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SCENE MOUNTAIN TOP

 

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Ai Douya:

We finally made it!

 

Ai Douya:

It's been a journey!

 

Da Hong Zao:

Yeah, it's been quite an interesting one.

 

Ai Douya:

Oh! I see something shiny there!

 

Ai Douya:

Let's take a look!

 

 

Ai Douya:

It’s really a golden scroll!

 

Ai Douya:

We've found it!

 

Da Hong Zao:

So easily?

 

Old Man's Voice:

He he he! Finally!

 

Ai Douya:

Shifu!

 

Ai Douya:

What are you doing here?

 

Shifu:

Douya, you've done well.

 

Shifu:

I have a surprise for you. To tell the truth, I'm not actually your Shifu.

 

Ai Douya:

What!?

 

Shifu has changed his name to Actually Not Shifu.

 

Actually Not Shifu:

Now, now, don't look like that. It's true that your Shifu is already long dead.

 

Actually Not Shifu:

But I didn't kill him. He died of a heart attack after peeping at me suck Yang energy from a super cute young master.

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

So he's a true man of culture.

 

Actually Not Shifu:

I know, right?

 

Actually Not Shifu:

He totally died the right way.

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

It's the death I dream of having.

 

Da Hong Zao:

...

 

Da Hong Zao:

I don't follow...

 

Actually Not Shifu:

Anyway, Douya, give me the scroll.

 

Ai Douya:

What do you want to do with it!?

 

Actually Not Shifu:

To become a high level Yang energy-sucking monster, of course!

 

Actually Not Shifu:

I tricked you into coming here because I need the scroll and a Yang energy source at the same time.

 

Actually Not Shifu:

I'll unfold the scroll and then suck your Yang energy for three days and three nights in a row.

 

Actually Not Shifu:

Now come, Douya! Give it to me!

 

Ai Douya:

No!

 

Ai Douya:

Mostly because it's gross that you look like my Shifu.

 

Actually Not Shifu:

Oh, is that a problem?

 

Actually Not Shifu:

I actually have an alluring body, you know?

 

Actually Not Shifu:

Watch!

 

 

Actually Not Shifu has changed his name to Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body.

 

Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body:

Heh! How's this?

 

Ai Douya:

What on earth!?

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

Not bad.

I can get behind this.

 

Da Hong Zao:

I...

 

Da Hong Zao:

I seriously don't follow...

 

Ai Douya:

I...!

 

Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body:

Eh, Douya, you don't like it?

 

 

Ai Douya:

...Eh...

Well...

 

Da Hong Zao:

Tch! I can't take this elephant poo-poo anymore!

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

Douya, what do you want to do?

 

-----------

Menu

 

I’ll fight him myself!

Let’s fight together!

------------

Menu selected: "Let’s fight together!"

 

Ai Douya:

Let’s fight him together!

 

Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body:

Three against one?

Seriously?

 

Da Hong Zao:

Get him!

 

 

Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body:

Urgh...

 

Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body:

To die so young and yet so old…

 

Monster Not-Shifu With Surprisingly Alluring Body:

I didn’t even get to share my backstory…

 

Ai Douya:

Shifu...

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

Douya...

 

Ai Douya:

It's alright. I'll be fine.

 

Da Hong Zao:

Anyway, now that your Shifu's gone and you've got nowhere to return to, what will you do now?

 

Ai Douya:

Continue my journey of course!

 

Da Hong Zao:

I see!

 

Da Hong Zao:

I wish you luck! Douya, see you around in the Jianghu!

Da Hong Zao has left your party.

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

Hmm...

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

I suppose I'll have to tag along then.

 

Ai Douya:

Huh? What? Why?

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

Well, you know...

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

I just can't leave you alone...

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

Besides, you'll bump into monsters along the road.

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

If I come along, I can watch.

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

I mean, I can help you out when you're in trouble.

 

Ai Douya:

.........I don't buy it.

 

Xizhang Tiangua:

(Smiles)

 

Ai Douya:

....!!!

 

Ai Douya:

 (That smile is surprisingly blinding...)

 

And so begins a new journey for them! See you guys next time!

 

Cue sexy lo-fi hentai music for credits!

 

 

Download the visual danmei here!