
I screamed with all my might when Reyn killed my parents and my brother in front of my eyes. Their blood soaked my wedding gown. I tried to approach them but I couldn't get away from the soldiers who held me.
I turned my face to Reyn and looked at him in anger, my face filled with tears.
"Reyn! You're crazy! I was wrong about you!"
Reyn approached me with an arrogant face. A sly smile adorned his lips and his hand holding a bloody sword. He held my chin with his hand, soaking my face with the blood of my own family.
"Eve, Eve, Eve, you're so naive ... You don't know how long I have to be patient waiting for this moment? To rule the kingdom of Euthenia ?!"
I looked at Reyn in disappointment, anger and sadness. He was the man I loved, my fiance, but in just one day he turned into a devil in my eyes.
I turned my face away to release my chin and swept my gaze around the palace hall. Our wedding decorations were stained with blood, the bodies of Euthenia's soldiers were scattered everywhere. The kingdom flag of Euthenia beside the throne has changed into the kingdom flag of Aeros. My wedding day which was supposed to be the happiest day of my life turned into a nightmare...
I lowered my head when I could no longer see it. I lost everything in just one day. I told him my last wish.
"Kill me, " I could only hope to reunite with my family after death.
He gave me an evil laugh.
"You are my wife, how could I kill you?" He brought his face close to my ear and whispered.
"I will sacrifice you to Lord Damon."
My eyes widened when I heard it. Damon Arcano Malignus was the strongest Demon Lord of the dark dimension who wanted to rule the world ten years ago, but with the cooperation of all the kingdoms on the Vihrasil Continent, the kingdom of Aeros succeeded in defeating him.
Reyn retreated with a sly smile.
"Take her!"
I screamed and struggled to get away, but the soldiers pulled me roughly toward the basement. While Reyn walked behind us, ignoring my screams.
We entered a damp cellar. Several black-robed people had gathered in the room around a strange magic formation that I had never seen before.
'Black Magic.'
Reyn stood in front of me and swung his sword expertly at me, tearing all my dresses without a trace. I screamed again. I had never been humiliated like this.
But he responded to my screams with his evil laughter that echoed throughout the room.
The soldiers dragged me into the middle of the magic formation, laid me there then held my hands and feet. The black-robed people around me chant a strange spell. I desperately tried to get away from them but in vain.
It was not long before, the magic formation behind me glowed. Several skeleton hands came out from there and began to hold my body. The soldiers that held me immediately released their grip and retreated with scared expressions. I screamed again when I felt the cold skeleton hands crawling and touching my skin. I struggled, but the skeleton hands grip was even stronger than the soldier's grip earlier. The skeleton hands that appeared from inside the magic formation were increasing and began to slowly pull my body into the formation. I kept struggling and screaming while Reyn just looked at me in disdain.
Before my body sank, I stared at Reyn sharply.
"Reyn Whitelight! One day I will make you pay for what you have done today! I will take everything from you!" I screamed in frustration.
Soon, my whole body sank into the magic formation and my vision darkened.
Reyn stared at the dim magic formation before him and gave another sly smile.
"Lord Damon will eat your body and soul. I want to know how you get revenge."
After reading this I realized that English may not be your strong suit but I'm also not a native English speaker so imma tell you this, there's some wonky English in this, so might need to improve that.
Secondly, Reyn's dialogue is kind of... Skeletor-like, i.e Saturday morning cartoon villain of the week type of character. If his dialogue makes me think of Skeletor or Kaiba's voice, unless if it's your intention you should probably rewrite his bit dude.
But overall it's a rocky start, but I'm just reading this today so let's see how the rest of your story works out!
Thank you for your feedback. English is not my native language, but I will tried to improve it. About Reyn, you mean kaiba from yu gi oh?
@Nanakawaichan yup!
@Chaaruzu_Corner If you mean kaiba in the original voice (Japanese), yes that's the way he talk. Annoying and arrogant
Tq for the chap. Unless I'm mistaken, isn't he going to get the kingdom anyway from marrying her?
Nope, she have a brother. Her brother should be the next king. Beside he want to take over her kingdom completely not only an alliance.
@Nanakawaichan Couldn’t he have had her brother eventually assassinated and then inherited the kingdom.
@purpleeee nope, he want conquer it. It will be on the story later. He want to conquer one continent under his rule. Her kingdom is only the beginning.
Thanks for the chapter
You welcome
Okay. Thanks for the chap.
I'm sure you would improve your English.
Keep this story going, read the prologue only and I really like what I've read so far. Also hope to see many more stories from you.
All the best
This really sucked me in! Thanks!
Ohko is here
I'm shock
@Nanakawaichan Wait, why shocked? xD
@ohko Maybe because I usually see you on forums
The introduction of this chapter is interesting, although it could have been better if there is a depth in the character's emotions. For example, Reyn's thoughts and actions could have been shown in a much darker and intricate way and as for Eve's despair and rage, I almost could not feel her characterization with those emotions. Anyways, this is just the beginning. I will be hoping for improvements for the following chapters :)).
Thank you for your feedback
U welcome
Hi I'm new reader and I stared to like
there are so many people with light in their surname