The world is not always as beautiful and forgiving as one would imagine, and Korra Grey, a young florist, who is abducted by a creature of the children's books, finds herself in another world quickly learning that life can be even crueler than she thought.
After more than a year of pain and suffering in the madman's cellar, she gets what she sought the most, freedom. Though changed by cruelty she suffered. Either she learns to live with the mutations or finds a way to reverse them while she struggles to find her own place in a world utterly unknown to her, hunted not only by the nightmares of her past.
Art by.. Me :)
Updates: Wednesday, Saturday - at least I'm trying
I am currently releasing this story on scribblehub.com and royalroad.com.
Transported to another world (isekai), somewhat standard fantasy setting with my beginner attempts to make it dark but not too much. There are litRPG elements there, but numbers are not what this story is about. You could say it's with a touch of Slice of Life. Yet, you can expect fights, monsters, beasts, and enemies from the ranks of humans, but not OP MC - she will have to get there.
The story I wrote after I found the courage to do so. I don't want to discourage you, but I say in advance that English is my second language, and that can be reflected in grammar. I'm doing my best, so please be lenient. :)
Really the only negative thing I have to say about this story, is that it gets nowhere fast. Even at the current release rate of two chapter per week, it can take weeks to get through a single day.
To give you a better idea, 126 chapters in and barely around a week passed in-world since the start of the story proper.
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Edit: I'm dropping this as of chapter 195. Minor spoilers follow.
Nothing wrong when the MC loses to objectively stronger oponents, but when the author pulls what I would personally call Deus ex machina literally at the last second, by making her... lets say instincts react in a way completely different from a very similar situation earlier in the story, just to make her lose an already lost fight even harder, it is grating.
It does not help that someone who, by how he was introduced before, should have been able to intervene in time to prevent the worst, but did not even realize something was wrong until after it was all over.
And to rub insult into injury, it is all turned into just an overly dramatic character introduction, when there is no meaningful or lasting consequence for everything that happened, with the MC and the character in question moving on practically as if nothing happened.
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This story is really good. So far we only have been introduced to a few characters, but the ones we have been shown so far are well-written, and beliveable in their interactions with the protagonist. The release schedule is slower than I would have preferred, but the quality of the writing more than makes up for it.
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A wonderful story that has done well to keep me invested and intrigued. My only major gripe within the story is a lack of world building, the author has done a good job of placing the characters within this world, but I don't fell immersed within it. There are so many things I don't know that hasn't received attention, however I am excited to see this world explored in the future. A fun read that I expect good things from in the future.
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This review is cross-posted from another site where this fiction is hosted. I'm reviewing it here because it deserves the review and exposure. Lament of the Slave is one of my favorite literary RPG titles of all time. It's unapologetically isekai, with almost zero explanation of the pre-yoink world. Instead it opts to jump straight into building a very rich, detailed and robust world for our protagonist. It doesn't get bogged down in some of the clutter that other isekai fictions struggle with, and outside of it being the reason as to why the character doesn't know anything, largely doesn't dwell on the issue. Nirrvash does two things extremely well in this story: world building and character writing. Not every character is created equally, a few can feel a bit flat at times, but you never feel as if there are trope or cutout characters in the story. The protagonist and some of the supporting cast all get pretty good amounts of development and screen time. It keeps a pretty tight roster despite it's overall size, with later chapters having about a dozen or so characters of serious importance. That itself is something to be commended, as many series of this size tend to start getting a rather bloated cast of characters. Instead of breadth we get depth. Again, not every character is incredibly deep, but the ones who we get to know better do an excellent job of supporting the lore of the world and fitting into the overall picture. They all feel like believable people with their own distinct personalities, traits and flaws. The world building manages a fine balance between detail, history and being a believable living world. LotS is a dungeon delving type story, and while the environment of the dungeon can be a bit bland and repetitive, it's explained in a coherent fashion and fits the lore of the world. I really enjoyed the details about the food and drink, sights, smells and sounds of the city in which the story is set. Our protagonist isn't quite a hedonist, but we get a good feel for the small day-to-day details of what living life in her world is like, and that's really appreciated. LotS isn't a perfect story, and has challenges in a few areas that are worth mentioning. Nirrvash is clearly an English as a Second Language or otherwise non-native English speaker. Their grammar and spelling is generally quite good despite of this, but it's noticeable in the way sentences are structured and in some of the speech patterns. I dinged the story a point for it, but in my honest opinion, it's sort of endearingly quirky in the same way a master Yoda is. It might be a problem for some readers, but I never felt like I had any issues understanding the writing. The other area that Lament struggles in at times is in the pacing. Now, I quite enjoy a rather slower-burn story, something with a more relaxed pace, but I also recognize that in this genre, that's sort of a contentious issue. Personally, I never found myself yawning or bored with a chapter, but there are places in the story that are heavier with world building or plot exposition and it can, at times, feel little on the slow side. If you go into reading the story with this in mind, it probably won't bother you. If you are looking for a high octane speedy and action-heavy story though, then this might not be a good story to devote time to reading. One other area that I think needs to be mentioned is that this is not a story with a overpowered protagonist. Our protagonist is strong in some places, and very weak in others. She's a flawed and fragile character who works extremely hard at training and improving herself. In this reader's opinion, that's a good thing. Overpowered characters can quickly become boring and often lack in depth. Nirrvash does a great job of reminding the reader that life in their world is tough, and even the strong can benefit from friends, or fall to traps and treachery. Nirrvash, if you wind up reading this, I hope you are able to overcome some of the issues you've written about that keep you from wanting to continue the series. You've made something special here, and even if reader engagement is low, comments are shallow or mean, you shouldn't give up on LotS. I'm leaving you this review as a reminder and to speak for the hundreds of readers you have who enjoy the series but haven't taken the time to recognize you for it. Lament has some rough edges here and there, but it's a great story with an incredible world, and I look forwards to continuing to read it for years to come, should you find it in yourself to continue. You've visibly improved as a writer throughout the series! Don't let the rough spots feel like a stone in your boot, rubbing you raw. They really, truly, aren't as big of a deal to us as you might think they are.
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The grammar is good no flaws there.
The plot is Interesting but I can’t see the MC completing any goal for 200+ chapters.
The side characters are pretty good but it’s kinda funny how no one’s taken advantage of her blurting out every single skill out loud or how she can’t or doesn’t disguise her rarer skills.
The MC is a big NO, like she is the perfect slave and side character but not an MC, let me explain, so she was tortured for over a year and turned into an inhuman and you would think ok the goal is revenge by any means but nope, she can barely kill a fruit fly and even then she has to do it “humanly” and not by poison or hidden weapons cause that’s bad, like WTH!
or the fact she doesn’t research what species she was spliced with or a world map or just a library in general and doesn’t plan or think ahead at all, one good example is her switching out her decently high and TRAINED poison resistance for some random skill THEN getting a higher tier poison which proceeds to immediately incapacitate her and almost kill her like if she was a side character she would and should be dead cause no way someone with that little forward thinking is amounting to anything except a team killer and specifically her team.
Just in general super good but you could not have made a worse MC for the job, no wait you could’ve made her Completely brain dead.
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This is a great story, with exciting characters, and an interresting, if cunfusingly undeveloped world. I love reading it, though the pacing is very slow. I really like the MC. They have depth, care and an interresting personality, and exciting traits, which breaks from the norm in you run of the mill isekai. Not a teenager, but a grown late 20s adult. Not a powerhouse with a cheat skill or crazy overpowered, (Though they do gain awesome skills), and forced into a life so far removed from their ideals and hopes that they constantly feel out of place, not due to power but just from being different. Excellent start. There are some problems though:
The main character will space out, stop what their doing, and hink and reflect over heir body, actions or the world around them for minutes at a time, entire chapters, even in life-or-death, dangerous combat situations. It isn't between moments, like; "flashed through my mind" or "I considered between steps". The author litterally has the MC and other characters say she stopped moving, or was lost in thought, or stoppet fighting because of their inner monologue. This will also affect her in her day-to-day activities, asking questions, hearing answers, then spending an entire chaper retelling what we just heard in her own words. On occation very annoying.
She also will stop talking to people, because she doesn't know if she is allowed to, because figures in authority whos job it litterally is to tell her this have not done so. At the same time, everyone around her says they will keep her secrets, but talks about her skills to others in EVERY CHAPTER of the story. She is way to considerate and submissive despite her great goal being to not be a slave any more.
Despite this, this is a great story. It is slice of life, so the slow pacing is great. You love the characters you are introduced to, and the story is exciting, although you don't know what it is building towards untill you are there. Would have given the story a full 5/5 if the MC at any point grew more decisive, or the inner monologue was not such a litteral handicap. Keep writing, and I will keep reading.
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I'm dropping this at chapter 98 and the reason is basically MC asks too many things. You can say it's author's way of explaining the universe to us but she asks everything even the answers were obvious and they discuss this simple things for whole chapter. I mean she acts like she is unable the think at all. Then after getting answers, she starts with her inner monologue which is more pain to read. This really disrupts the flow. The action scenes were well written for me but for the rest, I can't say the same thing.
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This is just a really, really good story. It's mostly slice-of-life type things, but there's a lot of lore that slowly gets explored, and plenty of interesting things going on. Sometimes the pacing is slow, other times fast, but always good. Give it a read.
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This is an amazing story so far. I have nothing bad to say about it honestly. There are a few grammar mistakes here and there but those will be fixed during revision and maybe even improved.
The sequence of events keeps you entertained and interested in what’s going on and I have had a blast reading this while I could (at current chapter: 98).
The author portrays events well, has a good reference of the world the MC is in and a part of. They show and convey the thoughts of the MC as well as those around her very well and the slow build to understand herself and get stronger is a nice change in the recent things I’ve read so far on this platform.
I highly recommend you to read this and don’t be surprised if you get pissed off because of twists and certain events that challenge the MC’s state of mind and physical capability
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Hello, when I started your story, I was hooked and couldn't stop until the end. It's well written, the MC and the story are interesting.
I loved it, I will be looking forward to the next chapters.
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