Setting her expensive designer staff off to the side, Zutiria’s hands enter the very first treasure chest in her career as an adventurer.

She takes the valuable goods out from inside it and turns to face the party, revealing the contents of her haul. In her right hand, the Mage holds two glass bottles filled with a vivid, blue-glowing liquid and in her left is a small, beautiful ornamental yellow star with a clasp and chain hooked around the top.

‘Mana potions, Sir. I’d say the altercation was more than a fair trade, even without taking into consideration the extra trinket that came along with it.’

“Wonderful,” I tell her as I breathe a sigh of relief.

I’m now grateful to Luxy from the bottom of my heart. As I’ve already said more than anything else, I was terrified of sending Zutiria off without any way to replenish her already crippled mana reserve...

While two mana potions isn’t a lot, it’s better than what we had before- nothing.

The Goddess doesn’t respond even as I try to thank her. She might be limiting her contact now that we’ve infiltrated the Pimpfort, if I had to guess. Knowing that she can’t interfere, it might be a conflict of interest. Perhaps she’d be tempted to give away too much if our dialogue was open, as well?

It doesn’t really matter. I turn my attention towards the star on a chain that the little Mage carries in her left hand. “And what about the artifact?” I ask while zooming in the camera to get a better view.

Zutiria opens up her adventurer’s pack and tucks in both of her acquired potions. Then, she buckles the bag back up nice and proper-like once they’re secure. ‘It’s a rare charm known as a Wishing Star. Truthfully, I’ve always had my eyes on one, but they’re exceedingly difficult to acquire and even harder to make.’

“Aren’t you a super-skilled alchemist, Zuzu? Why couldn’t you make one of these things if you wanted it so bad?”

‘Well, for one, you have to have a fragment of an actual star from the void between realms to make one. Secondly, making powerful magic equipment is not alchemy. We’ve been over this. Creating enchanted items is more than just casting a spell on something. It’s-’

“Look, Sam. Magic is magic. If Zutiria says she can’t do something, then we have no reason to doubt her.”

“But she made the Return Gate! And Returners, too!”

‘Yes, Sammy. I put magic and alchemical solutions on a big pile of rocks that I ground up and made little bombs that take you to the rocks when you throw them. That’s completely different.’

“Magic is inconsistent and stupid,” The Princess crosses her arms, scrunching up her face with frustration.

‘I do not deny that. Admittedly it’s better if you just don’t think about it too hard.’ Zutiria sighs and hangs her head, tired of having to explain the machinations of a system that is hard for even the most learned arcane scholars of the Tior province to understand.

“S-So, what does it do? Does it actually grant wishes...?!” Meri’s eyes sparkle. Her eagerness is bringing out that adorable part of her that resembles a puppy dog.

‘If only. It still has a pretty lovely effect, though. Once per day, the user can cast one spell without needing to use their mana. Before anyone asks, this resets at midnight, and the effects do not carry over... just in case any of you try to be cheeky with your comments.’

I ask Zutiria the first thing that comes to mind upon hearing that. “Can it give you access to any of the spells in your spell list that are currently grayed out?” 

‘I don’t think so... I have to be able to cast it normally, Sir.’

Figures, but magic is magic.

“Just once a day? That’s kinda shitty. But... I guess it’ll let you use a really big spell in an emergency, which is great!” Sam pats the Mage on the shoulder.

“Sounds perfect for you, Zutiria!” Meri chimes in before a thoughtful expression overtakes her face. “Uh. Speaking of perfect, I was wondering... so... the Goddess chose this out herself, right? She’s not just gonna get us a bunch of useful thingies we’ve always wanted a-and try to get on our good side... is she...?”

Upon the Shield Maiden’s question, everyone goes silent as the night.

It’s a known fact that none of the girls are very keen on my divine supporter, especially Meri, and I myself have a complex view regarding Luxy. Given how openly manipulative the Goddess can be, I wouldn’t put this motive past her... even if I personally don’t believe Luxy is doing this for that reason.

I think she really does want to help.

“Does it matter what her intention behind the gifts are, so long as they make you all stronger?” I sigh, trying to keep them all united and as far away from dwelling on negative things as I can.

The party grumbles about it for a hot minute before agreeing that no, it’s not that big of a deal. They would rather have awesome magic gear versus rejecting said awesome magic gear just to make a point to Lux Ultima.

“You’re going to have to tell me about your relationship with the Goddess sometime, Myaster...” Snow tilts her head. “Given how apprehensive they all seem whenever the topic is at hand, and after hearing her voice first hand, well, paw... she seems...”

“I would love to tell you more, Snow, but you’re leaving in two days. Aren’t you? After we rescue the girls, I assume you’ll be busy all day tomorrow.”

“...Ah. You’re right.” The maid replies in a somber, expressionless tone.

“Unless...” Peri mews.

“Don’t push it,” Cherry sighs, reminding her.

“That’s quite enough standing around then. Mistresses, you’ve all thoroughly explored this corner of the dungeon. Might I suggest returning to the first chamber and taking the door to the north, nyaa?” Snow takes command of the party in the hopes of deflecting her awkward situation.

I don’t stop her, and in fact, I leave the office to use the restroom for a few minutes while ordering the kitties to refill the coffee. The party is only backtracking through rooms they’ve already been in at the moment, anyway.

While washing up after doing what anyone must, my thoughts become clouded. I look into the mirror, seeing my own introspective face staring straight back at me. Pimpington was an adventurer, it seems...

All of the comments he made while antagonizing us make a lot more sense now.

I don’t think whatever happened to him was as simple as the girls might think. Sure, he was probably in love with the other woman in the diorama, but... something just isn’t right. No, if all it took to break the spirit of a prestigious knight like him was a simple rejection, then we’d have a lot fewer knights running around Imperalis.

Whether we like it or not, I guess we’ll find out as the party progresses through the Pimpfort.

The only thing I know for sure is that no matter what takes place when the girls finally make it to the boss room, I won’t lose my cool against him.

Not again.

Growing tired of seeing myself in the mirror, I finish washing my hands and head back to the office.

“Status report, kitties?”

The three Catfolk turn to face me as soon as I enter the room. To my surprise, Peri and Cherry have both begun cleaning up around the place during my absence.

“Myaster, Snow wants us to make ourselves useful...” Peri whines, sweeping at the floor slowly with a broom. “I don’t want to be useful. I want to watch the adventure, nyaa...”

“Do you want her to pull out her crop, Peri?” Cherry frowns while feather dusting one of my many bookshelves.

“N-No... not right NOW, anyway...” Replies the kitten with more than a hint of thirst.

Snow watches the maids at work with a satisfied grin on her face. “Less chattering, girls. Honestly. No wonder that room out there is still so dirty. You really need someone around who can-”

Snow stops dead in her tracks, stopping herself from what she was about to say.

“Say it,” Peri whispers.

“Someone who can do what, Snow?” I smile a sadistic grin of my own after walking to the desk and taking my coffee.

“...Absolutely nothing of importance, Myaster. Pay it no mind.” She mumbles as her grumpiness increases.

I take an obnoxious sip of my coffee to tease her a little bit. “You see, it almost sounded like you were about to imply that I need to find myself someone who knows how to run a tight crew of housekeepers. Someone familiar with Peri and Cherry who could help push them to their limits. A... head maid, of sorts?”

“Myaster,” She says, slitting her eyes in a threatening way while adding venom to her voice. “I believe the girls are waiting for you, nyaa.”

The look in her striking yellow eyes tells me If I keep pushing it, she’s going to hurt me, and it won’t be in an enjoyable way. So I decide to stop teasing Snow for now. Instead, I turn my attention back to the three Taskmaster screens and see that the party of adventurers has just about reached their destination.

“I’m back, girls. Status?”

“All good, Boss. Heading through the door right now!” 

‘I put the Wishing Star on my staff,’ Zutiria smiles cutely and lifts up her staff for me to see it better. Her new charm twinkles like a real star as it dangles from the arch on the top of her heart-shaped staff, which she attached the chain to.

“We also had some of our snacks,” Meri says while wiping some jerky crumbs from her lips.

Once everyone has reported in, Sam hits the phallic-shaped switch on the center of the northern door, and within seconds the entrance opens up.

The three girls delve into the proceeding chamber of the Pimpfort.

It turns out to be a very similar room to the southern one, about the same size and everything. There aren’t any fixtures holding roses, but there is a square-shaped jail cell in the center wall. Inside of this cell, there’s another treasure chest, and there are no other doors to speak of. There isn’t anything that leads me to believe there might be any secret rooms this time, either.

I assume that opening the jail cell containing the chest has something to do with defeating the five members of Pimpington’s elite hooker squad who are strewn about the room. In the northwest corner stands a red-headed halfling woman who appears dangerously young by human standards. Not all halfling girls look like that, but the ones that do can lead a man to strange, unsettling places...

One of her hands rests on the hilt of a rogueish-looking short sword strapped to a belt across her waist, while the other holds a traditional wooden pipe to her lips. Given the red coloration in the white of her eyes, she seems to be smoking steezweed. As the halfling stares down the intruding adventurers, she begins blowing wondrous smoke rings with remarkable skill.

In the center of the room are two more women seated at a wooden table. On the right-hand side is a blue-skinned, white-haired Frost Dwarf with a long, braided ponytail and covered head to toe in Midgardian Viking tattoos. The other woman is the huge, green-skinned orc girl who sucked Pimpington’s dick as he rode off in his chariot the other day. I couldn’t forget her if I tried...

I think the Dwarf and the Orc were playing strip poker at some point since their micro bikini tops and bottoms are on the table with the rest of the chips, but I guess it didn’t last long, and they transitioned to playing standard poker. Not the best game to play when your uniform consists of only two pieces of clothing.

Lastly, in the opposite corner of the room to the questionable-looking Halfling is a Human, hunched over and heaving, and an Elf rubbing the Human’s back in an effort to comfort her.

“Shit,” The Orc stands up as her chair flies backward, grabbing a large warhammer from the floor. She’s barely able to stand in this low-ceiling room, being at least eight feet tall and covered in rippling muscle. “They’re here!”

The Frost Dwarf follows the Orc’s example, retrieving a Midgardian raider’s axe and standing at the ready. “Odin’s beard!” She exclaims in shock, her voice sounding as rough as the cracking of ice on stone.

Not long after that, the halfling draws her tiny short sword and hops atop the table, ready to strike. “Are they real this time, or are they still in my head...?” The teensy girl with large, furry feet asks with a sleepy yawn.

“They’re real, silly little Wenda,” Says the Elf as she pulls a small wand out of the back of her golden thong, brandishing it in front of her as she joins the three other women in front of the table. “We got orders to defend the chest, but do you three mind if our friend over there in the corner, Chantella, skips this little brawl, kids?”

‘I’m thirty-five.’ Zutiria defiantly holds out her staff, making a point of her age.

“And I’m two thousand, five hundred, and seventy-six, KID. Now can we agree on leaving out the pregnant hooker?”

“...I mean, I guess?” Sam shrugs. “More important question- haven’t any of you bitches ever heard of armor?” She asks without a single shred of irony.

Zutiria and even Meri both give the dense Princess a judgmental look of pity. All I can do is have a long sip from my coffee and sigh as Snow holds back laughter at my side.

“Girls, I’m going to be honest. You don’t need my help on this one. Make me proud.” I don’t want to hold their hand completely through this dungeon, and honestly, if they can’t defeat a group of low-leveled stripper thugs on their own, then this whole mission is screwed.

Sam, Meri, and Zutiria’s faces all light up at the same time, excited that they have a chance to show off to me.

“You got it, Boss!” Sam puts up her fists, knowing that the use of her sword in such a small, crowded chamber is entirely impossible.

“Yes, Master!” For the same reason, Meri transforms her shield into its buckler form, and the short sword pops out over the top of her gauntlet. Just from looking at it, I can see the energy coating the blade’s edge. She’s using Blunt Edge- flawlessly, at that. Good.

‘Understood, Sir.’ Zutiria has nothing much to add, so she just stands there with her hands on her staff.

The group of strippers stares at my three adventurers in awkward silence. Eventually, the halfling tilts her head. “Yo, you sluts got voices in your head, too?”

Chantella throws up in the corner with violent fervor as the battle begins.