Riri and I made it outside and away from Jason. 

As soon as we got in her car, I popped the question that was on my mind. “What happened between you and Jason?” 

As soon as I asked this question, Riri gripped her steering wheel and took a deep breath. “Jeff..Are you..bi?” 

“No!” First Hannah, now her! “Why does everyone think that?!” 

“You tell me!” Riri snapped back, her eyes flaring. 

“I have no idea! That’s why I’m asking you!” I retorted back.

Riri pointed her finger in my face. “It’s because your boyfriend ran around school like a chicken with its head cut off!”

“Uh.. What?” I was kind of dumbfounded, and didn’t really know what to say. 

“Yes! Once he found out that you left with me, he wouldn’t leave me alone!” Riri yelled exasperatedly, as she held her head in frustration. 

I.. why does he care so much??? I mean.. I can understand that maybe he's nice.. but that’s a bit.. too far, right? 

Riri sighed loudly before reclining into her seat. “So what happened between you and mcthottie?” 

“Who?” I looked at Riri and she returned my stare with a blank one. “Oh..you mean.. her...” 

“Sooo????” Riri asked exaggeratedly. 

My chest tightened, and my stomach turned. “I don’t want to talk about it.” 

Riri looked confused and her brows furrowed. “Are you serious?” 

My vision started getting blurry, and I was having a rough time catching my breath. “Please.”

Riri's mouth flapped open, but quickly closed without any words coming out. 

We sat in the car in silence, neither one knowing where to go from here. 

“Jeff.” Riri said.

“Yeah.” I answered flatly.

“I..I’m sorry.” Riri struggled to say, cutting on her car in the process. “L-Let's go pick up Mizuki and get something to eat!” 

“Yeah. Thanks….” I don’t know how to feel, or what to say. 

We drove all the way to the station in silence. No music, no road rage, nothing.

“Hey Riri!” Mizuki’s cheerful voice resounded as she slammed the car door. 

“Hey Zuki!” Riri responded with a laugh and a smile.

When did they become cool? Was it when I was in the hospital? Why do I feel weird about them being cool? Does that make me a bad person? 

“So how come you’re here?” Mizuki asked. 

Riri rolled her eyes. “Tell me you don’t want to see me without telling me that you don’t want to see me.” 

“No. No. No. it’s not that way!” Mizuki shouted as she waved her hands.  

Riri started laughing, her smile blossoming. “What do yall wanna eat? I’m buying.” 

Mizuki and I reasonably turned to stare at Riri, both caught off guard by her statement. 

Riri’s face transitioned from surprised to angry. “Wow! Really?! Is it that surprising?!” 

“Yes.” Mizuki and I answered in unison. 

“What the?!” Riri waved her arms in the air in exasperation, before pointing to Mizuki. “I drove your brother to the hospital! After he threw up in Solange! Do you know how much I had to spend to get it detailed?!”

“..Sorry.” I chimed in. 

“Yes you are!” Riri snapped back. “You’re lucky Solange is okay.”

Riri rubbed her dashboard while glaring at me. I felt kind of guilty and turned to look out the window. 

Music started playing and Riri started driving. In no time, we arrived at a restaurant called the lazy cat. It was an inconspicuous small brick building on the corner of the street. The sign for the lazy cat was red and white, somewhat faded and small. It was kind of a hole in the wall type of place. 

Riri parked and we stepped out of the car.

“You drove.. Normal.” Mizuki commented. 

Oh yeah.. She did drive normally. I was too caught up in my own head to notice. 

“Well duh. I don’t want him puking in my car again.” Riri answered. “Why do yall always have something to say about my driving?! I can drive!”

Mizuki and I started walking towards the restaurant. We learned our lesson last time.

“Don’t walk away from me!” Riri shouted as she caught up with us. 

As soon as we stepped inside the lazy cat we were greeted by a woman with dirty blonde hair and a black outfit. “Hello! How are you all doing today?!”

“Fine. How are you?” Riri answered absentmindedly.

While Riri and the woman were talking, I was looking around the restaurant. Surprisingly, it looked really nice inside. It had a red and black decor and was set up like an old school dinner. 

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw what appeared to be white chestnut hair flash by. “What the???” 

“Jeff, let’s go.” Mizuki’s voice snapped me out of my trance and I quickly followed after her and Riri. 

Huh.. must be my imagination. 

We were seated by our waitress and handed our menus. 

I skimmed through the menu, my hunger growing by the second. “Hmm this looks good.” I pointed to a combo. “Pepper Jack burger with special pepper sauce and fries."

Riri and Mizuki were still flipping through their menus in deep contemplation.  

“What are you two thinking about getting to eat?” I asked. 

“The seafood medley. And this lemon ponpon smoothie.” Riri said, almost drooling.

“That smoothie sounds good. I was looking at that too. But I don’t know what to eat?” Mizuki responded, burying her face deeper into the menu.

I looked through my menu as well, and noticed something that I thought Mizuki would like. “How about these mini tacos?”

“Ouu! That does look good!” Mizuki responded cheerfully.  

“Hello! Everyone ready to order?” Our waitress asked. 

“Yeah. I want this pepper jack burger combo with a sprite.” I answered. 

“That’s really good. I like it with extra pepper sauce. What about you two?” The waitress asked as she looked at Riri and Mizuki.  

“The seafood medley and the lemon ponpon smoothie.” Riri responded as she closed the menu.  

“Good choice.” The waitress stated as she scribbled in her notepad. “And you?” 

“Oh! I…” Mizuki looked into her menu one more time before looking back up with a struggling expression. 

“She wants the mini tacos and the lemon ponpon smoothie as well.” I answered. 

Mizuki looked relieved, but didn’t say anything. 

She gets nervous over stuff like this? That’s kind of cute. 

“Excellent!” The waitress answered as she took down Mizuki’s order as well. “Okay I’ll be back with your drinks and your food should come out really soon.”

“Thank you.” We all responded. 

“Oh! You remember what I was telling you about?” Mizuki pulled out her phone and pointed towards Riri. 

“I really don’t get it.” Riri said with a crooked smile. 

“What?! No way!” Mizuki exclaimed, before messing with her phone and pointing it back to Riri. 

Mizuki and Riri started talking about some kpop group. Mizuki was the one leading the conversation while Riri was listening and asking questions.

I still kind of feel weird about them getting along. But, it’s a good thing that my harem members are starting to get along. Who knew they would bond over K-pop of all things?! I didn’t even know Mizuki was into… Kpop.. I didn’t even know that she and Riri were on speaking terms… I..I…actually don’t know anything about them… So how can I call them my Harem??? We’re just acquaintances… at best. 

“Hey. Are you-“ 

“I’m going to wash my hands.” I cut off Mizuki as I stood up. 

I rushed to the bathroom and burst into one of the stalls before vomiting in the toilet. 

Fresh tears cascaded down my cheeks as the acid from my stomach burned my throat. 

I closed the toilet seat before sitting down and focusing on my breathing. 

“Fuck! Fuck!” I felt nauseous and dizzy, my heart was beating a mile a minute. 

Why was I chosen?! I’m not funny! I’m not smart! I’m not athletic! I’m fucking ugly and weird! How do I deserve them?! I can’t even fucking help them! I’m a fucking failure!

I clutched at my chest, the pain almost unbearable. The world was bending and filing in strange ways and my breaths were growing shorter and shorter. “I’M DYING! I’M DYING! I’M DYING! I’M GOING TO FUCKING DIE!” 

“Hey!” A voice entered my ears, monetarily distracting me. 

I looked up to see there was someone standing in front of me. The world was so distorted that I couldn’t make out what they looked like. The only thing I could make out was their silvery blue eyes? Or maybe it was my mind playing tricks on me. 

“Don’t touch me!” I felt a hand on my shoulder and knocked it away in response. 

“It’s okay. It’s okay.” The voice was gentle and soothing, reminiscent of a lullaby. “Take deep breaths. One..two..three..four..” 

I took my time, breathing deeply and slowly while counting. Gradually, my breathing started to improve and my heart started slowing down. I didn’t feel as dizzy, and the world was going back to normal. 

“That was easy.” The person said, with a tinge of happiness lingering in their voice. 

“Y-yeah..thank y-“ I looked up to see my stall door open, but no one was inside. “What the fuck???” 

Did I.. did I just imagine all of that? 

I sat on the toilet for a while and collected my thoughts. After what felt like a good amount of time, I flushed the toilet and got up to go check my appearance. 

When I waltzed up to the mirror I was mortified by what I saw. 

My hair was a complete mess, my eyes were red and swollen from crying. Dark bags hung underneath my eyes. I was unnaturally pale, and I was sweating profusely. “No wonder why people were looking at me strangely…” 

I did my best to fix up my appearance before I headed out of the bathroom. 

As I approached the table, Riri and Mizuki were looking around until they caught sight of me. 

“Hey! What were you doing?! My food is cold because of you!” Riri shouted as she pointed at her food.

“I’m sorry. Thanks for waiting.” I responded as I sat down.  

Mizuki and Riri shot each other's faces before they started eating. 

“Do you want some?” Mizuki asked Riri as she pointed to her tacos. 

“I’m fine. I don’t really like meat.” Riri stated.

“Are you sure?” Mizuki pointed to one of her mini tacos. “The shredded pork one is really good.” 

“Nah I’m good. I don’t even eat pork.” Riri responded with a grossed out face. “Do you want some of mine?” 

“Yeah. The calamari looks really good.” Mizuki grabbed one of Riri’s calamari rings before tossing it into her mouth with a satisfied grin. 

These two are pretty cute. I feel kind of lucky. 

“You’re not eating?” Mizuki suddenly asked. 

I looked down at my burger and fries. 

It does look good. But, I don’t have much of an appetite anymore.

I noticed Riri glaring at me, so I quickly gave her an answer. 

“I’m not wasting your food. I’ll get a carry out.” I took a sip of my sprite to hopefully calm my stomach a little. 

Riri kept looking at me, her frown deepening by the second. “Why are you so upset over a thot pocket?!” 

I nearly spit out my soda, coughing a little to clear my throat. “Why do you keep doing that?! What’s your problem?” 

“You’re my problem!” Riri screamed. “All of this mopy bullshit you've been doing! We can tell that you went to the bathroom to cry like a bitch! And for what?! A hoe?! And we’re just supposed to act like it’s normal?!

“I’m sorry.” I responded, my eyes tearing up. 

“Stop apologizing! You sound pathetic!” Riri stood up, pounding her hands on the table. 

The people nearby started looking at us to see what the commotion was.

Riri suddenly turned her attention to Mizuki. “Why aren’t you backing me up on this?! You want to know just as bad as me!” 

“Y-yeah! But, he has a right to privacy!” Mizuki responded clumsily, seemingly caught off guard. 

“Bih!!” Riri ruffled her hair. “That’s not what you said in the messages?!”

“I-I know.. it’s just.” Mizuki averted her eyes. 

At this point, everyone in the restaurant was looking at us. Our server looked confused and turned back around. 

Riri suddenly pointed at me. “You can do better! Much better! You’re not even that bad! You’re actually kind of cute!”

Riri’s eyes shot open, just realizing what she said. Mizuki stared at her Riri as she was having a difficult time getting her words together. 

“So are you offering?” I retorted, my blood boiling. 

“I-I-I.. didn’t mean..” Riri fumbled over her words one after the other as she avoided eye contact with me. 

“Exactly!” I shouted as I stood up. “You’re right! I am a mopy bitch! I am pathetic! Maybe Saya isn’t worth caring about!”

I thought I just cared about Saya because she was supposed to be apart of my harem and I wanted to fuck her. But, that’s not the case. I don't know why I want to help her. 

Tears started spilling out of my eyes. “But, I don’t care! I still want to help her! And..and..and I don’t know how!” 

All of my energy drained instantly, and I slumped down into my seat. 

“What?!” Mizuki suddenly shouted, her voice filled with anger. “Look at what she did to you?! Why do you care about someone who doesn’t give a fuck about you?!” Tears started streaming down Mizuki’s face as her fist trembled. “Are you stupid?!”

I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. No matter how hard I tried.

It’s not like I have anything to say. She’s right. 

“Jeff.” Riri said my name, her facial expression complicated. “You can’t save everyone.”