The king has died. Without an heir apparent the entire kingdom is on the verge of war debating about who should rule next. In order to determine the next king a King’s Game is announced. Gathering twelve participants onto the Aloock islands they are made to compete against each other. Among the twelve a small war begins using the island natives as pawns and tools the king candidates play war against each other all acting as pawns of even greater forces.
The story feels like a play. The MC gets task and completes it in the next moment. The chances for world building and character building lost. Then you have the forced character emotions... I get it a character needs to have a set personality but don't force it make us slowly discover it.
But the main problem is the feeling of no connection with the MC. A Mary sue character with no connection is more of an aversion than anything.
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