So I'm just gonna start this off by saying that I REALLY REALLY want to see more of this novel. This novel extremely unique and I absolutely love it. If this fulfills my expectations even only slightly it will be my favorite work on the site. However, some things in the novel could be improved or changed.
1. This novel is very very over descriptive, whenever somebody's outfit or when describing an area the author realllllly goes full throttle on the descriptions, sometimes having several paragraphs dedicated to them. This is far too much and I find it difficult to care about the things being described because of just how much they are described. Please tone it down, you don't need to describe everything so thoroughly.
2. The authors use of tense can be a bit iffy at times. Now I don't have any trouble with tense and can barely recognize when they change. Some (most) people can't handle shifts like this so maybe try to improve on that.
3. The pacing is good and I enjoy it, but it's gonna take a while for the story to finish. Most authors iv seen who have this pacing give up the story at some point and never finish it. I would rather see the story completed (or just not dropped) then have perfect pacing. If the author can handle the amount of writing needed to complete a novel with this pacing then f**king go for it I believe in you!
Ah I just wanna end this by saying that I really really REALLY REALLY hope and I mean REALLY HOPE that the MC actually loses her humanity and fully becomes the terrifyingly wicked bitch that we all want her to be. I sincerely hope this doesn't become another sh*tty redemption story because we have all read tons of those. Evil (and actually evil not some two bit "im gonna be an edgy-er version of an anti-hero" bullsh*t) MC all the way. Either way this isn't my story and regardless of direction the story is and will still be great.
It begins as a usual isekai story.
No, wait. It`s worse. It’s otome isekai. And I`m the villain.
Of course, there must be some kind of cheat to make up for it. It’s that kind of story.
And my cheat is… being a s
Yukiyo Shinohara lived in the age where VRMMORPG was everywhere right after chatting with her best friend, she went to catch a snack in the kitchen but saw a thief who then stabbed her and turned on her VR device. After waking up seeing her body w
Those fools under-powered my summoning ceremony and I was ‘left with the bag’. With inadequate soul potential, I’ve had to curse myself to create an opportunity to live, perhaps live well in this new world. Or…maybe I just
One day in 2019, the United States of America finds itself transported to a new world.
What will happen if a modern superpower from Earth finds itself in a world with magic and technology ranging from the medieval era to World War 1? F-22 R
What happens when a man gets transported into a foreign world filled with magic?
Will his knowledge in hardware technology help him out after he discovers its correlation to the words of power?
How will he fit in with the other noble
So I'm just gonna start this off by saying that I REALLY REALLY want to see more of this novel. This novel extremely unique and I absolutely love it. If this fulfills my expectations even only slightly it will be my favorite work on the site. However, some things in the novel could be improved or changed.
1. This novel is very very over descriptive, whenever somebody's outfit or when describing an area the author realllllly goes full throttle on the descriptions, sometimes having several paragraphs dedicated to them. This is far too much and I find it difficult to care about the things being described because of just how much they are described. Please tone it down, you don't need to describe everything so thoroughly.
2. The authors use of tense can be a bit iffy at times. Now I don't have any trouble with tense and can barely recognize when they change. Some (most) people can't handle shifts like this so maybe try to improve on that.
3. The pacing is good and I enjoy it, but it's gonna take a while for the story to finish. Most authors iv seen who have this pacing give up the story at some point and never finish it. I would rather see the story completed (or just not dropped) then have perfect pacing. If the author can handle the amount of writing needed to complete a novel with this pacing then f**king go for it I believe in you!
Ah I just wanna end this by saying that I really really REALLY REALLY hope and I mean REALLY HOPE that the MC actually loses her humanity and fully becomes the terrifyingly wicked bitch that we all want her to be. I sincerely hope this doesn't become another sh*tty redemption story because we have all read tons of those. Evil (and actually evil not some two bit "im gonna be an edgy-er version of an anti-hero" bullsh*t) MC all the way.
Either way this isn't my story and regardless of direction the story is and will still be great.
grammer is no issue from what iv seen
Read More