Another day, another cube blanket. I didn’t particularly enjoy the last physical blanket I had, but at least it didn’t dissolve when I moved. I pick up a larger cube from the disappearing mass and toss it lightly in the sky, catching it and repeating the action as it desperately wiggles in the air. Where do the night cubes come from? I know I sleep with my mouth closed. Honestly, I ought to figure out a proper name for my cubes beyond ‘cubes’ or ‘goop’. It’s not vomit, I’m fairly certain. I’m no expert but I think that a young child can’t live through puking out whatever that is. 

Stop thinking and start moving. The rock from yesterday returned to lovingly dig into my hip. Off to the distance it goes, most likely to return.  All annoying things always return…always.

Did red-feather die last night? I wasn’t able to figure out to make fire, and the ground’s damp but he did have all those cloaks on him; it’d be a bit of a bummer if he died after all I did. Time to check on him, and see if he’ll be a bit more receptive to eating giant bug today- it’s the best-tasting meat I’ve ever had. The competition is thin, but the thought counts.

I pick my way back to the clearing, poking at bushes with a stick off the ground, occasionally waving it like a weapon at an imaginary foe with a ‘hyah!’ every few steps. Might be taking out a ghost or two. Armed and dangerous, that I am.

Did I get the wrong clearing? There’s blood from yesterday, and that one guy’s brain matter…yeah I’ve got the right place. Speaking of, I probably desperately need a bath but my brain starts to scream a little when I think about the river, so maybe later. Bodies gone, that idiot's gone, and a lot of footsteps. The idiot must have been kidnapped, or rescued. Either way, he won’t die due to my interaction with him. He was alive when I last saw him, I swear Mr. Guard! Heh.

So red-feather and company are gone, but that just means more time to eat the rest of the bug. Leftovers time. It died near the same hill as my cave, right? I didn’t draw a map but following the giant stab-holes in the ground might be an indication of where it went. Off I scamper.

Following the very messy trail of destruction, rather than my bounty, I find a giant puddle of…muck of some kind. It’s as if a very sick giant gave way to ills and forgot to wash away the mess. I wrinkle my nose at the smell.

“>Fuck.<” I spat at the puddle, then turn away and begin the walk back to my cave, intending to fill up on a nearby bush and settle for a nap before following the footprints to where I assume civilization is. I’m sure I could learn how to survive in the wild, but I am very small and very easy to eat. Yesterday was probably a fluke, and I’m not willing to test that hypothesis.

I find a decent-sized bush and squat on the ground, getting comfortable before searching for the sourest berries first. They’re crunchy, which would be a good wake-up this morning-ish time. A stick breaks behind me and I sigh at the cliche of it all before turning around.

There are two men and one woman in cloth armor with leather bits strapped here and there. On their chest armor, there’s a tree set over a sun; probably a sign of what they belong to. The woman spots me, she is the single tallest person I’ve ever seen, easily a hand taller than both the men “Is 'e' a puq qoj a kobold?¹ Is that a child or a kobold?” she asks before the shorter man smacks the back of her head in irritation. 

“'oh’s obviously a puq tlhih moron, the real yu' is nuqdaq 'oh came from.² It’s obviously a child you moron, the real question is where it came from”

“Chaq 'oh was abandoned? Doch has freaky eyes. Dead parha' a ghoti'.³ Maybe it was abandoned? Thing has freaky eyes. Dead like a fish”

“Yellow isn’t 'e' uncommon of a color tlhih reprobate! Kid ghaytan came from Femun, lan isn’t je far from nadev…⁴ Yellow isn’t that uncommon of a color you reprobate! Kid probably came from Femun, place isn’t too far from here…”

The taller man piped up “Wasn’t”.

“Yeah, wasn’t. Though jih still qub the dol qul doch was a vey-up; for 'oh to meq 'e' hard, 'oh neh doesn’t qas.⁵ Yeah, wasn’t. Though I still think the whole fire thing was a set-up; for it to burn that hard, it just doesn’t happen.”

The woman approaches me slowly and begins talking in a soothing tone, “Neh stay nice an’ still for aunty Pat…⁶ Just stay nice an’ still for aunty Pat…”

“Aunty? Tlhih’re old mevyap to qu' a goddamn matriarch, fuckin’ aunty bullshi-⁷ Aunty? You’re old enough to be a goddamn matriarch, fuckin’ aunty bullshi-”

“Pipe down! Mah ain’t hunting 'op mute guttersnipe through these ghuy' bushes.⁸ Pipe down! We ain’t hunting some mute guttersnipe through these damn bushes.”

“Dale if tlhih ever-⁹Dale if you ever-”

By this point, I’ve been hefted into the woman’s arms and I’m just sorta chilling as the three loudmouths carry on with this comedy show. The taller man slaps the back of the red-faced shorter man but the group quickly settle their faces and start marching towards the source of the footprints. The idiots continue chattering on:

“Is the kid a qu''hom qoj lodhom?¹⁰Is the kid a girl or boy?”

“Loy mah’ll tlhob the matron¹¹ Guess we’ll ask the matron”

“D’ya qub ghah’ll jang? Brun’s paghlogh pitlh vay' for free.¹² D’ya think she’ll answer? Brun’s never done anything for free.”

“Naw, ghah owes jih from hochdich spring; ghah’ll talk.¹³ Naw, she owes me from last spring; she’ll talk.”

The taller man pulled a small flower from the ground and passed it over to me. I sniff it, expecting a smell and only receiving a small chuckle from the woman holding me,

“Little beastie” She pokes at my face with a gloved finger. I gently grab her finger before it retreats and hold it, considering trying to bite it; despite my nefarious plans the woman cooperatively leaves the hand near my face as I inspect it. The shorter man also pokes his hand towards my face but I ignore it in favor of the prey already in hand.

“Dale 'oh seems parha' vabdot kids sov maj wejwa'. Must qu' a qu''hom considering chay' tlhih suq on with ‘em¹⁴ Dale it seems like even kids know good taste. Must be a girl considering how you get on with ‘em”

“Fuck off, ain’t tlhih seen the qad under the lam? ‘S clearly a lodhom. Little brat’s neh trying to decsue a norce.¹⁵ Fuck off, ain’t you seen the face under the dirt? ‘S clearly a boy. Little brat’s just trying to seduce a crone.”

“Dale if my qam doesn’t tu' its way up your sa'hut by the van of the jaj jih’ll qu' called a saint.¹⁶ Dale if my foot doesn’t find its way up your ass by the end of the day I’ll be called a saint.”

The shorter man and my ride continue to talk to one another all the way through the woods and down a hill to a squat, wide building set by itself. They knock on the door where a visibly unhappy woman peeks out, growing more displeased looking until she's visibly glowering when she spots me,

“The ghe'tor’s this?¹⁷The hell’s this?” She frowns.