I tried giving this story a honest and unbiased read, and I can say that it has a lot of problems.

I'll start by describing what's good in this. The concept is interesting, I'm not a big fan of LitRPG but I can appreciate it when it's done well. The concept of having several points of views coming from the same apartments is really intriguing and opens a lot of possibilities in regards to how the reader perceives everything that is happening. If you ever consider rewriting this, I'd suggest keeping this as a fundamental core of the story.

With that being said, there isn't much else I'd keep, unfortunately. 

The characters are a complete loss. None of them are likable. Ethan is an edgy kid who believes himself to be more intelligent than anyone else, casually kills his goldfish for personnal gains, and plots a world takeover only moments after being transformed. He feels more like a strange self insert of a teenager believing himself to be superior to everyone else than anything. Byren is rude and a thief that apparently no one likes, and Mr Rajesh is a man who refers to his penis as "a spear".

Now, having an unlikable character isn't a flaw in itself. Having good antagonists or even unlikable heroes can be very beneficial to a story, but the problem here is that none of these characters have any interesting qualities. You don't "love to hate them", you just "hate them", and that's it. It makes them really bland, as there is nothing special about them, they're just horrible people with no personality outside of their disdain and hatred.

More than that, their behavior isn't realistic. The world just drastically changed, and in seconds, Ethan and Rajesh both have accepted that people have turned into monsters. No doubt, no panic, nothing. Sure they do say things like "This feels weird" and "What is happening", but none of it really shows the impact the transformation should have on them.

Writing a mundane world suddenly gaining supernatural or magical elements can be really challenging, as the characters do not have the time required for them to get acquainted to their new reality. Still, authors will usually have them panic and struggle with the changes even a little bit, which you absolutely haven't done here.

It's thus really difficult to empathise with them. Why is Rajesh worried about minor water damages while the world is being thrown asunder? What is he actually thinking, why is that so important now?

The world building also has issues that need to be fixed. Chapter 2 is almost unreadable, as a literal ton of information is dropped onto the reader, most of which we do not need to know about right away. Information about the characters' powers should be given in small doses throughout the chapters, as they become relevant, not just dumped into a single chapter. Doing this makes it really hard to remember everything and made me feel like I was reading a textbook rather than fiction. Other than that, as I said in the introduction, the world is interesting. I'd probably criticize the spontaneous orgasm you gave your MC, as I don't really understand why that would be important, and the gore and egg laying seemed really gross and unnecessary. What were you trying to accomplish?

Another point to address is the way you have to suddenly describe events happening in different places, like you did in your prologue chapter. It's an interesting tool to use, as it can give a wider view of the world, but it's also really confusing as you keep doing it again and again. What do we gain from knowing someone transformed into a specific creature and ate someone if that character won't become relevant? Why do I need extremely specific examples of people being monsters? What does it bring to the story? The answer is nothing much.

Similarly, let's talk about onomatopoeia (Clank, boom, crash, that sort of thing). These sound effects are very interesting in a comic book, where you cannot dedicate a lot of space to descriptions. They get the job done when combined with visuals. In prose, however? It just looks childish, like you do not know how to describe what is happening and would rather just let random sounds do the job. Please write actual descriptions, they are much more interesting than something like *CRACK*

There is much more to be said, but I'm going to leave this as is. I wouldn't recommend reading this, as there are much better works on this website, some very similar to this one, which do everything this story is trying to do, but better.

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This is pretty good... sadly as the other review said, I don't really feel too attached to the MC. I actually like Byren better lol

The MC is just a little too crazy for my liking

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