to her side. “I never thought you would actually come over and make dinner that night. I told you I was joking!”

“You didn’t stop me,” she countered.

“I was bedridden!”

“You got sick because you stayed up for thirty-six hours straight binging Stargate! And all you wanted was pasta!”

“It was your fault for introducing me to it… and besides, all I had was pasta!”

“And lo, my accusation of laziness stands,” she said with a cheeky grin.

I gave Maya my best glare as I stuck my tongue out at her. I then turned and stomped off toward the direction of our camp.

-----------------

As we approached the campsite about twenty minutes later, the confidence I’d had when declaring my identity to Maya and the world was beginning to falter. Should I tell them everything? Do I leave out the girl stuff? Should I just get it over with? I have no idea what to do!

I turned to Maya, “Should I tell them everything? Do I leave out the girl stuff? Should I just get it over with?”  

She eyed me with an amused expression. “Well, I feel we have to tell them about the deal you roped yourself into, right? That’s kind of a big deal.”

“Right, I figured as much…” I said.

“As for the other stuff...” Maya turned her face into another one of her serious looks. “That’s your story to tell. I’d be proud of you if you did, but I’d totally understand if you need more time.”

I took a deep breath and marched into the fray.

It was a bit chaotic when we arrived.  Apparently the three had arrived almost an hour and a half ago, and Jeremy and Flynn were arguing about whether or not they should go out to find us. Katya was sitting in her chair, nose still stuck in that book.

Relief spread through the three as they saw us. Hugs were distributed as they excitedly told us about a river they’d discovered about an hour south. They looked much more alive than they did at the beginning of the day and they couldn’t get their news out fast enough.

Flynn described a very shallow river about fifteen or twenty feet wide flowing westward at a decent clip. They had followed it downstream for a bit and, amazingly, found a small dirt trail that crossed over to our side and continued alongside the waterway.

“We came straight back here once we found it!” Flynn exclaimed. “Judging by the spacing of the trees and relatively flat ground, I’m pretty sure we should be able to weave your car through the trees and get to the trail without too much trouble.”

“You think so?” I said, cocking an eyebrow. “I’ve never driven off-road before…”

“I’m sure we can figure all that out,” Jeremy cut in. “What happened to you two out there, though? You were gone for a while; did you find anything?”

Maya and I exchanged uncertain glances. “Maya found a small creek that allowed us to fill the canteen,” I hesitated, “I… kind of stumbled into some more magic… stuff…”

“More accurately,” Maya said, “You wandered off only to have me find you unconscious on the ground.”

“Yeah…”

Their expressions made it clear that an explanation was in order. What followed was a retelling of what I had relayed to Maya in a summarized form. My dream last night in Oniralm, and my subsequent capture and coerced bargain today. I did manage to leave out all references of my decidedly different perspective in the dream world, however.

“Maya said that when I woke up this appeared around my neck.” I said, gesturing to the pendant in my hand. “It matches the one she gave me so I’m pretty sure it wasn’t some fever dream.”

Stunned silence greeted the end of my story. Katya nearly dropped the book that she must have been trying to decipher all day.  

“You… made a deal with a fey creature? Don’t those kinds of things go horribly wrong in stories?” Flynn said, leaving ample room between his words for proper mental processing.

“I mean, I didn’t really have a choice, to be fair… but there is a lot we don’t know here; hopefully Mari can shed some light on what happened to us.” I said.

“Oh, so you’re on a first name basis with this creature then?” Katya said, surprising us with her forceful voice. Her book snapped shut with a crisp thump. “Are you going to be best buddies, hanging out in your dreams, or whatever?”

“She said she was training me, or something? Apparently lucid dreaming into their world is a talent that some people have, I think she wanted to take advantage of that.” It was odd, it felt like I was defending myself. I hadn’t expected Katya to be the antagonistic voice in the group. “It’s not like I trust her completely or anything!”

Jeremy spoke up, “Hold on… are we all just okay with the fact that magic is real, then? Cause this is all just a little too much for me.” He had lowered down into the fold-out chair that Katya had previously occupied, rubbing his temples.

“You’re telling me,” Flynn murmured. “Though, if Jackson ends up going full Kvothe with this fey, I might actually be a tad jealous…”

“Flynn!” Maya yelled. “Not okay! This is serious!”

There were multiple things about envisioning that scenario which made me really uncomfortable, not even mentioning the details Flynn wasn’t aware of.  I tried not to think about it. “That is definitely not… just no. Look, if she wants to use me for whatever she thinks I’m capable of, I can use her for the knowledge she has of the world.”

“What if she decides to imprison you again the next time you fall asleep?” Katya said, concerned. “What if we can't wake you up? What are we supposed to do?”

I hesitated. She had a valid point; I didn’t think there was anything to be done if that happened. I was skeptical to believe Mari’s intentions were to keep me from the real world. She needed me to be her priestess, or whatever. I guessed that meant I needed to be here to do whatever plans she has. “That would be a problem, I will admit. Though again, I don’t think I have much of a choice anyway. It’s not like I can just stay awake forever.”

Things quieted down after that.  I did not want to stir the pot up again with the revelation that I was actually a girl.  Hearing Flynn refer to me in that way did not sit well with me either. I smiled inwardly, thinking about Maya’s comments. It almost felt like that was what she was yelling at him for. Not that the other reason was also uncalled for.

We still had about half of the day left, so we decided to try and make it to the dirt road the other three had discovered. I still got bombarded with questions about my weird experience while we packed up the SUV, but we also were all eager to find our way to civilization. Whatever that might look like.

Eventually, we got everything packed and shuffled ourselves into the Forerunner. There was a tense moment right before I turned the key on the ignition. Blessedly, the SUV hummed to life. I patted the top of the dashboard.  “Good job, girl,” I whispered. “We need to rely on you for a while, keep it up.” I looked at her tank, thankful that I had recently filled her up. The tank was at about 80%, which the dash interpreted as around 250 miles. I didn’t want to think about what would happen when we ran out of fuel.

Flynn popped his head out of the back seat. “You ever get around to naming her? Seems fitting since if it’s our only source of transportation at the moment.”

“Yeah,” Maya said, with a bemused expression. “If she’s going to be our Serenity; you’ve got to give her a good name.”

I stared at the rumbling car for a while. I hadn’t named it, though I had always meant to. Thinking about it now, I wanted her to remind us of home. She’s rugged, and we were going to be putting her off-roading skills to the test.

“Sierra,” I said, voice firm and assured. “She’s a mountain girl, she can take whatever this world has to offer.”

“Seems fitting,” Jeremy said, patting the outside of his door. “Don’t let us down, Sierra!

And just like that, we said goodbye to our point of entry into this world. The intricate, white circle that had brought us here faded from the rear-view mirror as we set our sights towards the unknown.